Broken (Soldiers of Darkness MC Book 1)

by Michelle Betham

  Just thinking about that night causes the almost constant anger I’ve been feeling for so long now to rise up again, like a fire in my belly that can’t be extinguished. Not yet. Not until I’ve finished the job. But I really can’t do it on my own. So I have to suck up any lingering nerves and get the answers I need. I have to find the help I’m looking for. Whatever it takes, I have to do it. But as I close my eyes, and think about what just happened in there – my first encounter with Mack Slayer – I begin to wonder exactly what it is I might have to do before I can finally start living again.

  Chapter Four

  Mack

  ‘Someone to see you, boss.’

  I glance up from my paper and throw Duke a look that tells him I need a bit more information than that.

  ‘A woman.’

  That narrows the sex down, I suppose. ‘Any woman in particular?’ Christ, it’s like pulling teeth, and I ain’t got time for this. I’ve got another meeting with Viper in an hour. The Soldiers of Darkness are on board, and tonight’s our first run. I’m sending a few of our brothers out with Viper’s crew – two gangs are better than one, not that we’re expecting any trouble. The deal’s a done one. Hand the shit over and get outta there. But you can never be too careful in this business. Trust no fucker, that’s my motto. Always be on your guard. It’s the only way.

  Duke shrugs a reply to my question and I roll my eyes and let out a heavy sigh, because I really don’t have time for this. She’s probably just another MC mama wanting a job and a way in to our club. We get ‘em here all the time.

  I look back down at my paper. ‘If it’s work she’s after, tell her to stop by Laney’s tonight.’

  ‘You want me to tell her that?’

  I sigh again and fix Duke with a withering look. ‘I just fucking said so, didn’t I? Go on, get outta here. I’m busy.’

  Duke retreats, leaving me alone in the chapel. Which is how I like it sometimes.

  ‘For fuck’s sake…’

  I look up at the sound of a voice I remember hearing only hours earlier. That unfamiliar accent. And there she is, last night’s mystery lady, all long legs and hard face, her hair pulled back into a loose, messed-up pony tail, which makes her look a lot younger than she did yesterday. She doesn’t seem to have much make-up on either, which is a nice change. Usually you can’t get to the face for the foundation on some of the women who hang around here. Not that it matters half the time. Who’s looking at the mantelpiece when you’re poking the fire?

  ‘You after somethin’, darlin’?’

  She stops in the doorway, and I let my eyes wander up from her knee-high boots to the hem of her ass-skimming denim skirt. Her legs are freakin’ incredible, from what I can see of them; toned and tanned and I want to find out what she’s got between them. I want to thrust my fingers inside her and play with her; make her come until she screams so loud the whole town’ll hear. And I swear I only want her this bad because I know she ain’t gonna be easy. Women fall at my feet – fact. But it don’t feel like this one is gonna. And I hate myself for even thinking about accepting the challenge she’s unwittingly throwing in my direction, but that’s exactly what I’m gonna do. Whether she likes it or not.

  ‘I need your help.’

  I stand up and lean back against the long wooden table that sits in the middle of the chapel. ‘You need my help?’ I raise an eyebrow, because now I’m curious.

  She nods, and I see no fear on her face. But I’m guessing that she does actually know who I am. You don’t ask for help from a total stranger; from someone like me. So she knows who I am, or she wouldn’t be here.

  ‘Close the door.’

  She does as I say, kicking the door shut behind her before she walks over to me. And she doesn’t stop until she’s almost right up in my face, which I find so fucking hot, man, I ain’t ever experienced a woman with balls like this one. I come to them, they don’t come to me.

  ‘Do you remember a shoot out that happened just over a year ago? In a bar just a few miles outside of town?’

  I’m even more curious now. I remember that shoot out. It hadn’t taken place in one of our bars, it wasn’t even on our patch. It happened in a place which is very much Viper’s crew’s territory, not ours. I don’t know exactly what happened that night, or what had caused it, it had fuck all to do with us, and I don’t get involved in stuff that don’t concern us, not if I think it could bring trouble to our door. But I’m already getting a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. This girl’s quite obviously here for a reason. She’s come to me for a reason. And I’m about to find out what that reason is. I’m just not sure I’m gonna like it.

  I shrug as I try to read her expression, but she’s got a great poker face. I can’t read shit. ‘A couple of innocents were killed, as far as I can remember…’

  ‘And nobody paid for that.’

  Her voice is like cold steel, and I feel that small flurry of wariness hit me in the gut all over again. Something ain’t right here. ‘There wasn’t enough evidence, darlin’… Look, what’s all this…?’

  ‘My father. My fiancé. They were those “innocents”, as you put it. They were the ones who were gunned down in cold blood. For no fucking reason. They’re dead because of little boys playing dangerous games and nobody fucking paid for that.’

  ‘Hey, darlin’, quit taking your shit out on me, OK? I had nothing to do with what happened so if you’re looking for someone to blame…’

  ‘I’m looking for answers.’

  I stare at her through narrowed eyes. She’s hot, ain’t no denying that, but she’s also a stranger I know nothing about, and this just don’t feel right. ‘Listen, darlin’, you got some balls, barging in here like this, because I don’t take too kindly to strangers just walking into my clubhouse. But you got away with it because my brothers out there, they think with their dicks. They don’t care who you are or why you’re here because you’re giving them something new to think about when they jerk off in the shower. I’m different…’

  ‘Are you?’

  She takes me by surprise as she steps forward, inching that little bit closer to me, and I realize I’m no different at all, not at this very second, anyway. I can feel my cock begin to harden as her warm breath hits my cheek. Shit! Ain’t no woman ever made me feel this exposed. But that’s because no woman has ever challenged me. No woman has ever questioned me or refused me anything. I can have any fucking woman I want, but this one – I don’t know about this one. And I actually find that freakin’ exciting!

  I smile, a slow smile, the kind that usually reels ‘em in, but I know she ain’t gonna be that easy. And I’m right, as my smile is met with a wall of – nothing. She is damn cold! I’m almost shivering here.

  And then she steps back, giving me a chance to redeem some power. As hot as she is, I’m not gonna have her walk in here and demand shit.

  ‘What answers are you looking for, darlin’? Because I’m guessing you’ve come a long way to find ‘em.’

  I know that my initial thoughts about this girl, the ones I had the second I saw her in Laney’s last night, I know they’re right. No matter what kinda front she’s putting up here, I don’t think she could be any further away from the world she’s used to. This ain’t her kinda place. That half-sleeve tattoo on her forearm, I don’t think it’s been there all that long, and I’m not even sure that hair color’s her own. And I can see in her face – despite the image she’s trying to portray – I can see this ain’t her world. This woman standing in front of me, this might very well be who she is now, but I’m not convinced it’s who she’s always been.

  ‘I know the people who killed my dad; the people who killed Aiden – I know they were bikers.’

  I raise an eyebrow, keeping my arms folded. ‘You know?’

  ‘I know.’

  I wait a second, to see if she’s going to impart any more information on just how she knows, but it seems she ain’t willing to do that. I can only assume she’s the kinda girl who
’s done her homework, and then I try not to imagine her in a school uniform, her tits straining at the material of her shirt, no panties on underneath her skirt… I try, but I’m not exactly succeeding.

  ‘And I know your club had nothing to do with it.’

  Her voice yanks me back from my daydream, and I look at her. Her eyes refuse to leave mine, and I still can’t get my head around the steel-edged nerve she’s got. Most guys wouldn’t be this forward with me, and they certainly wouldn’t get away with barging in here like she’s done. But this girl has my attention. And that makes her unique.

  ‘But you don’t know which club did?’

  I watch her expression change, just slightly, but enough for her to display a momentary sliver of weakness. She doesn’t even have to say anything, I can see the answer on her face. Of course she doesn’t know which club was responsible. That’s why she’s here.

  ‘What exactly do you want me to do, darlin’?’

  She drops her gaze for the briefest of beats before her head snaps back up, her eyes once more hard and cold. ‘I want you to help me find out who killed the two most important people in my life.’

  ‘Don’t I even get a please?’ I’m being flippant, I know, but I can’t help it.

  ‘I’m told there isn’t anyone you don’t know in this town.’

  She ignores my flippancy, which I’m fine with. I can understand she has no sense of humor right now. ‘There isn’t. But that bar, it’s a little out of my – jurisdiction, shall we say.’ Only just.

  ‘There aren’t that many motorcycle clubs around here.’

  My eyebrow arches again. She really has done her homework. ‘If you did know who’d done it…’ I wasn’t gonna ask this question, but I’m kinda intrigued to know the answer now. I’ve a feeling it might give me a bit more of an insight into what this girl is about, ‘would you have bothered coming to me?’

  ‘I wouldn’t have needed to, would I?’

  ‘Listen, darlin’… Jesus, what’s your name? I think you owe me that, at least, considering you’re in my clubhouse uninvited.’

  She holds my gaze for another couple of loaded beats. ‘Izzi.’

  Nice name. Suits her. And I actually think it’s her real one. But probably the only real thing about her. ‘OK then, Izzi… Look, what are we talking about here, huh? You want me to find out who killed your dad and fiancé, and then what? Once you know who took ‘em out, what’re you planning to do then?’

  ‘I’m planning on getting my life back.’

  I laugh, and not because I’m confused by what she’s just said there. I laugh because I know what she means. And that bad feeling I had before, it’s back.

  ‘And how do you plan on doing that?’ I already know her answer, but I want to hear her say the words. Only then will I know just how serious she really is.

  ‘An eye for an eye.’ Her voice is low and so quiet I have to strain to make the words out. And as I look at her, her expression as stoic as it’s possible to be, I know. She’s serious.

  I drop my head and close my eyes for a second, just in case this is some crazy dream, borne out of me still fantasizing about her from last night; the woman who caused me to hide in a bathroom stall and jerk off until I came all over the floor. I ain’t ever done that kinda thing before. And all I’d had to do was look at her. So is this not just some horny hallucination? But when I open my eyes and raise my gaze she’s still there, that same icy expression still fixed on her face.

  ‘I can’t let you do that, honey.’

  ‘You can’t stop me.’

  As hot as she is, my patience is kinda wearing thin now. ‘You come into my clubhouse, into my town, and you threaten to kick-start shit you can’t even begin to understand… I’ll make it my fucking mission to stop you, darlin’. You want my help, you want me to find out who killed your family, yeah, OK, I’ll help you with that. It’s the least I can do. But once we find the answers you’re looking for, you go home. You go back to England and you move on.’

  ‘Fuck you!’

  Whoa! Is she kidding me? Did I just hear her right? ‘Listen to me, sweetheart…’

  ‘Maybe I don’t need your help.’

  I watch as she turns on her heels and opens the door, but she ain’t going nowhere. I’m not done with her yet, not by a long shot. And now I know what she’s here for, no way am I letting her loose out there in my town. She ain’t safe, no matter how tough she thinks she is.

  I grab her arm and pull her back into the room, elbowing the door shut behind me.

  ‘Let go of me!’ She hisses the words out, her blue eyes dark as they stare me down. But she won’t win this one. She came to me, she asked for my help, and now I know why she’s here it’s my duty to keep her safe. From herself. Because she don’t know what the fuck she could be getting herself into. And I don’t need the shit her messing with crap she don’t understand could create. I’ve enough to deal with keeping this club on its feet.

  ‘You promise me you ain’t gonna run off and go all Lara Croft on me?’

  ‘Don’t patronize me, Mack.’

  I look at her, and I allow a slow smirk to spread across my face. She knows my name. She does know who I am. So, to some extent, she must know what she’s doing. ‘I ain’t being patronizing, darlin’. I’m just tryin’ to keep you alive.’

  I loosen my grip on her, which allows her to wrench her arm free and step back from me. But she doesn’t attempt to make a second run for it. Instead, she leans back against the wall, her expression beginning to soften as she looks at me. ‘I’m sorry.’

  An apology. I have to say, I wasn’t expecting that.

  ‘I came here to ask for your help, but beyond that…’

  I cock my head slightly as I wait for her to finish that sentence. But she doesn’t. She starts a whole new one.

  ‘I need them dead, Mack. The people who killed my dad and Aiden, I need them dead.’

  All of a sudden I realize the kinda help she really came here to ask me for. And I don’t know what to tell her. I really don’t…

  Izzi

  Am I scared? Yeah. I’m scared. I’m fucking terrified! But at the same time I’m more determined than ever that what I came here to do, it’s going to happen. With or without Mack Slayer’s help. But, for now, I need to keep him on side. He’s the only one who can help me find out who killed Dad and Aiden. Whether he can help me finish the job, I guess I’ll have to wait and see what happens on that score.

  ‘You want me to help you kill them?’

  I look at him, and as he asks that question his disbelieving tone is evident. ‘I just want them dead.’ My voice is little more than a whisper. I’m tired now. Exhaustion I haven’t allowed to take hold since I arrived in this town is threatening to sweep over me, but I need to keep it at bay, just for a little while longer.

  ‘Baby, you have no idea…’

  ‘You’re patronizing me again.’ And he is. I know he thinks I don’t belong in his world, and maybe I didn’t, before. A year ago I wouldn’t have wanted to be a part of his world, but now I am. And I need to be here. I’ve done my research, changed who I was so I could fit in; be that person I needed to be in order to live the life I needed to live. It’s the only way I can get close to the people whose lives I intend to end in as brutal a way as I can. Right now, I belong here. And he better start believing that; better start believing I’m serious. He might think I’m weak, but I’m not. The things I’ve had to learn to make sure I can do what I’ve come here to do; the lengths I’ve had to go to, the people I’ve had to seek out – he better believe I’m serious.

  ‘I gotta be somewhere in a bit, sweetheart. But we ain’t done yet.’

  He got that right. We are so far from done.

  ‘I need you to stay here, you got that?’

  I narrow my eyes as I look at him. I’ve got every intention of going home, of curling up in my huge, comfortable bed and sleeping for at least a couple of days. I need my energy back, and then I can really g
et to work. ‘I’m going home.’ He shakes his head and laughs and I feel a frisson of anger well up inside me. ‘You can’t keep me prisoner here.’

  ‘Believe me, darlin’ there is nothing I’d like more than to keep you prisoner.’ He moves closer to me, so close I can smell the stale cigarettes and traces of alcohol on his breath. ‘But you’re right. I can’t make you stay here. But I can at least try to keep you safe. You’re a visitor in my town. Keeping you safe is the least I can do. Now, I don’t know who you’ve been talking to, but believe me, sweetheart, word spreads fast around here. Small town and all that. And if word has got out about the real reason for our pretty stranger’s visit; if even the smallest and vaguest of rumors is already circulating, then I can’t guarantee that somebody connected to the death of your daddy and your fiancé – I can’t guarantee that somebody ain’t gonna come after you. You made this my business, Izzi. I didn’t ask for it, and Christ knows I can do without it, but you made it my business by coming to me. So, from now on, you want my help, we do things my way. You got that?’

  ‘And if I don’t want your help?’ Why did I say that? I can be so stubborn sometimes. It’s a trait my dad always said I’d inherited from him. It’s not that I want Mack’s help, God knows if I could do this alone I would. Which is my stubbornness coming through once again. But I can’t do it alone, and I know that. So, I might not want Mack’s help, but I need it. So I have to suck it up and do things his way. To a point. If he thinks it’s going to be all one way traffic he is so wrong. Over this past year I’ve learned how to turn on the bitch from hell, and I am so ready to be that person.

  ‘You’re getting my help whether you want it or not, darlin’. So you’re staying here. You can have one of the rooms out back. Take a shower, sleep some of that attitude off. And when I get back we’ll talk. OK?’

  I stare into his gun-metal-gray eyes and swallow down another smart remark. I’ve also learned when to keep my mouth shut. So I nod, and he steps back from me, and the fact my stomach dips slightly when he does that, I find it a touch unsettling. But I put it down to tiredness. I’ve waited so long for this moment, when I had to face Mack Slayer and ask for his help. But now I’ve done that it’s almost as though I’ve silently given that exhaustion permission to take hold now.