The Ending Series: The Complete Series

by Lindsey Fairleigh

  “He doesn’t like it when you remove his blanket,” I said as I put the coffee grounds back in the cupboard. “I think it’s a comfort thing.”

  Jake raised Everett up to his chest and began to pat his back.

  “He doesn’t like that either; it makes him gassy.”

  Jake frowned. “Well, what does he like?”

  Annie and Sam were laughing at him again, no longer making any attempt to stifle their amusement.

  “You two think this is funny?” Jake said with feigned irritation. When their laughter only grew more boisterous, Jake smiled. “Sabotage,” he grumbled.

  Taking pity on him, I set my coffee mug on the counter and took a step closer. “Here, I’ll take him,” I said.

  With gratitude emanating from him, Jake unloaded the infant into my arms.

  Like usual, I began rocking Everett in a steady swing, instantly taking his screams down to fussy gurgles and grunts. “You know, even though that was probably the most awkward interaction I’ve ever witnessed, it might’ve been the most precious thing I’ve ever seen, too.”

  “Really…” Jake said dryly.

  I nodded and went back to the counter, simultaneously rocking Everett while I grabbed Jake’s cup of coffee. “Here ya go,” I said, handing it to him.

  Collecting my own mug, I held it up to Jake’s. “Bottoms up,” I chirped. All I needed was a few moments to let the caffeine kick in and I’d be ready for another day of nannyhood.

  ~~~~~

  Sitting in one of the rocking chairs on the farmhouse porch and holding a swaddled, contented Ellie, I basked in the early afternoon sunshine, trying not to fall asleep myself.

  Abruptly, the front door was flung open, and Annie scurried out. Sam exited the farmhouse directly after her with a slam of the screen door. Ellie started, but thankfully she didn’t start crying.

  When Sam noticed us tucked away in the corner, his eyes widened. “Sorry, Zoe. I didn’t know you were out here.”

  I nodded down at Ellie. “All the noise and voices inside were making her anxious.”

  Sam walked over, staring down at the baby. “Becca said they’re important.”

  My eyebrows rose. “Did she?”

  He nodded, and I knew Becca must’ve been alluding to more than the sentiment we all had for the babies already.

  “I’m not sure why, but that’s what she said.” Sam gently brushed a wisp of silky, soft hair from Ellie’s forehead, an image of his baby sister flashing through his mind, then he turned and headed back to the porch steps.

  “Where are you two off to?” I asked as I resumed my rocking.

  “We’re gonna play!” Annie sang as she began jumping up and down, clapping her hands.

  I couldn’t help but smile at her enthusiasm. “I wish I could play,” I said. “But I have Ellie duty.”

  Annie’s face scrunched up, and she stopped jumping. “You look too tired to play.”

  The smile fell from my face. “Gee, thanks, Annie.”

  “You should take a nap,” Sam called behind him as he jogged after Annie, who’d done a Tasmanian devil spin and sprinted toward the barn.

  I was tired, but there was little I could do about it. I was still in a constant state of emotional exhaustion—but not physical exhaustion, which was what I missed. It had been three days, and Biggs was already doing better, his mind no longer the toxic mess it had been the first couple of days. But despite his improved mental state, it was still up to Auntie Zoe to tend to most of the twins’ needs, and they didn’t care if I was eating, had my hands in mud, or had just fallen asleep.

  Regardless though, Biggs, Ellie, Everett, and I had found a temporary, affable routine that helped a little bit with my sanity. All it took were a few days of sink-or-swim, trial-and-error situations, and I was settling into my new job title surprisingly well. I understood the twins more—their quirks, their personalities—making it easier to be preemptive with their bottles and their naps and the noises they liked, disliked, and absolutely hated.

  Ellie was the more even-tempered of the two, but whenever she did become fussy, rapidly blinking my eyes and talking to her like she was the cutest little baby in the world and I was going to eat her up seemed to forego complete tears and bloodcurdling screams.

  Everett, on the other hand, was grumpy—a definite crier. He didn’t like to be left alone, and he didn’t like it when Tavis entered the same room as him. Everett also didn’t like his diaper changed or the sound of his sister’s crying or his bottle being too hot or too cold…he didn’t like much of anything. So, as long as I remembered all of that and rocked them both while they were awake, they were content…mostly…sometimes.

  Ellie cooed, and I looked down at her. Her wide blue eyes brightened with the golden glow of the sunset as she watched me, slobbering and mauling her incredibly soft, tiny hand. “We should make a date of this, you and I,” I said, wiping a string of drool from her cheek. “You like sunsets just like your auntie, don’t you?” Ellie’s only response was a grunt and a spastic kick of her feet.

  Hearing approaching footsteps from inside the house, I looked at the screen door just as it opened. Biggs stepped outside onto the whitewashed porch with a small smile on his drawn face as he peered down at Everett, who was nestled in his arms. “Hey, Warden,” he said to me as he lowered himself into the rocking chair beside mine.

  “Not the warden thing again,” I grumbled.

  Biggs shrugged. “Hey, it’s not my nickname for you, it’s your brother’s. I asked him where you were, and he said the ‘warden’ was outside. Did you really kick them out of the dining room earlier?”

  “Of course I did. I was in there with Ellie, minding my own business, and Jason and Harper sauntered in and asked me to draw up a diagram for them.”

  “What’s wrong with that?” Biggs resituated Everett against his chest.

  “Nothing, until they started bickering about projects that need to be done and who needs to do what, and then they woke up the baby.”

  “Oh.”

  “I asked them to leave, nicely,” I added.

  Biggs lifted his eyebrows and tilted his head a little to the left. “Yeah?”

  I rolled my eyes. “Mostly.”

  Biggs smirked and leaned closer to gaze down at Ellie, whose eyes shifted to his lazily before she yawned, making me yawn in turn. “How’s her sneezing today?”

  “She’s doing just fine,” I said. “We soaked up some vitamin D this morning while I was drawing the farm layout for Grayson. If she’s anything like her Auntie Zoe, she’ll be better in no time. Sunshine’ll fix anything.” I offered Biggs a reassuring smile.

  I was so relieved by the fatherly love he now felt for the twins. I was a good enough stand-in for a few days while he got his shit together, but the twins needed their father. He’d finally realized that they were all he had left of Sarah, and Sarah would’ve expected him to step up and love them the way they deserved to be loved.

  “Thank you,” he said quietly, staring out at the farm. Sam and Annie were playing with Jack and Cooper on the overgrown lawn beside the house. “I know you didn’t ask for this role, and I honestly don’t know what would’ve happened to my children if you hadn’t stepped in.” Biggs shook his head. “I’m so ashamed of myself for acting the way that I did. I can’t believe I blamed them…”

  Hearing his self-deprecating speech made me nauseous with guilt. He still had no idea what had really happened. He had no idea that all of this was my fault…mine and Jason’s. “You were a wreck, Biggs. I don’t blame you,” I said. “I loved Sarah, too, and I wanted to help—I want to help you in any way that I can.” I owed him that much.

  Staring down at Ellie, I gave her a big smile and said, “Everything takes time, but we’re getting there…we’ll be just fine.” Ellie’s eyelids began to close, and as I tucked her blanket more tightly around her, I yawned again.

  “You should go get some rest,” Biggs said. “I’ll take them for a bit.”

&n
bsp; I shook the sleepiness from my mind as I covered another yawn with my hand. “I’m not sure why I’m suddenly so tired.” My stomach growled. “And hungry.” I looked at him. “When was the last time anyone ate?”

  Biggs shrugged again, distracted as he bent down and scooped Ellie from my arms.

  Taking my cue, I rose from the rocking chair, stretched, and then groaned, thinking how wonderful it sounded to crawl into bed for a couple hours. But then my stomach growled again. “I guess I’m going to make some lunch before I get any sleep.”

  Biggs nodded. “It’s up to you…you get a free pass for the afternoon.”

  “Thanks, Biggs.” Opening the screen, I padded into the house, hearing scraping and banging in most of the rooms as everyone was getting settled. At least we were finally moved into the farmhouse and had a proper space to take care of the twins.

  Walking into the enormous, bright kitchen, I stopped short. Other than the coffee I’d made sure to unpack and a few boxes of cereal, our food was still in boxes on the moss-green granite island in the center of the room. Without Sarah, it looked like any sort of cooking or culinary organization had completely ceased. Where the hell is Becca? She’d become Sarah’s helper over the months, and I’d expected to find her in the kitchen, organizing and cooking in Sarah’s place. But she wasn’t there, and now that I thought about it, I realized I hadn’t seen her all day.

  If the Farm truly was our new home, we needed to settle in, and if we were going to do that, we needed to reestablish a routine. With so many of us, we needed some sort of schedule; otherwise we’d be so lost in our myriad of to-dos that nothing would ever get done. We needed group meal times and togetherness, and for that we needed a cook. While I was a miserable excuse for one, I was a better choice than some of the others. Hoping Becca would be willing to help me, I decided I would seek her out and beg for her help.

  Searching the ranch, I found everyone busy, in the midst of some chore or another. Mase was chopping firewood near the outdoor brick oven on the lawn area, while Camille stacked the pieces in the storage space beneath it, but there was no sign of Becca. I passed by an old shed, where Jake was wrenching on something, and poked my head inside.

  He glanced up at me. “Hey.”

  I offered him a tired smile. “You hungry?”

  “Always,” he said. I leaned forward, and after he met me halfway, I gave him a peck on the lips. “I’ll find your sister and make us all something to eat.”

  “Sounds good.” He turned his attention back to the machine sitting on the table, and I continued on in my search for Becca.

  I made my way through the stable and then into the storage barn, where I stumbled across Dani as she mucked out the goat pen. I couldn’t help but smile at the sight of her curls escaping from her braid and the dirt smudged on her cheeks.

  “Hey, Zo,” she said, a grunt immediately following as she shoveled old food and manure and wet hay from the ground. “You look like crap.”

  I smiled at her. “Awe. You’re so sweet.”

  Dani barked a laugh. “How are the twins? Are they finally asleep?”

  I tilted my head to the side. “Nope, but I left them with Biggs.” I suddenly remembered how low we were getting on formula. “Oh, I gotta remember to tell H to get more formula next time you guys head into town…we should be fine until then, I think…” My thoughts began to wander.

  Dani stopped shoveling and straightened. Brushing a wisp of hair from her face, she leaned against the shovel she’d wedged into the dirt. “Everything’ll be fine, Zo. You’re doing a great job.” She offered me a reassuring smile.

  “Yeah…” I glanced around at all the clean animal pens. “It looks like you’re making headway. Sorry I haven’t been much help. I’m actually surprised you’ve been able to do so much with Annie running around like the crazy little banshee she is.”

  “Sam’s a lifesaver,” Dani said with an exhausted sigh. I was really proud of her for adapting to the survivor lifestyle as well as she had. I barely remembered the girly, dolled-up Dani I’d known growing up. Our little farm seemed to be giving her a sense of purpose, which I could understand, and I could tell by the revived glint in her eyes that she was happy here.

  “Have you eaten at all?” I asked, wondering how long she’d been working without a break.

  “Umm, no, not really. I sort of forgot.”

  I shook my head. “Tsk. Tsk. It’s nearly noon.”

  Dani’s eyes narrowed, and she cocked her head to the side. “Have you eaten?”

  With a laugh that sounded almost like a sob, I rested my fists on my hips. “Touché, D, touché.” I shook my head. “I’m actually planning on whipping something up for everyone right now. You seen Becca at all?”

  “Nope, but then again, I’ve sorta been in my own world all morning.”

  “Animal chatting?”

  Dani only gave me a guilty smile and wrinkled her nose. “But no drifting, I promise.”

  I nodded. “You’re doing good, D.” I gave her a small, approving smile and turned to go. “I’ll let you know when it’s ready—oh,” I stopped mid-step and turned around again. “Harper set the infirmary up in the master bedroom, so you and Jason get the smaller room downstairs. Is that okay?”

  “Is that the one with the ginormous walk-in closet?”

  I nodded. “You worried you won’t have room for the duffel bag containing the only clothes you own?”

  She gave me a sassy smirk. “No, although it’s past time for a little shopping spree…” Her eyes widened. “Anyway, I was thinking, since Carlos is sleeping in the stable with Vanessa, Annie can stay with me and Jason. I can make the closet into a little room for her.”

  “Sounds good.” I gave her a quick goodbye wave. “I’ll leave you to it.”

  “Thanks, Zo,” she called, and I headed back to the farmhouse. Jogging up the porch steps, I nearly ran into Biggs as he hustled out the front door…without the babies.

  “I thought it was ‘dad time’ with the twins,” I said.

  Biggs shrugged. “Jake needs my help. Harper and Chris took them into the house.”

  I shook my head as he walked toward the shed. “Bullet dodger,” I grumbled.

  Entering through the front door as quietly as I could so as not to disturb any sleeping babies, I walked down the hall to the living room and peeked my head inside. I grinned.

  Chris was cooing at Everett, who gurgled and hiccupped in her arms as she rocked him. Harper was smiling down at Ellie, who was cradled in his lap. With Harper’s dancing eyebrows and too-wide smiles, he was making the goofiest faces at her I’d ever seen on anyone.

  “Have either of you seen Becca?” I whispered.

  Chris glanced up at me and shook her head, a self-satisfied smile brightening her relaxed features. She was completely content. “Not since she moved her stuff up into her room.”

  Harper finally looked at me and shook his head. He was trying his damnedest to keep little Ellie in love with him like all the other ladies, but exhaustion filled his eyes, and I had to stifle a laugh. “She ensnared by your charm yet, H?”

  He gave me a small, cocky smile. “We’re getting there.”

  “Good.” I nodded in the direction of the kitchen. “I’m going to make us something to eat. I’ll let you know when it’s ready.”

  Chris and Harper nodded in tandem and turned their attention back to their charges.

  Assuming Becca was still in her room, I headed back toward the front of the house and up the narrow staircase. The mahogany banister was cool beneath my hand as I ascended, and having grown up with a woodworker for a father, I could appreciate the carpentry that had gone into a house like this—the spindle baluster uprights and Grecian-esque crown molding that came into view as I reached the top of the stairs were just a few of the touches that gave the grand Victorian so much character.

  The oak wood floors were polished, and I could see the pale pink and coffee-colored area rugs scattered purposefully throughout
the second floor through the railing as I approached the landing. Black and white scenic photos of the property hung from the neutral-colored walls. Delicate lace and cream-colored curtains adorned the tall, skinny windows, letting in the early afternoon sunlight, and the minimal, blond wood furniture matched the floors, each piece strategically placed. It was hard to believe dead bodies had been in the house less than a day before we’d settled in, and I was grateful I didn’t know which room had been their final resting place.

  I headed down the hall toward the room I thought now belonged to Becca and the other Re-gens. I passed what I assumed was Chris’s room, given the shotgun propped against the closet door on the far side and the pack that had been left on the bed, and stopped outside the door to Becca’s room.

  I knocked lightly and waited for an answer. Other than the sudden outburst of crying babies downstairs and the old house settling in the growing heat, I didn’t hear anything on the other side of the door. I knocked again.

  “I’ll be out in a minute,” Becca finally rasped from inside, a coughing fit immediately following.

  “Becca, are you okay?”

  Hearing sniffles and another cough, I began to worry. Without hesitation, I turned the handle and pushed the door open.

  The room was mostly dark, the striped beige and chocolate-colored paper lining the walls only visible in the wash of sunlight that filtered in through the parted curtains. Becca sat on the edge of one of the twin beds, a sea of bloodied tissues on the floor and around her impression on the mattress.

  “Becca?” My heart thudded, and I felt the color drain from my face as I rushed over to her. “What’s wrong?” I searched her face for answers, her body for some indication of what was wrong, but I didn’t know what to look for.

  Her shoulders were slouched and her feet were dangling haplessly over the edge of the bed.

  “Becca, what’s wrong? Do you want me to get Harper?”

  Slowly, she shook her head. “He can’t help me.”

  I didn’t like the sound of that. I scanned her body again. At some point over the past few weeks she’d grown thinner, and her eyes were rimmed with dark circles.