Stomach
This area is problematic. It feels nice (although, sometimes ticklish) to be stroked and caressed here. But sometimes, with water gain during her period, or because she does have a little extra weight, she may be sensitive about having her stomach touched too much. Just pay attention to how she reacts when you touch her here, and play it by ear.
Along the Spine
Follow the contour lines of her back, spreading out from her spine, long, feathery caresses with your fingertips, leaving pale lines on her skin with your (well-trimmed and smooth) finger nails, occasionally brushing away from the spine like the feathers on your angel’s wings (sorry, I couldn’t resist being girly!) Do the same with your lips, leaving a trail of soft, gentle kisses against her skin, maybe four or five inches apart...a vibrator just barely touching her, following the same routes. It’s the slow, gentle application of you on her that she appreciates, adores, and is aroused by. Feathers, half melted ice cube or even an ice cream cone, the butt of a whip...use your imagination, but present it to her as your desire to make her feel good. And she’ll make you feel good later.
Bottom
You can kiss it, touch it or squeeze it. If both of you are into it, spank her, but never do it if you are not sure that she will enjoy it. I’m especially attracted to this area, both having it fondled, and fondling it on a partner.
Vulva
You will get a ton of ideas in this book on what to do with this part of her body. Keep reading. :)
Legs
Being touched almost anywhere on her legs is stimulating and pleasant for a woman, but the most erotically charged areas are inside her thighs, and behind her knees. Plenty of fingertip caressing (NO fingernails) and lip and tongue action here is usually well received, as long as you vary the touch, and try not to repeat the areas to be caressed more than a few times. As part of a strategy to work your mouth closer and closer to her by now wet pussy, soft kisses up her legs to her knees, then inside her thighs, growing ever closer to her sweet, musky love nest can drive her insane – don’t be surprised if she forcibly pulls your head to her crotch to get your mouth on her pussy.
Feet
Everyone, man or woman, likes having their feet massaged, and you can actually lightly knead the muscles there more roughly than anywhere else on her body (other than the back) without objection. Most women would be happy just to get a foot rub, much less a screaming orgasm from your mouth on her vulva!
You can suck her toes, and lick her feet, too, assuming that she’s prepared herself for you as well as you have for her (hint – clean is really good.) She’ll be tickled, turned on, and very, very intrigued.
Inside the body - G-Spot
Yes, this absolutely exists, though women vary in their sensitivity and reaction to stimulation of it. It’s located behind her clitoris, inside her vagina. I think of it as being positioned like a rear view mirror in a car when I describe it to new male lovers (and even a few ‘noobs’ to girl-girl sex who did not know where it was...at first.)
An easy way to locate it is by placing one or two fingers (gently, gently) into her vagina with your palm facing up, fingertips approximately behind where her clit is located, and then caressing her inner wall. Ask her how it feels to her. She’ll let you know if you’ve found it, but don’t turn it into a search for the holy grail – some women won’t feel anything special there.
Combining caresses of her G-spot with your fingers while licking her pussy effectively and productively, can result in the most amazing orgasms of her life.
Stroking inside her in a ‘come here, baby’ gesture, varying speed, location and pressure, is most effective.
Remember, women are not much like men in the way that they build to an orgasm, so be patient and be gentle. Also, pace yourself, it’s the 800 meters, not the 60 meter dash! Listen to her sounds – they may not be words – they’ll tell you when you’re doing well. Additionally, the movements of her body, especially her hands and hips send all kinds of messages – listen and respond.
If she tells you that she feels like she’s going to pee, listen to her and move along – unless you both like that. Similarly (but NOT the same), if you’re ultra-successful with some women, she’ll ejaculate, or ‘squirt.’ It’s somewhat uncommon, but entirely natural and harmless. Reassure her if she does and doesn’t know what it is, and take secret pride that you are an extremely masterful lover!
Preparation
Just feeling, and being, fresh and clean is an accepted part of human relations. And so it is (and usually should be) in love making. There may well be times, and philosophies, that avoid showering before making love – I have used them as a theme myself in erotic stories, and in relations with men and women that I knew very well.
But if you’re with someone new, really your default should be, "Am I going to smell, and taste, okay?" There’s no need to overdo it, but first impressions are important, right?
Couples, or threesomes (or more) who have been together before, should know each other well enough beforehand to know what level of preparation is necessary.
Hair
Let’s move on to pubic hair. Thankfully today, the trend is toward bare pussies (and often, cocks) to no more than a well-trimmed bush. In cunnilingus, the less hair, the better, although of course people can be turned on by wildly overgrown bushes. But when you’re trying to negotiate you face, lips and tongue through a thick forest of wiry pubic hair, it’s usually a major turn off.
If you wouldn’t be enthusiastic about finding a hair in your food, you’re probably not going to welcome it in the pussy you’re licking, either. Talk about it. Better to clarify the issue beforehand, than to both be disappointed – you, because you don’t want a mouth full of hair, her, because she likely won’t feel the wondrous sensation of warm, wet tongue stroking her labia and clit, when hair gets in the way.
There are several ways that she can reduce or eliminate her hair "down there." Shaving, whether with a feminine bikini razor, or with an electric shaver, is a common choice, along with waxing, laser hair removal, and depilatory creams.
Shaving
Shaving can include removing all pubic hair ("bald beaver"), or just leaving a small, trimmed bush in various shapes. A thin rectangle, aka "landing strip" is most common, and easiest to shape, although a small circle, or a triangle or star shape are also found. The more ornate shapes are sometimes found on the mousiest of girls, a discovery that never fails to amaze me.
She should follow the same simple practices that she uses when she shaves her legs, when shaving her vulva:
A leisurely soak in a warm bubble bath will make the hairs easier to cut.
After shampoo treatments can also soften hair. Conditioner is perfect for this.
Do the heavy cutting with scissors before shaving. This will make the shaving itself a LOT easier, as she can see what she’s doing.
Disposable razors are easiest – they won’t have bacteria from previous uses to cause infection, and most importantly, she won’t be wrecking your razor. Straight razors are not a good choice in areas like the vulva, with its many folds, nooks and crannies.
Stretch skin as it gets shaved, to better remove stubble and leave a smoother surface.
Use soaps, shaving cream and lotions for "sensitive skin." The vulva is sensitive!
Never use talcum powder afterward, but cornstarch is okay.
If she’s going to do it by herself, a mirror helps. But it’s more fun if she has help.
Cortisone cream is a good remedy for razor burn. You don’t want her to be sore there, do you?
Waxing
Waxing isn’t for everybody. It can cause ingrown hair problems, plus waxing is usually pretty painful, if only for a brief time. Think about how it would feel to have your balls waxed. It’s also more expensive than just shaving.
Having said that, if she’s willing to have it done, the process is pretty fast, and the results – a smooth vulva, last for about a month to a month and a
half. She should have the waxing done by a professional – her vulva is no place for an amateur to practice (waxing at least.)
Bikini waxing is intended to remove hair from areas that a bikini doesn’t cover. That won’t really help with the areas that cause problems during cunnilingus. For that, the "Brazilian" would be a better choice.
Your woman will need to completely buy into the procedure, or you could do your relationship more harm than good. For one thing, she’ll have to bare herself completely to a stranger. That may be okay with men, but it’s not something women usually do readily. And then there’s the pain, and the expense. If she’s not fully in agreement beforehand, without coercion, you may end up with a woman who resents the process, and being forced into it. It’s her body, after all.
And not in any effort to promote bi sex, but you’ll probably be better off if the waxing is done by another woman. Your woman will be way less stressed, and more comfortable with the whole process. That means that she’s more likely to be happy with you, and looking forward to feeling your hot, wet tongue on her pussy.
Just do your best to make her comfortable, and to make the process go easily for her. You should be doing that all the time, anyway! And once she has the process done, give her some space until her vulva is ready for action.
Laser Hair Removal
This is an effective way of removing pubic hair, but can only be performed in professional salons, or doctor’s offices. In terms of its popularity as a cosmetic improvement, it’s second only to Botox injections in numbers of procedures performed. It consists of a series of treatments over time, and may give excellent results over a long period. It works best with darker pigmented hair and lighter skin.
Depilatory Creams
Depilatory creams, or "hair removal creams," can be effective, but can be extremely irritating to sensitive tissues. Read and follow label instructions exactly to ensure satisfactory results and avoid problems.
The Male Partner and His Hair
Whether or not your partner has shaved, or waxed, or is going au naturel, there’s more hair that needs to go before you start munching that sweet little carpet – your facial hair.
Think about how it would feel to run a piece of sandpaper over your inner thighs, or even over your cock. It probably wouldn’t feel very nice, right? That’s exactly how your facial stubble, ie, your "five o’clock shadow" feels on the most sensitive part of your woman’s body. It’s really, really hard to get into the mood – even when you’re licking her correctly – if she’s in dread of the electric shock of your face against her skin.
Shave as close as possible to the time you’re going to have your face between her legs, although you don’t have to interrupt undressing her to go for a quick shave – a few hours before is fine, but you need a close shave. A fashionable amount of stubble really hurts, even more than a full beard. Otherwise, try putting a clean, dry wash cloth between your cheeks and her thighs, and don’t forget to keep any facial hair away from her clit. Even a single, stray, spiky hair jabbing into her clit will ruin the occasion.
Earning Your Red Wings – Yes or No?
It may sound like a complete no-no, and disgusting and gross, to suggest that you can have cunnilingus while she’s menstruating. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Yeah, "Earning your red wings" can be pretty embarrassing if you aren’t prepared for it, or if she didn’t tell you that she was menstruating, especially if you were both drunk and never even thought about it, but it’s rarely fatal (just kidding, it’s only the thought of it that might freak you out.)
Some men really like the idea of eating her pussy at that time, because it often brings her a great deal of comfort, or because she’s actually a lot hornier and ‘into it.’ And on the other side, are the men who want nothing to do with it. I’m not here to convert anyone, just to explain the best way to do it for those who want to do it.
Of course, if she doesn’t want to do it, you’re not going to do it. Some women don’t feel fully ‘fresh and clean,’ while menstruating, and if so, you should respect her wishes. Once again, as with anything relating to pleasing your partner (and yourself,) communication is paramount.
Using a tampon during cunnilingus while she’s menstruating, can solve most, if not all, of the concerns about stray fluids. If she’s bathed and put in a fresh tampon, you might have difficulty even knowing it’s her period, other than the string. If you confine your attention to the area around and at her clitoris (not just the clit itself – remember, it’s very sensitive), there shouldn’t be any problems.
Being Careful About Oral
Knowledge is one of the best ways (but not the only way) to protect yourself from sexually transmitted diseases (STDs.) The only infallible way to protect yourself from STDs is abstinence, or not bringing yourself in contact with another person’s sexual parts. The second best is to be aware of how to best protect yourself from an STD, and follow the best practices. Sometimes, in the heat of the moment, you might be tempted to forget safe procedures – you should be aware of that possibility.
If you’re with a new partner, you really should either inquire as to whether she’s been tested recently, and what the results were, or, failing that, follow recommended best practices. Unfortunately, there really aren’t any other choices.
If you’re in a stable relationship, you’ve both been tested and are free of STDs, and neither of you has other sexual partners, then you likely are free to indulge in unprotected sex. Be aware that steps recommended here to avoid STDs are not necessarily effective regarding conception, although the number of pregnancies resulting from cunnilingus is probably pretty low. Yes, that’s a joke.
So – what are the safe sexual practices that you can take regarding avoidance of STDs in a new partner? Basically, you need to avoid having her bodily fluids (vaginal fluids, blood, etc.) enter your body, through any openings or cuts/wounds.
Cunnilingus is a relatively low risk sexual practice, compared to anal or vaginal sex, insofar as spreading STDs are concerned. However, if you have bloody gums (especially after brushing teeth) or unhealed sores inside the mouth, you could possibly acquire an infection. Avoid brushing your teeth just before cunnilingus.
Analingus, aka rimming or ‘ass licking’ can also expose you to many pathogenic (harmful) micro-organisms.
Latex (a form of rubber) barriers over the woman’s vulva or anus can minimize your risk.
Simply, the barrier stops contact between the vulva or anus and your mouth. Be careful not to let it slip out of place to remain effective.
There are several types of barriers available:
Dental dam - A dental dam is a small, waterproof latex square placed over the vulva during cunnilingus or over the anus during analingus. A small amount of water based lubricant placed between the skin and dental dam can improve sensitivity and also keep the dam from sticking. Dental dams should never be used more than one time, to avoid potential infections. Dental dams can be found in your local drugstore or through the internet.
Plastic wrap - This is by far the least expensive, and easiest to find – just look in your local supermarket, or even easier, in your own kitchen – you probably already have it. Pros are: Because it’s thin, both of you can feel the other’s body (vulva or tongue) almost as if it weren’t there. The con is: Because it’s thin, it can rip easily, especially in the heat of passion. If you decide to use it, a few drops of lube on her vulva can improve sensitivity.
Condom cut into a dental dam - If you cut the tip end off an unrolled condom, then make one cut lengthwise, you’ll end up with a rectangle. Voila, a dental dam! Plus, if you chose correctly originally, it can be in your favorite flavor and color! Condoms are available in drugstores, many supermarkets, and from self-service dispensers in some bar and gas station restrooms.
Women Are NOT Balloons
It is not funny to blow air into the vagina, as if you were blowing up a balloon. Because blood vessels are so close to the surface of
the vaginal lining, you run the risk of forcing air into the woman’s bloodstream, which can cause an embolus. An embolus is a bubble of air that can lead to a life-threatening condition, and even death.
This is rare, and generally is related to events during or after pregnancy. It is not related to air that is forced into the vagina during sex, and later expels, usually making a hilarious sound, known popularly as a "queef" or "vart" (vaginal fart). Blowing air across her vulva, or over her clit, both external areas of her body, will not cause any harm, and may very well increase her pleasure.
Keeping Things Clean and Fresh
#1st#It’s really just good common sense, and an overall better time for everyone concerned, if good personal hygiene is an important factor in cunnilingus. A woman’s vagina is extremely attractive and appealing to all the senses, including taste and smell, in my opinion, but is more likely to be enticing, if not mouth-watering, when it is healthy and hygienic. Not every "cleaning product" that’s available is necessarily right for a woman’s intimate opening, however.
Hygiene products
As surprising as it might sound, antibacterial soaps and washes may not be a good choice to clean the vagina or vulva. There is a delicate balance of bacteria that we want to maintain in those areas. Antibacterial products commit warfare across the spectrum of these inhabitants, ironically leaving a bacteria-free desert that is subsequently infested by "bad" bacteria later, or by other micro-organisms like yeast.
Blow Her Mind: His Illustrated Guide to Orgasmic Oral Sex So Good She'll Tell her Friends About It! Master Advanced Cunnilingus Tonight Page 3
