Steel Rain: A Military Romance Collection

by A. Gorman

  “I’d be perfectly happy with another cone that was bracketed by a blown tire and a thrown rod.” Bernadette cocked her head and looked regretful. “I would invite you in…”

  “Nadi, it’s four in the morning, and I have to get into the office at nine. There is absolutely no reason for you to apologize for not asking me in.” Gavin sighed. “Though I would love to come in, and if we were at my place, I’d do the same.”

  “Let’s just call this a regulation date that ended in regulation disappointment.”

  Gavin tuned and stared at her. “Make you sure you stamp it five times.”

  Bernadette’s eye lit up. “Stamp it, file it, oh yeah.”

  “You…like Futurama?”

  “I don’t know that my life has meaning without it.”

  She laughed. “Okay, on that alone you get a second date.” Without hesitation, she leaned in and gave him a quick peck on the lips.

  She still tasted like strawberry ice cream. Their eyes caught, and Gavin leaned into her, slipping a hand up into her hair, amazed by the satiny softness as he brought her lips back to his. The kiss was gentle, sweet, and he kept any inference of demand out of it. He just wanted to kiss her, to remember her flavor for the rest of the night. And Bernadette didn’t object. In fact, she leaned in and joined him, their essence fusing in a tangle of lips and tongues.

  Slowly, Bernadette pulled back. “Gavin. You have work in four hours and still, have to drive home.”

  “I hate being a responsible adult,” he mumbled, still memorizing her taste.

  “Second date, Gavin. Let’s both get some sleep.”

  “I still don’t want to be a responsible adult.”

  “You can be irresponsible next time when your car hasn’t thrown a rod.”

  He bounced his head against the headrest. “Shit. I have to go car shopping tomorrow.”

  “See?”

  “Do I get to walk you to the door?”

  “If you walk to that door, I’m liable to either ask you in or spend entirely too much time giving you a kiss goodnight.”

  He heaved a sigh. “Fair enough. But next time, we’re going to make out point, and I’m not planning anything else.”

  Bernadette dropped a quick kiss on his lips. “Fair deal.” She opened the door and carefully climbed out of the car. Gavin realized her ankle was really bothering her, and he hoped that wasn’t his fault between the tire, the ice cream, the blown engine, and bushes. She leaned down and smiled at him through the window. “Thank you, Gavin. It was a very interesting first date.”

  “I’m just glad it’s not our only date.”

  “Good night, Gav.”

  “Good night, Nadi.”

  He waited while she hobbled up the front walk to the door, and let herself in. As the door closed behind her, he realized just how tired he really was. He had to get home—and it would probably be smart to just call out sick tomorrow. He had to deal with insurance and buying a new car. It wasn’t something he wanted to do after a long day of dealing with the store.

  Still, he got the second date. That made him happy. And from what he could tell, Nadi had been more amused than anything. It was a decent consolation prize, as he pulled away from the curb to head home.

  Chapter Five

  HURRICANE GARY FORECAST/ADVISORY NUMBER 10

  FOR NAMED TROPICAL STORM

  NWS NATIONAL HURRICANE CENTER MIAMI FL

  2100 UTC TUE SEP 12 20XX

  CHANGES IN WATCHES AND WARNINGS WITH THIS ADVISORY...

  THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE HAS ISSUED A HURRICANE WATCH FOR THE EAST COAST OF MAINLAND US FROM CAPE HATTERAS TO CAPE COD. SUMMARY OF WATCHES AND WARNINGS IN EFFECT...

  A HURRICANE WATCH IS IN EFFECT FOR...

  *CAPE HATTERAS TO CAPE COD*

  *THE WATERS OF THE CHESAPEAKE*

  *COASTAL WATERS UP TO 100 MILES INLAND*

  A HURRICANE WARNING MEANS THAT HURRICANE CONDITIONS ARE EXPECTED SOMEWHERE WITHIN THE WARNING AREA...IN THIS CASE WITHIN THE NEXT WEEK.”

  “Did you order all the supplies?”

  Gavin nodded as if Mister Homes on the other end could actually see him. He cleared his throat and changed tack. “Yes, I did. I made sure that I did. It looks like this storm is steaming up the coast.”

  The deep sigh through the phone said everything it needed to. “We don’t need this. There is still massive damage from Sandy.”

  “There is. I agree with you, we don’t need this. I can hope this is less than a Cat Two, and we just have power out and minor flooding.” Gavin didn’t even want to think about the damage that had been wrought by the last storm, and now they were talking about another one.

  Worse, he was having trouble paying attention to the weather. It was only when Homes had emailed him the information that he had realized that he wasn’t paying attention. And in the heart of hurricane season, working in home improvement store, he had to.

  He knew what happened, though. In the week since he dropped Bernadette off, there had been one day of serious texting, even some sexting, and then it disappeared. She didn’t answer emails, she wouldn’t answer her phone or return his messages. It was like she had fallen off the face of the earth. But today was her usual shopping day, and Gavin parked himself downstairs, with his bluetooth and all the paperwork he needed.

  “...and the only way to do that is to make sure there’s plenty of particle board.”

  Damn it, he’d drifted off again in the middle of the conversation. “I ordered the truck of particle board last week. It should be here tomorrow.”

  “Good. Then make sure you pay attention to what I’m saying next time because I agreed with your order,” Homes said. “You are distracted, Schwartz, what the hell is going on?”

  “Sorry, sir. Girl trouble.”

  “You’re seeing someone?”

  “I thought I was.”

  “Oooh, okay. I see. Well, that’s fine, but stop mooning over her and get your ass in gear. It’s not that I’m not sympathetic, Gav, but you have to remember there’s a work life balance you’ve never encountered in this. Mooning over a chippie is not work. That’s life.”

  Gavin choked on his sip of coffee. “Mooning over a chippie?”

  “That what all you hip kids say now, isn’t it?”

  “Mister Homes...”

  “Find your balance, Gavin. Also, take the afternoon off to find your balance.”

  Gavin didn’t quite catch the statement right away, but after a moment, he realized that Homes had just told him to go find the girl and figure it out. “Thank you, sir, I appreciate that.”

  He wondered what had happened. He waited by the desk, but there was no sign of Bernadette this morning. Had she just disappeared? He knew she lived alone; her parents were up north, and she had the affections of four siblings to compete with, all of whom were married. That left her, alone, with no kids to attract their attention.

  Gavin was worried. He was afraid something had happened to her, and that she was laying in that big house all alone. Hurt, maybe. He hurried out of the building just minutes after noon and hustled to the new Maxima he’d bought earlier in the week. It took him only minutes to drive from the store to Bernadette’s house. Maybe it was weird that he was so invested in this woman so quickly, but he’d been hoping for a date so long that he didn’t want to lose the chance for another, or take years getting to know her.

  The big house was sitting back from the curb, looking somewhat ominous with the gray clouds of a summer thunderstorm in the distance. He pulled into a spot in front of the house and tossed the car in park, almost out the door before the engine was off. The old door bell button next to the knob still worked, a very old school bell sound echoing through the door. He also knocked because he wanted in the house now to check on her.

  It was a long few minutes, and two more rings, before the deadbolt on the door snicked back, and the door slowly opened. Bernadette’s face appeared in the small crack she had opened. “What do you want?”

&nb
sp; Gavin’s hopes started to fade. “I just wanted to check on you, Nadi. I haven’t heard hide nor hair of you since last week.”

  “You don’t have to worry about me.” She started to close the door, and Gavin noticed her cheeks were wet with tears.

  “I do.” He punctuated his insistence by shoving his foot against the door and not allowing her to close it. “Talk to me, please. If you don’t want to see me again, that’s fine, but talk to me first, please. I didn’t think I screwed up that bad on Friday.”

  “It’s not you, Gav. Just…go away.”

  “No. What’s going on?”

  “You’re not going to move your stupid ass foot, are you?”

  “No.”

  Bernadette stepped away from the door and let it drift open. “Fine. Come in. You’re letting out my air conditioning.”

  As she walked away from him, deeper into the house, he saw her limping. It was bad this time, and her gait had him believing she was in serious pain because of it. Closing and locking the door behind himself, he followed her through the huge house and into the kitchen. He watched as she lowered herself into a chair, the relief from the pain of walking on the foot clear.

  “What’s going on?” Gavin didn’t sit down.

  “I’m having a bad week with the pain.”

  “Did I screw up the date that bad?”

  “No…”

  “Then why did you stop texting me?”

  “I told you, I’m having a bad week.”

  “Nadi, I want to help you. If you’re having a bad week, let me help. I didn’t pine over you for six months, so I could ignore you, or not help when you needed it.”

  There was a silence in the air for a moment, and it was charged with electricity, denial, anger…and then it softened, and he saw Bernadette weaken a bit. “I didn’t think that you wanted to be saddle with a woman who can’t walk on the worst day and limps the rest of the time.”

  This time, Gavin took the chair next to her. “I don’t care about that. You were always limping when you came in. I never saw that. Do you know what I saw?” He gently lifted a lock of her hair and twirled it around his fingers. “This. This red hair. And then I saw your eyes. Because who could ever miss such gorgeous green eyes in a sea of flames?”

  Her lip was trembling. “I’m broken, Gavin. I don’t work right. I couldn’t even stand long enough to put dishes in the dishwasher.”

  “That’s fine. They’re just dishes.”

  She put her hands over her face. “They broke me.” Her whole body shook and shivered as she started sobbing.

  “Well, fuck.” Gavin knelt next to her. “Nadi, they injured your foot, they didn’t break you. Sweetheart, please. Let me help you. I want to. That’s why I’m here. What do you need? What has to be done?”

  Bernadette looked at him. “I need my foot to heal, Gavin. I need… The doctor is sending me to a specialist next Tuesday. An orthopedic surgeon who specializes in amputations. They can’t save it. It keeps breaking, and cracking and getting infected. There’s nothing more they can do to save it.” She burst into uncontrollable sobs. “They are going to take my foot!”

  He stood and scooped her off the chair, walking both of them back to the living room where he’d seen two couches, and picked the larger of the two. He sat her down, then arranged them so that she was cradled against him. She sobbed and screamed, cried and yelled. She punched his arm and shook the couch with her cries.

  He just held her.

  * * *

  There was a whisper of sound near by, and Gavin opened his eyes. He smiled immediately; Bernadette was sitting on the floor in front of him, watching him.

  “We fell asleep,” she explained.

  “That we did.”

  “I ordered Chinese. I was really hungry. It should be her shortly.”

  “Mm, Chinese.”

  “I’m sorry I—”

  Gavin put a finger to her lips and slipped off the couch to sit with her on the floor. “You are not allowed to apologize, Nadi. I understand. You needed to get that out.”

  “Yeah, but I punched you.”

  “Eh. I work in home improvement. I’ve had two-by-fours fall on my head. You’re going to have work on your right hook if you want to impress me.”

  Bernadette laughed. “Thank you. I don’t deserve a chance after how I treated you.”

  “You most certainly fucking do.” Gavin tilted his head. “This has been really hard on you.”

  “Survivor’s guilt, the therapist says. True assessment.”

  The door bell rang, and Bernadette moved to stand. Gavin put a hand on her shoulder and shook his head. “No. I got this. Rest the foot.” He trotted over to the door and pulled it open, the delivery man on the other side declaring the price. Paying and tipping the man, he took the food over to the coffee table and put it down. “Do you have a problem eating here? We can go back to the kitchen.”

  “No, I’m fine with eating here. This rug was cheap at Ikea. I plan to replace it when I’m done with this place.”

  “Good.” Gavin knelt and started pulling containers and packets out of the bag. “Tell me what happened in Iraq? If you can.”

  “I guess I’m one of the lucky ones. I don’t have PTSD from my time served. At least, not that has arisen yet. Being a nurse gives you a layer of ‘ain’t the worst I’ve seen’ that you don’t get other places. That’s not to say that I don’t have some issues with what went on. There are nightmares, but the therapist said I’m just better at processing what happened that day.”

  Gavin didn’t say a word, he just kept working to set up dinner. Bernadette poked at one of the packets on the table. “Amir was twelve when he started walking around outside the camp. He was curious. He was still a small kid, too. He and his friends would talk to us and try to befriend us. Most of the others were gone quickly, losing interest in the camp. But Amir hung in there. Eventually, someone let him in, and we showed him around. This was probably about a month into my deployment there. He was a nice kid, and he took a shine to the medical unit. I guess we all kind of hoped he wanted to be a doctor or a nurse. Something to help the people he loved. And that’s where we fell into the trap. He was coming around for months, checking things out. Hanging out with the guys, learning poker.

  “He was in with us after about three months. He could come and go as he pleased. It was a mistake, a big one. He walked in one day and found me. His voice was just changing, and he told me there was something wrong with one of the guys over in the mess tent. I picked up my medical pack and headed out the door, and as the door closed, the building exploded. The supply building where several dozen soldiers were helping to offload a truck and load the supplies into the building.

  “He made me walk away because he didn’t want to kill a woman.” The packet of hot mustard was being stabbed violently. “They let a prepubescent boy walk in, strapped with a bomb, and he made me leave because I was a woman.”

  “Survivor’s guilt.” Gavin made a quiet observation.

  “The bomber made me leave. Guilt is probably a large enough word for what I felt. We were invaders in their land, and they used a boy to hurt us. Fifteen of the guys were killed immediately. He had gotten that close to them. The other thirty around the building were in bad, bad shape, and anyone outside that building, probably about twenty of us were taken down with the shrapnel from the stuff in the supply building. One wall was completely destroyed, and the rest of the building was on fire. The building next door, an officers’ tent, caught about a minute later. It was pandemonium. I couldn’t feel my foot, but I knew I had to keep moving, trying to keep the guys who were alive, alive. I walked on that foot for five hours before someone noticed I was bleeding and clearly dragging it behind me. The crutch I’d been using for only two wasn’t enough.

  “I wound up being flown back to Landstuhl, Germany to the medical center there. I had four operations in a month to fix the foot. I was flown back to Walter Reed the next month and had two more operations in a
month. There was no way I was ever going to be deployed again, so when my re-up came up, I opted out. I had another two months in Walter Reed before they discharged me, from the hospital and the army.

  “I’ve been working with therapists, mental and physical, and doctors for the past eight months to get this foot to heal. But there was an infection and a set back about six months ago that took me back to the hospital and set back the work that had been done. It’s been problem after problem after problem since then, with more pain and painful days ever before.

  “And I still have trouble dealing with the fact that they sent a twelve-year-old to kill us, a kid I liked and wanted to see succeed in life. And that killer sent me away so I wouldn’t die.”

  Gavin put a paper plate in front of her. “Is the therapist helping?”

  “Yes. And no. I mean, for fuck’s sake a twelve-year-old.”

  “And the doctor told you the foot…”

  “Is nearly hopeless at this point. The damage done was bad enough. Walking on it compounded the mess. Then the infection basically destroyed any hope of having an ankle that moved. Everything he’s done since then has involved fusing bones. I’ve been to some of the best specialist in the nation trying to get this damn thing fixed, and they came back to me yesterday and said that removing it is the best option at this point. They are afraid of re-infection, breaking, chipping, even gangrene. There’s nothing left to try and fix it anymore.”

  “Did you know this was a possibility?”

  She stared at him. “When you’re in Iraq, you know dying is a possibility. You know that coming back in several more pieces than you started is a possibility. You know that come back with less than you started is a possibility. It doesn’t make any of this easier. It doesn’t make a less of a blow that you’re going to lose something that you took for granted.”

  “When you first got to Germany, did they tell you this was a way that this could end?”

  “Yes, of course. They always give you the worst case scenarios. They had told me there was a chance I could lose my leg up to my hip.”