The Wrong Perfect Match (Fullilove in the House Book 1)

by Sidney Bristol

“Jayden, mijo, did you say that?”

  He glanced up and found everyone looking at him. And sitting at the head of the table was Asher. He wore the same clothes he had earlier, with the only difference being there was no toothpick. Mom wouldn’t stand for him to chew on those at her table.

  “I guess I did,” Jayden answered.

  Kingston shook his head. “You’re an asshole man.”

  “Language,” Dad barked.

  Kingston mumbled something, likely an apology.

  “Kingston’s right.” Luca glanced up from his phone to look across the table at Jayden. “You shouldn’t have spoken to her like that, man.”

  Diego pursed his lips, which was akin to him actually speaking. No doubt he didn’t approve either.

  Jayden grit his teeth.

  The prodigal son was home again, and the family would forgive all wrongs just to have him back. The image of them all sitting together broke Jayden’s brain.

  There needed to be more forgiveness in the world. At the same time, two wrongs didn’t make a right.

  Was Jayden in the wrong here? Was he so blinded by resentment toward his brother that he couldn’t see the right path?

  A phone vibrated in the ominous silence.

  Asher picked his device up off the table, glanced at it, then pushed his chair back. “Excuse me?”

  Jayden studied Asher. What was the real story? The full one with nothing left out? And why hadn’t he mentioned the rest of the details?

  Asher didn’t even glance at Jayden as he crossed to the front door and stepped out onto the porch.

  Mom and Dad looked at each other. Luca, Diego and Kingston traded their own looks. Maddox busied himself with his nephew, Nathan. Which left Sawyer and Jose in the kitchen peeking in on the whole thing.

  Jayden took a deep breath. He had to say something, account for his actions. But where did he start? What did he say?

  “Thanks,” a familiar voice said.

  Jayden turned and blinked at Nicole standing there on the entry mat wiping her shoes off.

  Asher held the door for her. “Not a problem.”

  Jayden stared past them, looking for a tall, dark haired woman. But there was no sign of her.

  His insides writhed and twisted, causing excruciating pain. No doubt he was missing that part of himself Brandi had taken with her.

  His heart.

  But of course she wouldn’t be here. She didn’t do family things.

  Nicole’s gaze landed on him and turned chilly. “Oh. You’re here already.”

  “Hi, Nicole,” Jayden muttered.

  She walked toward him, not glancing left or right. She only stopped when she would have been forced to walk through him. Given that she was human and he was very much solid, she stopped almost toe-to-toe with him.

  “I am here for one thing and one thing only. You are the problem, Jayden. You have impossible standards you want to hold people to.” She pressed her hand against her chest. “I knew from our emails I couldn’t measure up. Do you know how daunting that is? And Brandi. All she wanted to do was help you. You have no idea, no grasp at all, how much she did for you. Because out of all the men in the world, she somehow fell for you. And idiot me thought, maybe this will be good for the both of you. She gets you to loosen up. You ground her in a way I can’t. Instead, you took everything and gave nothing. Do you even care about her? Really and truly I mean? Or was this some dumb challenge for you?”

  Jayden stared back at her, his mind full of white noise and static.

  Impossible standards?

  Was that why things had never taken off with Nicole?

  Had he really been so selfish?

  “You can’t even say anything?” She crossed her arms over her chest now.

  “I cared,” he said softly.

  “Cared. Past tense.”

  He locked eyes with her. “I care.”

  “You have a crappy way of showing it. If this is the way you fight, if you think the last few days are an okay way to act, then I’m here to tell you it’s over. Brandi is my best friend. She’s closer than a sister to me. And I’m not about to let you wreck her again. She deserves your best, because that’s what she gave you. Even when she didn’t want to.”

  Jayden couldn’t look at her any more. He studied the woodgrain just right of his shoe.

  He didn’t recall everything he’d said at his condo Wednesday. The anger blistering his insides had burned away brain cells. The more Brandi had talked, the more furious he’d become. They’d yelled, said things, and when it was done the feeling of utter betrayal left inside of him had contaminated all the good.

  Did she have the full Asher story?

  She’d seemed hesitant to spill all of the details. That had stuck out to him when obsessing over every second he could remember.

  Anger gave him blinders, especially where Asher was involved.

  Nicole’s voice was softer when she spoke again. “That’s all I have to say. Sorry for barging in here like this.”

  “It’s cool,” Asher said. “You ladies okay?”

  “Yeah. Brandi’s keeping busy.”

  “And you?”

  “Well, Brandi is keeping me busy.” Nicole chuckled.

  Jayden turned his head and looked at Mom.

  She stared back at him with sad eyes.

  “I’m going now,” Nicole announced.

  Asher backed toward the entry. “I’ll walk you out.”

  No one spoke until the front door had closed.

  “Mom?” Jayden said.

  “Yes, mijo?”

  “Did I screw up?”

  One side of her mouth screwed up and she nodded.

  Fuck.

  He smoothed a hand over his hair and turned to look out the windows on the yard.

  Nicole and Jayden stood on the sidewalk. He didn’t know what they were saying, but neither appeared to be in a rush to head off to whatever came next.

  How did he begin to fix this? Could he? Should he? Did he deserve that?

  “You’re letting the best person to consult with leave.” Sawyer emerged from the dining room to stand in front of Jayden. “You know how many times Mom had to correct you over the years?”

  “No.”

  “Five. I kept a tally.” Sawyer smiled. “You’re a very...right or wrong person. You don’t process gray areas well. What Asher did wasn’t right, but it wasn’t wrong either. You’re getting hung up on one tiny fact that doesn’t impact your life at all. But you’ve made this about you. So, stop. Make it about fixing things.”

  Jayden swallowed.

  He couldn’t deny what Sawyer said. Any of it.

  From the time they were little, Jayden never totally understood his twin. How was it they could look identical, and yet beyond the outward trappings they were nothing alike? He’d often watched Asher and learned from his mistakes, and yet Asher couldn’t do that. They were wired differently. And maybe those different experiences were what had shaped Asher to become this other person. The kind of man who’d go hunting a missing kid and protect that kid no matter what.

  Jayden turned toward the door. “I’ll be back.”

  No one spoke, which considering how loud and obnoxious their family could be was a major miracle.

  He emerged onto the porch and sucked down a deep breath. The neighbors had mowed recently, and that was all he could smell.

  Asher and Nicole turned to look at him.

  He stared back for a moment, then headed towards them.

  Neither spoke, but they did turn to face him as he closed the distance.

  Jayden locked eyes with Asher. “If I promise to say nothing, will you tell me the whole story? Beginning to end?”

  Asher’s brows rose. “You want to know?”

  “I want to listen.”

  He glanced at Nicole, who merely shrugged.

  “Okay.” Asher leaned against the passenger door of Nicole’s car. “Keyon is like a little mini me. He’s six, fearless, and has a nose for
trouble. I knew his mom from a friend who rented a place from her. She’s got one of those houses with apartments, or whatever. I’m supposed to sublet a place in her building once my lease is up. Anyway, I popped by one night to help fix some stuff around the unit I’d be moving into, and everyone was out front crying for Keyon.”

  Nicole leaned a hip against the hood of her car next to Asher. “Poor kid.”

  “Last anyone saw of Keyon was early that day.” He lifted his gaze and looked at Jayden. “We went door to door, looking in every car, dumpster, trash can, drain. A group of us kept looking all night. Next day I woke up from a nap with an idea to check with the tenants again. Thing was, this time I didn’t knock. I just took the keys and let myself in. I had a feeling. I found a guy living on the second floor with Keyon. The kid was tied up in a closet. He’d hung blankets on the walls to muffle the kid’s sounds, but he left the door open at some point. His mom says the doctors looked him over. Nothing had happened yet. Keyon was just scared. He didn’t understand what was happening, but I did.”

  Jayden’s stomach rolled. He fought the urge to bend over and vomit.

  And something similar had happened to Asher around the same age.

  Fucking hell.

  “That’s when you beat up the guy?” Nicole asked.

  “No, that’s when he attacked me. I was defending myself and Keyon...but I got out of hand.” Asher locked eyes with Jayden. “Mom always did say we had our dad’s temper.”

  Jayden nodded.

  When he got angry, his blinders came out.

  When Asher got angry, he fought.

  They were both imperfect people. The only difference was that Jayden lashed out at those closest to him, while Asher went after strangers.

  Who was the real monster?

  Jayden swallowed and mustered the nerve to meet Nicole’s gaze. “How is she? Really?”

  Nicole crossed her arms over her chest. An unexpected hardness glinted in her eyes. “I don’t think you get to ask that question.”

  He nodded.

  “Come on, boo.” Asher nudged Nicole with his elbow.

  “Don’t come on, boo, me.” Now she glared at Asher. “You...saw.”

  The hair on the back of Jayden’s neck stood up. “You’ve been to their house?”

  “Calm yourself.” Asher held up a hand. “I went by to check on them after I heard how things went down.”

  Jayden bit the inside of his mouth to keep from asking for details.

  “Your girl’s really pissed at you, bro.” Asher’s stare bored into Jayden’s skull.

  It was a little strange that Asher was the one who’d nearly beaten a man to death and just got out of prison, yet it was Jayden stewing in the wrong.

  “How do I fix this? Do I deserve to? Would she be happier without me?” he asked, speaking his thoughts out loud.

  His heart wanted Brandi. That was the simple truth of it. No, she didn’t fit his vision for his immediate future, but she fit him. That was what mattered. Plans changed, shifted or got abandoned. But people? They were irreplaceable.

  “What are you saying? Do I deserve to? Would she be happier without me?” Nicole huffed. “Give me a break and get over yourself.”

  “Damn, girl, you’re savage when you’re on fire.”

  “Don’t forget it,” she said with sass that reminded Jayden of Brandi.

  Nicole focused back on Jayden. “She needs more time. Brandi...she’s moved into angry. You don’t want to get within ten city blocks of her right now. Probably not for a few days. She goes from stunned to sad and mopey then to angry. Stunned, sad and angry are manageable. But angry? Give her space.”

  Damn.

  There went his flimsy plan to drive there now.

  “I think... I think I’m going home.” Jayden glanced at his car. “Asher, would you come by later? Doesn’t have to be today or tomorrow. Just, sometime?”

  “Let’s go now.”

  “You don’t have to.” He nodded at the house. “Everyone’s here to see you.”

  “Yeah, they’ll be okay.” Asher slid a toothpick back between his lips. “Besides, someone’s going to have to talk you off whatever ledge you’re thinking yourself onto.”

  “Just so you aren’t surprised...” Nicole cringed slightly. “Brandi and I just came from your place. She might have left you a parting present.”

  Jayden’s stomach plummeted.

  This was a disaster of his own making. All this pain and suffering, he’d caused it.

  “Thanks, Nicole.” Asher held out his hand.

  Nicole glanced from his hand to his face and back, then shook hands. Asher transitioned smoothly, and Jayden was willing to bet Nicole had no idea Asher had intended something completely different by the gesture.

  He held onto Nicole’s hand a moment longer. “Need anything, give me a holler, okay?”

  She nodded. “Okay.”

  “I mean it.”

  Nicole patted his shoulder, then extracted her other hand. “And I heard you the first time.”

  Asher turned and stood next to Jayden. Together they watched Nicole get in her car and leave, back to Brandi.

  “Have I always been an asshole?” Jayden asked.

  Asher smacked his shoulder. “Nah, man. Only every now and then. Rest of the time you’re okay.”

  Still, that was too often.

  Here Jayden had thought he was ready to move forward with his life and take the next step. In reality, he might not be ready for a relationship. He could still need to work on himself, so maybe in the future he’d be the kind of man worth standing beside. Because, right now, Jayden didn’t like himself very much.

  “You got a plan?” Asher asked.

  “She left something we worked on together at my place. That’s what Nicole was warning me about. Brandi... She deserves better than me.”

  “Bro, there isn’t better than you. Yeah, you piss me off when you get literal. You could stand to cut people a little more slack. But that doesn’t make you a bad apple. It makes you human. And thank God for the rest of us.” Asher chuckled and shook his head.

  “That doesn’t change the fact that I made Brandi cry.”

  “Then you have to do a big apology. I’m talking,” Asher pivoted and held his arms out, “this big.”

  Jayden studied his brother. “Why are you helping me?”

  “Because you’re my brother. I also like this girl. I think she might be tough enough to call you on your shit and make you see it. Besides, I didn’t realize how much I needed to see a friendly face when I did. I owe her. And she seems to be really into you, or she wouldn’t be as mad as she is. When someone is that mad, they care. So, get ready to grovel.”

  Day 27: Saturday

  Brandi squinted at the booths squeezed under the tin awning. She still wasn’t convinced she was in the mood to window shop flea markets. But this was what they did on normal Saturday mornings, so here they were. Even if Brandi’s heart wasn’t really into it.

  Monday Nicole had proposed an idea through text. Every morning and evening she’d ask Brandi to take her emotional temperature. Each day when it came time to talk about the break-up and total lack of communication from Jayden, Brandi got angry. She’d spent most of the week in a rage. She’d even deep cleaned Nicole’s bathroom, and that was something she rarely ever touched.

  Then last night happened.

  She’d flopped on the sofa after getting home and hadn’t moved.

  When it came time, she couldn’t muster the energy to care. Yes, she was still sad. Some part of her had bought into the idea she could be with Jayden for more than a flash in the pan. And that part of her was broken and grieving. Her anger was burnt out. All that was left was to heal now. And that would take time. A lot of it.

  Nicole’s sigh sliced through Brandi’s emotional fog. “Have you drank any of your latte?”

  She glanced down at the paper cup. “No, I’ve drank some.”

  Brandi hurriedly gulped the lukewarm liqu
id in the hopes that Nicole wouldn’t want to weigh the cup.

  “Right.” She sighed and shook her head. “Also, Asher said, you haven’t responded to his text.”

  Shit.

  Brandi dug in her purse for her phone and winced when she realized she’d completely ignored the text.

  Probably because thinking about Asher inevitably led to Jayden. It wasn’t Asher’s fault. To Brandi they looked nothing alike. But they were brothers. And Asher didn’t shy away from mentioning Jayden.

  “Shoot,” she muttered and tapped out a quick apology.

  When she was done Nicole threaded her arm through Brandi’s and held her close. “How are you doing? Really? I know I’ve pestered you about your feelings all week, I just thought you’d...I don’t know, want to talk more?”

  Probably because Brandi had been stuffing all those feelings down deep. She hadn’t wanted to talk about it then or now, but she needed to.

  “I guess... I’m still angry, but most of all I’m just sad now. I mean, I did everything possible to not get involved with him. Then I give in and we fall apart in like a week. I feel so silly for caring this much about him or getting involved or...”

  “Don’t be mad about that. At least not at yourself.” Nicole stopped them in the middle of the walkway and stared at Brandi. “You took the chance to have something beautiful. You two really complimented each other. I hate that it’s turned out like this. I mean, I would have had bragging rights for a lifetime otherwise.”

  Brandi’s heart ached at the implied forever. She peered up at the sky, hoping the bright morning light might cure her urge to bawl in public.

  “At least I can’t blame myself this time,” she said softly. “That’s such a huge relief. I hadn’t realized how much I was carrying around the fear that I was totally broken. I didn’t sabotage it like I’ve done every other relationship. I wasn’t going to sit there and let something good pass me by. I tried. And it hurts that it didn’t work out, but...I’ll get over this. And maybe the next time I try to date someone, it’ll work.”

  Right?

  A small, quiet voice in her head begged Nicole to reassure her, because right now it felt like these wounds went deep. So deep it would take Brandi a long time to heal.

  “You’ll get there.” Nicole laid her head on Brandi’s shoulder and tugged her forward.