Intimate Surrender

by RaeAnne Thayne

  "I never changed my mind."

  "Then why haven't you said a word about it for the last few days?"

  He said nothing for so long she finally dropped her hands and squared her shoulders to face him. His mouth was tight and his eyes were dark with an unreadable expression, something deep and tender that sent butterflies somersaulting around her stomach.

  "I meant what I said to your mother. I think you're a beautiful, smart, courageous woman. I didn't tell her everything, though."

  He reached between them to clasp her fingers. The butterflies went into cartwheels and handsprings as her heart began to pump.

  "No?" her voice sounded like a mouse's tiny squeak but he didn't appear to notice.

  Peter shook his head. "I didn't tell her that night we spent together was the most incredible, magical night of my life. I didn't tell her how I searched for you for weeks and how empty and lonely my life seemed from the moment I woke alone in my bed until I found you again."

  He was quiet again, then his gaze met hers. "I didn't tell her I fell in love that night."

  For one brief moment, a brilliant, piercing joy washed through her, then she realized what he said and the joy quickly turned to ashes. "You fell in love with an illusion. Celeste wasn't real."

  "She's part of you, whether you can see it or not."

  Katie made a skeptical sound and Peter raised their entwined fingers and kissed the back of her hand. "She is. You're right, though, maybe I didn't know the real you after that single incredible night. But we've had more than that here and I've only fallen more deeply in love with you every day we've been together."

  His kiss was sweet and tender and warmed all the cold, empty places inside of her. She clung to him, tears trickling down her cheeks.

  "Blasted hormones," she mumbled through her tears. She had cried more the last week than she had her entire adult life.

  "I hope those are happy tears," Peter murmured.

  "They are. Oh, they are."

  She kissed him with all the love and longing she had been saving for years. When he drew away several moments later, both of them were breathing raggedly and Peter's eyes were dazed, aroused.

  He said only one word. "Wow."

  She laughed even though those dratted tears continued to fall. He gently wiped one away with his thumb before it reached her cheek, then shook his head as if to clear it.

  "I told your mother you could have your pick of any man in the world. Why did you pick me that night? I figured out a long time ago you weren't after Logan secrets. Why did you come home with me?"

  Was that insecurity in his eyes? she wondered. Could he really not know how irresistible he was?

  "You don't remember the first time we danced, do you? Not the night of the gala but long before then."

  He shook his head, baffled.

  "I do. Every second of it. I was fifteen years old and fat. Not chubby, fat. Sheila dressed me in ruffles and bows for my first big society event during one of my visits home and I looked hideous, with thick glasses and all those flounces."

  She grimaced at the memory. "I felt even more miserable than I'm sure I looked. I didn't want to be there. I wanted to be home with a good book. Even boarding school would have been better."

  Though he was confused, he didn't interrupt her story, curious where this was all going.

  "I was an easy target for several girls who—who liked to pick on anyone more vulnerable than they were. We were standing in a corner of the ballroom and they started making fun of me, saying I looked like a giant pink birthday cake with all my flounces, which was nothing but the truth. I was trying my best not to let them see me cry but I was losing the battle. Then you came over."

  He should remember. He wanted to remember but he'd been to so many of those kinds of functions, and this one just didn't stand out.

  "You were eighteen and heading to college and all the girls were crazy about you."

  She smiled a little. "You probably didn't know that, did you? As I remember, you were busy even then trying to follow in your father's footsteps. Anyway, Angelina Mitchell was the prettiest of the group and she preened a little, certain, I'm sure, that you were going to ask her to dance. But you didn't. You walked right up to me—shy, fat Katie Crosby!—and asked me in this deep, confident voice if I would do you the great honor of dancing with you."

  He could feel himself flush, though he wasn't sure why. He still couldn't remember the event, maybe because he had often danced with wallflowers at country club functions or other society events. He had never had much interest in the popular girls. At least the wallflowers usually made halfway decent conversation and wanted to know more about him than what kind of car he drove.

  He cleared the sudden gruffness from his voice. "I guess we danced, then?"

  She nodded and he felt about a hundred miles tall at the stars in her eyes at the memory. "I know you were only being kind, rescuing me from what you must have figured out was the other girls' bullying, but it was the most romantic moment of my life. I think I fell in love with you that night."

  His arms tightened around her and he closed his eyes, supremely grateful for a mother who drilled kindness and good manners into her sons.

  "I haven't felt beautiful very often in my life," Katie went on. "That was the first time. The second time was the night of the charity gala. When you danced with me, I was fifteen years old again, in the arms of the most wonderful boy I'd ever met. I didn't want it to end. That's why I didn't tell you my name, because I wanted that night to last forever."

  He shifted his hand to the swelling of her abdomen, to their child growing there. "In a way, I guess it has."

  Her smile was radiant as she kissed him again. "That was the perfect thing to say," she murmured. "This baby is a gift. A precious way to help us always remember a wonderful, magical night. I love you, Peter. I loved you when I was fifteen and I love you a million times more now."

  "When will you marry me?" he asked, when he could speak again through the emotions clogging his throat.

  Doubts flickered in her eyes again. "Are you sure? You saw tonight what you might be in for. And what about your parents? They won't be thrilled about all this."

  "When they get to know you, they'll love you as much as I do." It was true, he realized. His mom and Katie would bond instantly. His father might be a little harder to win over but he would be impressed by her brains and her business sense. Affection would soon follow. Terrence wouldn't be able to resist her.

  "Marry me, Katie," he urged, his hand still on her abdomen. "Right now. Tonight. We can fly to Las Vegas and be married by midnight. I don't want to waste another moment."

  She drew in a deep breath, then covered her hand with his, until they were both cradling the child growing there.

  "All right." She gave him another one of those radiant smiles. "Let's go now. We have a new family dynasty to create."

  One that would be built on joy and laughter and love.

  Epilogue

  "You look beautiful, Katie. I don't have to ask if Logan is making you happy. If the power suddenly went out in here, you would give off enough of a glow to light up the whole place."

  Katie smiled at Trent, handsome and commanding in his tuxedo. "I'm happier than I've ever been in my life."

  "Good. You deserve it. And I guess if Peter Logan is the one making you so happy, he can't be all bad."

  Trent's bluster was mostly for show, she knew. Her brother and her new husband had actually gotten along remarkably well after she and Peter returned from their brief honeymoon. The two men were alike in far more ways than they were different.

  As she and Trent twirled around the Hilton ballroom—where it all began, she thought with a smile—Katie gazed around at the crowd that had gathered to celebrate her marriage to Peter. Hundreds of people were here. Leslie Logan had thrown herself with enthusiasm into organizing the reception. She had invited not only all the Logan and Crosby employees but also employees at Portland General Ho
spital and Children's Connection, until the big room was filled to bursting.

  Even the Portland Weekly society reporter was there. Katie had made a special point of making sure he received an invitation, since without that picture she and Peter wouldn't have found each other again.

  Everyone she loved was in this room, she thought. Except Danny, who hadn't been able to leave his island retreat.

  Her father was dancing with Toni. Ivy, glowing from pregnancy herself, was in the arms of her handsome king.

  To her surprise, Sheila had even come, though under duress. She still wasn't at all pleased about her daughter marrying a Logan. But after Jack had surprised Katie by threatening to take Sheila back to court to reduce her alimony if she didn't support her daughter, Sheila seemed to resign herself to it.

  She was coldly polite to Peter, but that was more than Katie ever expected.

  Like a magnet finding north, her eyes turned automatically to her husband, currently smiling down at Dorothea Aldridge as they whirled around the room together.

  She turned back to her brother. "Peter is wonderful. Every day I fall more in love with him."

  Trent sighed. "You know, I envy you. I wish my own trip down the aisle had turned out as well as yours."

  She hugged him, her heart aching for him even in the midst of her bubbling joy. She knew how much the failure of his marriage stung him. "I know. I do, too. But maybe the Crosby luck is finally changing. Ivy and Max are deliriously happy, just as Peter and I are. We both found love—maybe you and Danny will have your turn soon."

  Trent looked skeptical but before he could reply, Peter whirled Mrs. Aldridge toward them and tapped Trent on the shoulder.

  "Dorothea says now that I'm no longer available, dancing with me isn't nearly as much fun as it used to be. She's got this thing for bachelors. Since I told her you're the most eligible one I know, she decided she didn't want to waste her time dancing with an old married man like me and insisted we trade partners."

  "We Crosbys are better dancers anyway." Trent smiled at Dorothea, who chuckled and allowed herself to be handed off to him. The two of them spun away, leaving Peter to take Katie into his arms.

  "Smooth. Very smooth, Mr. Logan," she mimicked her words of that night months before.

  He played along. "When a beautiful woman crosses my path, I'm not stupid enough to give her any chance to slip away."

  "This woman doesn't want to slip away," she murmured. "She doesn't want to be anywhere but right here, in your arms."

  He kissed her, and though it was chaste enough for the family crowd gathered in the ballroom, her insides still clenched with desire. Every time they touched, this same heat sparked between them.

  She had to admit she'd been a little afraid the wild passion between them after the charity gala had just been chance, a result of the romance of the night and maybe too much champagne. But any doubts she might have had on that score were quickly laid to rest on their honeymoon. She flushed, remembering.

  If anything, their lovemaking had been better. Their shared love added a deep emotional intensity she never would have imagined.

  She was warm suddenly from more than the exertion and the crowded ballroom. "I could use some water and fresh air."

  With the solicitous care that constantly amazed her, he led her over to the bar and snagged a glass of ice water. "I'm sorry you can't have champagne," he said when he handed the water to her.

  She made a wry face. "I'm not. It makes me do crazy things."

  "I know. Believe me, I plan to keep that in mind after you have the baby."

  His teasing leer made her laugh. "I don't need champagne when I'm around you. You're intoxicating enough."

  At that, he had to stop and kiss her again. When he lifted his head, Katie felt someone watching them. She shifted her gaze from Peter's to find a dark-haired man watching them. He looked somehow familiar but she couldn't place him. She gave him a hesitant smile, a little unnerved by something in his expression.

  He quickly looked away but not before she thought she saw confusion and naked pain in his eyes.

  That was odd, she thought, but her attention was diverted when Leslie and Terrence approached them. Peter kissed his mother on the cheek while Terrence threaded his arm through Katie's

  "Everything is so lovely," Katie told Peter's mother. "You did a wonderful job with this reception."

  "It's not every day that a mother's oldest son gets married." Leslie smiled at her. "And since we missed that part when the two of you rushed to Las Vegas, I wanted the reception to be spectacular."

  That had been one of the biggest shocks of her marriage, Katie acknowledged. Peter had been right. Once they learned a child was on the way and realized their son loved her, Terrence and Leslie had welcomed her into their family—with hesitant arms at first, but their initial reserve had quickly melted. Already she was coming to care for them.

  "Thank you. We'll remember this night for the rest of our lives."

  Leslie smiled and reached for her hand. "You make a beautiful bride, Katie. My son is a lucky man."

  She still wasn't sure she quite believed that—the beautiful part anyway—but after a week of marriage, she was beginning to see herself through different eyes. Maybe it was pregnancy, or maybe it came from being so deeply loved, but she had decided she wasn't the Crosby ugly duckling after all. She never had been. She had just preferred hiding in that invisible comfort zone.

  Leaving it had been terrifying but so worth it, Katie thought, a sweet joy settling in her chest. Who would have believed the night of the bachelor charity auction that in a few months' time she would find herself married to the man she had loved since an act of kindness more than a decade ago, the man she loved more than she ever thought possible?

  The baby moved, almost as if sensing her thoughts, and she smiled and touched a hand to her abdomen.

  "How's he doing?" Peter asked. An ultrasound the day before had revealed their child was definitely a boy.

  "Fine. I think he wants to dance."

  Peter smiled. "We'd better oblige him, don't you think?"

  Their baby would come into a loving home, Katie thought as her husband took her into his arms, to a mother and father who already adored him and each other.

  She couldn't ask for anything more.

  * * *

  With an odd feeling of unreality, Everett Baker watched the newly married couple share a tender embrace then turn to smile at the groom's parents.

  The Logans' oldest son and his bride.

  His chest tightened and he couldn't seem to breathe in the stuffy ballroom. He felt odd, dizzy and a little nauseated as he watched them together. They looked so in love, so full of joy.

  He should never have come. He didn't belong here with these happy, good, decent people. But when that invitation had arrived, as it had to all employees of Children's Connection, he had stared at a single line for hours.

  Peter Logan, son of Leslie and Terrence Logan.

  The line rang in his head like some horrible nursery rhyme, crowding everything else out until it was the only thing he could think about.

  He hadn't been able to stay away but now that he was here, he knew coming had been a terrible mistake.

  You're nothing, boy. Less than nothing.

  He heard Lester Baker's voice in his head, as he did so often, and knew the man was right. Everett shouldn't be here. He didn't deserve to be here.

  He jostled his way through the crowd and hurried out the door, away from all this laughter and dancing and painful happiness and into the darkness where he belonged.

  Special thanks and acknowledgment are given to RaeAnne Thayne for her contribution to the LOGAN'S LEGACY series.

  ISBN: 978-1-4268-6526-8

  INTIMATE SURRENDER

  Copyright © 2004 by Harlequin Books S.A.

  All rights reserved. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilization of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or oth
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  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

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  Table of Contents

  RAEANNE THAYNE

  One

  Two

  Three

  Four

  Five

  Six

  Seven

  Eight

  Nine

  Ten

  Eleven

  Twelve

  Epilogue