La Strada Da Seguire: The Road to Follow

by Susan Toscan

  Italy: A restless spirit

  Alessandro left his village with the German/Italian army for what would very likely be the last time.

  Savina and her family all hoped that an end to the madness of the conflict would come soon; they had no idea that they would have to live through another three years of war.

  Savina and the other young people of the village still attended school a few hours each day, but the children mostly had to work at home and on the farms to help feed their families as well as look after the German soldiers living in their houses.

  At home, Savina was a very unhappy young woman. She did not get on with her stepmother. Her own mother had died when she was only four years old and her sister Olga was two. Savina’s father had then married her mother’s sister. Her stepmother had treated the two little girls well in the beginning, but when Gigetta and then Giovanni were born, she expected much more from her stepdaughters.

  As the oldest child, Savina was made to do most of the household chores as well as look after the younger children; while she loved her sisters and her brother, she had no time to be a child herself.

  Although Savina knew that her father loved her, he would not go against the wishes of his wife. When his daughter complained to him, he would always ask her to do as she was told and not to cause trouble. “Savina, bella, please don’t upset your stepmother. I have enough to worry about. You must stop complaining and look after your sisters and brother like a good girl.”

  It always made Savina angry whenever her father spoke to her in what she felt was a patronising way. “Why will you not listen to me, Papa? I want some freedom. I feel like a slave.” She was sick of her life. She often tried to draw her father into a fight, but his response was always measured. Even though she did not think so, he understood her frustration. His heart ached for his spirited daughter.

  These were hard times for a girl maturing into young adulthood, especially one with Savina’s determined nature. There was a restless spirit developing in this young woman, and she knew that she would grow up strong; when she was an adult, no-one would ever tell her what to do again. But for now, she just wanted to shut out the world. She wanted Alessandro to come home and this awful war to stop. Why was it all so hard and lonely? She felt that she did not have a single friend with whom to talk.

  She missed talking to Alessandro about her life. Her friend had understood her. He knew what it was like to feel like a servant in your own home. He shared her restless energy, and he recognised her fears. He could make her laugh by changing the subject and telling her funny stories. They had rarely spent time alone, but she had always delighted in his company.

  Sometimes when the Messera and Cattuzzo families got together for a celebration, Alessandro would sing. He had the most beautiful voice, and Savina loved to listen to him. She knew that Alessandro had a secret dream to sing as a tenor in the Italian Opera one day. That dream seemed a long way from where their lives were at the moment. There had been no sing-alongs since the war had started.

  Life continued to get more difficult for the people of Cavaso. Food was scarce, and families had to rely on what they could grow and produce themselves for sustenance. The summer months were generally easier as the villagers could grow more crops, but as the war escalated, so did the need to provide food for the military. The army had taken most of the local livestock to feed its soldiers, leaving only a couple of cows to supply milk for the whole village. The army would also raid the village’s vegetable crops and strip the fruit from the trees. To ensure that they would have some food crops left, particularly for the winter months, the villagers pulled up the floorboards of their houses and planted potatoes under the floors. Fortunately, they did get rations from the local authorities. They became very adept at making good, filling food with the basic ingredients of rice, flour and potatoes.

  Italy: When the time is right

  Soon after he had been forced to join the German/Italian army, Alessandro had made the decision that he would escape and join the CLN partisans. He was anxious to get away as soon as he could. He knew that once he joined the resistance, he would not be able to return to his village until the war was over. It was a sacrifice he was prepared to make; he could not continue to fight for a cause he did not believe in.

  After his last visit to Cavaso, when he had spoken to Savina about her harassment in the church hall, Alessandro returned to the army camp to rejoin the German soldiers who were waiting for him. Had he not returned, the consequences for his family would have been unthinkable. He hated the hold the Germans had on him, and he knew that when he did escape, he had to be so far away from his family’s village that the soldiers could not return to harm it.

  Because of his strength and quick wits, Alessandro had proved to be an asset to the German army, and—in accordance with his plan—they were starting to trust him and give him more responsibility. He was determined to learn all he could from them.

  As well as being fearless, Alessandro was a fast learner. He was liked and respected by the other men in his unit, and even the German officers held him in high regard. Little did they know that he planned to fight against them as soon as he could get away.

  Alessandro was one of the few new recruits who knew how to handle a rifle. Growing up on the farm, he had been taught by his father to use a gun so that he could hunt in the mountains for small animals to supplement food for the family. He practised often and was a very good shot. In fact, he often managed to kill enough animals to feed a number of families. His father had taught him to be responsible with the gun, and Alessandro had certainly never thought that he would be forced to use a rifle against another person.

  When the German officers recognised his talent with a rifle, they made sure that he had the most up-to-date weapon and plenty of ammunition. Alessandro would hide some of the ammunition instead of using it all for practise as he was instructed to do. He knew there would be a use for it one day—but not for the purpose that the officers intended.

  Under the noses of the Germans, he had been making contact with and assisting the partisans by passing on information and disclosing the whereabouts of the army. He was taking a huge risk, but he needed to feel that he was contributing to the efforts of the resistance movement. His partisan contact, a man called Giuseppe, had told him, “Stay with the German army for now. The information that you’re able to pass on to us is invaluable. We’re keeping a close eye on you, and we certainly want you with us—but when the time is right. We’ll be in touch with you.”

  Alessandro experienced conflicting emotions as he waited for his orders from the partisans and his opportunity to escape. He did actually like some of the soldiers he had been forced to fight with, and it made him very sad to know that he would soon be plotting against these young men. These German soldiers were about the same age as he was, and they often shared stories of their life back home. Like Alessandro, they wanted this war to be over so that they could return to their families. He was very aware that most of these soldiers were not as fanatical as their leader; they were just ordinary men following orders. They all shared the fears that this war had made a reality for them, and none of them knew what the future would hold. They were patriotic and brave, and as Alessandro got to know them, his compassion for their circumstances grew. But he knew that he could not let these feelings overshadow the decision that he had made to escape and fight with the partisans.

  Communication between the German and Italian soldiers was improving. The Italians were quickly learn­ing the invaders’ language, especially the vocabulary used when orders were given. Likewise, many German soldiers had good language skills and could speak Italian very well—even though they did have difficulties with the dialects of the different areas of Italy. In general, however, they all managed to make themselves understood.

  Many of the Italian men who had been taken by the Germans at the same time as Alessandro shared his respect for some of their captors, but a general sense of discontent was evident
, and many arguments would break out between the two nationalities.

  News that Mussolini’s government had been overthrown in 1943 gave Alessandro the determination to fight for the resistance movement as soon as he could.

  Later that year, the partisans got word to Alessandro that he should escape from the army as soon as he had the chance. They suspected that one of the German officers was starting to watch him a bit too closely, and they did not want to risk him being singled out.

  When the opportunity to make a break finally arose, Alessandro was surprised at how easy it was. He and some of his fellow soldiers, both German and Italian, had been sent out on a patrol. They were quite close to a small town, and Alessandro had announced that he would go ahead alone to check the outskirts before giving them the signal to continue.

  He felt extremely torn about leaving the Italian soldiers, but he could not tell them his plans—for his own sake as well as theirs. While the soldiers lay hiding, waiting for some word from him, Alessandro walked through the small town and out the other side. He was very careful to keep to the side streets. When he was clear of the town, he quickly changed into some farmer’s clothes that he had in his pack, buried his uniform and began to make his way to the nearest partisan outpost. He had been given directions to its approximate location and told that he would probably need to keep walking for at least day and the partisans would find him.

  As he made his way along the road, watching for soldiers, he had an overwhelming sense that he had done something important. He was afraid, but he no longer felt that he was powerless in this war. He knew that whatever lay ahead for him, he at least had some sense of control—finally.

  After Alessandro had spent two days on his own and experienced a few near misses with German troops passing him in their trucks, the partisan scouts approached him.

  They questioned him extensively until they were satisfied that he was the person they had been sent to meet. The partisans had been watching him for the past day to be sure that he did not have anyone following him. The fighters were happy to see him; they knew his reputation, especially the fact that he was very good with a rifle, and they needed every man they could get.

  “You did well to jump into the bushes on the side of the road to avoid being seen by the German trucks,” the leader commented to Alessandro. “You had us holding our breath for you for a while.”

  “It gave me a fright, all right. I didn’t see the approaching headlights at first, but when I heard the rumbling noise of the motors, I knew I had to move quickly.” Alessandro was a little embarrassed that they had witnessed the incident.

  “You’ve shown us that you’re alert and can think quickly. You’re the type of soldier we need. It’s a matter of survival out here. Now, let’s get back to the camp,” the man in charge instructed.

  Being in the army had been tough, but Alessandro soon discovered that living in the mountains with the partisan soldiers was even more difficult. They lived mostly outdoors in all weather conditions, surviving mainly on what animals they could catch or shoot. The support of the local people was imperative to their survival. Life was only bearable because the villagers provided the fighters with food and clothing whenever they could.

  Absent without leave

  Agnes knew that Brad was right and that she should wait for information from the army before jumping to any conclusions about Michael’s disappearance. She tried to be rational about the situ­ation but still could not think of any other reason why she had not heard from her husband.

  Steven had not been able to tell her any more than the Army Office had. “Agnes, I don’t know what to say. I don’t understand why you haven’t heard from him by now. All I know is that Michael was badly injured, but I certainly had every reason to believe that he would be home as soon as he was well enough.”

  Steven knew he would have to tell Agnes about his friend’s troubled state of mind at some point. He looked intently at the tormented women standing before him. “Although I do have to tell you he was in a bad way, mentally—not just physically.” He saw the look of anguish flicker across her face and did his best to be reassuring. “Please try not to think the worst, love. We have to stay positive and believe that Michael will contact you soon.”

  Steven could not help remembering Michael’s words to him before being taken to the hospital in Cairo. “No home for me, mate—no more home…” Steven prayed that it had been the drugs that had made Michael say those words and not his traumatised mind.

  But as Steven spoke the words, Agnes could see that he too was trying to work out what might have happened. From the fear in his eyes, she knew that he was as afraid as she was.

  Steven was only home for a few weeks before he was sent to New Guinea to fight in the war in the Pacific. He did not want to be a hero. He just wanted to do his job and, once it was over, come home to Renata for good so that they could get on with their lives.

  Agnes tried to reassure the children; she had to tell them something. They were aware of the adults talking quietly, and the worried expressions on the older people’s faces gave them cause to ask questions. Agnes did not want to lie to them, but she felt that they were too young to comprehend the situation, especially when she could not comprehend it.

  Frances was insistent. “Come on, Mum! I know something is wrong. What is it? You are crying a lot, and everyone seems really upset.”

  “I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t want you to worry, but we’ve had news that Daddy’s been hurt. We can’t get any more information at the moment because he’s been moved to a hospital. We just have to wait, but it’s hard not knowing. I promise I’ll tell you when I know more. Okay?”

  Agnes was still not able to accept the possibility that Michael was dead, but there just did not seem to be any other explanation. She slept very badly. At night, she would go over and over all of the scenarios that she could possibly think of. She was desperate for answers, and at times, she was sure that she must be losing her mind.

  Agnes’s parents were beside themselves with worry and tried to spend as much time with the children as they could. They could see that Agnes was not coping; to her shame, her frustration was often taken out on the children. Of course, she did not mean to do this, and afterwards she was always furious with herself.

  “Mum, I love my children so much, and yet I get so angry with them over nothing,” Agnes said to Elsie on one particularly hard day. “I don’t understand what’s happening to me. I can see the confusion on their little faces, and I don’t have any answers for them. It’s so unfair. Why isn’t Michael home with us?”

  When the situation became unbearable, Agnes would fall into her mother’s arms and cry out of anger and frustration.

  Elsie’s patience was boundless. At such times, she would hold her daughter without reproach and will her to be strong. Elsie had had so much hope that Michael would return to his family, but as the months went on without any word of his whereabouts, she found it increasingly difficult to stay positive for her daughter and grandchildren. The truth was that Elsie was as bewildered as Agnes. Even so, she tried to reassure her daughter. “It’s only been six months. Let’s pray that any day now we’ll have news of his return.” She said this while thinking that anything could have happened during those six months.

  Maria and Frank often came to visit Agnes and share their concern for Michael; they too were struggling with fears about missing family. There had been little information coming out of Italy for over a year until finally a letter arrived with worrying news.

  “We had another letter from my brother. He says he’s heard a whisper that Alessandro might have joined the partisans’ army. They have no confirmation, and they haven’t heard from Alessandro. He wouldn’t risk contacting his family. We pray for him as well as for Michael. So much worry,” Frank said as he hugged Agnes.

  Tom had also recently visited Agnes. He had not heard from Michael since the young man had first arrived in Tobruk. He too was worried about the family,
and he assured the anxious young woman that he was there to help her. “The old shearers, who are still trying to manage without the young blokes, all send their regards. They said to tell you that man of yours was pretty good at taking care of himself around the sheds—and they think he would still be taking care of himself.”

  Agnes thanked Tom. “And thank the others for me, too. It’s good to know that they’re thinking of Michael. I pray that they’re right.”

  What none of them knew—what the person in the Army Office had been unable to tell the young woman who sat before him in so much pain—was that Michael had gone absent without leave. He had left the hospital in Cairo and had not been seen since. It seemed that Michael had been assisted by a young nurse who had gone missing at the same time.

  The army did not want to admit that they had ‘lost’ their soldier. This, combined with Michael’s deteriorated mental state and physical injuries, would not reflect well on Australian military command. In reality, during the war, many soldiers had disappeared from or failed to return to their bases, even though it was almost certain that they had survived the fighting on various battlegrounds. It was not something of which the army was proud.

  A hopeless case

  Michael was in that hospital in Cairo for four months. During that time, he had an artificial leg fitted and was given long physiotherapy sessions to help him get used to the prosthesis. He hated it. It was a daily reminder of the fact that he was not a whole man. When anyone would look at him, he would shout at them, “What, haven’t you seen a cripple before?”