Confession of an Abandoned Wife - Box Set (Books 1-3)

by Hartstein, Michal

  I wanted to believe that he really missed me, but the years during which we’d lived together-but-separately prevented me believing that this was the real reason. Itay had it all for so many years, and suddenly he didn’t, and he wanted to make it convenient again.

  For my part, I didn't miss my life with Itay. In fact, a lot of the anger that I harbored toward him only intensified. The fact that he didn’t respect our arrangements with the girls tore me up inside. I was sure that the separation would ‘teach him a lesson’ and he’d take the time to see his girls once a week, but, in reality, his work was probably more important, and he missed many of his days with the girls. Either Ahuva took care of the girls, or Zehava, my ex-mother-in-law had them over.

  My life had upgraded since the divorce. First of all, I could spend time with Manny without guilt and without hiding. But beyond that, since I didn’t have a partner, I still did all the usual household chores alone, only now I did them without the anger and outrage that I used to feel from not having any help from my spouse. Now, I had less laundry to do and a little less food to buy and prepare.

  Suddenly, I had a little more time for myself. Every two weeks, Itay took the girls, and every Tuesday I enjoyed having time to myself. Because Itay missed many Tuesdays, occasionally the guilt would eat at him and he’d take the girls on a different night. So since the breakup, I’d had much more time for myself and, of course, time to enjoy my relationship with Manny.

  Saturday, the next day, Manny still hadn’t called. I wanted to call him, but my stupid ego prevented me from dialing. Even though I was the one that had broken up with him, I so wanted him to come after me. Itay had never really pursued me, and I’d missed that. I wanted to be courted. After all, I’d divorced my husband to be with Manny; he could be a little more sensitive.

  The week began full of pain and anger at Manny for not even trying to get back together.

  I had three weeks to vacate the apartment and hadn’t yet found anywhere to go. I hired a moving company and negotiated with a storage facility to store the furniture I didn't intend to leave in the apartment. I didn't want to buy, or even rent, an apartment under pressure, so I’d have to resort to staying temporarily with my parents if nothing turned up. What a depressing thought.

  On Tuesday, Itay surprised me and came early for the girls. Maybe he was trying to prove something, maybe impress me. It didn't work, certainly not after the surprise that awaited me that evening. When I left my belly dancing class, a shiny, black limousine was waiting for me in the street. At first, of course, I didn't imagine the limo was waiting for me. I noticed it the second I left the building because this car was hard to ignore, but when one of the students pointed at me and the limo driver came up to me and invited me to go with him, I realized that I was his passenger.

  I was as excited as a little girl. All my suspicion and defense instincts dissolved the minute the limo driver handed me a rose and held the door open for me to get in the rear compartment of the magnificent limousine.

  I was hoping my benefactor was in the car, but in the back, waiting for me, there was just a huge bouquet of roses. I tore open the note that was fastened to the bouquet. Come to me to celebrate a milestone in our love story. It was the eve of Tu B'Av - Valentine's Day.

  There was no clue to the identity of my suitor, and the driver didn't volunteer any information. At first I thought it was Manny. It was so like him to make a big romantic gesture like this. But after a few minutes, the suspicion that it might be Itay began to gnaw at me. Manny hadn’t called for almost a week, ever since I’d announced that I was leaving him. Itay, on the other hand, tried on Friday to reverse the situation. Also, very unlike him, he’d come on time to take the kids today. Maybe he wanted to spend a bit of time with them before he went to court their mother. I’d had years of disappointment associated with Valentine’s Day; Itay was always too busy to remember. "For us, every day is Valentine's Day," he’d say every time, trying to appease me.

  If only it was true.

  The limousine rolled through the city. I soon realized we were going toward Tel Aviv. When the limo stopped at last on the boardwalk, I had no doubt about the identity of my unknown suitor, though no one was waiting for me on the boardwalk.

  I went into the café where I’d sat with Manny on our first date, and I went to the same couch where we’d sat, cuddled together, on that fateful night. Manny stood up, reached for me, and enfolded me in his warm embrace. After I finished breathing him in, I gently began to hit him. "Where did you disappear to?" I wailed in a pampered voice.

  We sat down, and Manny explained to me that I had shocked him. He admitted that, at first, he thought that maybe we really didn't fit together and he didn't know if he could live with a woman who’d break up with him as soon as there was some difficulty. He admitted that the next day, he was flooded with a lot of negative emotions. When he’d calmed down, he wanted to call, but on Friday night he got a very disturbing phone call from Hadas, his daughter, Yael’s, girlfriend. It turned out that Yael had been very sick for over a week. They were hiking in a rural area in northern Brazil and the hospital was far from satisfactory. The entire Saturday, Manny had not a moment’s rest, he was so worried. He wanted to get a ticket and travel to Brazil as soon as he could, but he couldn’t get anything online at such short notice and had to wait for Sunday.

  I felt bad. For the entire weekend, I’d been so full of anger and negativity about Manny not calling me, when, in fact, he was just busy and frantic over his daughter. Manny told me he’d really needed my support, but feared I’d be mad at him and think he was trying to take advantage of me. Tears welled up in my eyes when he told me this. How could he even think I'd be mad at him when he needed me?

  On Sunday, before he could get a plane ticket to Brazil, Yael called him herself and told him her condition had improved incredibly and that it was probably just a virus. Manny begged them to return home, but Yael said she really felt better and after her recovery, she wanted to continue their trip and go on to the United States. She reassured him, saying that if she got sick again in the United States, she’d have access to better health services and there was nothing to fear.

  After those few days when all his thoughts were on his daughter, Manny had time to think again about his relationship with me. Yael’s situation had completely thrown him and caused him to think deeply. He realized that, despite my impulsiveness, he hadn’t been as sensitive as he might have to my situation. He realized it was probably a mistake to attend the conference and, in fact, he felt he should have been more available to me the week after my divorce.

  "You broke up your family for me," he whispered, stroking my hair gently, "and I didn't bother to take off time to be with you that week.”

  I apologized myself for my impulsiveness, and I explained to him that everything that happened with him that week just reminded me too much of everything I’d hated about my relationship with Itay, and I didn't want to repeat the same mistake.

  "You're right," he said and kissed me softly.

  We sat cuddled on the couch and enjoyed the caressing and soothing breeze and the whispering sound of the waves.

  After half an hour, he pulled me up. "Come," he said. "I’ve a fantasy to fulfill."

  We left the café and, to my surprise, the limo was still waiting for us.

  We got into the back. The screen separating the driver from the passenger compartment was up.

  Inside, a cool bottle of champagne and a bowl of melon and watermelon balls were waiting for us.

  "We have the limo for another two hours or so, and there’s something else I want to do," he said as a sly smile spread across his face.

  I guessed it immediately. "You’re mad… The driver will hear us."

  "He won’t hear us. There’s a partition between us."

  "But he’ll know what we’re up to!"

  "We’re not the first, and we certainly won’t be the last," Manny said as he kissed me and pulled off my shirt.
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  "You’re just crazy," I said as I unbuttoned his shirt.

  "What can I do?" he purred as I stroked his back. "It’s you that’s driven me completely crazy."

  Sex in a moving limo, with people outside, walking and driving about, and perhaps imagining what might be going on behind the black windows, was an experience I'd never forget.

  It was a bit cramped, I admit, because Manny was no small man, but his excitement did its job. When Manny finished, he roared wildly, and I couldn't believe the partition between the two compartments was man enough to contain his outburst.

  After I got dressed, I opened the sunroof and we peered out from the roof of the limo while it was driving along. We were almost in Haifa. Manny told me that he’d asked the driver to just take a round trip on the coastal road for about two hours.

  The driver turned around when he could and on our way back to Tel Aviv, we devoured the fruit, sipped the champagne and played like two little kids with all the buttons and gadgets in the back of the limo.

  CHAPTER 33

  The next day, I called Itay. We’d already talked about the fact that I had to move in a week and a half and that I wanted him to take the girls for a week. It was August, there were no educational programs for the girls and I expected him to bear some of the burden. I was also pissed by the fact that I had to move in with my parents. I whined a little.

  "Come to live with me." He amazed me.

  "You know that’s impossible."

  "Why not? We lived together until a few months ago."

  "Itay, it's time to accept that we’re divorced now."

  "I'm willing to live with you in sin," he said, and I could hear his self-satisfied smile through the earpiece. I smiled too. Sometimes, he had a pretty good sense of humor.

  "It's not funny," I said, and I was glad he couldn't see the smile on my face. "You have a very small apartment, it’s a long way from kindergarten and from school, and, " I paused, "I doubt if Manny would like it."

  He paused. I realized that his smile was wiped away now.

  "Hello?" I broke the silence at last.

  "So, you two are back together?"

  "Yes."

  "When?"

  "Yesterday."

  "Good for you."

  More silence. I really wanted Itay to know as soon as possible. I knew he had hopes, and I wanted him to understand that there was no hope of a reconciliation.

  "So will you take the girls for a week to ten days?"

  "We'll probably go to Holland." He surprised me. He knew that, for years, I’d wanted to take the girls to a park resort in the Netherlands. A year ago, we’d almost gone with Oded and Orit, but Itay was unwilling to go because he had too much on at work. Itay wasn’t the vengeful type, a point proved by him giving me the divorce and cooperating over the divorce agreement, but this trip reeked of vindictiveness.

  "Really?" I tried to sound nonchalant. "For how long?"

  "Nine days.”

  I was surprised. It sounded planned.

  "You’ve known about this for a while?"

  “Honestly, no," he explained. "My brother and his wife are going there with their children next Friday until the following Saturday.”

  "And you can join them at such short notice?"

  "They were going with a pair of friends, but there are health issues with the friends’ child and they were looking for someone to share the package with them.”

  "Then you go and enjoy yourselves," I said, unable to disguise the jealousy in my voice. I really wanted to take my girls to the Netherlands. But this arrangement allowed me to pack up everything and move calmly to my parents.

  A few hours later, I got a call from a real estate agent that I’d signed up with. There were others, but this one specialized in my area, and any call from him gotme really excited.

  He suggested I drop everything and come. It was exactly what I wanted, and if I didn’t hurry, I might miss out.

  He wasn’t wrong. It was exactly what I was looking for: a five-room apartment not far from the current apartment. I wanted to rent an apartment first, but I was ready to buy as well. The apartment had been for sale for a few months, but the owners had been reluctant to use a realtor and had given in only after they realized that they must. The apartment was already empty, and the price was very close to what I was willing to pay. By Sunday, the deal was done.

  Manny wanted to buy the apartment with me and to have the apartment registered in his name too, but I asked for more time. I could always add his name to the property deeds later on. In the meantime, I had to take out a partial mortgage on the apartment to meet the cost.

  If I’d had a little more time, I might have renovated it a bit and tried to put my personal touch on it, but I was supposed to move in next week. I hired a decorator to freshen up the empty apartment in two days, and a cleaning company to give it some sparkle.

  Itay and the girls had a blast in Holland while I worked like crazy. I wanted Shira and Yarden to come home to an organized apartment. When they returned, loaded with experiences and gifts, the apartment was ready. They wandered into the new apartment like two art critics, full of self-importance.

  The transition to the new apartment demonstrated to everyone, especially my mother, that I regretted nothing. During the week I’d broken up with Manny, she’d had hopes that everything would fall back into place, but after I made up with Manny and I moved, she accepted that my separation from Itay was final.

  For Rosh Hashanah, we received an amazing gift. Yael, Manny’s daughter, returned from her trip. She’d been traveling in South America for five months and the United States for an additional month. Manny was, of course, happy. Yael had left just days after I’d decided that I was leaving Itay for her father, so my daughters hadn’t had the chance to meet her. Now, six months later, I knew Yuval, Manny's son, quite well, and everyone knew Shira and Yarden.

  Even in my wildest dreams, I hadn’t imagined that Shira and Yarden would fall so in love with Yael as they did. It was really love at first sight. It was the eve of the first holiday we celebrated at Manny’s. Yael arrived the night before, and the excitement was tangible. This girl had an amazing emotional intelligence, like her father, and she’d brought Shira and Yarden magical gifts from her visit to Disneyland.

  Shira and Yarden, like most girls, were crazy about Disney princesses and were just in love with her from that moment forward. This mutual infatuation didn't stop at the gifts. Yael just fell in love with them. It was so much fun that we stayed over at Manny’s. This was the first time I’d slept in the same bed as Manny with my girls present in the next room. Everything was so pleasant and natural that no one, including Shira, saw anything unusual about it. Yael and Hadas also stayed over, and the next morning, the games and stories about fairies and magical hidden kingdoms continued until noon. The girls were quite indignant when I explained to them, that afternoon, I had to take them to Grandma Zehava’s, because on the eve of the second night of the holiday, it was Itay’s turn to be with them. They didn't want to part from Yael.

  For the second night of the holiday, we were alone. Yael stayed overnight at herfather’s because she had no other place to live, so Manny came over to my place. Everything was so new and pleasant: the new apartment, Yael’s return, the closeness between my daughters and Manny’s daughter and the fact that my girls were growing more and more used to Manny and his presence in my life. Our life. I felt such a pleasant and free feeling that things were finally starting to work. Even my mother had started to accept Manny and, for the first time, she invited him without prompting to her house for the second holiday dinner, though we politely declined because we wanted to just relax.

  We rarely got out of bed for the entire holiday. I was so tired and exhausted. I hadn’t had a simple summer: I’d divorced Itay, I’d had a short separation from Manny, I’d sold the apartment and I’d bought a new flat and then school had started for the girls. It was so busy, I’d barely had a moment to breathe, and Rosh Ha
shanah, I felt, would cure my exhaustion.

  The holiday newspapers were full, as usual, of end of year round-ups and predictions for the future.

  "What do you wish for yourself for the next year?" Manny asked.

  "A little peace and quiet," I smiled. The past year was undoubtedly the most frenetic year of my life.

  "I know you. You rest for two days and then you get bored," Manny stroked my bare legs between the newspapers scattered across the bed.

  "Oh, how I’d love to be a bit bored!" I said as I stretched out on the pillows behind me.

  Manny leaned over me and kissed me deeply.

  "If there’s anything you don't know how to do, it’s be bored," he declared.

  There was something in what he’d said. I knew what he wished for in the coming year, but I didn't want to bring it up again. I was having so much fun, and I didn't want to destroy it. I knew he wanted, more than I did, for us to get married or at least move in together. I wasn’t quite ready yet. Shira and Yarden had only just moved to a new apartment, and I didn't want to cause them further turmoil in their life.

  "Well?" He interrupted my thoughts. "So what do you wish for yourself for the New Year?"

  "There is something I’ve thought about."

  "What?" He was intrigued.

  "I always wanted to write something. You know, not a contract or an affidavit.”

  "Really?"

  “Yes, really. I think I told you that I once started writing my own blog.”