The Lady The Duke And The Gentleman

by Abby Ayles

  “Do not move,” Duke Haskett added. “You must conserve your strength.”

  Antoinette saw that the redness was slowly fading and dropped the rag, holding Duke Godwin's enormous hand between both of hers. “Breathe slowly,” she said.

  Duke Godwin nodded and closed his eyes again, drawing slow, steady, careful breaths. As he did so, the door opened and the doctor rushed in. Duke Haskett stood up and stepped aside, but as Antoinette attempted to stand, she felt Duke Godwin's great hand seize hers with an iron grip.

  “Please,” he urged her, “please stay a while. Your presence brings me great comfort.”

  Chapter 22

  Waiting for news in the drawing room, Antoinette felt her heart in her throat. Although Duke Godwin had been conscious, the doctor had seemed deeply concerned. Duke Godwin had been carried up between the doctor and Duke Haskett, placed in his bed, and the women had been urged to stay away so that a number of tests could be conducted.

  Now that Duke Godwin was upstairs, Antoinette and Mary could do nothing more but wait. And Antoinette was not naïve enough to assume that consciousness meant he would be well. Her grandmother had collapsed similarly, regained consciousness, and been bedbound for the rest of her life due to a weak heart.

  Glancing at Mary, Antoinette could tell her cousin was thinking the same thing. “I doubt it is what happened to grandma,” Antoinette reassured Mary. “Duke Godwin is far too young.”

  Mary nodded. “I would be so sorry to see Christopher's dear friend in such a state though. And you...oh you poor thing.”

  Antoinette shook her head. “I shall be strong.” But deep down, she was not too sure.

  After all, Duke Godwin was not yet her husband. They were not even betrothed. What if he were bedbound for the rest of his life? What did one do in circumstances such as those? Would she marry him? Surely, in that case, she would be seen as taking advantage of an invalid. But the only other option would be to pass up the opportunity to marry the man who was best suited to her. Neither would be a socially appropriate decision.

  Briefly, a cold thought crossed her mind. Duke Godwin becoming an invalid would be perfect for her. She could be married to a witty, charming, handsome man, he would provide for her family, and he would be physically incapable of restricting her freedoms. He would become the perfect marriage prospect.

  Antoinette did not know where that thought came from, but she felt instantly sickened by herself. Was that who she was becoming? Someone who made decisions about love and marriage the same way one decided what to eat for lunch? She dismissed the thought, though it still left her feeling uneasy.

  Hearing footsteps descending, Antoinette leapt to her feet and marched to the door. She could not help herself. Only an hour ago she had been happily talking to the man she intended to marry, and now he was lying upstairs, possibly fighting for his life. The doctor almost walked right into Antoinette as he entered the room.

  “It is alright,” he reassured her, “please, take a seat.”

  Antoinette nodded and reluctantly made her way back to her chair, where she proceeded to tap her toe against the carpet nervously, awaiting the news.

  “Now,” the doctor began, “the good news is that Duke Godwin is not mortally ill. He appears to have developed an infection of some description, which has made him very unwell, but in most cases a patient makes a full recovery in a matter of days,” he explained.

  Antoinette breathed a sigh of relief. “That is wonderful news. What is the bad news?”

  “He shall recover, no doubt about that...He will, however, require some assistance,” the doctor explained. “He will not be able to leave his bed for these days. He may have great difficulty eating and drinking. He will probably use the bathroom and wash in the mornings with minimal difficulty, but I would not expect him to walk any further than is minimally required, or stand for much longer.”

  “That sounds dreadful,” Antoinette replied. “I suppose his servants will attend to him, though?”

  The doctor hesitated, then nodded. “About that matter–”

  “I shall explain,” Duke Haskett interrupted, walking towards the far end of the room for some privacy. Duke Haskett looked a little uncomfortable and spoke in a quiet voice so that Mary and the doctor could not overhear. “He has specifically requested your company. The doctor believes it is simple delirium caused by the fever, and Mary, well, I am assuming Alex would not wish for her to know. But he was being sincere. I could hear it in his voice. He wishes for you to care for him.”

  Antoinette glanced over at where the doctor and her cousin were waiting and patiently talking to one another. “Are you sure it is not delirium?”

  “I am certain,” Duke Haskett replied.

  “It is a somewhat inappropriate suggestion,” she said. “Could you not stay and care for him? I am sure that when he is well enough he will understand why I could not take on such a duty.”

  “Mary and I were going to leave tonight,” Duke Haskett replied. “We intended to see a few of my friends, especially Mary's parents. I can put the remaining visits on hold, but I cannot neglect my own mother in law, not even for a close friend like Alex. We ought to only be away three days, then we shall return, and Mary and I can shoulder some of the burdens with you.”

  “But you are aware that what you are suggesting is–”

  “Highly inappropriate, yes. But a Duke has the clout to make little matters like these inconsequential, provided they remain behind closed doors. Nobody would ever know. And besides, you would not be alone. There would be staff here, and the doctor would visit. Your presence would simply be for his comfort.” Duke Haskett locked eyes with Antoinette pleadingly. “He is very unwell, and it would mean the world to him for you to stay and care for him, keep him company.”

  Antoinette was not sure. But she would not be staying there, at least. And there would be a housemaid to help her. And the doctor would visit. Besides, Duke Godwin was seriously ill so nothing inappropriate could be assumed. She sighed and nodded. “I suppose if you put it that way. I shall stay for the day and return home at night. Assuming of course that my parents approve of these visits.”

  Duke Haskett smiled in relief. “Thank you. You are a wonderful young woman.”

  “And you shall return within three days?” Antoinette asked.

  Duke Haskett nodded. “I would not wish to burden you any more than is strictly necessary.”

  “Then I suppose that I ought to seize the opportunity whilst you are still here to go home and ask for my parents' permission,” Antoinette replied.

  “I would very much appreciate that,” Duke Haskett said.

  Antoinette had expected her mother to refuse. Or her father to be suspicious. But it seemed that all of fate was colluding to bring her and Duke Godwin together. Both her parents agreed with Duke Haskett that it would be no problem at all, provided there was a third party present at all times, and she never spoke of these visits to anyone else.

  A small part of her was wary. It was all working perhaps a little too well. But, then again, a lot was at stake. If she upset Duke Godwin then perhaps her chances of marrying not only him, but anyone who respected him, would be ruined. She could damage her own relationship with Duke Haskett and her cousin. She would lose the opportunity to marry a man who would care for her family. Everyone was depending on her.

  She decided to move a few of her belongings into a spare bedroom in Duke Godwin's mansion so that she would always have a fresh change of clothes, some toiletries, and whatever else she may need when she was there. And she also made sure that the kitchen was stocked and that the papers would be delivered regularly, so that she would always have something to read. As soon as her bags were there and a maid was unpacking them for her, Duke Haskett and Mary bade their farewells and wished her luck before setting off, leaving her alone in the house with Duke Godwin and the staff.

  Once all her luggage was put away and all her affairs were in order, she drew courage and went to see ho
w Duke Godwin was faring. She had not seen him since he was carried upstairs by Duke Haskett and the doctor. Knocking on the door, she received no reply at first. She knocked again, louder.

  “Who is it?” His voice sounded a little weak, but still himself.

  “It is Antoinette,” she replied. She was surprised to find her voice was shaky. But of course, it was. She was about to walk into the bedroom of a man she intended to marry.

  “Do come in, I have been waiting for you,” he said.

  Opening the door, Antoinette felt her heart pounding in her chest. His bedroom was fairly simple and bare if not for some large portraits hanging around the room, his bed, his chair, and a chest of drawers. Her eyes were forced to focus on the bed, where Duke Godwin sat up, looking tired, but smiling. She smiled meekly also, feeling her face growing hot and her heart thumping harder and harder against her ribs.

  “How are you?” she asked tentatively. She reminded herself that nobody would know she had been there alone, then walked over to the chair, pulling it up beside the bed and sitting down.

  “Absolutely rotten,” Duke Godwin replied. “But I suppose I ought to be grateful it was not something more serious, and that I am alive.”

  Antoinette nodded. “I was very much afraid for you,” she confessed.

  “And I am very much grateful for your presence and calmness during my time of need,” he replied. Their eyes locked and he smiled softly at her.

  Antoinette shook her head and looked at her feet. “No, it was Duke Haskett who was calm. I simply did as I was asked.”

  “Not at all,” Duke Godwin insisted. “Very few women would have been willing or able to do what you did. Or what you are doing now. Tell me, are you nervous? Are you afraid?”

  Antoinette hesitated, then nodded.

  “And why is that?” Duke Godwin asked.

  Antoinette looked up and her eyes met his. He looked at her with so much love, so much happiness that she was there. She smiled. “I suppose I am afraid of what people will think.”

  “A rebel like you, scared of someone else's opinions?” Duke Godwin said, raising an eyebrow.

  Antoinette nodded. “Well, an opinion may not affect me if it is the opinion of my mother, but if it is the opinion of a future suitor or an investor for my brother's business, then it could hurt my whole family.”

  Duke Godwin nodded. “And I understand that. But you must also begin to understand that when you marry a Duke, a lot of these things become less troublesome. Many people fear the opinions of society at large because society at large dictates their wealth, and their friends, and pretty much every aspect of their lives. But people like myself are the very source of the things society at large appreciates. They will overlook certain indiscretions.” He reached out and stroked Antoinette's

  chocolate hair. “And I very much appreciate you being here. I will not harm you. Know that. All I wish for is someone to talk to me, and help me a little.”

  Antoinette smiled. “I am more than prepared to do that,” she said, raising her hand to stroke his.

  “Antoinette, fetch me tea,” he said. “Please.”

  She nodded, the smile not leaving her face. “Of course, though you will need to eat something also.”

  Duke Godwin nodded but looked a little less comfortable. “I am not too hungry, and they do say fasting is good for illness.”

  Antoinette nodded. “Of course.” She curtsied and set off to find a maid, or the cook, so someone could make Duke Godwin tea. She had been reassured by Duke Haskett that the next morning a whole horde of servants would arrive to help her take care of Duke Godwin. But right now the four that had been there were proving highly elusive. Eventually, she tracked one down and asked them to bring tea immediately to Duke Godwin's room.

  Returning, she found him looking slightly melancholy. As she walked through the door, he forced out a smile, but she could tell his heart was not in it.

  “I am sorry to be such a bore,” he said softly.

  She shook her head. “Not at all, you are unwell and require care. I can care for you easily, and it brings me great joy to do so,” she insisted, sitting down beside him and holding his hand.

  He squeezed her hand. “Were you any other woman I would say you were doing it to secure your marriage to me and get your hands on my wealth, but you are not, are you? You would do this whoever I was.”

  She shook her head again. “Not whoever, and not this far. I am doing this because I genuinely care for you. Any other person I would help them, but I would not risk my dignity. And I am not prepared to lie to convince you I am a good person who would do anything for anyone. If you believe now that it is due to your wealth, so be it. But I will not lie.”

  Duke Godwin smiled tenderly. “You really do know all the right things to say, don't you? Or do you just see right through my little traps?”

  Antoinette shrugged a bit. “I am not here to play games, Your Grace, I am here to keep you company. As you requested.”

  He let out a soft sigh and nodded. “I do believe you are the right woman for me.”

  “Am I?” Antoinette asked, trying to keep a stony face but feeling her heart beat hard and fast.

  “I promise, I shall love you forever and unconditionally for all the good you are doing me. In fact, I shall ask your father for your hand in marriage as soon as I am well enough to do so in person,” he said, kissing the back of her hand.

  Antoinette felt as though she could faint any minute. “Then I suppose I ought to promise you, my unconditional love, also,” she finally said breathlessly.

  Chapter 23

  Antoinette felt her heart beating harder and faster as each silent second passed. He did not release her hand. She did not attempt to slip it away. She just enjoyed his touch and his company. There was something magical about just sitting there together, the two of them, thinking about what they had just said.

  Finally, Duke Godwin lifted her hand to his lips once more and kissed her dainty fingers. “I enjoy your presence very much, but I am tired. I would like some time alone to repose, sleep, and recover a little.”

  Antoinette nodded. In part, she was saddened. Those silent minutes holding his hand made her feel closer to him, more intimate, like she was getting to know him on a deeper level than mere words would allow. But in part she was relieved. After Duke Godwin's confession she found herself overflowing with all sorts of emotions, most of which were not appropriate to express in public.

  Releasing his hand and standing, she smiled. “I shall see you shortly. Send for me if you need anything,” she said as politely as she could. Then, with a curtsy, she left the room.

  In her own room, she collapsed on the bed and let out a squeal of delight into the pillow. Duke Godwin had promised her his eternal and unconditional love. And she had returned it. Of course, it was not a formal arrangement, as would be handled once he was well enough. But it was a step towards the marriage of her dreams, the marriage which would make her family happy.

  Rolling over on her bed, she felt the usual doubts pouring in but dismissed them. It was too late for doubts and questions now. She would face those hurdles when she came to them. In the meantime, she was going to marry Duke Godwin. But who to tell first? Naturally, there was only one person who it would be right to tell yet.

  She immediately wrote a letter to her mother. It was too soon to tell her friends, and her father could not know until Duke Godwin made his announcement. But her mother would be eager to find out and to discuss the matter with her. And besides, there was no realistic possibility that Antoinette would keep that secret all on her own for so long. She already felt as though she was about to burst.

  “Dearest mother,

  I have a secret I wish to share with you, and you must promise to yourself and to me that you will not tell a soul until the time is right. Duke Godwin has confessed to me his eternal and unconditional love, and sworn that he will ask father for my hand in marriage as soon as he is well enough. I have promised him m
y love in return.

  I know that these promises are nothing formal, but I feel as though they have a certain purpose and direction. I needed to share my joy with you, so that it could double and we could rejoice together. But do not tell father yet, or you shall ruin the surprise.

  Your daughter,

  Antoinette.”

  She knew that the letter may be intercepted and opened by someone else were she to send it by post or by messenger. And she knew that someone may read it if they found it. But she was more concerned about her father overhearing any conversations with her mother, and she trusted her mother to hide or dispose of the letter if necessary.

  Once it was written, she put it aside to take home with her. Duke Godwin sent for her slightly before dinner time.

  Now that she knew she was essentially betrothed to Duke Godwin, she felt much more relaxed around him. It brought her peace of mind to know that intimacy was no longer completely inappropriate. She could laugh more freely and allowed him to hold her hand for reassurance when he was feeling unwell.

  As night fell, he asked her to stay a little longer. “Just for a few more hours,” he said.

  Antoinette shook her head. “No, I must get to sleep.”

  “Then stay and sleep here,” he insisted. “There are plenty of spare rooms.”

  Antoinette shook her head again. “It is completely inappropriate, I cannot stay at your home unescorted.”

  “You have all day,” Duke Godwin insisted again.

  “But this is night. And if you will be like this then I may not be able to care for you tomorrow,” Antoinette said. She knew she was being a little cold, but she had to put her foot down. Otherwise, he would continue to push her limits until she could not reject anything.

  Duke Godwin frowned a little but then nodded. “Very well. You are a dignified young lady,” he smiled.