by Clare Lydon
“That’s settled, then,” Alan said, rubbing his hands together. “Shall we have a nightcap before we retire?”
Tanya didn’t know much, but she knew a drink sounded like a godsend.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
“Are you sure about this?” Tanya said, glancing down at the towels, spare T-shirts and toothbrushes Alan had left on the white duvet. “I’m happy to take the sofa if you prefer.”
Sophie glanced up, stroking her cheek as she did. “I can keep control of myself if you can,” she said, with a tiny smile, before holding up one of Alan’s T-shirts. It had the words ‘I Love British Rail’ written on it, and it was about ten sizes too big for Sophie. “Although now I’ve seen the T-shirts we’re sleeping in, it might be more of a struggle.”
Tanya chuckled, holding up her own to read it, before bending over laughing.
“What?” Sophie said. “What does yours say?”
Tanya took a little time to recover, swallowing down her snorts before replying. “I can’t,” she said, shaking her head. Tanya flopped down on the bed, before handing the T-shirt to Sophie.
Sophie held it up, before grinning hard. On the front of Tanya’s faded pink T-shirt were the words ‘Gay Men’s Chorus’.
“I don’t know, do you really think he’s gay?” Sophie said, before laying down next to Tanya, the T-shirt still clasped in her hands. She was laughing so hard and then trying not to laugh at the same time, and the bed was shaking.
“I know, I’m a terrible surrogate daughter,” Tanya said, when she could breathe again.
“You are,” Sophie replied. But she was smiling, too, because laying there next to Tanya felt calming, right. Tanya’s warmth was buzzing from her, and Alan’s welcome was all around.
Sophie had been fearing the worst — and she knew that was still to come — but she was glad for Tanya that she had a place to come, a place of love and shelter. Everybody needed that. And she was glad she was able to experience it with her, to see a different side to Tanya. Because everyone became a different person when they went home, and Tanya clearly saw Alan’s house as just that.
“You want to use the bathroom first?” Tanya grazed Sophie’s arm, breaking her thoughts. Her touch made Sophie’s breath catch in her throat, but she rolled off the bed as if nothing had happened. Yes, the situation was escalating, she knew that, but she wasn’t ready to deal with it just yet.
However, when she looked at Tanya and saw her eyes, as dark and swirling as galaxies, she knew she’d felt it, too. That indiscernible thing she couldn’t quite put her finger on.
The kernel of an idea, the seed of what might be.
And now they had to share a bed together. One big bed with them both just in T-shirts and knickers: naked legs, arms and faces, and lips within kissing distance. Lips that Sophie had been assessing the entire drive here, and now, they were hot and close.
How was she going to get through this without expiring? How was she going to be under the same duvet without pinning Tanya down? She’d just have to work out a way. Because she was here to be Tanya’s support, she knew that, and the last thing Tanya needed was a distraction from the main point of being here: namely, rescuing Delilah.
And yes, being in the same bed together was a huge distraction, but Sophie was an adult, so she could deal with it.
Despite the fact her heart was beating like a kick drum.
Her phone went, interrupting the moment. She snatched it up from her bedside table, frowning. “It’s a London number, but I don’t recognise it,” she said, swiping the green button right. “Hello?”
It was a client, a man called Tim. Apparently, his girlfriend was away with work, and he’d left his bag in the pub with his keys in it. Tim was slurring his words and hoping Sophie would come to his rescue.
“Sorry Tim, I’m in the Midlands, I can’t help you out,” Sophie said, shaking her head at Tanya. “Best thing to do would be to break a window or go and stay with a friend — whichever’s easiest.” She paused. “Good luck!”
Sophie quit the call and put her phone back on the bedside table. “I don’t know what these people did before they had me walking their dogs. I’ve only got eight clients and three of them have called me having locked themselves out, wanting the key they gave me.” She paused. “Seriously, put one under the mat or something.”
Tanya grinned at her. “You do have that look about you — the one that says you’ll rescue someone in distress.” She paused, locking her gaze with Sophie’s. “You’re doing it for me right now,” she added, her voice an octave lower, her cheeks showing a slight flush.
Sophie’s clit pulsed when Tanya spoke, and she looked down, just as they heard Alan come out of the bathroom. She went to speak, but her breath stuttered even as she tried to regain control of it.
“I’ll be quick,” Sophie said, walking round the bed and reaching for the door.
Once inside the bathroom, she slid the lock across and sat down on the loo, her heart still doing press-ups, her head in a spin.
What was it Rachel had said? That when she eventually let her guard down and started to like someone, it was going to floor her? If her body was saying anything to her, then this was that moment.
She needed to calm down, process and try not to hump Tanya in her sleep. She took a deep breath in, then out, and tried not to focus on how Tanya’s long legs had looked on the bed, how her hair had splayed on her pillow.
She shook her head, imagining somewhere else. Somewhere like Tanya’s flat. And then she imagined Tanya pushing her down on top of her wooden dining table, spreading her legs and…
Sophie shook her head harder this time.
Fucking hell, she was doomed, wasn’t she?
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Tanya walked back into Alan’s guest room, where Sophie was already under the covers, her head poking out. “Hey,” she said.
She looked adorable, and that’s when Tanya knew this might be more tricky than she’d first thought. Adorable? When she started thinking things like that, she knew a line had been crossed in her head. And then it was only a matter of time before it was crossed in real life.
But this situation wasn’t typical. If Tanya thought someone was cute in real life, she’d chat them up, with the hope of getting them into bed. This situation was far from normal, because Sophie was already in her bed. However, what they’d shared today was different: Tanya was on unfamiliar turf, with a whole new set of rules.
Sophie was different, and she didn’t want to bugger up their emerging friendship — wherever that ended up. Sophie had said she could control herself: Tanya just hoped she could promise the same.
“Hey,” she replied, getting into bed and laying still, just like she used to when she was younger and playing sleeping lions. If she moved, she might touch Sophie, and she didn’t want to run the risk. As she lay still, she was aware both of their breathing was a little laboured.
“Did you notice the massive Abba collection in the lounge?” Sophie asked, staring at the ceiling.
“I would have stopped him if he tried to put it on, don’t worry,” Tanya replied. “And anyway, that doesn’t mean he’s gay, that just means he’s got great musical taste.”
“What about the lavender handwash in the bathroom?” Sophie said, turning her head to Tanya. “Exhibit number 243 in the Alan Is Gay show.”
Tanya smiled, turning her head to Sophie. “Okay, you win. Can we change the record now?”
“I just like teasing you,” Sophie replied, before locking eyes with Tanya. “About Alan,” she added quickly, turning to stare at the ceiling.
Tanya gulped. Sophie had said the word ‘teasing’ while they were laying in bed. Suddenly, her mind pressed play on its very own mini-series named Sophie, formed of small vignettes: Sophie smiling on her balcony; laughing in her car; blushing in Alan’s bed.
It wasn’t helping, and Tanya tried to shut it down before it got out of control. She was in charge of her own mind and actions: at lea
st, she hoped she was.
Her phone bleeped on the side and she rolled over, picking it up. It was a text from Alice, asking how the rescue had gone. She put the phone back on the bedside table and switched it to silent.
“Everything okay?” Sophie asked.
Tanya nodded. “Yes, fine.”
Sophie waited a couple of seconds before continuing. “You know, if you’d told me a few weeks ago when you landed on me in the lift that I’d be lying in a strange bed with you in a Gay Men’s Chorus T-shirt, I wouldn’t have believed you.”
Tanya grinned, turning her head. “Was it the T-shirt that took the scenario too far?”
Sophie smiled. “Absolutely.” She paused. “I thought you were so rude at first, you know. Terrible manners, and I think manners are underrated.”
“I can’t say I blame you,” Tanya replied. “Our first few meetings weren’t stellar.”
“No,” Sophie said, a smile in her voice. “But you’ve hauled yourself back, and now, here we are.”
“So what do you think of me now?” Tanya asked.
***
Sophie took a deep breath, turning her head so their faces were inches from each other on their pillows, so close she could see the baby-fine hair above Tanya’s upper lip.
“Now,” she said, finding Tanya’s gaze. “Now I just think you’ve got terrible taste in music and awful gaydar.”
Tanya grinned at Sophie. “I’ll give you the second one,” she said. “But my musical taste is good. Come over for dinner at my flat and I’ll prove it to you.”
Sophie swallowed down hard, her whole body whirring to life: Tanya was proposing a proper date and she hoped this one might actually happen.
“I’d love to come over for dinner,” Sophie said, before pausing. Some of Tanya’s hair was falling on her face and straying into her eye. Her natural instinct was to reach out and push it away, but her hand was paralysed.
She was in bed with Tanya, in Alan’s house, so her natural instincts had to be curbed. She’d promised.
“And what about me? What did you think about me at first and now?” Sophie studied Tanya’s face as she answered. Her skin looked so soft, and she had the faintest of laughter lines around her mouth and her eyes.
Those laughter lines became more pronounced as Tanya smiled. “I thought you were amazingly cute when you were vexed at me in the lift,” she said. “And how could I miss your eyes? I couldn’t stop staring.”
That wasn’t the answer she’d been expecting: honest, forthright, daring. Sophie’s heart boomed when she heard it.
“But I was in the wrong, so you were right to be vexed,” Tanya continued. “I owe you a bottle of wine as an apology. I was going to bring one round, but with gran dying, I forgot. Sorry.”
Sophie blinked. “You’re forgiven.”
“Thanks,” Tanya said, before continuing. “And then, when I saw you and you helped us move, I thought you were pretty heroic to stop us getting crushed by my sofa. Although when your dog peed on my foot, that was a bit much.”
Sophie allowed a grin to punctuate her face. “Not my dog. And in my defence, it was my second time out with him — I can’t untrain bad habits that quickly.”
“Bad Branston.”
“You remember his name, I’m impressed.”
“He made an impression,” Tanya replied, her tongue stroking her top lip, which distracted Sophie. “A bit like you. I was unlikely to forget you.” Tanya paused. “Not when you saved the day, and especially not when you’re so beautiful, too.” As the words tumbled out of her mouth, Tanya’s face froze, along with her breath.
Sophie’s brain went into lockdown, too. Did Tanya really just say she was beautiful?
She wasn’t sure how to respond, so she simply gawped at Tanya, her mouth slightly ajar. “You think I’m beautiful?” she said eventually, her eyes never leaving Tanya.
She hadn’t expected that. She knew there was something between them, but for Tanya to say that? It made Sophie’s head spin that little bit more. Tanya was being brave, putting herself out there, jumping without a safety net. It was something Sophie had to get better at, and her heart’s response was to break into applause.
Sophie could learn a lot from Tanya. And right now, she wanted to drape herself over her and soak up everything she could.
Tanya simply nodded, slowly, carefully, as if she did it any harder her pillow might break in two.
Sophie reached out her hand now, sweeping Tanya’s fringe from her face, leaving the tips of her fingers to skate across Tanya’s left cheek. As she touched her, she heard Tanya’s breath hitch, suspended in time.
And then her eyes were on Tanya’s mouth, with a laser focus, willing her lips closer to her own. Should she close the space between them? Was this a good idea with everything that was to come tomorrow?
It was probably the worst time to start anything, she knew that.
However, the decision was taken out of her hands as a banging on the door interrupted the moment.
They sprang apart, both of them sitting up. Sophie’s stomach fell to the floor as her mouth filled with saliva. She couldn’t hear anything but her heartbeat in her ears and the deafening anxiety plastered on Tanya’s face.
“I’m just going to bed, girls. Have you got everything you need?” Alan’s voice was low and thick through the bedroom door.
Tanya’s face was bright red next to her, clashing with her pink T-shirt. “Yes thanks, Alan. We’re all good. See you in the morning!”
“Righteo!” he said. “Sleep well.”
“You, too,” Tanya replied, holding her breath.
Sophie heard Alan’s footsteps retreating, then his bedroom door shutting.
She sat still, the only sound their breathing.
Then she felt Tanya slide down inside the covers again, and she followed, both staring at the ceiling.
The tension hovered over them like a mosquito, buzzing on a low setting all around.
“I guess we should get some sleep. We’ve got a big day tomorrow and an early start,” Tanya said, her voice a whisper.
Sophie nodded her head, a cocktail of disappointment and understanding pooling in her stomach. There was nothing she’d like more right now than to kiss Tanya into next week and to feel her body next to hers, on top of hers, under hers. But she knew this wasn’t the right time
“We should,” Sophie concurred, sadness enveloping her weak smile. They had all the time in the world to explore what might become of them, and tonight wasn’t that night. “But can I make one request?”
Tanya nodded. “Sure.”
“Can we make a note to discuss you calling me beautiful sometime in the very near future?” As Sophie spoke, a wry smile tugged on her lips.
When she turned her head left, Tanya was reflecting her smile. “We certainly can,” Tanya replied. “I’ve got a lot to say on the matter.”
Then Tanya rolled over and grabbed her phone. “You okay if I set the alarm for 7am? That way, I can go next door and we can get away early.”
“Whatever you need,” Sophie said. “You should get some sleep — you’re going to need to be alert for the dog heist.”
Tanya set her alarm, then lay back down again. “Don’t say that. I’ll have nightmares about it.”
Sophie smiled. “It’s going to be fine — I’m here to back you up, as is Alan.” Then she slipped her hand under the cover and found Tanya’s hand there. She took it in her own and squeezed it tight, not letting it go. “And you won’t have nightmares,” she said. “I’ve got you.”
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Tanya woke up the next morning to the sound of an unfamiliar toilet flushing. She took a few moments to process where she was before reaching over for her phone: 6:55, five minutes before her alarm. When she turned to her right, Sophie was still sound asleep, her hair ruffled, completely relaxed.
Waking up with someone in her bed was a feeling Tanya had forgotten, and it felt good.
With Sophie, it fe
lt right.
She was in deeper than she’d first thought.
The urge to lean over and kiss Sophie’s cheek was almost too strong, but she held back. Tanya should kiss her lips before she kissed her cheek, and she hoped that would happen sooner rather than later.
She slipped out of bed, clambered into her jeans and tiptoed down the stairs. She found Alan in the kitchen in a purple velour dressing gown with matching slippers: exhibit 244. She suppressed a grin as she gave him a hug.
“Morning,” she said, smiling. “When did you turn into Sturby’s answer to Hugh Hefner?”
“Christmas,” Alan replied, matter-of-factly. “Little present to myself, seeing as nobody else is going to buy me anything.”
A stab of guilt hit Tanya in the gut. Every year, Alan sent Tanya a gift voucher for John Lewis, but she only gave him a gift when she saw him over the holidays, which hadn’t been all that often. She made a mental note to change that from now on.
“Sleep well?”
She nodded. “Surprisingly well, thanks.”
He paused, moving his head sideways. “And Sophie seems lovely.”
Tanya grinned: she couldn’t help it. “She is.”
“How long have you been…” Alan asked, leaving the end of the sentence open.
“We’re just friends,” Tanya said, blushing despite herself.
Alan gave her a nod, but the look on his face told her he didn’t believe her.
Tanya flashed back to last night when they’d so nearly crossed the line from friends to more. Then she scrubbed it from her mind. She had bigger things to worry about right now.
“I need to get next door.” She checked her watch: 7:12. “Mum will be up, won’t she?”
Alan nodded. “She’s a 6am woman, rain or shine,” he said, walking over to the kettle. “Can I interest you in a tea or coffee before you go?”
Tanya shook her head. “I want to get this over with as soon as possible, and then we need to get going. Wish me luck.”
