Shades of Moonlight

by Stephanie Julian

  All because Ettore had wanted her to be a breeding machine.

  She lifted her hands. “Where were you?”

  His eyes narrowed as he watched her hands before he nodded and lifted his gaze back to hers. “Out for a run. I wanted to check the forest, make sure everything’s okay.”

  Then he pulled his shirt over his head and she nearly asked him to take it off again.

  “Something happen?”

  He strode across the room to her, stopping only inches away and again she was struck by his size. He made her feel tiny. And as if nothing could get at her if he stood by her side. Or in front of her.

  Looking up into those dark, dark eyes, she wondered if he knew how she felt about him. If he knew she wanted him to kiss her again. To take her out of herself for just a little while.

  Was that so awful? Arin was safe and sound asleep in the little bedroom next to hers. Arin had outgrown the bassinet, and the queen-size bed in her room didn’t leave room for the crib.

  She wasn’t sure Race would fit in her bed. And if he did, he’d take up most of it.

  And that would be okay.

  A muscle began to jump in his jaw and she reached out to run a finger along the rough stubble on his cheeks. He had perpetual five o’clock shadow. It added to the air of danger surrounding him.

  With any other man, it would’ve turned her off, made her run the other way.

  With Race…it drew her closer.

  She took a step forward until only inches separated them. She wanted him to kiss her again but he seemed dead set against it. He held stock-still, his only movements that still-twitching muscle in his jaw and the increasingly labored rise and fall of his chest.

  Was he as affected by her as she was by him? He’d kissed her last night then pushed her away. What would happen if she kissed him right now?

  She wanted to ask him but she knew he wouldn’t be able to understand all of it and she didn’t want him to misunderstand her in any way.

  So how did she show him what she wanted?

  Should she rise onto her tiptoes and press her lips against his? Last night he’d kissed her. Maybe she needed to show him just how much she wanted him.

  “Are you sure?”

  His voice startled her and her gaze flew from his lips to his eyes.

  “Just nod or shake your head. I don’t want any misunderstandings. If you don’t want to kiss me, shake your head. If you do, nod—”

  Putting both hands on his cheeks, she pulled him down and kissed him. She wanted him to have no doubt that this was what she wanted. That he was who she wanted.

  As her lips moved over his, she took her time, learning how best they fit together. How much better they meshed when she turned her head a certain way or how much deeper when she lifted onto her toes.

  Race let her explore, let her kiss him instead of taking over.

  She felt the tension in his body, as if he were holding himself back from grabbing her and pulling her against him.

  She appreciated his control but it wasn’t what she wanted. She wanted him out of control. Wanted him to want her so much he couldn’t keep his hands off her.

  Taking the final step forward, she pressed against him from breasts to thighs.

  Gods, the man threw off enough heat to warm an entire room.

  She wanted to get closer. Wanted to feel his naked body against hers. Over her. Wrapped around her and moving in her.

  Did he want the same?

  She pulled back and opened her eyes, looking up. His were open, barely, and glittering.

  “Are you absolutely sure?”

  His voice sounded sexy, dark and enticing. She wanted to hear him telling her how much he wanted her. Not constantly asking if she was okay or if she was certain she knew what she wanted.

  She wanted him to know she was okay. Wanted him to trust that she knew what she wanted.

  Prove to him she was as adult as she claimed to be.

  Making sure she maintained eye contact, she nodded then smiled at him.

  And watched desire flush his face.

  “You want to stop at any time, all you have to do is push me away. I’ll understand. Okay?”

  She nodded because he needed the confirmation. Then she took his hand and led him to her room.

  She didn’t turn on any lights. Didn’t need them because she always left the curtains open. She couldn’t stand being shut in a room and having the windows covered. Another thing to lay at Ettore’s feet.

  But she wasn’t about to let that madman invade this time with Race.

  Not here. Not now.

  Moonlight bounced off the snow and lit the room with a silver glow. It made her smile, added a hint of romance she hadn’t anticipated.

  Not that she expected Race to care about romance. Men didn’t really think about those things, did they? It seemed women were the only ones who cared about moonlight and candles and—

  “Turn around. I want to look at you.”

  The tone of his voice made it hard for her to swallow as she did as he asked. But before she could do more than glance at him, he wrapped his arms around her and settled his mouth over hers again.

  This time, his kiss was more demanding, more like last night. She stretched against him, aching for more contact.

  Why wouldn’t he rush? She wanted him to tear her clothes off. To show he truly wanted her.

  Instead he slowed, drawing out the kiss. One hand cupped her jaw, the other splayed across her back, a warm, heavy weight that did weird and wonderful things to her.

  She couldn’t imagine how she’d react when they were naked.

  And they would be. Hopefully soon. She wanted that connection with Race. Needed it.

  He’d become important to her and she believed she’d become the same to him.

  She hoped she wasn’t wrong, that she could trust her judgment.

  But after everything that’d happened to her…

  No. No more.

  She refused to live her life by others’ expectations.

  While Race kissed her with total control, she worked her hands under the t-shirt he’d pulled on only minutes ago.

  Warm flesh against her skin. Hard muscles flexing beneath her hands as she spread them across his broad shoulders. Her lips parted and his tongue slid into her mouth to tangle with hers.

  Gently. No heated, frantic rush.

  She sensed he was holding back. Probably because he didn’t want to scare her.

  Race didn’t scare her. How could she make him understand that?

  Taking a step back, she maintained eye contact as she pointed to his shirt.

  His gaze narrowed but he didn’t move. So she pointed again, this time touching her finger to his shirt and flicking at it.

  His expression lightened the tiniest bit. “But I just put it on.”

  She cocked one eyebrow at him, realizing he was playing with her. Knowing Race wasn’t known for his playful nature. She liked that he wanted to play with her.

  He sighed. “All right. But only because you insist.”

  Biting back a smile, she knew she did insist. And when he reached behind him and pulled the shirt over his head, she wanted to insist he strip completely.

  She’d seen what was under those clothes before. But this time, instead of simply admiring, she could touch. And she so wanted to touch.

  She reached for him, letting her fingertips graze along the defined ridges of his abdomen. Her previous lover had been in shape but Race put him to shame. Hell, Race put most other men to shame. He was as beautiful as a piece of sculpture. But so alive.

  He gave off heat like a furnace and she wanted to soak it in, skin-to-skin, until she was as warm as he was.

  Lately she couldn’t get warm enough.

  Right now, she was overheating.

  She wanted him to strip off her clothes but she knew he wouldn’t unless she asked. And she didn’t want to have to use her hands for that. Her hands were busy exploring him.

  He
held still, let her fingertips glide over his pointed nipples, down to the muscles of his abs then lower, to trace the waistband of his jeans. She heard him suck in a quick breath as she slipped one finger into the front of his pants and almost brushed against the head of his erection.

  His jeans strained against the thick length and she wanted to release his zipper so she could see him in all his glory.

  Wanted to stroke him and tease him and torment him. All the things she’d never gotten to do at each previous fumbling, furtive time.

  “Mara, look at me.”

  She responded to his voice immediately, tilting her head back so she could look into his eyes.

  He’d sounded worried and she had a moment to stare up at him before he cupped her cheeks in his hands and kissed her again.

  This time, it was more like being devoured. And so much more erotic than anything she’d ever experienced.

  He held nothing back now and her body responded with a surge of desire, making her wet between her thighs, making her heart race and her blood pound.

  Squirming against him, she wanted to be closer. As if he’d read her mind, he released her face and reached for her shirt. He reared back to pull it over her head, allowing her to suck in a quick breath before he kissed her again seconds later, not even long enough for her skin to register the change in temperature.

  And then her senses went wild at the touch of so much of his skin against hers.

  Firm yet soft. Hot.

  Her hands spread across his back, fingers clenching so her nails dug into his skin. He groaned, low and deep, then kissed her harder.

  She couldn’t get enough of him, of the feel of his skin, of his taste. Of the way he totally dominated the kiss but didn’t make her feel as if he were using her only for his pleasure.

  He kissed her as if he were starving for her, as if he couldn’t get enough of her. And that set her free.

  No more doubts. At least not now.

  She pressed into his hands when he cupped her breasts. She didn’t have much there so she didn’t usually wear a bra. She hadn’t tonight so he had unimpeded access.

  Which he took full advantage of. He put his hands over her breasts, cupping them, molding them. Slowly at first then with more force.

  He didn’t hurt her. Not at all. He made her ache. For more. Faster.

  Shifting her head to get a better angle, she reached for his jeans but he grabbed both of her hands in one of his and instead flattened them against his stomach.

  “Not yet. I want you to touch me.”

  Was it possible his voice had slipped even lower?

  It sent shivers up her spine.

  “Are you cold?” His hands moved from her breasts to her shoulders then rubbed down her arms.

  Shaking her head vehemently, she looked up, her fingers sliding under his waistband to brush closer and closer to what he had hidden behind the zipper.

  His eyelids snapped shut and his expression looked almost pained. “Touch me, Mara. I want your hands on me.”

  The tone of his voice sent a bolt of sensation straight to her clit. That little organ was already incredibly sensitive. Wrapping her arms around his waist, she aligned their bodies until she could press her clit against his thigh. The pressure gave her some much-needed relief. But only for a few seconds. Then the yearning increased.

  His mouth descended again, but this time his lips landed on her neck. He nipped at her skin before he licked at her earlobe then kissed his way down to her collarbone.

  Goose bumps erupted along her skin, and her fingers dug into his back.

  “Yeah, that’s right. I like that.”

  Liked what? She dragged her nails up his back and he groaned into her neck.

  Oh. Okay.

  While she discovered every trick to make him groan, he drove her closer to the edge of total surrender.

  If she thought what she’d experienced before had been good, Race proved her totally wrong.

  He set her on fire with only his hands and his mouth. She couldn’t imagine what would happen when he finally took the rest of her clothes off.

  Which would hopefully happen really soon.

  She felt like a rocket with a lit fuse, all ready to go off but still burning.

  Race, however, wasn’t getting with the program. He maintained his slow and steady pace, his mouth lingering in all sorts of interesting places but not exactly where she wanted him to go. He nipped along her collarbone, following the curve of her shoulder before backtracking to her neck.

  He bit her at the point where her neck met her shoulder, causing her to gasp and her fingernails to rake at his back.

  The sound he made assured her he liked what she’d done but she was fast losing her senses under his steady onslaught of desire.

  Her head tilted back so he could get a better angle and his lips trailed down her neck to the top curve of her breast.

  Just a little farther…

  His arms wrapped around her and her feet left the floor. A second later, he lowered his lips to one of her nipples and sucked.

  If the spell on her voice had been broken, her groan would have rattled the windows. Electricity shot through her, to all the points of her body that demanded he pleasure them. Her breasts, her clit. Deep inside her body.

  She wrapped her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck, her eyes closed as she absorbed the pleasure rushing through her.

  With his mouth, he worshipped her breasts, teasing the nipples into tight points that begged for more. And he gave it to her. He bit her, not hard enough to hurt. And still she shuddered from the shock of it.

  One hand clutched at his shoulder, the other clamped to the back of his head, making sure he didn’t get away.

  When she began to rock against him, trying to get the pressure where she needed it, he lifted his head and tapped her ass with his hand. Not hard, just enough to focus her attention.

  “No jumping ahead of schedule.” He began to walk, heading for her bedroom. “I plan to feast on you for at least another hour.”

  Her mouth dropped open and he started to laugh, a low chuckle that made her lips part as the sound battered her already crumbled defenses. “All right, maybe half an hour. But, Mara, I don’t want to rush this.”

  She wanted to respond, opened her mouth to speak and silently cursed the fact that she couldn’t. And she couldn’t use her hands either. The light was dimmer back here and he had a hard enough time understanding her when he could see her hands clearly.

  A frown started to form but he swooped in and kissed it off her lips.

  The next thing she knew she was falling.

  No, not falling. Race was lowering her to the bed, following her down and completely covering her with his body.

  Yes. This was what she’d wanted. The feeling of being totally surrounded by him, his mouth taking hers, his hands molding her body.

  Her fingers splayed across his chest. The muscles jumped and flexed beneath her palms as she caressed his warm skin, even as his mouth demanded more.

  She felt him working the buttons on her jeans. With his free hand, he cupped her nape, holding her at the perfect angle for his kiss.

  He struggled a little with her jeans but shoved them, along with her panties, off her hips and down around her thighs. She figured he’d want to get inside her as soon as possible but he left the jeans just above her knees.

  Then she felt him brush against the hair on her mound. Every muscle in her body tensed with anticipation, her clit pulsing for his touch.

  Which he deliberately denied her.

  She squirmed against him, trying to make him touch her where she wanted. Instead he trailed his fingers up. Over her abdomen, still rounded with the baby weight she hadn’t yet lost to just below her breasts.

  Then he moved his mouth to her breasts again and used both his hands and lips to make her gasp and her body burn.

  His lips tugged at one nipple while his fingers pinched the other. The dual stimulation had h
er fingers clenching into his shoulders. Trying to tug him closer.

  But Race was an immoveable object, seemingly intent only on making her crazy. The heat from his body seared her, the hard ridge pressed against her thigh taunted her. She wanted to yell at him but of course he wouldn’t hear her.

  All she could do was lie there and let him whip her into a frenzy. So she let herself enjoy it.

  “That’s it.” His rough voice sent a shiver through her body. “Let go, babe. Just give yourself over to me.”

  Oh yes, she would. For now.

  He played with her breasts for a long time, until her bones felt like liquid and her skin oversensitive. When he finally slipped one hand back down her body, she nearly jumped out of her skin.

  This time, he pushed her jeans down and completely off. As soon as her feet were free, she moved.

  She rose onto her knees and pushed him onto his back. She knew the only reason she did was because he allowed her to. And that was okay.

  When she had him flat on his back, she knelt beside him…then paused, unsure what to do next.

  Her former lover had always taken control in the bedroom. She’d felt she hadn’t known enough to make it good for him, and he’d seemed to be content with a little foreplay and a really quick fuck. Which was all it had been with him.

  This… This felt different. And she wanted it to be different.

  “Mara.” Race had gone still on the bed. When he spoke, her gaze flew up to catch his. “We can stop right—”

  She put her hand over his mouth and shook her head, felt his lips curve beneath her hand before he pulled it away from his mouth and laced their fingers together.

  “Then I’m all yours.”

  She smiled, his words giving her the confidence to do what she wanted. Give in to the urge to explore.

  Since she’d loved when he’d sucked on her nipples, she bent and put her mouth over his. Nipping at the hard tip, she felt him groan. The vibration made her smile as she inhaled his scent and lapped up the salty flavor of his skin.