Wedding Haters (Event to Remember Series-Book 2)

by Melissa Baldwin

  Wedding Haters

  A Novel

  By Melissa Baldwin

  To all my girlfriends—you know we’ve all hated a wedding at some point.

  Chapter 1

  This could very well be the most amazing place in the universe. I’m still in awe that this is happening to me. I would keep pinching myself, but I’m starting to get weird marks on my arms, and pretty soon, people are going to start talking. I don’t know what exactly they would say, but you never know with all the haters out there. I actually just read one of those funny e-cards on Facebook and it said, “Cheers to my haters, the best is yet to come.” I admit I have a (small) addiction to those funny e-cards.

  I walk around the ballroom and envision my wedding day-- too bad October seems so far away. I’m not the most patient person in the world. OK, truth be told, I’m not patient at all. My fiancé Cole on the other hand is extremely patient, or it could be that he is so laid back that patience is not of any importance to him. He’s a stand-up comedian, and as you can imagine, he hardly takes anything seriously. However, his marriage proposal was a big production.

  After one of his shows, he actually hired people to approach him and ask him for his autograph. He introduced me as his girlfriend and then said, “I’m hoping she will become my fiancée tonight.” The lady he hired then proceeded to take off her wedding ring and tell him to kneel down and ask me. It turns out she had my ring the whole time. People were cheering, and I sat there like an idiot wondering exactly what had happened. OK, I know how this sounds, but it really was the most romantic and fun thing that has ever happened to me. I’m sure it will be a story that our great-great-great-grandchildren will talk about.

  “Madie, earth to Madie. Hello, wake up?” I notice my best friend Sienna is waving her hand frantically trying to get my attention.

  “Well? Are you happy with everything so far?” she asks smugly as she folds her arms. She’s obviously proud of herself and already knows what my answer is going to be.

  “Are you kidding? Yes!” I exclaim.

  The truth is I’m beyond pleased with everything. Sienna recently launched her own event planning company, and she has done really well so far. She spent years working for a well-known event company and possibly the most horrible human being to ever walk the earth. Since then, she built a name for herself, and it has paid off. And now my wedding is turning into one of the biggest events of the century. Who knew?

  I wish I could say that I haven’t been one of those bridezillas you hear about. But that would be a lie. I mean, I’m not completely impossible or anything like that. I would say indecisive would be a more fitting word. In my defense, unlike the majority of the state of California, I’m planning on doing this only once. That means only one wedding, one marriage, to one man for the rest of my life.

  As I walk around, I remember when I was growing up I had pictured myself dancing under twinkling Christmas lights in a recreation center or maybe a church gym. Not that there is anything wrong with having a wedding in either of those places, believe me I would marry Cole in a parking lot if I had to. I guess to some people a wedding in the ballroom of a hotel may not be that glamorous, but to me it is. I feel like royalty!

  There’s only one problem; I’m having a difficult time choosing everything that I want. Like I said, I tend to be a tad bit indecisive. But honestly, why do I only have to choose one dress or one cake? There are so many possibilities out there, and thankfully, Sienna is level-headed enough to keep me grounded. I have a feeling I’m about to drive her to start drinking, a lot.

  I take a break from my daydreaming to glance at my phone. A feeling of dread comes over me as I’m thrown back into reality. Crap! I’m going to be late for my next appointment.

  “AHHHH!” I scream. “I have to go. Mrs. Wilson is going to be at the salon in twenty minutes.”

  “See you later.” I hear Sienna yell as I sprint out of the ballroom. I’m a freelance hair stylist and Mrs. Wilson is a “special” client. In other words, she’s also a close friend of my grandmother’s, and I will hear about it until the end of time if she is unhappy or if I’m late. Every time I see her name on my schedule, I feel like I should take a Xanax. I have a very good reputation and a wonderful clientele, but when my grandmother refers her friends, I become a hot mess. The most interesting part is that my grandmother has never come to me to get her hair done. Not that I’m surprised about that.

  I absolutely love doing hair; it’s my passion. Well, it’s one of my passions. My other passion is baking. Many people are shocked when they hear this. About a year ago, I started decorating cookies and somehow started a side cookie business. Looking back, I’m not even sure how it all came about. It started with a few birthday parties and showers, and then it happened, my big break. Several months ago, I was “discovered” at my friend Abby’s birthday party. Which brings us to now; in a few weeks, my cookie creations will be featured in Bev’s Sweet Treats in Beverly Hills. Yes, as in 90210! I still haven’t decided on an official name for this business. Really though, I’m not even sure if it is a business or a hobby or what? I had some business cards made that say Cookies by Madie, but I think I need to get a little more creative and choose an official name. Cookies by Madie sounds really boring and lame, or so I’ve been told.

  All of this excitement and my recent success have definitely pleased my grandmother, which doesn’t happen very often. I have disappointed her a few times throughout my adult life. My decision to drop out of college to go to cosmetology school was the big one. Especially because my overachieving cousins Ellie and Stephy chose “respectable” careers. Those careers being accounting and architecture. My parents tell me that she loves me the same, but I’ve never felt that way. Needless to say, my choice in having my wedding reception at the Four Seasons and my cookies featured in a Beverly Hills bakery brought my status up from pure disappointment to somewhat acceptable. Don’t get me wrong, I know she loves me, but I think she loves my cousins a little more. I know I may sound like a spoiled child, but at least I admit I have childhood issues. Isn’t admitting it a step in the right direction or half the battle or some other old saying that is supposed to be therapeutic?

  Somehow, I manage to beat Mrs. Wilson to the salon with about four minutes to spare. She’s notoriously punctual, so this is a surprise. I run around and grab my supplies to prepare for the next few grueling hours of my life.

  When she arrives, I can see that she’s in a good mood today. She asks all about my wedding plans, which is ridiculous because I know my grandmother has been giving her a play-by-play of every detail. Things get a little awkward when she starts asking me if her son and his wife will be seated at her table. I completely fumble over my words because I’m 100% sure that her son is not on my guest list. The truth is I don’t remember ever meeting her son. I start to panic, so I tell her I will have to “check on that.” If I was to tell her no, then she would call my grandmother and then grandmother would call me. I know she would go on and on about how Mrs. Wilson is one of her greatest friends and how her son fixed Grandmother’s garbage disposal ten years ago, so of course he has to be on the guest list. Hopefully Sienna will come up with a genius plan to get us out of this.

  After I finish with my appointment, I find my phone and dial Cole’s number.

  “Hey, girl,” he answers with a raspy, deep voice. He says he’s trying to channel Ryan Gosling. I love when he does that.

  “Just finished with Mrs. Wilson,” I say as I start to clean up my station.

  “How is my girlfriend Helen?” he says sarcastically. Mrs. Wilson loves Cole. She says he reminds her of an old boyf
riend she had many years ago. She always links her arms in his and giggles every time she’s around him.

  “She was in a good mood, but I’m sorry to tell you that she didn’t ask about you at all. Maybe she’s over you,” I say sarcastically.

  “What? I seriously doubt that,” he says with a laugh. “Hmmmm, I guess I will just have to marry you,” he adds.

  I smile to myself. I’m so in love with this man; he makes me happier than I ever thought I could be. Even when I’m mad at him, he still has some kind of magical power that makes me forget why I was ever mad. After I hang up, I start to reminisce about when we met. It was a little over two years ago. The truth is at first he annoyed me to no end, so annoying that every time I was around him I wanted to punch him. He was always sarcastic and never seemed to take anything seriously. Now looking back, those are some of the qualities that I love the most. His passion for life is one of the things that made me fall in love with him. He has such a positive energy, and he is one of those people that can make friends everywhere he goes. I wish I had his warmth and openness.

  Looking back at my dating history, there were times I thought I would never find someone so amazing. I think it’s safe to say that I had some of the absolute worst dating experiences ever. One day I woke up and realized that I was just wasting time. I pulled myself together and went after my dreams. Not long after, Cole came along and the rest is history.

  Cole comes from a strong and loving family, but he’s definitely the wild one in the bunch. His mother, Susan, is your typical perfect wife and mother. I usually feel completely inferior around her--not because she purposely makes me feel this way, but because I’m the woman who is taking her baby boy away. She’s also a member of several women’s clubs in the community, she hosts tons of fabulous dinner parties, and she wears pearls while cleaning.

  Cole’s father is usually very quiet and lets Susan dominate their lives. I think he likes it that way though. They are very educated and conservative, and I don’t think they were pleased with Cole’s decision to become a professional comedian. But they support him nonetheless. Susan and the rest of his family have always been so nice and welcoming to me, they’ve become a second family since my parents moved out of state. I’m an only child, and the only family that lives nearby is my grandmother and my two cousins whom I’m not close to at all.

  Speaking of my grandmother, she’s left me several messages and we keep missing each other. She loves to keep tabs on our wedding plans to ensure that we are planning a proper event. Her heart is in the right place, or so it seems, but she is definitely “old school.” She demanded that I take a class on proper dinner etiquette-- the kind with the correct silverware and where to put your pinky finger while drinking tea. I totally lied and told her I did. I know that’s bad, but I figured I could go on YouTube and learn all of that nonsense in case she tries to quiz me, and knowing my grandmother, she will.

  After work, I join Cole at the club for dinner and his show. When I finally get home, Sienna is already asleep. Our apartment is in a constant state of disarray as we are both cleaning out all of our junk and packing to move. Well, really all of my junk because Sienna doesn’t have any junk. She would be considered an anti-hoarder. I don’t know if there is a show about anti-hoarders, but if there ever were, she could easily be the star. This move has been a hard transition for both of us because we have been roommates for years and friends for even longer. Right around the time of my engagement, Sienna went through a really horrible breakup. At that time, everything seemed to be changing at once. Things were especially hard for us because I didn’t like her boyfriend, and I was vocal about it. Since then, she’s in a great place and has found a beautiful new apartment that will be close to both me and our friend Abby.

  Abby is our other best friend. She just had a beautiful baby boy named Ace Matthew. Abby was definitely born to be a mom; she’s also a teacher and the first of our friends to have a baby. Abby is always the one who takes care of everybody; she’s understanding, nurturing, and patient.

  When I go into my room, I find a note along with a list from Sienna on top of my mess. I’m a little surprised she didn’t attempt to clean up in here. I admit it’s bad, probably worse than ever. I sit down and read her list. She has been on me to pick out centerpieces and make choices for the caterers. After months of asking, and now begging, I still can’t decide what I want to do. I made the mistake of going on Pinterest, and now I keep changing my mind. Since the wedding is in October, I chose warm colors: plum, gold, and burgundy. I also picked out my wedding gown pretty quickly too. It was the third gown I tried on. I thought that was the most important decision I had to make, but I know that’s not enough for her.

  I look around my room and let out a huge sigh. OK, I have a lot of stuff. I didn’t realize how much I had till I attempted to clean out my closet. I really, really hate throwing things away. Seriously, you never know when I might need that Eminem T-shirt or those Rollerblades that were only used twice. How could I give those away? I spent good money on all this stuff; if I were to get rid of it, I might as well throw hard-earned money into a fire.

  Much to my dismay, I start to go through a few piles of clothes. I decide to give away two pairs of pants and three shirts. This is so huge for me that I consider waking up Sienna to tell her the good news. Probably not the best move.

  Instead, I fall asleep with my makeup on again, and when I wake up, my eyelashes are stuck together from my mascara. I have a full day of clients, so I quickly get ready. I’m about to leave when my phone rings and I see my grandmother is calling. I contemplate letting it go to voice mail, which is silly because she will keep calling until I finally answer. Here goes nothing—

  “Hi, Grandmother,” I answer cheerfully. “How are you?”

  “Hello, dear. I wanted to let you know that Helen said that you did a wonderful job with her permanent.”

  “Oh good. I’m so glad.” I punch the air in excitement and let out a sigh of relief. Even though I absolutely hate when she calls it a “permanent.” I consider correcting her but why bother because no matter what she will continue to call it a permanent.

  “The other reason I’m calling is because I spoke with Ellenor, and she mentioned that you had not called her or Stephanie regarding the bridesmaid gowns. When were you planning on doing this?”

  I must be hearing things because I’m not sure what she is talking about. Does she think that my cousins are supposed to be a part of my wedding?

  “What do you mean? Why would I talk to them about that?” I reply nervously.

  “Madison, surely you aren’t waiting until the last minute to pick out the gowns?” she insists.

  “Grandmother, Cole and I are having very small wedding party. Sienna and Abby each chose their own dress. I told you this.” I remind her.

  “Madison Grace Wales, are you telling me that you’re not planning to ask your cousins to be a part of the biggest day of your life?” she asks sharply. “I think that your friends are lovely girls, but they’re not blood relatives. The girls would be devastated if you didn’t include them.” She continues on with her tirade and I start to tune her out. I even mention that Cole has only asked his brother and his friend Jeff to be groomsmen. After listening to her carry on for a good ten minutes, I finally tell her that I will think about it and discuss it with Cole. That seems to appease her for now, but I know this is not over. Not even close.

  When I hang up, I’m frustrated. There is no way I want to have my cousins as bridesmaids. We played together when we were little, but as we got older, they were never nice to me. It was always the two of them ganging up on me any chance they could. My mom would always tell me just to ignore them and that they were jealous of me, blah, blah, blah. Honesty, I never understood why because they always had each other. They actually remind me of the stepsisters from Cinderella except not as viscous. However, I don’t intend to let them anywhere near my wedding gown, just in case.

  We hardly have an
y contact now, other than family dinners or holidays. We’re Facebook friends but that’s only out of family obligation. Ellie never officially congratulated me on my engagement, which doesn’t surprise me. She’s the meaner one of the two for sure. Stephy said congrats, but she tends to do whatever Ellie tells her to do. I decide to call Sienna to tell her about the conversation because I know she will know how I need to handle this

  “Are you kidding me?” she shrieks. “You can’t have Drisella and Anastasia in the wedding.” I laugh because there have been countless times when they have taken on those names, usually after they started trouble for me and got my grandmother all riled up.

  “I know, but you know how my grandmother can be,” I say sadly.

  “Madie, you can’t let her bully you. This is your day,” she insists.

  “Yes, I know,” I agree. “Anyway, on a more positive note, I looked through some stuff last night, and I’m giving away two pairs of pants and three shirts. Aren’t you proud of me?” I say excitedly.

  “That’s great, but,” she hesitates, “I was in your room last night. Are you sure that’s all you want to give away?” she says sarcastically. “There are things in there you haven’t worn in years, not to mention that horrible Eminem shirt.” I knew it! She always hated that shirt. I’m sure it was giving her a major anxiety attack not to get rid of it.

  “Hello? Have you not heard anything I’ve said? I have more pressing issues to take care of. We have to figure out how to handle my grandmother before I worry about anything else.” I say, trying to change the subject. “I promise I will get around to it. In the meantime, because you’re my wedding planner, maybe you can call my grandmother and talk some sense into her?” I beg.

  “Ohhh.” She stops. “I don’t think that’s in my job description.”

  “I know, but maybe you can talk to her from a professional angle. You always know the right things to say,” I plead.