An Amish Courtship

by Jan Drexler

  Jonas shook his head. “There are no contradictions. Your troubles now might be because of your father’s weaknesses, but that doesn’t mean that you will face eternal punishment for them. You are your own man, and responsible for your own choices.” He let these words sink in. “You can change the course of your life, and your family’s life, by making the decisions your father couldn’t. Your brother made that choice.”

  Bram again. The farmyard was quiet. The men and teams had gone out to the field.

  Jonas straightened. “I need to join the others in the field. Vernon’s team is waiting. You’re sure you don’t want to drive them?”

  Samuel pushed the words out. “I can’t.”

  “Think about what I said. With God’s help, you can come out of the hole you’ve gotten yourself into. You can become a full member of the community, rather than a stray hanging around the edges.”

  Samuel eyed the preacher. His expression was as mild as ever, but his eyes burned with enthusiasm, as if he had just finished preaching a sermon.

  “I’ll consider it. I just don’t know if it will do any good. The men won’t give me a chance.”

  “Don’t use that as an excuse.” Jonas started back toward the barn and the waiting team. “There will always be Martin Troyers in your life. It’s up to you to prove them wrong.”

  Samuel ran a finger between the harness and Tilly’s warm side. Preacher Jonas was right, and if he was ever going to change Martin Troyer’s opinion, it had to start today.

  “Wait,” he called to Jonas. “I’ll drive the team, if they’re well trained.”

  The preacher paused. “Why did you refuse before?”

  Samuel glanced at the Percherons. “Daed sold our horses before he died, and I haven’t driven a team since then. I’m afraid I’m out of practice.”

  Jonas grinned. “It’s as easy as falling off a log with a team like this one. I’ll help you refresh your memory, and then you’ll be all set.”

  Samuel took the reins as Jonas handed them over and climbed into the seat of the plow. The thick leather straps molded to his hands and he gathered up the slack. One of the horses looked at him, as if he knew a stranger held the reins, but then, at Jonas’s signal, Samuel called, “Hi-yup, there!” and the horses started toward the field.

  Jonas jumped onto the step next to the seat and stood there as Samuel guided the team into the line of plows and engaged the blades. Martin Troyer kept his face straight ahead, but a couple of the other men gave him a friendly wave as he joined them.

  “I don’t think you need my help at all,” Jonas said.

  Samuel grinned. “Like you said, it’s as easy as falling off a log.”

  * * *

  Mary guided Chester through the crowded streets of Shipshewana. Tuesday morning meant the weekly auction, and folks from all over northern Indiana had flocked to town to either buy or sell goods. At the corner of State Road 5, she waited until the traffic cleared, then clucked Chester into a swift trot across the busy road.

  Ida Mae leaned forward from the back seat. “Are you sure Mr. Holdeman will buy eggs again? You were just here on Friday.”

  “He said he would buy as many as I could bring him.”

  Sadie had been quiet during the trip to town, but as Mary turned into the Holdemans’ parking lot she said, “I thought we were going to church.” She turned toward Mary, her face pinched with worry.

  Mary laid her hand over her aunt’s. “You must have misunderstood me. I said we were going to town.”

  Sadie looked toward the feed store. “Why are we here? We don’t buy things here.”

  Ida Mae and Mary exchanged glances. This seemed to be one of Aunt Sadie’s bad days.

  “It’s all right.” Mary picked up the egg basket and climbed out of the buggy. “You stay here with Ida Mae while I go in to sell the eggs.”

  Walking into the elevator’s office, Mary smiled at the sound of the bell over the door. The ringing had jangled her nerves on Friday, but today the bell sounded like an old friend. Mr. Holdeman came out of a back room, wiping his hands on a rag.

  “Well, good morning. I thought you might be back today.” He gestured toward her basket as she set it on the counter. “I’m glad you brought more eggs. The buyer from Detroit will be here this afternoon.”

  Mary smiled at his welcome. “I only have one dozen today, if that’s all right.” Much to her dismay, Ida Mae had opened one of the many jars of pickled eggs for their lunch yesterday instead of cooking eggs for breakfast. But between that and skimping on the eggs they used during other meals, they had ended up with a full dozen.

  “Like I said before, I can take as many as you bring me.” He started transferring the eggs from her basket to a tray. “Have you given any more thought to my offer of helping to expand your business?”

  “We have. My sister and I will work on the project together.”

  He nodded. “I thought you would, so I’ve talked to Hal Stutzman over at the lumberyard. All you need to do is stop by there, and he’ll see that you get the lumber you need.”

  “I don’t know what to say...”

  “Don’t say anything.” He opened the cash drawer for her dime and handed it to her. “Just bring more eggs.”

  Mary had already climbed back in the buggy before she remembered that she had no way to take the lumber home. She told Ida Mae about Mr. Holdeman’s offer.

  “Then we’ll just have to borrow Samuel’s wagon and come back tomorrow.”

  “We won’t need to,” Sadie said as Chester turned the corner by the auction barn. “Samuel’s here already.”

  Samuel had just pulled his springwagon into the driveway ahead of them, and the girls were with him. Pig snouts stuck out through the board sides.

  Ida Mae leaned out of their buggy. “Judith! Esther!”

  When the girls saw them, they spoke to Samuel and he halted the wagon while they jumped off and ran back to the buggy.

  “It’s a surprise to see you here,” Esther said as she climbed into the back seat with Ida Mae.

  “It’s a surprise for us, too.” Mary turned Chester into the field where lines of buggies and horses were tied along a hitching rail. “Did I see pigs in the back of Samuel’s wagon?”

  “He’s taking them to the auction to sell so that he can buy seed corn.”

  Mary glanced at Sadie. She looked around with interest, as if she might see someone she knew. She seemed to have accepted that they were in Shipshewana this morning, rather than church. She turned in her seat to listen to the girls’ conversation, and her face had lost the vague expression from earlier.

  “What are you girls doing here today?” Judith asked.

  “We’re looking for some chickens to add to our flock,” Ida Mae said as Mary pulled Chester to a stop along the hitching rail next to a bay horse.

  “Then you decided to go into the egg business!” Esther grasped Mary’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze. “That’s exciting.”

  Sadie’s face clouded again. “What business?”

  “We talked about this yesterday, remember? Ida Mae and I are going to build a chicken coop and buy more chickens so that we can sell the eggs to Mr. Holdeman.”

  Her aunt smiled. “Ach, ja. I remember.”

  They went into the auction barn together, but Mary stopped just inside the entrance. The place was filled with people and noise, everything from cows bawling to horses neighing. All she could see were men in their summer straw hats and women in dark dresses. Old friends greeted one another with glad cries, while others walked along the aisles, peering at the animals for sale in the rows of pens.

  Mary kept her hand in Sadie’s elbow. “How will we ever find the chickens?” She had to shout, even though the other girls were gathered around her.

  A man waved to get her at
tention. “Chickens are along the north side, over there.”

  She made her way through the crowds with Sadie, while Ida Mae followed with the girls. Nearly thirty cages of chickens were stacked in a corner, next to pens filled with hogs. Each cage held three or four chickens. She happened to look toward the pigpens as Samuel guided a pair of his sows through a gate and closed it behind them. He wiped his face with a handkerchief before he looked around and saw them. A smile appeared as his eyes met Mary’s and he made his way over to them.

  “You’re looking to buy some chickens?”

  “Ja, for sure,” Ida Mae said. “Mary and I are going into the egg business.”

  He had leaned over to look into a cage of Rhode Island Reds, but at Ida Mae’s words, he shot a glance at Mary. “The egg business?”

  As she nodded, he gave Esther a couple coins. “The hogs and chickens won’t be up for a while yet. Why don’t you take Sadie somewhere a little quieter and get some lemonade for everyone?”

  Esther gave him a quick hug. “Denki, Samuel. We will.”

  Samuel grasped Mary’s elbow as the others left. “Not you. We need to talk.”

  “What about?”

  He ushered her out of the aisle until they stood alongside the pen holding his sows. “What is this about going into business?”

  “Just what Ida Mae said. We’re going to add to our flock. Mr. Holdeman at the grain elevator said he will buy as many eggs as we can bring him.”

  Samuel crossed his arms and rubbed at his chin with one hand. He looked much better today than he had the last time she saw him. His clothes were clean, and he wore the new trousers Esther had made.

  “You can’t put many more hens into the chicken coop in Sadie’s barn.”

  “I know. That’s why we’re building a new henhouse.”

  His eyebrows rose. “A new henhouse? How many chickens are you thinking about?”

  “I think seventy-five will be enough.”

  “Seventy-five?” He leaned against the hog’s fence. “I don’t think you know what you’re getting into.”

  Mary pressed her lips together and counted to ten before she spoke. The barn echoed as the auctioneer started warming up for the horse auction. As the noise rose, she stepped closer to Samuel so she wouldn’t have to shout. She looked up into his face, waiting for the panic that being this close to a man should bring, but there was only irritation with Samuel’s assumptions that she wouldn’t be able to follow through on her plans.

  “I know exactly what I’m getting into.”

  “A lot of work and bother.”

  “Ja, a lot of work. But Ida Mae and I can do it.”

  He looked toward the auction arena, and then back at her. “Why? Are you bored? You don’t have enough to do, taking care of Sadie?”

  “I’m not bored. It’s a way to earn a living. This is a good opportunity.”

  “You don’t need to earn a living. There are plenty of single men around who are looking for a wife.” He ran his thumbs up and down his suspenders. “Any one of them would be glad to marry you.”

  Mary’s stomach seethed. “As if I’m some brood mare or sow, depending on some man for everything so that I can have a comfortable life?”

  Samuel leaned toward her with amusement in his eyes. He was laughing at her!

  “The man takes care of the woman and their children. That’s how it is, and how it should be. You need to get married, not start a business.”

  Mary folded her arms around her middle. “That may be how it is for some women, but not for me.” She bit her lip to hold back the sudden tears that threatened. The dream of a loving husband who would care for her and their family was gone. Long gone. She wasn’t fit to be any man’s wife.

  * * *

  Samuel tried to laugh at the set line of Mary’s lips. She was as stubborn as Sadie, for sure.

  “All right, all right. You don’t have to get married.” Samuel smiled as Mary’s brows lowered. She reminded him of a setting hen, herself, with her mind focused on one idea. “But you don’t have to worry about supporting yourselves. The church and our family have always taken care of Sadie. It doesn’t make much difference if you girls are there or not.”

  “It does make a difference. Folks can’t afford to give us as much as they have been. And there are other families in need.” Her expression shifted. “Ida Mae and I are willing and able to work, but we need to stay on the farm to do it. Mr. Holdeman said that many of the farmers’ wives are earning money this way.”

  “Holdeman.” Samuel watched two men as they looked his sows over, but they moved on without asking any questions. “Holdeman is a fair businessman, and good to work with.” He turned to Mary again. “I guess if you’re determined to do this, I could help.”

  She allowed a smile then. “I hoped you would say that. We need to pick up some items at the lumberyard, but we don’t have a wagon.”

  Her hands were clasped in front of her, and Samuel had the sudden urge to take them in his own. But his were calloused and worn. Dirty from handling the horse and the sows. Not worthy to touch her soft, slim fingers. He drew his fingers into a loose fist, hiding them.

  “I’ll be happy to help. We can swing by the lumberyard after the sale is over.” He was gratified to see her nod her thanks. “Do you want to see if the others have found some lemonade?”

  Mary glanced toward the cages of chickens. “I’d rather look at the chickens. I’ve never bought anything at an auction before. How do I know I’ll get the ones I want?”

  He followed her to a cage of Plymouth Rock hens. The black-and-white bars on their wings set them apart from the cages of White Leghorns next to them. “First, don’t get your heart set on any particular lot.”

  “Lot?”

  “Each cage is sold either singly or in a group. Either way, that’s called a lot.”

  “So I don’t choose one? I just wait to see which one I win?”

  Samuel shook his head. She didn’t have any experience, and yet she thought she could go into business?

  “It isn’t as easy as that. You need to choose the ones you want to bid on, but be willing to let them go if the price is too high. How much did you plan to spend?”

  “I have two dollars. Will that be enough?”

  “The way the prices went the last time I was here, you should be able to get a dozen hens or so. Which breed are you thinking of?”

  “I like these Plymouth Rocks. They’re the same breed Sadie already has. But the Extension Office bulletin said that the White Leghorns are better layers.”

  “Extension Office bulletin? What’s that?”

  “Mr. Holdeman had a display of them in his store at the grain elevator. There were bulletins on nearly anything you can think of when it comes to farming. Ida Mae and I read the one on egg production. It was very informative.”

  “So if the White Leghorns are better layers, why would anyone want to buy the Plymouth Rocks?”

  She turned toward him. “Because the Plymouth Rocks are also good for meat. It depends on why you’re raising them.” Her eyes narrowed. “I thought a man would know that.”

  He shrugged as he felt his face heat. “Mamm and the girls always took care of the chickens. I’ve never had much to do with them.”

  “So perhaps going into the egg business isn’t such a strange idea after all.” She perched her fists at her waist.

  Samuel grinned. “I already said I would help you, didn’t I?”

  She smiled back. “You did, but I wasn’t sure if you still thought I would be better off letting someone else take care of me.”

  Samuel felt his grin widen. Mary was smart, and could keep up with his teasing. She turned back to the chickens and examined a cage holding a rooster. Why had he said that stuff about her needing to get married? If she m
arried someone, he would never be able to talk with her like this. As long as she was single, he was free to spend as much time with her as he wished.

  “I think I’ll bid on these.” Mary indicated the ten white hens. “Do you think I need the rooster, too? Sadie doesn’t have one.”

  “Only if you want to raise chicks. The hens will lay just as many eggs whether there’s a rooster around or not.”

  She smoothed her apron as she considered his words. “I guess if women can get along fine without men, then hens can, too.”

  She turned and walked toward another group of cages. Samuel followed her. Bantering with her was one thing, but this was going too far.

  He grasped her elbow and turned her toward him. “What do you mean, women can get along—” He stopped when he saw the laughter in her eyes.

  “I was only teasing you. I have to admit, men are convenient when there are heavy chores to do.”

  Folding his arms across his chest, Samuel planted his feet. “Haven’t you known any men who were useful for more than chores?”

  The light went out of her eyes as if he had blown out a flame. She sucked her lower lip in between her teeth. When she spoke, her voice shook like a willow in a storm. “Only my daed.” She walked toward a large cage filled with six Leghorns.

  Samuel swallowed. The look in her eyes...his mother had had that look.

  He followed her again. In this corner of the sale barn, the noise was a dull roar. Everyone was focused on the horse sale, and no one paid any attention to the two of them.

  “Mary, tell me. Has someone hurt you?”

  She didn’t look at him, but cleared her throat. “What makes you think that? Who would hurt me?”

  She ended her speech with a little laugh, but he didn’t believe her. Mamm had acted the same way, in the mornings at breakfast, even though Samuel had heard Daed’s voice through the floor berating her the night before. The averted gaze, the shaking voice. The denial that anything was amiss.

  Something had happened to Mary. But if she wouldn’t tell him the truth, wouldn’t confide in him, he was as helpless as he had been as a boy. There was no way he could protect her.