The Shoggoth Who Loved Me

by K X Douglas

  “Alright. I guess you did drink quite a bit even before the beer pong,” Heidi said with a chuckle.

  “Yeah, I’m kinda surprised you can still stand,” Victoria said.

  Indeed, Peter could stand and walk just fine, though he pretended otherwise. He made his way to the door.

  I wish I knew which place was Eric’s so I could go check on him. Oh, well, I guess Lachlan can take care of him for the night.

  “Hey, Peter!” Heidi shouted from the living room.

  Standing on the threshold, he spun around to face her.

  “Maybe next time you can try on my handcuffs?” She said coyly.

  “Sure?”

  He shut the door and walked back to his dorm room. Once he got inside, he locked the door and removed his clothes.

  I hope I don’t have any surprise guests. Maybe I can pretend to sleep for a full eight hours. Tomorrow I can check on Eric and see how he’s doing.

  ***

  Peter dressed himself at sunrise and spent the next few hours browsing the internet. The first thing he searched was “handcuffs and sex”. He was met with a variety of images which showed him that the cuffs broadly used in BDSM were not, in fact, police handcuffs.

  Humans are weird.

  After wasting several hours browsing the internet and doing absolutely nothing productive, he began to hear noises from outside that suggested that people were out and about.

  I should go check on Eric and see if he’s okay. It’s kind of my fault he got that drunk, after all. Now, which dorm was his again?

  He tried to retrace the steps that Eric and Lachlan had taken from the party the previous night. Eventually, he was fairly sure that he had the right place, and he knocked on the door.

  Eric answered. His face was puffy and reddened, which hid his freckles somewhat, and there were substantial bags under his eyes.

  “Oh, hey, Peter. What’s up?”

  “Just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

  “Yeah, I’m fine. Just have a bit of a hangover. How was the party?”

  “Oh, I played ‘Never Have I Ever’ with Heidi and Victoria after you left.”

  “God, you kept drinking? How are you not dead?”

  “I don’t know, to be honest,” he lied. “I don’t think I drank that much during the game. They kept saying things that I’ve never done. We just about ran out of alcohol by the end of it; then I decided to call it a night. Heidi said something about wanting me to try on her handcuffs.”

  Eric’s eyes went wide. He punched Peter in the stomach. Peter tried his best to react appropriately, keeling over for a moment and pretending to be winded.

  “Dude, are you made of neutronium? She wants your dick!”

  “Is that what that’s all about?” Peter asked. “She likes me?”

  “She might. It could have just been the alcohol talking, though. Nobody else was playing; just the three of you?”

  “Right. How’s Lachlan, by the way?”

  “He’s doing good. He’s not hungover. Fucker looks like he just got back from a day at the spa, as a matter of fact. God, why am I surrounded by people who can drink me under the table?”

  “You did drink more than the rest of them, Eric. By quite a bit.”

  “I guess I did. Gotta say, I’m jealous of your charisma. You just moved here and you already have women fawning over you.”

  “I wouldn’t call it ‘fawning’, Eric…and what charisma? I just fumbled my way through a drinking game. I had absolutely no idea what I was doing!”

  “That makes it all the more ridiculous! Oh, dude, come inside, I don’t want to keep the door open.”

  Peter walked inside and took off his shoes, and Eric shut the door behind him.

  The dorm room had the exact same layout as the one where Heidi and Victoria lived, but it was comparatively under-furnished.

  Lachlan was watching television, not paying much attention to what was going on around him. He spared a glance away from the screen.

  “Oh, hey, Peter. How are you feeling?”

  “Good, you?”

  “I’m feeling good,” Lachlan said. “You not hungover or anything?”

  “Nope.”

  “You two are freaks, I swear,” Eric said. “I’ve tried pretty much every remedy there is, and I still feel like shit. I’m this close to just cracking open a case of beer and getting drunk again.”

  “No, dude, don’t do that!” Lachlan said. “That’s the worst thing to do for a hangover! Just drink some water!”

  “I have!” Eric shouted. “I’ve drunk an entire fucking pitcher of water so far this morning!”

  “Drink more water!” Lachlan replied.

  “Dammit, Lachlan. Oh, Peter, make yourself at home.”

  Peter pulled out a chair from the kitchen table and sat down.

  “So, Eric, you’re majoring in psychology, too?”

  “Yeah,” Eric replied as he opened a cupboard and pulled out a glass.

  “Have you thought much about what you want to do with your degree after you finish?” Peter asked.

  “A little bit,” Eric said. He turned on the sink and filled the glass. “I’m looking at becoming a clinical psychologist. I’m pretty sure I have to get my doctorate for that, so I’m in this for the long haul. How about you?” He paused to drink half of the glass.

  “Not really,” Peter replied. “I’m mostly just taking a degree for the college experience at this point. I’ve never really given much thought to the future; it’s so far away.”

  “That’s the way to live life!” Lachlan called from across the room.

  “Man, that must be nice. I’m the exact opposite, always agonizing about how things are going to turn out in the end. I, uh, tend to get paralyzed with indecision pretty often. Hey, can I get you anything?”

  “I’m fine, thank you,” Peter said. “How about you, Lachlan? Have you thought much about what kind of career you want?”

  “Dunno, really. I’m looking for a band right now. We’ll see how that works out. I’ve never been in a band before.”

  “Have you performed live before?” Peter asked.

  “Couple of times. Not at major venues or anything.”

  Suddenly, Eric walked up to Peter and nudged his side.

  “Hey, dude, what the fuck is going on with your foot?” he whispered.

  Peter looked down and saw that his feet were starting to revert to a more protean form with small tentacles peeking out from under his socks. Rather than lose his cool, he took a deep breath and glanced over to Lachlan, who wasn’t paying attention at all. He looked back at Eric, made eye contact, and held a finger to his lips.

  “What do you mean?” he asked. His tentacles receded back into his skin, and he adjusted his socks. “I sprained my ankle last week, so it might still be a little bit swollen.”

  Eric simply stared at Peter, agog.

  “Hey, Eric, would you be willing to show me what the bedrooms look like in these two-person dorms?” he said with a wink. “I’m in one of the bachelor suites, and I’m curious as to how much space you have to work with.”

  “Uh, sure.”

  Eric walked over to the hallway which led to the two bedrooms and opened the far door. Inside was a densely cluttered room with barely enough room for a person to stretch out. He gestured for Peter to walk in and closed the door behind both of them.

  “Alright, if I explain this to you, you must promise not to tell anyone. Not Lachlan, not your family, nobody.”

  “Dude, what gives all of a sudden?” Eric asked.

  “You weren’t hallucinating. Promise me you won’t scream, okay?” Peter said as he started to revert back to his true form. His clothing fell to the floor as his body collapsed upon itself. Several mouths appeared along his ‘back’ and began speaking in unison. “This is what I really am. I am not human. I am what is called a ‘shoggoth’. I have been masquerading as a human for just over twelve years now. Besides yourself, only my adoptive parents know.”<
br />
  Peter reverted to his human form and began to dress himself.

  “Does…does that happen every time you transform?” Eric asked.

  “The nudity?” Peter asked as he finished pulling his hoodie over his head.

  “Yeah, that.”

  “Yes, it does.”

  “Is…is there a real Peter that you based your appearance off of?”

  “Not as far as I know. I just tried to create a form that looked like a generic human boy. I can tweak it however I want; I’ve been manually ageing myself this whole time.”

  “Can…can you turn into…you know…other people?”

  “Yes, I can. But I don’t do that because I tend to get details wrong. I do everything manually, so I would have to have seen the person naked in order to turn into a perfect copy of them.”

  Eric blinked.

  “Right. So, uh, what happened back there to cause you to start…transforming back all of a sudden?”

  “You know, I’m not sure. It might have been something as simple as a loss of concentration.”

  “I take it this doesn’t happen very often?”

  “No, it doesn’t.”

  It was then that Peter noticed that Eric’s nose was bleeding.

  CHAPTER THREE

  “Hey, uh, Eric?” Peter asked.

  “Yeah?”

  Peter pointed at his own nose.

  “You’re bleeding. I shouldn’t have done that. I forgot what happens to humans when they see me.”

  “Wait, what happens?”

  “You’re better off not knowing. Just go into the bathroom and get yourself cleaned up. I’ll go distract Lachlan.”

  “Um…alright.”

  Eric ran into the bathroom, which was just across the hallway. Meanwhile, Peter walked back into the living room and sat on the couch next to Lachlan.

  “Eric still feeling like shit?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Eh, he’ll feel better in a couple of hours. Bet you he’ll be at the party tonight, too.”

  “There’s another party tonight?”

  “Dude, it’s Sunday and classes don’t start until Thursday. There’s probably going to be at least one party on res every single night until then and then another party Friday night. You gonna go?”

  “Is it going to be at Victoria and Heidi’s place again?”

  “I don’t know. It might be over at the four-person dorms. Now that most everyone’s moved into the dorms, any party’s gonna need to be at a place with enough space for all the guests.”

  Peter heard the bathroom door open. Eric walked back into the living room.

  “You okay there, buddy?” Lachlan asked.

  “Yeah, I’m okay,” Eric replied.

  “I guess I’ll be going to the party tonight,” Peter said. “Although I don’t know if I can afford to be drinking for that many days in a row.”

  “Do you mean, like, money-wise or health-wise?” Lachlan asked.

  “Mostly money-wise.”

  “Oh, there’ll be lots of alcohol at any party on campus, dude,” Eric said. “Among other things.”

  “Other things?” Peter asked.

  “Other drugs,” Eric said. “Campus may be officially ‘cannabis-free’ but people are definitely going to be bringing weed.”

  “Huh,” Peter muttered. “Never smoked weed before.”

  “If you try it, make sure you don’t drink alcohol at the same time,” Eric said. “Although judging by how much you drank last night without even seeming tipsy, you might not have a problem.”

  Peter chuckled. He found himself glancing down towards his feet again. Fortunately, there were no more tentacles peeking out from his socks.

  ***

  The party was being held at a larger dorm room, one meant for four students. It was still packed with people. Music was playing on an unseen sound system, at such a volume that the bass could be felt through the walls and floor.

  Lachlan accompanied Peter; Eric had decided to stay at home so that he may recover from his hangover. They didn’t bring any alcohol, hoping that there would be plenty available.

  They split up, and Peter wove his way through the crowd of people in search of a place where he could sit down. He saw that much of the furniture on the first floor had been moved around a single coffee table where a hookah had been set up, and a group of students was sitting around it. He took one of the free chairs and observed them quietly, making sure that his hands were hidden from view in case his transformation started to fade.

  Many of them were smoking one of the stems, but one person sitting next to him was abstaining. She wore her blond hair in a long French braid, and she was wearing a t-shirt and yoga pants.

  She looks like she doesn’t really want to be here.

  “You can have some if you want,” another woman said to him. She was sitting on the couch across from him.

  Peter looked over and saw that she was offering him one of the stems of the hookah.

  “Um, I might have some later,” he replied. “I haven’t decided if I’m drinking yet.”

  She was wearing a long, flowing, patterned skirt and a loose-fitting tie-dyed top which screamed “boho-chic”. Her hair, though long and unkempt, was bunched up beneath a beanie, and tattered strands peaked out from the edges.

  “I’m Serena,” she said. “That’s my roommate, Isabelle.” She jerked her head towards the woman who was sitting next to him. “I dragged her along in an attempt to get her to be more social.”

  “This isn’t my idea of fun, Serena,” she said.

  “I know you aren’t into drugs, hon, but I want you to at least meet some people tonight.”

  “I’m Peter.”

  “Nice to meet you,” Serena replied.

  “Is this your place, or do you know whose place this is?”

  “No to both. I just brought the hookah.”

  Suddenly, a hand clapped Peter on the shoulder. For a moment, he froze, instinct taking over and making him immediately fear for the worst.

  “There you are, dude,” Lachlan said. “Been looking for you.”

  Peter relaxed his posture as Lachlan let go of his shoulder. He looked down at his hands again to make sure that they were still hands. Once he was sure that his transformation was stable, he turned to face Lachlan.

  “Where have you been?” he asked.

  “Trying to find some damned vodka,” he said, gesturing with the screwdriver in his hand. “Took me forever. Seems most of the people here are beer drinkers.”

  He pulled up a chair on the other side of Peter.

  “Oh, uh, Lachlan? Serena, Isabelle. Ladies, this is my friend Lachlan.”

  “Pleasure,” he said with a nod. “What are we smoking?”

  “I’ve got some white widow in here,” Serena said. “Top quality stuff. Not many people have tried it yet, so there’s quite a bit left.”

  “I think I’ll try a bit,” Lachlan said as he took one of the stems.

  “I thought you weren’t supposed to drink and smoke at the same time?” Peter asked.

  “Eric said you shouldn’t because you haven’t smoked before. I have. Then again, have you been drinking tonight? You don’t seem to have a beer on you.”

  “I haven’t, no.”

  “Then you should be fine!” Serena said. “Go on, have a toke.”

  Peter placed one of the stems in his mouth and inhaled deeply, savouring the pungent citrus flavour. After a few seconds, he exhaled a large cloud of smoke in Serena’s direction.

  I wonder if this stuff affects me at all? Maybe it will, unlike alcohol.

  The three of them took turns smoking over the next hour, and it steadily became easier for Peter to lose track of the crowd around him. Eventually, the anxiety over being discovered by Eric faded completely. People came to the table and left, but he paid them little mind.

  When Peter looked down at his hands again, he saw that they had completely reverted to protoplasmic ooze, shimmering and shifting lik
e two small piles of sludge in his lap. He moved his hands into his pockets, hoping that that would be enough to hide them from view, and made for the bathroom. Wherever that was.

  His ability to perceive time completely gone, Peter wasn’t sure how long it took for him to find the bathroom. When he finally got there, he was happy to see that it was unoccupied. He dashed in and shut the door behind him.

  Looking at himself in the mirror, he could see some patches on his face where his transformation was reverting; slimy patches with tiny little eyes on them. He brought his hands up in front of his face and tried to solidify them into the shape of normal human hands, to no avail. He grabbed one appendage with the other; it certainly felt normal.

  Someone knocked on the bathroom door.

  “Occupied!” he shouted.

  “Peter?” It was Lachlan. “You alright in there?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Did you smoke too much or something?”

  “I think so,” Peter said.

  “It happens. You’re not throwing up, are you?”

  “No.”

  “Are you pretty stoned right now?”

  “I must be. Is hallucination normal?”

  “Uh, it can happen, but it’s not common.”

  Peter’s hands were grasping away at his face, searching for the eyes that he wasn’t completely sure were there. He could feel smooth human skin and the odd bit of stubble, but no extra eyelids, lips, or other facial features that weren’t supposed to be there.

  Am I just hallucinating, then? I didn’t start transforming back into my true form in front of everyone?

  He opened the bathroom door, only a crack at first, and looked outside. Lachlan was waiting for him, leaning against the opposite wall.

  “Hey, do I look alright?” Peter asked.

  “Uh, yeah, you look fine? Honestly, you don’t even look stoned. Your eyes aren’t bloodshot or anything.”

  Shit, I didn’t know that was supposed to happen!

  They walked back to the living room, where Serena was still waiting, and returned to their seats.

  “Did Isabelle leave?” Peter asked.

  “Yeah,” Serena said. “I tried to convince her to stay awhile longer but she wasn’t having it. I think she needed to go home and recharge.” She paused to place the stem in her mouth and inhale. “She might be back later. You feeling alright?”