Take My Dress Off

by S. Gilmour

  “Are you cold, baby?” he whispered, wrapping his arms around me. He pressed his lips to the top of my head.

  I lifted my chin to look up at him. “This is exactly what’s pissing me off, Dillon.”

  “What?”

  “This. When I start to fall for you again you pull back. When I pull away you’re right back at me again. You can’t keep doing this to me. It’s not fair.”

  He looked down to me and tightened his arms around my waist. “I care about you a lot, Paige, you know that.”

  “Does Jordan know?”

  “She’s not here.” He cupped my cheeks with his cold hands and leaned down to kiss me. I pushed out of his embrace.

  “You need to make a choice. I’m not playing this game with you anymore.”

  “It’s complicated, Paige.”

  “Really?” My voice was rising. “I don’t think it is.” My heart was pounding and I knew Chaz must have been wondering why I hadn’t yet returned. The last thing I needed was for him to see me like this. I had to get away from Dillon.

  “Forget it,” I said and turned away.

  “Paige. Wait.”

  “I have to go.” I didn’t wait for his reply. I didn’t turn around. I didn’t want to see him standing there convincing me to stay because he was really good at that. Somehow my walk turned from a jog to a sprint. I scanned the parking lot for the Mustang. It was still pretty crowded. Where did we park? I ran into Chaz’s friend Spade and he pointed me in the right direction. Chaz was leaning up against his car talking to Donny. They were standing very close and I thought maybe they were concealing another joint. Donny was still in his costume and looked ridiculous now that the excitement of the evening had faded.

  “Finally,” said Chaz as I approached them. “I thought you were lost!”

  “We were about to send out the troops,” smiled Donny.

  “I ran into a few friends.” It was sort of true, right?

  “You seen Dillon?” asked Donny. “I gotta get going.”

  “Umm…” I stalled. “I think I saw him by the restrooms earlier.”

  “Thanks. See you guys tomorrow.” Donny disappeared into a sea of cars.

  Chaz and I chatted about the movie as he drove me home. Then we were in my driveway. I didn’t know what to do. Would he try to kiss me? Was this just a friendly movie date or a real date? Should I hop over the car door? I took off my pumps and tossed them over the door and onto the driveway.

  “Hold on, I’ll get you out properly.” He slid from the seat. He came around to the other side of the car as I stood, my bare feet sinking into the old vinyl seat. He helped me over the car door and when I was safely on the ground he leaned against the car and took me into his arms. “I’ll walk you to the door, it’s the least I can do after taking your virginity,” he winked.

  “This joke dies after tonight, okay? Promise?”

  “Cross my heart,” he grinned. He tightened his arms around me, leaned down, and pressed his lips to mine very softly, very slowly. I was smoldering under Chaz’s patient touch and relieved he was holding onto me because my legs were turning into wet noodles. It was the softest kiss I’d ever had. Dillon always shoved his tongue down my throat as quickly as possible. “You better get some sleep,” he whispered. “Big day tomorrow.”

  “Today,” I corrected.

  “True.”

  I reluctantly parted from him and picked up my pumps. He walked me to the door. Luckily for me it was unlocked because I had forgotten my keys. I stepped into the doorway. There was a soft glow coming from the kitchen. I wanted to invite Chaz in and sneak him into my room but I knew it was too soon for that.

  “Thanks. I had so much fun tonight.”

  “I’m glad.” Chaz leaned in for one last kiss which I happily returned.

  “Good night.” He gave me a sleepy smile and cocked his head. “See you tomorrow.” He turned and walked back to his car. I closed the door and leaned against it, the vibration of his car rumbling against my back and my heart.

  Chapter Four

  In less than twelve hours we were all together again, magically transformed into superstars with makeup and hairspray, standing backstage and waiting for our cue. Donny had his signature black eyeliner thickly rimming his lids. His hair had been sprayed and shellacked into a mohawk and he was bejeweled with chain necklaces and studded ears. He walked around clapping, pumping everyone up, his black fingernails keeping time as Frankie Goes to Hollywood’s Relax boomed in the background. I leaned against the wall, barely able to breathe in a tight, yellow, strapless, Rampage dress. My long hair was teased and sprayed into a high ponytail pulling ferociously from my crown so tightly I was about to cry. Some of the girls were jumping up and down holding hands. The guys were pale and quiet.

  I glanced to my left. Danielle was staring at the floor. Her dark curls were streaked with blue and fell against her shoulders. Her bright pink lips twitched. She always got super nervous before we went up on the stage. She smoothed the neon green tutu over her black fishnet leggings. “This thing itches like a bitch!”

  Chaz was next to her fidgeting with zippers at the cuffs of his black leather jacket, his golden locks blow-dried and gelled perfectly off his face. His lids were coated in shiny copper making his sea green eyes even larger. I glanced to my right at Dillon. He looked drop-dead gorgeous and as usual took my breath away. Dillon’s hair was teased and tousled in all directions. His eyes were lightly lined and his lashes darkened with mascara. All the guys hated having to wear make-up (well, except for Donny) but knew it was necessary. A shorter, stockier version of his brother, Dillon was just as handsome but he was quiet and pensive. Donny had a playful, flirty personality that rendered him approachable, Dillon the dark and brooding one. Of course I had to go for the dark and brooding one. Why couldn’t he be more like his brother? Donny always appeared to be having a good time and he possessed a confidence that was not intimidating.

  Dillon glanced down to me and gently ran his hand down the length of my ponytail, giving it a quick tug at the end.

  “Are we good?” he asked, his eyes softening.

  I tried to take a deep breath, “Sure.”

  “Good.” He grabbed my hand and raised it to his mouth, lightly brushing my knuckles against his lips. “Let’s do this.”

  “Showtime, ladies and gentleman!” shouted Rory from behind the curtain.

  “Break a leg, guys!” added Donny.

  The show went smoothly. I let go of my frustration with Dillon and enjoyed myself. Chaz turned the wrong way during the Michael Jackson dance, Danielle cursed, and I tried not to laugh. Dillon was amazing as usual and the girls called and cheered whenever he strutted down the runway. I got lost in the music and the clothes and when I was on the runway with the lights blinding my eyes, the music pounding beneath my toes, everything slipped away and I felt like the only girl in the world. I looked into the distance over the audience, not noticing anyone, only aware of how empowered I felt as I commanded everyone’s attention.

  We strutted through the sets and caught our breath while a pair of Rory’s professional dancers performed to Asia’s Only Time Will Tell. Everyone’s eyes sparkled with adrenalin as Maddie came backstage to tell us how great we were all doing.

  “Almost Paradise is up next,” shouted Rory. “Paige, Dillon, you’re up first. As soon as you finish the first verse the dancers enter stage right.” She yelled behind the curtain. “Get the piano player up there now!”

  “You ready?” grinned Dillon, his dark eyes gleaming.

  I rolled my eyes. “Ready as I’ll ever be, I guess.”

  Dillon was wearing a black suit, an electric blue skinny tie, and a black shirt. Why did he have to be so beautiful? I had on a matching blue, floor length, Jessica McClintock Gunne Sax dress. It had layers of crinolines and puffed out at the sides. It was ridiculous and Dillon had to help me hold it to get up the stairs.

  “We should have practiced with this dress,” he groaned with an armload
of crinoline as we climbed the shaky, metal staircase. We walked out to the side of the stage and took our places and our microphones. Thank God they were turned off! The audience looked puzzled as the piano player took his seat. He was going to play along with the track.

  Dillon closed his eyes and took a breath. He was actually nervous!

  He never got nervous.

  Which made me nervous.

  The intro began. He slowly raised the microphone up to his mouth. As he began the first verse he picked up my hand and gazed into my eyes. He was really turning it on. I could hear his voice, he was actually singing to me.

  My turn.

  I looked up into his adoring eyes and then I fell. Not physically off the stage but I fell in love with him all over again and decided I was going to be for these three minutes and fifty- one seconds. Screw his flirting, screw his girlfriend, screw my own insecurities. This was my last chance to feel anything with him and I was going to enjoy it. He slid his hand around my waist and I gazed up at him dreamily as he pulled me to him. I could feel his heart beating against my chest and sweat glistened above his full lips. I snaked one hand around his neck, leaned into him, and we began to move. We slowly rocked back and forth as we declared our love to this sappy song and the audience loved it. He slowly twirled me around then turned me back against him, his hand flat on my stomach as he pressed into my backside. I leaned my head back against his chest and continued to rock with him. When the short musical interlude came he swung me around and set me on top of the piano, the blue dress puffing all around me. I crossed my legs, shoved down the crinolines, and continued to sing as the models paraded down the runway. When we finished the last verse he swept me down from the piano and into his arms. He lowered his head to mine. Oh my God! Was he going to kiss me on this stage in front of everyone? He pressed his forehead to mine as we held the last word then softly brushed his lips across mine before pulling away. The audience began to applaud as I melted into the stage. I looked to the side. Danielle was staring, jaw dropped, her hand in Chaz’s. He was glaring at Dillon as she pulled him from the stage. Once everyone had exited, Dillon grabbed my hand and escorted me to the stairs. I turned back and looked out to the audience. Dillon’s girlfriend, Jordan, was talking casually with her friends. Did she know he was going to do this? Did he already explain that it was not a big deal, just part of the show?

  Dillon helped me get the cumbersome dress down the stairs, sweeping me from the last three steps and setting me down gently. He held me tightly to him for a moment then slowly exhaled as his hands slipped from my body, his eyes the last to let go as he turned and walked toward the dressing room. I stared after him, my body reeling from his affection and sudden absence. I walked past the other models as they hooted and cheered, some made cat calls.

  Donny blocked my path. “That was so rad! You two were amazing! When did you come up with that?”

  I didn’t even know what that was.

  “We did what you wanted Donny, we made it work,” I replied absently. I had to find Dillon, I had to talk to him. I made my way down the hallway. A hand yanked my shoulder back.

  “What in the hell?” cried Danielle. “I thought you guys were going to do it on the piano!” she laughed. Chaz stood stiffly next to her loosening his hot pink tie.

  “That’s ridiculous. As if, Danielle!”

  “Is there something going on I don’t know about?” she teased and winked.

  “Nothing is going on, just playing it up for the crowd, right?”

  “Looked pretty real to me,” Chaz said flatly.

  I looked past his shoulder to see if Dillon was coming out of the dressing room. “Don’t make anything of it. Jordan was right there watching too.”

  “I bet she wants to kick your ass.”

  “That’s not funny, Danielle. Excuse me. I need to get this horrible dress off.”

  I pushed through the human wall of people and made my way to the dressing room. It was alive with energy as models stripped off garments and make-up. A black curtain divided the guy’s and girl’s sides. I glanced to the other side of the curtain. The male models were in various stages of undress. I felt my throat tighten when I saw Dillon wearing only black briefs as he hung up his clothes. I remembered his body pressed to mine, other parts of him pressed to me, his hands on my stomach, his soft lips. Damn him for doing this to me again!

  “Hey, you keep staring and I’m going to charge you,” warned one of the models.

  Dillon looked over to see who was talking, raised his dark eyebrows at me, and then turned his attention back to folding his pants.

  “Alright, sweetie, move along. I needed that dress back like five minutes ago.” Ramon the wardrobe assistant handed me an empty hanger.

  I quickly changed and handed the dress off to Ramon. When I exited the dressing room a hand caught my shoulder. I turned to find Jordan with a few of her friends. Could this day get any worse?

  “Paige,” she smiled. Her beady brown eyes didn’t change shape to reflect she was smiling. Like if she was crying or furiously chasing me with an axe they would stay their same small, beady, shape.

  “Oh my God! You two were so cute up there!” she said squeezing my hand as if I was eight years old and had just finished a vocal performance of Tomorrow in my parent’s formal living room.

  “Is Dillon still back there? I didn’t see him come out.”

  “I think so.” I didn’t relay to her that I had just gawked at her boyfriend in his underwear.

  I would love to say that this ended like a John Hugh’s movie. That I walked out of the convention center and Dillon was waiting for me, leaning up casually against a red Porsche 911. (Cue music). That he looked up to me through his tousled bangs, caught my gaze, a lazy smile traveling across his lips as he coolly tossed his hair and motioned me over to him.

  But no, that’s not how it ended.

  Chaz picked me up in his old Mustang. I climbed over the door and slid onto the faded, cracked, vinyl seat. We rode over in silence (except for The Smith’s How Soon is Now? blasting over the engine’s roar) to the “after party” at the Holiday Inn Cantina.

  I tried to join in on the festive mood and celebrate a great performance but I don’t think I was fooling anyone. Not Danielle who occasionally nudged me barking, “Snap out of it!” and I was definitely not fooling Chaz. I occasionally caught him watching me from a booth, sitting across from Donny. He sipped slowly on a margarita, absently staring in my direction with a look that bounced between pity and longing.

  Dillon wasn’t there. Donny said he had gone off with Jordan and her friends.

  Of course he had.

  I heard that Dillon and Jordan broke up a few days later. Donny told Maddie that Dillon was going to take some time off from modeling because of the demands of summer training for varsity football. Which was just fine with me.

  Chapter Five

  Despite the dramatic send off to summer I was able to let go of the bullshit with Dillon and enjoy spending time with Chaz. He became a regular with Maddie and we modeled together at the mall and in shows for local boutiques. Since Dillon was out of the picture, Chaz was now my partner and my regular “prom date” in bridal shows and we were affectionately referred to as “The Barbie Dolls” by the boutiques. It was so nice working with someone who didn’t play mind games like Dillon. Better yet, Chaz didn’t have a girlfriend I had to worry about.

  My agent Theresa loved him too. Chaz and Danielle had tagged along with me for an audition at the agency in L.A. Theresa took one look at Chaz and signed him that afternoon.

  As summer came to a close, Danielle, Donny, Chaz, and I were booked for a hair convention in Anaheim. I was especially excited for this trip because Maddie didn’t have to come with us since I was over eighteen now and didn’t need a chaperone.

  “Jesus, where in the hell is the van?” called Donny from the wrought iron bench that was holding him up. It was much too early for anyone to be up, especially Donny (who, knowing Donav
an Hunter very well, had probably quit partying about an hour ago).

  “Holy shit!” exclaimed Danielle when the sleek black limousine pulled up to the curb at our meeting spot, the Hotel Encanto. The agency was sending a car to drive us from Vista to Anaheim but we usually traveled in a big van, we didn’t expect a limo! We slid in and settled into the plush seats. Donny picked up the champagne that was chilling in the console.

  “Here’s to two hours of riding in style.” He popped the cork. Danielle grabbed the glasses and we toasted.

  “I’ve never had champagne before,” I said and took a sip.

  “I have,” Chaz said as he studied the golden bubbly liquid. “At my sister’s wedding. It gave me a headache.”

  “Maddie always gets it for her New Year’s Eve party,” I said.

  “Of course she does,” smirked Donny.

  “Take it slow,” Danielle cautioned. “Believe me, it can

  give you a wicked hangover.”

  “C’mon you wussy,” Donny said and kicked Chaz’s foot. “Bottom’s up.” Donny threw back his champagne as Danielle and I sipped slowly. Donny refilled his glass and threw that back too.

  “Grab that bottle, Paige,” called Danielle. “Donny’s going to finish it before we even make it to the freeway,” she laughed. I passed it to her and she tucked it between us.

  “Fuckin’ A!” yelled Donny. He clapped his hands then fiddled with the radio dials in the mahogany console. “Let’s get this party started, boys and girls!” Duran Duran filled our small space and we raised our glasses and danced in our seats. We toasted to being young, to freedom, and to Simon Le bon. Donny lasted another ten minutes before he collapsed against Chaz’s shoulder, his empty glass falling along with his hand to the floor.

  “What a light weight,” Danielle giggled.

  “To his credit we were partying all night.” Chaz crawled across to our seat, scooting in between Danielle and me, allowing Donny the whole bench seat to stretch out his long frame. “We got in at like four AM. I think I got about two hours of sleep but he was too amped up.”