You're Not Alone

by Shanade White

  Kimberly stirred when the warm arm was draped over her and for a moment, was confused. Was there someone in her bed? Eyes cracking open painfully, she was met by Richard’s sympathetic pools of blue, watching her, protecting her. It was a mystery to her that there was a man in her bed- her boss at that and she sat upright violently and with a horrified inquiring look.

  “Good morning. How are you feeling?” Richard asked quietly.

  “My head aches and I was having a little trouble remembering what happened yesterday, but I remember now.” Staring him directly in the eye, she added, “All of it.”

  Despite her headache, Kimberly smiled at Richard coyly and he returned it.

  “Is it something you want to discuss Kim? Or do we just leave it as is?”

  Sliding off the bed with the sheet tucked around the breasts and hips, he had kissed and sucked last night, she turned to him and said. “Slow down Hun, only women want to discuss feelings after sex.”

  It was a joke, and though he laughed, Richard was stung that he appeared so vulnerable to the woman he was falling for. Kim softened her tone and gaze as she added, “There is nothing to discuss Richard. Let nature take its course.”

  Like the undercover vixen Kimberly was, she let the sheet fall to the floor and in the natural sunlight, revealed the curvaceous silhouette Richard yearned to touch once again.

  Walking to the bathroom and pausing by the door, Kimberly glanced over her shoulder as she dropped a statement and instruction balled into one.

  “You are the boss, so I shouldn’t have to spell things out for you.”

  It was only seconds before Richard was off the bed and standing behind her, willing to do nature’s bidding.

  *****

  Four weeks and two days had passed since Aunt Audrey’s burial and Kimberly and Richard made sweet love almost daily after that. Sometimes it was in her office when all the others left. Other times it was in the backseat of his limo when she allowed him to escort her home.

  The couplings were hot and desperate. Always trying to quench a thirst that did not want to be quenched. Their interactions were not merely physical, but often bordered on tantric. Richard smelled her when she wasn’t there, he heard her voice long after she had left a room. Kimberly was not only filling his bed, she was filling his heart. This was the primary reason he was having lunch with her today.

  Golden Goose was a farm to table restaurant in the south of California. Seafood was a staple, but they trucked their meats and veggies down from the farmers who spent their time tilling the soil.

  Quaint and unassuming, it hid in the back of a large casino and the two existed peacefully. He had used the private plane for his special announcement and hoped all would go well. Kimberly wore yellow today- well it was more mustard. Insisting she take a personal day off, Richard was pleased that she quickly adapted to the sunshine of California in her strapless flowing dress that still couldn’t hide her remarkable figure. She wore toe rings and this was the first time he had noticed. Flip flops on her were just as sexy on her as heels.

  Calling ahead of time, Richard made sure they were dining in seclusion. The only private balcony available was bathed in sunlight and waiting on its guests. Kimberly was more than ready to get cozy. Richard had a knot in his stomach.

  “It warms my heart to see you smiling Kim. You have no idea.”

  “My aunt would have wanted it. She was a proud woman but she was wise. Life goes on.”

  They sat solemnly as the sad moment passed before Richard broke the silence.

  “There is an event I’d like you to attend with me this weekend.”

  Kimberly looked up from her inspection of her wine, a little surprised. Up until now they had kept their interactions a secret. Only the chauffeur knew they went places together outside of work. Even then, he could only suspect.

  “Are you sure you are ready for that? They are lots of cameras at these things. Our pictures will be everywhere.”

  Sighing, Richard reassured her that the paparazzi would not be a challenge in this instance.

  “Actually the media won’t be a concern where we are going. We are having a family reunion. I want you there.”

  He had Kimberly’s full attention. This was definitely going to take them to a whole new level

  “I don’t know about that Richard. I know we haven’t discussed it thoroughly, but your mother doesn’t seem to keen our being friendly. When I’m in her personal space she may be a bit more vocal.”

  “My mother isn’t an issue. The old woman simply is bored and means no harm. Plus, I want you to know I am not taking this thing between you and I casually. You’re on my mind from the time I wake up until I go to bed. I want to inhale you and keep you in my lungs. I need you in my life.”

  Closing his palm over hand on the table, he massaged her fingers and looked deeply into her eyes. Kimberly was convinced that he was being sincere. When he launched into his next statement, things changed.

  “Because I so strongly believe in you and me, there is something else I want to share with you.”

  She wasn’t aware she had stopped breathing, but Kimberly’s chest ceased to rise and fall as she waited for his next words.

  “There is someone near and dear to me that I have not told you about. It was to protect her and not to scare you away. We have been though a lot together, her and I, but now that I can clearly see what type of woman you are, I want you to meet her.”

  The bastard had a girlfriend or wife?! Kimberly’s once smooth palm became slick with sweat and confusion. Richard had a girlfriend but still wanted her to attend a family gathering. She was lost until he continued.

  “My daughter Jasmine is beautiful and smart and I want her to meet the special woman in her father’s life.”

  The sweat on Kimberly’s palm increased.

  *****

  Richard had lied to her. He had chosen to keep a life changing secret from her and Kimberly felt betrayed. This was why Kimberly had stopped dating in the first place. Men were never what they appeared to be. All were selfish just like Kimberly’s absent father.

  “Why would you keep something like this from me?” Kimberly asked as she slipped her hand from Richard’s and wiped it in a dinner napkin. Pausing for the petite waitress to place the beef Wellington and glazed carrots on the table, Richard only spoke when she disappeared through the beaded curtain separating them from the main dining hall.

  “Please don’t be angry Kimberly. It wasn’t a lie. I have suffered at the hands of a few women who pretended to be in it for the long haul, and then they disappear after a few tennis bracelets.”

  His voice became deep and authoritative. The contents of his next statement though, may have been the last scoop of dirt on his grave.

  “Sure, you have had issues and though I didn’t grow up poor, I suffered pain too. Suffering is not committed to one race or social status!”

  Kimberly’s neck coiled. The statement may have been innocent but the fact that he was mentioning race and social status led her to believe that Richard thought she used her past and culture as a crutch. Kimberly didn’t accept pity from anyone. A small voice inside her whispered, “Maybe he didn’t mean it that way. Wouldn’t you want to protect your child too before you brought someone new home?” Kimberly answered herself silently. “I can’t have children though. I would mess them up the same way Camilla did me. This is my exit point.”

  The pangs of guilt and embers of anger glowed as Kimberly ate her meal in silence, ignoring Richard’s pleas to talk to him.

  *****

  Kimberly was a professional and nothing outside of work would stop her from delivering a stellar performance. It was Friday and she was due in court. Via email, she had informed Richard of the proceedings and her final argument. He made a few changes and gave her his blessing. Visibly absent from the office for the past few days, Richard decided that maybe a little time apart was best. He called a few times to test the waters. Kim didn’t answer.

&nb
sp; The wormy lawyers were there and the stammers were coming hard and fast as they painted a tainted picture of Tabletop. Negligent, dismissive and even combative were used to describe their company policies. Kimberly suspected bruised egos after they were nearly escorted from the building.

  When it was her turn, Attorney at law, Kimberly Walsh spoke clearly and concisely. The truth could not be questioned after expert witnesses confirmed that Mrs. Thomas was definitely at fault for her fall. Doctors for her, engineers for them, the experts spoke without reservation about their findings. It was the last doctor who revealed new information. The injured woman had been drinking just before she fell into the chair, drunken and unstable.

  In her final appeal to the jury for justice, Attorney Walsh spoke about honesty and truth, sincerity and transparency. It was when she got to the last part that she didn’t believe it was written by her own hand.

  “Look inside yourselves and ask this question, 'Can we forgive this woman?'”

  The ‘not guilty’ verdict was back in an hour and Tabletop’s side of the court erupted in cheers of joy. They had won, but Kimberly felt like a hypocrite. Appealing to the jury for forgiveness toward a woman who had lied and wasted the court's time, all the while she punished a man who had shown her nothing but love.

  *****

  Fifteen minutes past four and the red sports car was gunning down the highway. The wind zipped pass Kimberly’s hair as she passed cars going nowhere. She, however, was on a mission. Richard’s estate sat on a plot of land just on the outskirts of the bustling city. She had been there once, late at night for a drink. How did she not know he had a daughter? Feeling low and very angry at her own childish tantrum, she pushed the accelerator even harder. It was in a cloud of dust that she arrived at the gates and wasted time talking to the security.

  Who was she? What did she want with Mr. Damask? He had not mentioned he was expecting her. The large men in dark suits watched as she dialed Richard’s number. He answered on the first ring. Maybe he was waiting for her call.

  “Tell your security people to let me through. I want to speak to you… now.”

  Without responding, the line went dead and the majestic white and gold gates swung open. The security men stepped aside and Kimberly was admitted to the castle guarding her Prince Charming.

  Richard waited on the steps of his mansion, pacing back and forth, glancing at the approaching red car. Screeching to a halt only inches from the fountain in the middle of the brick layered driveway, the vehicle stopped and Kimberly sprang from the driver’s seat. Never one to be reserved once she was convicted in her decision, Kimberly made quick work of bounding up the stairs before closing her arms around Richard’s neck and rubbing her wet face into his cheek.

  “Richard I am so sorry. I am sorry I reacted so harshly. I don’t want you to go away. Your daughter… Jasmine… I can get to know her…”

  He stopped her sentence by pulling away from her embrace. Hurt and disappointed he gazed into her brown eyes. He started to speak and then stopped again before blurting out. “This is why I don’t date. You fall in love with someone and then one hiccup and they are gone.” His voice lowered considerably before he added, “I really wanted you to be different.”

  Kimberly’s face turned from sadness to seriousness as she answered. Walking over to a wicker patio chair and pouring herself slowly into it, she matched his solemn tone.

  “You know, you and I play for the same team. I try so much to keep people out, try so hard to be strong, try so viciously to protect those we love. Sometimes it’s that same passion that kills the very things we hold dear. It is because of that one fact that I am afraid of being anyone’s mother. I have scars deep and raw that I don’t want to pass on to anyone. The girl I once was survived, but she’s battered.”

  Quietly, Richard spoke as he gazed into the distance. The sun was setting and the light on the patio was orange.

  “Why can’t you see yourself the way I see you? Humble beginnings, but strong resolve, ambitious, proud, forthright… and damn sexy. The old you is dead. You need to see yourself as you truly are… and that’s absolutely remarkable.” Joining her on the two seater lounge he added a now familiar statement, “We are sitting in the present so we can stand in the future.”

  Their eyes locked and held. It was Richard who initiated the kiss, but it was Kimberly who took it to the next level. Both were hungry for the touches and kisses that were withheld and stored for the past few days.

  Tires rolling down the driveway made them come up for air. A black town car driven by a burly white man came to a stop and a tall, slender woman emerged, not waiting for the driver to open the door. Rushing to the other side, he was in time to pull the handle before a raven haired little girl leapt to her feet. It seemed that regardless of her readiness, Kimberly would be meeting Richard’s most precious possession.

  *****

  Barbara trailed her daughter who bounded up the steps, her sneakers hitting the tiled stairs two at a time.

  “Daddy!” She yelled, as she jumped into his outstretched arms. This was his treasure. The woman behind bore striking resemblance to Jasmine and it didn’t take a scientist to determine that this was her mother.

  Richards ex wife was a thin woman with soft features. Her raven hair fell to her waist. Though well maintained, she seemed unaware of her beauty.

  After the father and daughter reunion, Richard lowered his daughter to the ground and cleared his throat. He always did that when he was nervous. Stepping closer to Kimberly and bringing Jasmine with him, he knelt to be on the child’s level.

  “Sweet heart, I want you to meet someone special to daddy. You will be seeing her around more often and I would like it if you two could be friends.”

  Jasmine looked up optimistically and threw Richard’s killer smile Kimberly’s way. Stretching out her hand like a young business mogul she said, “Hello my name is Jasmine. What’s yours?”

  Glancing at the still silent mother and Jasmine’s anxious father, Kimberly grasped the small girl’s hand and said, “My name is Kimberly. I am so very happy to meet you.”

  Jasmine’s face lit up in a smile decorated with pink braces before she disappeared inside for ice cream. The housekeeper was very intuitive and sensed the adults needed time alone.

  The exchange of words between the adults was short and simple. Everyone walked away with a sense of who played what role. Kimberly was glad that there was a cordial but silent agreement. Baby mamma drama was something she had heard about but never cared to experience. Brenda was alright in her books. Never being one to impose, and especially since this was all too new, Kimberly decided it would be best to go home, but Richard said she could leave only under one condition.

  “Come with me tomorrow Kimberly, I need you in my life.”

  Bowing her head and staring at their clasped hands she whispered, “I will come where ever you need me to. You never have to ask me that again.”

  Chapter 8

  The elegance of Damask estates was heightened by strung lights around trees, small reflective pools of color dotting the lawn and the flamboyance of the people already in attendance. This family was large and well established. It had doctors, lawyers and businessmen- all earning more than a six figure salary and all white.

  Usually the prospect of a lone black face in a pool of white ones would never trouble Richard’s mind, but tonight it did. Lena was already there with her contingent of black maids and he had a sick feeling in his stomach. She insisted on planning the family reunion and because things had picked up after the trial, he relented.

  Lena had a special way of getting things done and it was never pleasant. Barking, insulting and belittling all took a part in her strategy of command. It was ugly to watch. Richard had insisted that Kimberly stay at home and arrive with all the other guests.

  She had insisted on helping of course, but a delivery man bearing a gift card from Supreme Sauna and Spa changed her mind. The chauffeur should have dropped her
off at home 2 hours ago.

  There was glass breaking and loud yelling as Lena ‘assisted’ in laying out the dinner tables. It was time for Richard to intervene. Relieved to find out it was only fallen silver ware, Richard glared at his mother as she hovered over Greta, the maid sobbing as she picked up the knives and forks from the floor.

  With the family from the time he was born, Richard had always admired the way Greta stood under Lena’s pressure but today was different. Today she was crying.

  “Let me help you,” Richard offered as he dropped his height to help the older woman. “I will take care of it, you go help the others on the back lawn.” Cutlery gathered, Richard returned to his full six foot four stance. Lena sensed danger and retreated to the safety of the fridge where she emerged with a bottle of water. When she closed the door of the chrome Whirlpool appliance, Richard towered there, waiting with a warning.

  “Behave yourself old woman. You are my mother, but I will escort you out if you don’t act like a lady- in all regards.”

  Lena’s face drained of color as she desperately clutched the plastic blue bottle. Richard retreated to his room.

  *****

  Kimberly thought this was the best day ever. Surprised during her Saturday overtime by a delivery man, she was still smiling about the relaxing spa day Richard shocked her with.

  How he got into her apartment was what perplexed her the most. There on her bed, was the most stunning white dress imaginable. Apparently Richard liked to see the back of her. The dress, strapless and the top fashioned like a bustier, knotted under her full breasts and flowed into an A line maxi. Her figure could not be hidden.

  A small velvet box fell from the folds of the dress as it was lifted and upon opening it, Kim found a tiny platinum bracelet. Two hearts formed into charms dangled and she finally read the words ‘be mine’ engraved on each one.

  In the limo, Kimberly toyed with her ringlet curls and fidgeted with the charms on her bracelet. Would these people be as accepting of her as Richard? Would Jasmine mind having a black step-mom? Would the dragon witch, Richards’s mother make her life a living hell? Questions without answers filled her head all the way to the estate. As the gates opened, Kim decided that she was good enough as she was.