Take My Dress Off

by S. Gilmour

  Kind of sexy.

  But mostly scary.

  I leaned against my car and watched him settle, his breathing slowing. I thought about what Danielle had said earlier, about staying away from Dillon. Maybe she was right.

  Chaz leaned in and kissed me quickly. He said he needed to get home and help his mom. Part of me was relieved that our evening was ending. Chaz seemed distant and aloof and it made my self-doubt go into overdrive. But I was also disappointed. I had wanted to talk to him about more than school or fashion shows. I had hoped we would discuss our relationship. After last night I knew things had changed for us. Danielle said sex always did that to relationships and for me it hadn’t turned out well in the past. I don’t know what I expected, I guess reassurance.

  Chapter Twelve

  I returned home right before Maddie arrived from work and started the chores I was supposed to have done last night. She began chatting about the holiday fashion show and getting her to-do lists ready. (She had forgotten I was grounded and I didn’t remind her).

  “Have you talked to Dillon recently?” she asked as she scrolled through her phone list, her reading glasses perched precariously on the tip of her slender nose.

  “I have a class with him. Why?”

  “Is he planning on being in the Holiday Show?”

  “How would I know?” I snapped and started unloading the dishwasher. The last thing I needed was for Dillon to be in the show.

  “You’re still fighting with Dillon?”

  “I’m not anything with him.” I started throwing forks into the drawer.

  She stared disapprovingly as I assaulted the flatware. “What’s going on, Paige?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Then why are you trashing my dishes?”

  I turned around and glared. I really didn’t know. I could feel the anger spreading through my muscles. I was going to shatter. Like I wanted to shatter these dishes. But I definitely couldn’t talk about Chaz with Maddie. She didn’t take our relationship seriously mostly because she believed Dillon and I belonged together.

  “It’s been a long day,” I began. “I’m not used to getting up early again. Guess I’m grouchy.”

  “Teenagers,” sighed Maddie. “Can you ask Dillon tomorrow?”

  “Do I have to? I’d rather not.”

  “Fine. Bring me the phone.”

  I handed it to her. “Oh God, are you calling him?”

  “Two-seven-four-seven-four-two-nine,” she sang as she dialed then tapped her red nails against the tile counter as she waited. I could hear ringing… then a male voice.

  “Hi, Donovan.” She doodled daisies on her list as she chatted.

  I went back to the dishes, fuming.

  “That’s fine. Tell him to think about it and he can let Paige know.”

  I slammed the dishwasher shut.

  “Yes, next Tuesday, seven PM at the studio.”

  More doodling and nail tapping.

  “Tell Chaz too then.” She bid her goodbye and scrawled on her list.

  “Tell Chaz what?” I asked.

  “Oh, so you’re talking to me again…” she said not looking up from her list.

  “I never stopped talking to you. What’s going on?”

  She looked up over her glasses. “Dillon will let you know tomorrow. He needs to check with his coach about missing a few practices. Chaz was there so Donovan confirmed with him.”

  “Chaz is there?” I asked. “He said he was going home,” I said before I caught myself.

  “You saw him today?”

  “After school. Just for a little while.” I wanted to call Donny back and ask him to put Chaz on the phone, ask him why he lied to me. He was at Spade’s after school, now Donny’s after our brief dinner? What happened to helping his mom?

  Was he avoiding me? Was he having regrets?

  As soon as I was alone I called Danielle.

  “Are you turning into one of those stalker girlfriends?”

  “I don’t like being lied to.”

  “Technically he didn’t lie to you. He just didn’t tell you. Does he have to have your permission before he does anything?”

  “No, of course not.”

  “Then relax. You’re getting crazy just like you did with Brit.”

  “This isn’t the same situation,” I said quickly, the pitch of my voice rising. “And I wasn’t crazy,” I added, feeling the need to defend myself.

  “You drove by Brit’s house like fifty times in one day.”

  “It wasn’t fifty. Maybe like five. Or ten.”

  “Whatever. Quit being a spaz. Get your mind off it. Take a bath or go watch TV or something.”

  So I did.

  And fell asleep.

  I was awakened by a light rapping on my window. I walked over and peeked through the metal mini-blinds.

  Chaz was outside!

  “Oh my God!” I opened the window. “Chaz, what are you doing here? What time is it?”

  “Two-thirty.” He popped the screen off the window and climbed in.

  “Ever heard of a door?” I whispered as he closed the window behind him.

  “Didn’t want to wake Maddie,” he whispered back. He leaned back against the window ledge and grinned.

  “Why didn’t you call?”

  “Didn’t want to wake Maddie.” He leaned in to kiss me.

  “Nothing wakes Maddie,” I grinned. “She could sleep through a hurricane.”

  “Hurricane, huh?” Chaz stepped toward me, his arms circling my waist as his eyes lowered, his gaze traveling from my t-shirt that barely covered my ass to my bare legs. His face lowered to my cheek, inhaling slowly as he nuzzled against me. “You smell like vanilla,” he whispered against my skin and fingered my damp hair. I molded my body against his. Desperate hands caressed my backside and roamed under my t-shirt, the faint smell of marijuana clinging to his linen jacket.

  “I can’t sleep. I keep seeing my dad lying there on the grass. I couldn’t help him, Paige.” The words stuck in his throat and his face twisted in pain. “I just stood there and watched his life slip out of him,” he sobbed.

  I clung tighter to him. He cried and it stilled me. I didn’t say anything, there was nothing I could say to ease his pain. He held me tightly against him, his breathing staggered. He slipped out of his jacket and slowly backed me up onto my bed. He lowered himself on top of me and I felt his lips first then his tongue as I fisted through is hair. My senses shot into high alert. His hands slipped under the band of my shorts and explored. Eager fingers intimately teased as I burned around him, gasping with restrained silence as the heat tightened and tore through me. I reached between his legs and fumbled with the buttons of his jeans. He was hard and sprung free, pressing into my thigh.

  “Oh God, Paige,” he sighed. “I need you.”

  “I don’t have any rubbers,” I whispered.

  “My wallet.”

  My hands roamed up the back of his thighs to the hard square in his back pocket. I fingered through it, feeling for the packet. I held it up to Chaz and he tore it open with his teeth.

  “Put it on.”

  I reached down and stretched the rubber ring over the top of him. I tried to pull it down but it kept slipping off. Chaz tightened his hand over mine, guiding me as we rolled it down his length together. He slipped his hands underneath me, cupping my cheeks as he urged me onto him. His muscles tensed and he buried himself in me in one urgent thrust. I lifted my hips up to meet his and pressed my lips against his throat. He was deep inside me and I could barely breathe, the tension building and swelling. I struggled to keep up as his hips surged and rolled into me, his demanding pace pushing me to my limits with pleasure and pain. I stifled a cry and bit into his shoulder as I bucked beneath him, overwhelmed by how fast I fell apart. Before I had a chance to recover he pulled out and flipped me over, pinning my wrists over my head as he rocked into me with just as much momentum as before. My face pressed into the pillows and I struggled to breathe as he held
me beneath him, his thighs spreading mine apart, his arms caging me on either side.

  “Fuck!” He collapsed on top of my back. I tried to adjust myself under his crushing weight, my breasts crammed painfully into the mattress as he sucked my neck. I squirmed and tried to wriggle out from under him.

  Chaz released my arms and shifted us both to our sides, curling around my back. I could still feel him inside of me, one hand cupping my breast, the other around my waist. I looked back over my shoulder, I needed to see him, see his desire for me shining in his eyes.

  What I saw was a guy starting to fall asleep.

  “Chaz.”

  “Hmm…”

  “Are you sleeping?”

  “Mmm…”

  “You can’t stay here.”

  “So tired…don’t sleep anymore.”

  I started to pull away from him.

  “Don’t.”

  He pinched my hips then reached down to where we were still joined and carefully withdrew. He squinted as he looked over my shoulder to the small nightstand.

  “Tissue.”

  I gave it to him and he wrapped up the evidence of our tryst.

  “You can’t leave that here.”

  “Relax…” he whispered. He dropped it down next to my bed. “C’mere.”

  I snuggled into his chest.

  “What time does Maddie get up?”

  “Six-thirty.”

  “Wake me up at five-thirty…she’ll never know I was here,” he said, drifting.

  “I don’t know, Chaz, it’s pretty risky.”

  “Riskier if I drive...”

  I set the alarm and settled into Chaz’s embrace. I couldn’t believe he was in my bed! He quickly fell asleep in deep even breaths, his arms relaxing around me. I drifted off to sleep as well, my heart still fluttering from the excitement of our clandestine lovemaking.

  When the alarm chimed at five-thirty Chaz was already gone. The screen was back on the window and there was no sign that he had ever been here. I began to wonder if it had been a dream, until I saw the wadded up tissue next to my bed.

  Chapter Thirteen

  I ENTERED Algebra Two with a heavy heart. I didn’t intend on sharing any details of my midnight rendezvous with Danielle. I felt strange about withholding it from her but I wanted to keep it to myself without her commentary, wit, or judgment.

  I still didn’t know how I felt about it.

  Chaz had been so vulnerable, so raw, yet so commanding. I had never been with someone who took charge of my body like he did. He knew exactly what he wanted, what I needed, and it was exciting and hot but a little frightening at the same time. When I was with him I felt like I was absorbed by him, slipping away from myself. Danielle would probably think I had been too accommodating last night. She would either chastise or congratulate me and I didn’t want to find out which it would be.

  Danielle and Dillon were chatting when I walked in. She was leaning forward and he was leaning backward, his red Converse sneakers draped casually on top of my chair. I was surprised to see her toss her head back and laugh. She usually rolled her eyes or glared when he talked.

  “Well…look who decided to come to class today,” sang Danielle as I kicked Dillon’s feet from my chair and sat down. The bell rang and I opened my binder.

  “Alright gang,” said Mr. Haines pulling the door shut. “That’s the second bell, settle down.”

  Class was painfully boring and I found it hard to keep my mind on anything but the memory of Chaz’s hands on my body, his smooth skin, the powerful way he took me last night. When we were told to get into partner groups Dillon walked over to Sloane’s desk and Danielle moved her seat next to me.

  “New partners, people. Mr. Hunter, get with Miss Hanson,” called Mr. Haines. “Miss Russo, cop a squat with the lovely Miss Pierce.”

  “Awesome,” said Danielle, a fake smile plastered on her face as she scooted her chair away. Dillon sat back down in his chair, hooked his feet under my chair and dragged me toward him. He glanced at my worksheet.

  “You didn’t even do the problems.”

  “I know. Do them for me.”

  “As if,” he grinned and pushed his paper across the desk toward me. “Copy it.”

  I started jotting down the answers.

  “Now, Miss Hanson, you’re not going to learn by copying others,” Dillon said in a stern voice.

  “Whatever.” I kept copying, keeping a watchful eye on Mr. Haines’ location as he wandered around the room.

  “Tired?” Dillon asked with a smirk. “Have a late night visitor?”

  I stopped writing and lifted my eyes to his. They were dark, questioning.

  “Cut the shit, Paige. Chaz said he was heading to your house when he left last night.”

  I tried to keep my composure but I was screaming inside my head. I didn’t want anyone knowing that Chaz had come over, especially Dillon. I looked over to Danielle, she was explaining in exaggerated hand gestures to Sloane who stared back at her blankly.

  I decided to play dumb. “Chaz was at your house last night?” I asked calmly and started writing again.

  “Yes.” His penetrative gaze studied my reaction.

  “What were you doing?” I kept writing.

  “Playing Atari with some of Donny’s college buddies.”

  “Getting high…” I added.

  “Maybe.”

  I pushed his paper back to him. “Your parents don’t care?”

  “No, they’re in New Zealand.” Dillon stuck his pencil through the hole of his paper and twirled it around.

  “How are we doing here, guys?” Mr. Haines snatched Dillon’s paper from his pencil. His eyes quickly swept over it before clipping it onto his clip board. He scanned my paper and handed it back to me.

  “Okay, folks. Back to your seats,” he shouted. He began walking up and down the rows passing out worksheets to students at random. When he got to our row he handed one to Sloane, skipped Danielle and Dillon and handed one to me.

  “If you don’t have a worksheet you’re off the hook tonight. If you have one you’ve got homework. Adios guys.”

  “Karma’s a bitch,” laughed Dillon as he walked past me.

  “Don’t worry,” called Danielle. “I’ll help you.”

  “I didn’t say I wouldn’t help her,” Dillon slipped an arm around Sloane. He looked back at us over his shoulder. “All she has to do is ask…” He turned back around and Sloane slipped her hand into the back pocket of his jeans but not before shooting me a death glare.

  “Sloane’s so pathetic,” hissed Danielle. “And stupid. I don’t know how she got into A2, she’s a complete moron. I think I want to kick her tiny little ass.”

  Sloane’s long, shiny, ponytail bounced as we trailed behind her and Dillon.

  “I want to cut off her ponytail and shove it down her throat.” I really didn’t. But I was so mad at Dillon I had to take it out on someone.

  “Jesus, Paige! Way to take it to the next level. Although I can’t imagine that’s the first thing she’s ever gagged on,” Danielle snorted.

  After sixth period history I was beat. I pushed my way through the noisy crowds of B wing to the main locker hall. It was only the first week of school and the excitement of seeing old friends and wearing new outfits had already worn off. Summer had slipped away and conceded to the endless boredom of school.

  If that wasn’t bad enough, Dillon was leaning against my locker spinning the dial of the lock. He tossed back his dark hair as he moved through the combination. The metal door sprang open and he caught the books as they started to fall out.

  “How did you do that?”

  “You’re still using your birthday as your combo, duh.” He took my books from me and shoved them into the locker. Then he grabbed my A2 book. “You’re gonna need this,” he chuckled, handing it to me. His fingers grazed against mine and I felt those stupid butterflies I told myself I’d never let him make me feel again. Why butterflies? I loved Chaz. I’d slept wit
h him two nights in a row for God’s sake. Why did Dillon still weaken my knees? Maybe Danielle would know. She had probably read an article about it in one of her magazines.

  “What do you want, Dillon?”

  His eyes lowered to mine, the corners of his full lips curling into a smile. I had to get away from him before those old feelings started to simmer. “I gotta go.” I turned to walk away and he grabbed my elbow.

  “C’mon, I’ll walk with you.” He draped his arm casually around my shoulder. “Since it’s been so hot in the afternoons Coach moved our practices to mornings,” he said as he kept in step with me. “Tell Maddie that I can do the Holiday Show and I’ll be at the meeting next week.”

  “Awesome.” My response dripped with sarcasm.

  Dillon playfully swatted my butt and sprinted off. The feelings that had been returning were immediately halted in their tracks.

  Danielle was right.

  Asswipe.

  ***

  Danielle and I had planned to tackle my A2 homework at her house after school. Of course with Danielle things were never that simple.

  “Everyone’s going to Rocket’s,” she said as we waited in a long line of exhaust and thumping music to get out of the school parking lot. “Let’s cruise by and get a snack before tackling homework.” She rolled down the passenger window. “Is your air conditioning broken?”

  “It takes a while. Keep your panties on.”

  “Speaking of panties coming off…” she grinned. “Did you ever hear back from Chaz last night?”

  “Yes, he called,” I lied and silently prayed that Dillon would keep his stupid mouth shut.

  “And?”

  “And…we had a conversation, like most people do when they’re on the phone.”

  “Smart ass.” Danielle took out her lipstick and flipped down the visor. She washed her lips in bright red.

  “Red? On a Tuesday afternoon, Danielle?” I raised my eyebrows and pumped the gas. We were finally out onto the main road.

  “You never know when you’ll run into the man of your dreams,” she grinned and slammed the cap onto her lipstick tube. “Especially the way you drive.”

  “Very funny. Since we’re talking about men…I have a question for you.”