Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree: A Red Velvet Christmas Novel

by K E Osborn

  Tensing up angry tears spill from my eyes. “Jesus Christ Brax, they used a five-year-old boy as a decoy?” I ask wondering if I had this down right.

  He exhales and nods once. The tears falling from my eyes burning my cheeks as they flow scorching the skin all the way to my chin. He brings his hand up and wipes my tears away.

  “I can stop if you want?” he asks.

  I shake my head. “No, I want to know what happened,” I answer honestly, even though hearing this painful side of Brax’s life is making me hurt for him.

  He nods once again and leans down kissing my forehead, pulling back he tucks some hair behind my ear and caresses my cheek wiping away another tear.

  “When I woke up, I was in a dark room. My arms were killing me, then I realized they were above my head tied in metal cuffs and suspended by chains from the ceiling. I started to panic straight away, being a prisoner of war was something they trained you for, but something I was never prepared for, nor did I think would ever actually happen. I glanced around the room and saw Baxter and Flynn both in the same position as me. We were all shirtless and only had on our camo pants and boots. I called out to wake the guys up, and as they did an extremist came in sporting an old fashioned whip and a large bucket of water. We all looked as he smiled at us so evilly I thought he was the devil incarnate. Another man came in carrying what was clearly an electric cattle prod and the torture began. I don’t want to scare you with the details, but they took it in turns electrocuting, whipping and water torturing us for information on the English troops. The problem was they had abducted the three lowest-ranking soldiers in our unit, so the information we knew was, at best minimal, and any information we did know we wouldn’t tell them anyway. They starved us and beat us, torturing us all for a month, scarring our bodies with cuts and burns.”

  I look down and see the wounds he’s talking about scarring his beautiful chest, and I gently run my fingers over them wishing I could take away the emotional scars that they hold. My tears are cascading onto his chest like a waterfall in the middle of winter, the rivulets of salt water burn my eyes as I blink the tears away.

  “Eventually the torture and lack of food and water was too much for Flynn. He was losing it and he needed to get out. Somehow Flynn dislocated his thumbs and got free from his chains. We begged him not to try and run, but he was determined to get out. Just as he was about to run out the door, the extremists came in. They scrambled around and Flynn was so weak they simply pushed him to the ground and he collapsed in a heap. Baxter and I were screaming at them to show mercy, but they were fired up, they wanted to show the infidels how weak we really were and how we had no power in their space. Flynn begged for his life, but with one quick raise of a handgun the trigger was pulled and they shot Flynn right between the eyes…” he trails off, deep in thought then continues, “Baxter threw up, as I closed my eyes begging internally for them to shoot me too. I just wanted it to be over with, but I was only dying on the inside. They left Flynn’s rotting corpse on the floor for days as a reminder not to try an escape. I’d lost all hope, my life was going to end in that hell hole. Two weeks after Flynn died a massive commotion stirred in the compound. Flash grenades sounded, and as I looked up at Baxter, his eyes shone as brightly as mine in the hope that either this was either our end or that our men had finally come for us. It was the latter.”

  I breathe out a relieved sigh, even though I know he obviously got out because he’s here with me now, his story is gripping and I’m literally hanging onto every word.

  “I was so lucky to get out of there alive, by that stage I was knocking on death’s door and so was Baxter. I really am lucky they found us when they did. But honestly Amber, the things I’ve told you tonight isn’t even half the things I’ve seen and that’s only the mild stuff. I won’t go into the worst of it because I don’t want to scare you, just know war is a ghastly thing.”

  Opening my eyes wide at his words I actually start shaking, wondering how it could be any worse than what he’s told me. No wonder he has nightmares. It’s a wonder the guy is even slightly sane. My heart is hammering in my chest as a knot forms tightly in my stomach at the thought of Brax being caught up in all that. At the thought that he nearly didn’t make it back, and that he might not even be here now. I sniff back my tears as I look up at him and caress his cheek tenderly feeling the stubble under my palm reminding me just how fragile life really is.

  “You’re amazing you know that?” I whisper and he shakes his head and closes his eyes clenching them tight like he’s fighting with his inner demons.

  “No, I’m not. I should have tried harder to save more people. I shouldn’t have followed orders—”

  I pull his face forcefully for him to look at me. “Hey, you did what you had to do. Nothing you could have done differently would have saved them Brax. You can’t take that on,” I say meaning every word.

  He winces and nods. “I can’t help but wish things were different. Turned out different. You know?”

  I smile at him and nod. “I know. But you’re alive and you’re living your life. You need to try and let go of the past and not let it haunt you.”

  He takes in a long deep breath. “If only it were that simple.”

  “You’re a hero, Brax.”

  He scoffs. “I was doing my duty and there’s nothing heroic in that. Saving all those women and children from those savage animals would have been heroic. Instead, I left them all there, because they weren’t the mission.”

  I hug him and lean up kissing his lips softly, feeling his lips against mine and knowing everything he’s been through only makes it all the more special.

  “You’re my hero. You saved me tonight,” I say trying to change the subject slightly.

  He smiles and leans in caressing my cheek then moves in and presses his lips to me passionately. His tongue dances with mine and all the emotional heaviness that was flooding the room is shifting into something lighter. His hand moves to my breast and he massages it gently causing a shiver to run up my spine. I love the way my body reacts to his touch. His kiss intensifies and he shifts his weight so he moves me over and rolls on top of me. Smiling through the kiss, my hands run through his hair and I hold him to me. My heart fluttering in the emotion of it all. Suddenly, he pulls his lips from mine as we both pant catching our breaths. He rests his forehead on mine and smiles brightly, then as quick as a flash he’s moving off me and stands up picking up his briefs and starts to get dressed. Furrowing my brows wondering what the hell is going on.

  Did I push him too far?

  Did telling me all that stuff change something between us?

  “What are you doing?”

  “It’s getting late, I should let you get some sleep,” he says confusing me.

  “You can sleep here…if you want?” I ask while he pulls his jeans up.

  He winces and shakes his head. “That’s not a good idea.” He pulls his shirt over his head.

  Swallowing a lump that’s formed in my throat, I simply stare at him. He looks at me and exhales coming to sit on the edge of my bed. “I want to, I do. But I think me being caught coming out of your room in the morning would be a bad look,” he says and I tense up and look down at the blanket.

  “Are you embarrassed by me?”

  He grabs my face either side and forces me to look at him. My breathing is rushed as I feel a little rejected.

  “If I could shout it from the rooftops that I liked you I would. But Hunter and Mason are already making our lives difficult, and the last thing I want is for Hunter to fire me. Then I’d never see you. I’m thinking of our relationship here, Amber,” he says and I nod and half smile.

  “They are making life hard, aren’t they?”

  He smiles and pulls me closer then kisses my lips. “Yes, they are. I better go. Sleep well,” he says kissing my nose. Then he stands up, picking up his shoes and walks toward the door, his feet heavy on the carpet thumping along with my heartbeat only making it more obvious it�
��s beating rapidly. The clunk of the door when it closes feels like the door is closing on a chapter of Brax and Amber, and if I didn’t know better, I’d think Brax was shutting down a little.

  I take a deep breath and sigh. That story was unbelievable!

  Over the next week, Brax and I find ways to sneak around while no one is watching, snatching stolen kisses and cuddles when we can. Each night he comes to my room and we go through the same dance. We have wild, passionate sex, cuddle for a long while, then just as I feel comfortable enough and think that he might actually stay—just as I start to get sleepy—his shoulders tense, his breathing escalates and his words become evasive as he leaves for his own room. Every night he leaves me wondering why he doesn’t want to spend the night with me. Is it purely because he doesn’t want Hunter to find out, or is it because he honestly just doesn’t want to sleep next to me? The thought is unsettling making my anxiety peak every time he walks out my door.

  At first I was hurt, now the emotion is turning into annoyance. I want to talk to him about it, but I don’t know how to bring it up, and basically I’m a little scared as to what his answer might be.

  The tour is heading to Aberdeen and Brax is excited because his family’s coming to the show to watch Red Velvet perform. Which means he not only gets to see his family, but I’m going to meet them, which after knowing him for only a few weeks, I have to say, is a little daunting. My stomach’s been twisting on itself all day at the thought of meeting his parents. His siblings I’m not so worried about, but I want to make a good impression on his parents in case this ‘thing’ with him goes further than whatever it is we’re doing at the moment. I know we both care for each other, but his aversion to spending the night with me makes me wonder if this is just sex for him and nothing more?

  As I fuss about my dress in the green room at the pub, the noises fade into the background blending into a persistent hum as I warm up my vocal cords. I know it’s nearly time to head on stage and Brax’s family is probably here. My heart is thrumming harder than my normal pre-show buzz and the small beads of sweat forming on my forehead are a dead giveaway that my anxiety is starting to peak. Rubbing my shaking sweaty palms on my dress as I pace the red stained carpet, my feet feel like lead weights as I shuffle them along the floor.

  “Amber,” Brax’s deep voice soothes me slightly, but when I look up my heart lurches into my throat. Standing with him are four people I’ve never seen before, two women and two men. My breath catches as I wipe my shaking sweaty hands again as they all walk up to me smiling brightly.

  “Shit,” I mumble to myself plastering on a fake smile.

  “Amber, meet my parents Sandra and Oscar, and my brother Derek, and little brat sister, Evie.”

  I look at them all and see where Brax gets his good looks. His dad is tall and stocky with salt and pepper hair, his chiselled jaw is soft as he smiles at me and his green eyes sparkle against the dim light of the room. His mother’s blonde hair reminds me of my mother. It stops my heart in my chest for the briefest of moments before she pulls me into a tight embrace, wrapping her arms around me taking me by surprise. I giggle slightly as I embrace her back. I look at Brax, who chuckles while Sandra holds me at an arm’s length. I bite my lips together to try and stop myself from laughing at the awkwardness I feel.

  “God, you’re right, Alex. She is beautiful,” Sandra says. I look at Brax and smirk as he glances at me and winks.

  “It’s n…nice t…to meet you,” I somehow stutter out, my nerves getting the better of me. Inwardly I cringe at my own ineptitude.

  “Oh honey, the way Alex has been talking about you it’s like we already know you, and you’re a part of the family, right guys?” Sandra says and Oscar and Derek laugh as Evie grins placing her hand on my arm gently. Her perfect smile lights up the room. Chocolate curls fall beautifully over her shoulders and her delicate features make her look younger than her tender age of twenty.

  “Oh yes, I’ve always wanted a sister and I know we could practically be best friends,” Evie says and my eyes open wide as she beams with honest excitement.

  I giggle nervously. I’ve never known people to be so forward and accepting of someone before. His family is amazing.

  “Oh God, guys, ease up a bit. Don’t smother her.” Brax’s eyes are furrowed as he looks at me like he’s worried they’re scaring me off.

  Smiling, I’m trying to ease his concern. “Well, I only have a stinky brother, so a sister would be a nice change,” I say and Evie jumps on the spot wrapping her arm around my shoulders.

  “This is so exciting being backstage with a rock star who’s dating my brother. Could this get any better?”

  My heart races in my chest at the thought that Brax has told his family that we’re dating? Looking at him, his chest is rising and falling quickly watching me as I raise an eyebrow in confusion. I had no idea we had a label.

  I mean, are there feelings? Yes, for sure.

  Have we slept together? Yes, multiple times.

  But dating? I had no idea he saw us that way, and to be honest, I didn’t think he saw me as anything more than sex with the way he’s been leaving me night after night. I’m so confused right now, and the squeak of my teeth grinding together as I breathe through my nose sends a chill down my spine.

  “Okay guys, Amber has to go on stage now. Head out, so she can get ready and I’ll meet you out there,” Brax announces glancing from me to his family, then back to me furrowing his eyebrows as his breathing hitches up a notch like he’s panicking.

  “Okay, and again pleased to meet you, Amber. We’ll see you after the show. Good luck, break a leg or whatever it is you’re supposed to say,” Sandra says.

  Smiling, I nod letting out a small giggle even though my insides are burning.

  “Thanks, guys, enjoy the show.” Waving I watch as his family all exit happily out of the green room away from the tension that’s expanding inside me. Looking up at Brax, his shoulders slump and he looks down at me once they’re out of sight. His hands come to rest heavily, feeling like the weight of the world is now resting firmly on my shoulders.

  “The whole dating thing…” he pauses looking down into my eyes.

  “Mmm,” is all I can manage in response.

  He swallows hard. “It doesn’t have to be a big deal if you don’t want it to be. I let it slip to Evie that I liked you and that we had a connection, and she assumed we were dating. It was easier to let her think that than to try and explain what is going on,” he clarifies, but not very clearly because now I’m confused.

  “Well, what is going on Brax?”

  He looks at me and his eyes dart around trying to focus on something, eventually finding their focus back on my eyes after I exhale catching his attention.

  “I don’t know, I like you. A lot. I like spending time with you, and I hate hiding it behind closed doors and keeping it from Hunter and Mase. I just want to be able to kiss you in public.” His hand comes up caressing my cheek and I bite my bottom lip in response.

  I want that too, but Hunter won’t be so accepting, and Mase will be devastated. No this has to stay a secret, whatever this is.

  “I know it’s hard, but this is how it has to be for now. And anyway, you can’t even stay the night with me. You can’t be that serious about me if you can’t stand to sleep next to me.”

  He furrows his brows and shakes his head letting out a frustrated exhale. “Amber, I want to sleep next to you. I want to sleep with you in my arms all night long. Trust me, I want that so bad it hurts—”

  “Then what the fuck, Brax?”

  He chuckles and caresses my face further. “It’s complicated.”

  I groan in annoyance. “Then tell me, I might understand—”

  “Amber, please don’t push this—”

  “Time to go on stage Amber,” Hunter calls out walking in to see Brax with his hand on my cheek and us standing in very close proximity. We quickly back away from each other while Hunter glares in our direction w
ith cold, flinty eyes. His nostrils flaring and his face reddening into such a deep crimson, I feel that if one of us doesn’t say something soon, the pulsating vein in his forehead might actually explode.

  “Okay, I’m coming now,” I reply and start walking toward him.

  Brax follows and Hunter’s eyes dart from me to him. My quivering, twitchy muscles roll as a flutter fills my stomach and not in a good way. I lick my lips as my dry mouth reminds me of my nerves, but this isn’t pre-show nerves, this is Hunter’s disapproval nerves. Hunter grabs my arm as I walk past him stopping me in my tracks. I glance up at him, my heart racing faster by the minute at what he might say.

  Please don’t make me hate you.

  “Keep your mind on the job, Amber, and your daughter.” His words slice through his gritted teeth, the dim light shining against Hunter’s glistening eyes makes me tense up. It shows me he’s emotional about this. He saw a moment between Brax and me that he shouldn’t have, and now he knows there’s definitely something happening behind the scenes. He was bound to find out sooner or later.

  “Hunt, I need to be on stage.”

  With a grunt, his tight fingers around my arm ease their grip and he lets me go. Breathing a relieved sigh, I walk past him and don’t look back. Hoping nothing I’ve said or done is a problem between Hunter and Brax, but I don’t stick around to find out. My feet race quickly toward the stage, their light movement on the wooden floorboards sends butterflies into my tummy wondering if the quick speed will trip me up. It doesn’t. I reach the stairs and race up them to see the guys all preparing their instruments for the gig. Mase turns to see me jogging up the stairs and the beam from the spotlight catches his face, and only seems to enhance his smile showing his dimples. The way he smiles at me makes me feel like I could conquer the world. My lungs expand as I pull in a deep breath and stride over to the front of the stage. Even though Mase looks at me and I feel good about myself, I know I can’t return the gaze he’s sending. I don’t feel like he does, and I don’t want to give him the wrong impression.