by Nikki Paris
I slid into the lingerie and stared at my reflection in my floor-length mirror. Did I look like a child? Would Burke still want me once he saw all of me? This was a huge step. Was I ready?
Stop it, Charlie. You’re hot, and you’re a grown-ass woman.
I put my clothes back on and dug my broken eyeliner pencil out of my makeup drawer. Matteo said it made my eyes pop, and Burke liked my eyes. I let out a deep breath and smoothed my hair. Then I grabbed Tess’s present off my dresser and hurried down the stairs.
I paused by the car tree and felt an all too familiar ache. It was the ache of missing my dad. There was nothing else like it in the world.
I let a few tears escape and slid off the red convertible I’d chosen when I was ten. Tess loved the car tree idea. I wanted to pass it on to her. It felt like keeping my dad alive by passing on his memories and traditions. I slipped the car ornament into Tess’s bag, wiped my tears, and turned to leave.
Bea stopped me right as I was about to escape out the front door. “Charlie, It’s Christmas Eve! Where are you going?” Bea frowned at me from the top of the stairs. Sophia was perched on my sister’s hip, dressed in a candy cane-striped onesie and sucking on her fingers.
“I have to drop off a gift for a friend’s daughter. I’ll be back in a few hours!” I hurried up the stairs to kiss Sophia. She patted my cheek with her slobbery fingers and gave me a cheesy grin. “Night night, baby girl! I’ll see you in the morning!”
“A friend’s daughter? You have friends with kids? Since when, Charlie?”
I shrugged and headed back down the stairs. “Since now.” I wasn’t lying to Bea. I told her exactly where I was going. I just didn’t give her a name. I knew my sister. She’d go ape-shit-drama-queen on me in three seconds flat.
“Who’s the friend? Have I met them?”
“Charlie, are you leaving?” My mom wandered out of the kitchen where she’d been busy putting away leftovers.
Inwardly, I groaned. Outwardly, I smiled. “Just dropping a gift off to a friend. I’ll be back in a few hours. Don’t do the dishes, mom. They’ve got my name all over them.”
“Which friend? Didn’t you see Matteo this morning?”
Sophia saved me by taking that exact moment to cry and try to squirm out of Bea’s arms.
Thanks, spawn.
I slipped out the door as my mother and sister’s attention turned to Sophia.
16
Burke
I burned the shit out of dinner because I was wondering what Charlie’s nipples looked like. Fuck, I was insane for giving in. Maybe I wouldn’t. I still had time to back out. Charlie wasn’t even here yet.
“Daddy!” Tess groaned. “You burned the rolls and the mac and cheese!”
I laughed. “I sure did, sweetheart. Let’s order pizza.”
“Thank. God.”
I blinked in surprise at my daughter. “Where’d that attitude come from?”
“What’s attitude?”
“It’s when you’re not being very nice to your dad.” I gave Tess a pointed look while I pulled out my laptop to order pizza.
The doorbell rang, and Tess ran to open it. “Charlie!” Tess squealed and threw her arms around our guest. Charlie looked beautiful in a pair of tight black jeans and an over-sized red sweater. I wanted to rip them off of her. Her shiny, light brown hair looked wavy and soft. I wanted to pull it.
“Hi, Tess! Merry Christmas!” Charlie leaned down to wrap my daughter in a warm embrace. She kissed the top of Tess’s head and held out a gift bag to her. “I got you a present!”
Tess grinned, grabbed the bag from Charlie’s hand, and then raced over to the couch to open it.
“Tess, what do we say?” I called after my daughter.
“Thank you!” Tess was already throwing tissue paper on the floor.
I could feel Charlie’s eyes on me, and it made my heart race. I turned my gaze to her. “Hey, cutie.”
“Hey.” She bit her lip and stepped into my kitchen. Her gorgeous blue eyes scanned the mess that used to be dinner, and she burst out laughing. “Burke, did you burn all the food?”
Tess yelled over from the living room, “Yes! We ordered pizza! You should have come earlier to stop him from burning stuff.” She joined us in the kitchen with a purple teddy bear wearing a sparkly pink dress tucked under her arm and something small clutched in her left hand. “Look, daddy!” Tess held up the bear with a smile. “It’s so cute! I’m going to name it Pinky.”
Charlie laughed. “Pinky? What about Purpley?”
Tess laughed and shook her head. “You’re trying to make me like purple better, but it’s not gonna happen, sis.”
Charlie laughed again and pulled Tess in for a hug. “Did you just call me sis?”
“Yup. My mom says that’s what girls call their friends.”
“Tess, what’s in your hand?” I asked.
Tess dangled a little matchbox car ornament with a grin. “Is this like the ones you made with your daddy?”
Charlie nodded. “We made that one when I was ten, and I wanted you to have it.”
“Thanks! It’s so cool! I’m going to hang it on the tree!”
Tess hurried over to the little tree to hang the car. While she was busy searching for the perfect branch, I grabbed Charlie’s hand and tugged her into my arms. My chest felt tight with emotion because I knew how much that little matchbox car meant to her, and she chose to share it with my little girl. “You’re amazing, Charlie Cox. Thank you.” I pressed a quick kiss to her lips and then backed away before Tess turned around.
Tess hurried back into the kitchen before Charlie could respond. “Do you wanna see what my daddy got me for Christmas?” She led Charlie down the hall, still chattering. “Did you bring my daddy a present? I made him a picture frame out of popsicle sticks, and he loved it! I have extra craft stuff if you want to make him one, too.”
I laughed and shrugged when Charlie glanced over her shoulder and caught my eye. “I do like popsicle stick picture frames.”
Charlie flashed me her cute little smile and followed Tess into her bedroom.
◆◆◆
Lexi called halfway through dinner to tell me she needed Tess back early. Lexi and a few of her mom friends had decided last minute to go and see Christmas lights, and they were already on their way to pick her up. I swallowed my irritation and helped Tess pack up her things. Tess didn’t need me to lose my shit over this.
Charlie gave my daughter a long hug and ran her fingers through Tess’s soft hair. “Merry Christmas, Tess. I hope you have such a good morning and that Santa brings you everything you want.”
Then I walked Tess down to the icy parking lot, where her mother was waiting. After I helped my daughter into the car, I stopped to give Lexi a pointed look. “This wasn’t part of the deal, Lex.”
She pursed her lips and nodded. “I know. I’m sorry. I’ll try to plan better.” Then she drove away, and I knew she wouldn’t really try harder. Lexi was full of shit.
When I made it back up to my apartment, Charlie was curled up on my couch, staring at my Christmas tree. Her eyes flashed up to meet mine, filled with wild nerves. “Hey,” she almost whispered.
“Hey.” I sat beside her, and she leaned in for a kiss, her whole body trembling. Was she worried that I was going to fuck her now? Damn, I wanted to, but I wouldn’t if she was scared. “Cutie, you don’t have to sleep with me tonight. We can take it slow.”
Charlie frowned and pulled away from me. “I want to. I’m just a little nervous.” She looked down at her lap and wrapped a strand of hair around her pointer finger. “I don’t want to disappoint you.”
“That’s not possible, Charlie.”
She nodded and stood to unbutton her jeans.
I grinned and took both of her hands in mine. “I very much want to see what’s under those clothes, but we don’t need to rush.” I was hard for her, but I could wait. “Come here.” I patted my lap. “Let’s talk for a minute.”
; Charlie curled up on my lap like a sexy little kitten and rested her head against my chest. I took her hand in mine and pressed it against my racing heart. “You feel that, Charlie? You make me nervous, too.” She gave me a soft smile, and I continued, “Look, I’ve only been with three other women.” And one of those women had been less than impressed with what I had to offer in bed for the last ten years. These weren’t details I usually shared with anyone, but Charlie seemed so damn nervous. I wanted to reassure her that there was no way she could disappoint me.
Charlie frowned at me. “Seriously?”
I tipped her chin up to catch her lips in a gentle kiss. “Seriously. Are you second-guessing asking me to fuck you now?”
Charlie bit her lip and a soft smile danced across her lips. “No. But… why only three?”
I gazed into her eyes. “I don’t like shallow flings. They’re more effort than they’re worth.” I did that once, about a year before I met Lexi. It only took me two weeks to realize I hated that kind of relationship. I wanted a deep connection or none at all.
Something like respect filled Charlie’s eyes, and I felt a little of the tension in her body melt away. “I don’t like them, either.” She slid her hands up my chest and brushed her lips against my cheek. I felt her warm breath against my skin and ached to feel her everywhere.
“Charlie, I want to make you feel good because you’re so damn special. I don’t want to disappoint you either.”
She lifted her head and smiled at me. “That’s not possible, Burke.” Charlie leaned in and pressed her soft minty lips into mine. “It feels like my whole body lights on fire when we kiss.” Her voice had that sexy, husky quality again, and my cock strained against my jeans.
“I feel the same way.” I gazed into those pretty blue eyes. The reflection from the Christmas tree lights made them even brighter. “I can’t stop wanting you, Charlie, and I’m not the kind of guy that wants things.”
She kissed me again, this time with more force and depth. Charlie buried her hands in my hair and turned her body to straddle me while we kissed. I met her passion, following her lead, determined to hold back until she was ready. Charlie kissed me harder and harder and centered herself on my cock. I groaned into her mouth when she started rocking her hips against me.
Charlie tipped her head back and guided my mouth down to her neck, still grinding into me. I kissed my way down to her collarbone and back up to her jaw while she rocked harder and harder against me.
Fuck. Charlie didn’t kiss like a college kid with no experience. She met my gaze for a second, breathing heavily before she snapped her eyes shut and moaned. Her pretty little mouth fell open, and she gripped handfuls of my shirt. Her hip movements slowed, and she moaned again before collapsing against me.
It was the sexiest sound I’d ever heard in my life. I wanted to hear it again and again ––more than I wanted air. “You okay, Charlie?” I gripped her hips and pressed my lips to her ear.
“Uh…” Charlie panted and shook her head. “I just… um, I just…had an orgasm.” She cast her eyes downward and bit her lip. “Was that weird?”
I groaned and squeezed her ass. “No, Charlie. It was hot as fuck. I’m going to carry your sexy ass into my bedroom now and give you another one.” I pulled her body against mine and kissed her neck again. “Would that be all right, cutie?” I shouldn’t do this, but I was going to because I was insane with a want that bordered on need.
Charlie’s breath caught, and she grabbed my face with both hands. “Yes, Burke.”
I scooped her up in my arms and carried her down the hall to my bedroom. I had to remind myself to be gentle when I laid her down in the middle of my bed. I had to force myself not to rip her clothes off with my teeth. The desire I had for cute little Charlie and her sweet body was almost uncontrollable. But I had to control it. I wouldn’t hurt her.
I slid her jeans down and groaned at the sight of her black lace panties. Her sweater came off next to reveal a matching lace bra. “Fuck, Charlie.”
“It is too much?” she asked, eyes full of worry.
“It’s so sexy, cutie. It’s fucking perfect.”
Charlie propped herself up on her elbows. “Take your clothes off, too. I want to see you.”
I tugged my shirt off over my head and tossed it to the floor, followed by my pants and boxers. Charlie’s eyes raked over my body, settling on my cock. “Damn,” she whispered.
I hovered over her, careful not to crush her under my weight, and ran soft kisses down her neck. Her breathing was heavy, and she seemed afraid to touch me. “I won’t do anything until you’re ready,” I whispered in her ear.
She wrapped her arms around my waist and ran her hands down my back, meeting my gaze with a determined one. “I’m ready.”
17
Charlie
Burke had tattoos on his back and chest, too — all black ink and sexy as hell. And like, I’d seen dicks before. I took a health class. I’d watched a porn video or two while I touched myself. I’d even felt one through a pair of jeans when I drunkenly made out with a stranger at one of Matteo’s parties.
But I’d never had my hands on one, and good god, Burke had a big fucking cock. How the hell was it going to fit inside me? Super-sized tampons were uncomfortable!
My nerves were crashing through the damn roof, but I wanted this. I wanted him.
Burke’s mouth explored my body, and it felt so incredible that I was starting to think I could calm the fuck down and enjoy this. His tongue was teasing the strip of skin right above my panties, and his big, strong hands gripped my hips. The tense muscles in his back and arms told me he was holding back, and I was grateful. Maybe next time, I’d be ready for him to lose control.
Oh god, was there going to be a next time? Was he enjoying this? I should touch him, too. I brushed my fingers gently against his muscled shoulders, then slid them up his neck and into his hair. Fuck. His skin was warm and smooth. Oh god, his hands were on my panties now. Oh god, what if he didn’t like what he saw?
Burke slid my panties down my legs and tossed them on the floor. His green eyes studied me, so exposed, and I felt like glass again. “Fuck, Charlie.” His voice was impossibly low and deep. “Can I touch you?”
I gulped and nodded. He slid back up my body and pressed a gentle kiss to my lips, then turned me on my side. Burke pressed himself into my back, his hard cock against my ass, and wrapped both arms around me. I struggled to draw breath as he slid one finger down my slit, then two.
I thought his hands would be rough, but Burke was careful and gentle as he circled my clit. It was embarrassing how fast I reached my climax, and I couldn’t control myself and stop making noises. Fuck!
Burke pressed his cock a little harder into my ass while I rode my orgasm with all of my embarrassing sighs and moans. When I finished, he didn’t say a word, just lifted me onto his lap like I weighed nothing. Now I was straddling him, and his cock was against my swollen clit. Burke gazed into my eyes and ran his hands through my hair. “You’re so pretty it hurts, Charlie.” His hands slid down my back and unhooked my bra. When it fell away, he took my breasts in his mouth.
I let out this weird, low moan and clapped a hand over my mouth. “Sorry!” My voice was too high now. God, could I maybe pick an octave and stick with it? “I don’t know why I keep making those weird noises!”
Burke dragged his mouth away from my tits and grinned at me. “I like them. Those sexy little noises let me know if I’m touching you right.” He flipped me over so that I was on my back and pressed my thighs apart. “Charlie, you are going to feel so damn good. I’m fucking dying to get inside you, but I need you to tell me when you’re ready.”
I swallowed and nodded, staring hard at his massive cock.
Burke watched my face, desire pouring from his eyes. It made me feel sexy. “Touch me, Charlie. I want you to touch me, please.” His voice sounded tight and strained. It made me feel needed.
His was the first cock I’d ever wanted to
touch, but I didn’t know how. I slid up to my knees and reached out, hoping Burke couldn’t see how much my hands were shaking. I ran my fingers down his cock. It was smoother than I thought it would be. I gripped the base with my left hand, and Burke groaned and closed his eyes.
Maybe touching a cock wasn’t so hard. Maybe you just touched it. I leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his tip.
“Fuck, Charlie!” Burke’s breathing was getting heavy, and it made me feel powerful. I stroked his cock a few times, gaining a little confidence every time he groaned. He was right. The sounds were helpful.
Finally, I released him and lay back on his pillows. “I’m ready, Burke.”
His gorgeous green eyes popped open, and he let out a sharp breath. “You sure?”
“Yes.”
He stood and grabbed a condom from his top dresser drawer. I watched as he slid it onto his length with my heart racing. I was about to lose my virginity to this delicious, chiseled, sweet, god-like man. Things were never going to be the same. You couldn’t go back to who you were after a man like Burke.
Burke hovered over me, pressing his tip against my entrance. “I’ll go slow, Charlie. Stop me if it hurts, okay?”
“Okay.” I sounded breathless.
He pressed into me little and groaned out loud. “You okay, cutie?”
“Yes.” It didn’t hurt yet. It was just an uncomfortable, stretched-out feeling. Burke slid in half an inch deeper, and the discomfort increased, but I was okay. “You can do more.”
He gave me a little more, then slid back out. He did this a few times like he was getting me used to the feeling before pressing even deeper. I felt a sharp pain and snapped my eyes closed. “Ah!”
“Fuck! Sorry. I’ll stop.”
I opened my eyes and gripped his hips. “No. I’m fine. Keep going.” It was the membrane thing, which meant the most painful part was over. It wasn’t even that bad. And holy shit, I wasn’t a virgin anymore.
Burke pushed in and out of me several more times before his breathing quickened. I was just lying there like an idiot. I didn’t know what to do with my body. It helped to know that he hadn’t been with hundreds of experienced women, but I still couldn’t get out of my own head.
