Spring Into Love

by Chantel Rhondeau

  A form shifted on the chair in the corner. “I sent them home to rest for a while.”

  “Sydney? I thought I dreamed you were here.”

  “Nope.” Sydney crossed the room, taking the seat nearer to Larissa’s bed. “Mom and Dad send their love and said to hurry and get well. Your job is waiting whenever you get back on the island.”

  “That’s nice.” The longer she was awake, the worse the pain was getting. She wondered if a nurse would be along anytime soon with drugs. “Tell them thanks.”

  “Parker said to tell you that you’re still the sexiest masseuse he’s ever seen and he wants to dance with you again at the next party. Shane says that before you come home, send him a request for your favorite foods and we’ll have a huge celebration dinner.”

  Larissa nodded, wondering if she would get a blow-by-blow on what each sibling said. There was only one she cared about. Considering that Sydney switched right to the younger brother’s, Larissa guessed Quinn hadn’t sent a message.

  “Brad also says to get well fast.” Sydney seemed oblivious to Larissa’s lack of interest.

  “Tell them all thank you from me. I don’t know how long I will be gone. The chemotherapy is scheduled to last a few months. Hopefully I’ll be back before the end of the slow season.”

  At least she would spend Christmas with her parents. That was one bright side to all this. Even if it meant she’d be without Quinn.

  Sydney tipped her head to the side and narrowed her eyes. “You’re really not even going to ask about him?”

  A pain different from the surgical wounds ripped through her body. That ache was becoming all too familiar. “I assumed if Quinn had sent a message, you would have told me. Did Project Green go through okay?”

  “Yes, actually it did, even if Quinn was utterly destroyed all throughout the negotiations.”

  Tears welled in Larissa’s eyes, as they did so easily these days, but she wouldn’t let Sydney make her feel guilty. She’d spent enough time feeling that way, and yet Quinn still hadn’t called. “I’m glad everything went well,” she said instead of defending herself for leaving. “I appreciate you coming by Sydney, but you really don’t have to stay. I know you’re probably busy with your charity obligations. Tell the family I said thanks for all the well wishes. When I’m better, I’ll have some decisions to make.”

  Sydney’s mouth turned down at the corners. “What does that mean? You’re thinking about not coming back to the island? What changed in the past two seconds?”

  He didn’t even send a message with his sister wishing her well. Sydney might say he was destroyed while they made the Project Green deal, but he wasn’t destroyed enough to tell his family to handle the deal themselves and come after Larissa. He wasn’t destroyed enough to pick up a phone and see if she was okay.

  “Everything, Sydney. Everything changed.”

  Sydney stood abruptly, blinking rapidly and looking like she was fighting tears of her own. “If you don’t love my brother, I wish you’d call and tell him. I can’t stand him so sad. You’re breaking his heart, Larissa.” She pointed at the wall where she had been sitting before. “Whenever you feel up to it, there’s something over there for you. I was supposed to wait and see your reaction, but it’s obvious you don’t want me here.”

  As Sydney headed for the doorway, pangs of guilt pierced Larissa again despite her best attempts to stave them off. She really liked Sydney, and understood the woman was protecting her brother, not trying to be mean to her.

  “Syd, wait.”

  The younger woman turned at the doorway. “What?”

  “Don’t worry. Of course I’m coming back. Your father has been way too good to me. I won’t leave him in the lurch like that.”

  The other woman turned slightly, looking at Larissa over her shoulder. “I’m glad you’re worried about my father, but it’s my brother who needs you to speak to him right now.”

  Larissa shook her head. “I can’t call him. My heart is broken too, because of how much I love him. All I want is to see him, but I can’t have him end things with me over the phone. I can’t take that.”

  “How do you know he will?” Sydney sighed loudly and pushed a hand through her hair. “You’re both idiots. You know that?”

  Larissa laughed bitterly. “That about sums us up.”

  “I’ll send a nurse to check on you,” she said instead of responding to that directly. “I wish you a speedy recovery. I hope someday you and Quinn grow up.”

  The sound of her clicking heels faded and Larissa sat in the semi-darkness, thinking about what she said. If Sydney was right, Quinn did love her, but that didn’t really matter. Larissa needed more than words. She needed him present and a part of her life, and Quinn loved the resort too much. He’d never give that up for her. Heck, he couldn’t even compromise and share time.

  She didn’t mind work taking up a lot of his time, but at this point she wasn’t even his second priority. She was his very last. Despite how much she loved him, Larissa couldn’t live like that.

  A few moments later, a nurse walked into the room wheeling a cart. She turned on half of the overhead lights and gave a sunny smile. “How are we feeling, Miss Benner?”

  “Ready for some drugs,” Larissa replied.

  The nurse chuckled. “That good, huh? Lucky for you, I have them right here along with some clear broth.”

  Larissa looked over to the corner chair, noting the thin package wrapped in brown paper leaned against the wall. “That woman who left here put a package over there. Can you get it for me?”

  The nurse set Larissa’s dinner and pills on her bedside table and crossed the room, picking up the present. She returned to the bed, pushing the button to raise Larissa’s head higher before placing the package across her lap.

  “Don’t overdo it with the motion,” the nurse cautioned. “Do you want me to take the paper off?”

  Larissa shook her head, fingering the brown wrapping with trembling fingers. It was obviously a painting, so must be from Quinn. Part of her didn’t want to open it with the nurse standing there, but there was no way she’d be able to move it once she got it unwrapped.

  Carefully, she ripped the paper, revealing the framed painting inside. Unable to stop them, tears sprang back to her eyes and began flowing down her cheeks.

  It was Shadow near the waterfall. Quinn’s self-proclaimed favorite painting that had been stored in the cave. She made the nurse help her turn it over, hoping for a note stuck to the back, but there was nothing.

  What did it mean? He sent her his favorite piece of work, something he loved but had to give up because of his obligations to his family.

  Was he telling her that he had to give her up too, even if he loved her?

  ***

  Quinn sat in his office the next day, going over the invoices for the month. He never heard from Larissa once Sydney gave her the painting, but his father said Larissa was healing well and the surgery went well. Her prognosis for recovery was excellent.

  Quinn was happy about that, but he still didn’t know what to do about being separated from her. He thought for sure she would call once he sent the painting of Shadow—that she would realize how much of his heart she held for him to give her that.

  Not a word. Not even a text message.

  No matter how much he wished things were different, it seemed he’d used his last chance. If he were going to win her back, it would mean some big changes.

  Quinn stood up, leaving the invoices unfinished. He needed to talk to his father.

  Chapter 28

  “Discharge day!” Elaine said on the fourth day after surgery, helping Larissa put her shoes on and then brushing her hair. “I’m proud of how brave you’ve been.”

  “Thanks, Mom. It’s easy to be brave with this kind of great support.”

  Even though Larissa’s father was forced to return to work and couldn’t stay at the hospital all the time during her recovery, Larissa knew both her parents would be around ev
ery step of the way whenever she needed them. It was a comfort she counted on. Her doctor provided her on-line support groups and one local meeting, so she could connect with people going through the same thing. Support was essential to her recovery, and she planned to utilize everything she was given.

  Larissa found the diagnosis easier to handle this time around—easier being a relative term. It was still the worst thing she could imagine, but this time she knew she could beat it, just like she had before.

  Larissa figured losing her breasts would eventually strike her and she’d be sad about it, but so far she was more concerned that the doctor said the planned chemotherapy regimen would likely make her hair fall out. Getting together with others who had been through that or were going through it should help her find acceptance. It was just something to deal with and conquer, not the end of her world.

  At least she didn’t have Jacob in the background, expressing disapproval at anything that might change her cosmetically. Besides, she didn’t need a man to know she was still beautiful. Her parents told her every day, and she believed them. Cancer didn’t define her. This was a bump in the road, and Larissa was determined to get past it. There were many other women out there doing it every day. Larissa would connect with them, lean on their strength, and hopefully offer them strength of her own.

  Once her mom got her loaded in the car, they drove toward her parents’ house. Larissa watched out the window, seeing everyone’s Christmas decorations on their lawns, partially obscured by the fresh coating of snow. It was beautiful, but she missed the beach and tropical weather. As much as she loved being with her parents, she realized Iowa was no longer home.

  “You’re awfully quiet over there,” Elaine said. “You okay?”

  “Just thinking about McCallister’s Paradise.”

  “Do you miss it?”

  “Yes. I miss the island and I miss requests for happy endings.”

  Her mom’s head whipped toward her and she let out a startled laugh. “Happy endings? Like, the oldest profession in the world type happy ending? Why would you miss that?”

  Larissa grinned. Her mom was fairly unshockable, but Larissa hadn’t told her the story of how she and Quinn met. It was a long drive home from the hospital, so no time like the present.

  All through it, her mom made an ongoing commentary about how sweet and trustworthy Quinn seemed and that she understood why Larissa missed him so much. It was nice to have someone agree with her point of view.

  Her feelings for Quinn were something her father didn’t want to accept. After a short argument about the painting of Shadow, and Ray expressing his disapproval of Quinn once again, Larissa hadn’t brought him up again.

  She missed Quinn terribly, but knew Dad was right. Quinn hadn’t even bothered to check in on her these past weeks. Ray wouldn’t be amused by the comical beginning to their relationship anymore than he was by the heartbreaking end of it.

  “Maybe you should call Quinn,” Elaine said once Larissa ended with the story of their fight after her birthday dinner. “It sounds like he loves you. Why would he send that horse picture if he didn’t?”

  Larissa nodded. “I believe he does love me, but he’ll never put me first. I see the way you and Dad are with each other. You’re the most important thing in each other’s worlds, even more important than I am, now that I’m all grown up.”

  “Your father is my rock,” Elaine agreed.

  “So it doesn’t matter if I love Quinn or he loves me. I’m going to focus on my recovery for now and try to move on. I deserve what you and dad have. I won’t settle for less.”

  ***

  Quinn wiped sweaty palms against his slacks, trying to control the panic he felt as he sat in Ray Benner’s living room, waiting to hear whether the man would allow him to stay and see Larissa when she came home from the hospital today.

  Ray had Quinn pinned to his seat, pierced by the man’s unwavering gaze. “How can I trust you with my daughter after you broke her heart so badly? She doesn’t need another man in her life who can’t be trusted while she recovers from her illness.”

  Quinn swallowed hard, hoping he could find the words to explain. “These last few weeks have been the worst of my life. I can’t live without her, sir. I should have been here, even if you did tell me not to contact her.”

  None of the suspicion left Ray’s gaze. “She’s sick, Quinn. She doesn’t need stress in her life. It could set back her recovery.”

  “Which is why I’m here and didn’t just call again. When I heard today was discharge day, I knew I had to come and support her. There is still a lot I can do to help her recovery. Sure, the surgery is over, but she needs support through the chemo treatments and I want to be the one to support her. Please don’t make me leave. I promise not to hurt her. I have to make things right.”

  That didn’t mean he was certain she wouldn’t hurt him, but if Larissa sent him away, Quinn would deal with that. He couldn’t let her go without a fight, even if he was afraid they had missed their chance for a happy ending.

  “Please, sir. She means more to me than my own life. I have to speak with her. I have to prove to her that she is the only thing that matters. I was a fool not to see that sooner.”

  ***

  When they pulled up outside her parents’ house, Larissa was surprised to see her father’s truck in the driveway. “I thought he had to work.”

  Elaine shrugged. “So did I. Maybe his boss agreed to let him come home early. Everyone we know has been worried about you. I know Dad didn’t want to miss your first day home.”

  Larissa carefully undid her seat belt, pulling it from across her chest with significant difficulty from the pain. “I hope Dad doesn’t get into trouble at work. Someday, I’m going to pay you guys back all the money I’ve cost you.”

  Elaine waved her hand through the air. “You’re our child. Taking care of you is what we do.” Her gaze narrowed and she pointed at Larissa’s door. “Don’t get out of the car yet. It might be slick.”

  Before her mother could come around the car to help her, Ray stepped out of the house and hurried down the driveway. He raced to the car and carefully helped Larissa from her seat. “How’s my girl?”

  Larissa sucked in a painful breath, feeling a stretch in her incisions with the unusual movement. When the pain passed some, she hugged him. “Happy to be out of that darned hospital.”

  “I’m glad too. Welcome home.” Her dad seemed happier than he had been since she arrived back in Iowa. He must have been really worried about the surgery.

  She hated causing her parents so much anxiety. “I know I spent Thanksgiving in the hospital, but do you know what I’m thankful for?”

  He shook his head as he led her across the walkway toward the door. “Great doctors?”

  She laughed. “Of course not. They get paid to care for me. You and mom love me no matter what.”

  He opened the door and grinned. “We aren’t the only ones, you know?”

  “What do you mean?”

  He led her across the threshold then dropped her hand, nodding toward the living room. “Go inside, princess.”

  She narrowed her eyes, wondering what he had done, but Ray stood outside the archway, making no move to accompany her.

  Larissa walked through, seeing an easel sitting in the middle of the room with a sheet covering the picture on it.

  Her heart rate increased as she searched the room. Why would an easel be in her living room? She only knew one painter. A painter her heart ached for every minute of every day.

  Quinn stepped through the door that led to the kitchen, and Larissa’s breath caught in her throat. He dressed in a dark business suit with a purple dress shirt. A gray tie that accented his eyes caught her gaze. She looked past his clothes into his face.

  His gaze trapped her with its intensity, just as it always had. There were so many emotions passing behind his gorgeous eyes, and Larissa wasn’t sure what they all meant.

  “I miss you,” he said
, his voice scratchy and cracking. “I need you.”

  Larissa felt her chin tremble, and she looked away. “Why haven’t you called?”

  “I tried but your d—” He shook his head. “No, that’s not why. The truth is, I’m a coward.”

  She glanced back up, surprised by that answer. “I don’t understand.”

  He crossed the room swiftly, grabbing her hand and pressing it against his cheek.

  The dampness on his face surprised Larissa.

  He moved her hand to his mouth, kissing the back of her fingers. “If I ruined my chances with you, I couldn’t bear to hear you say it, so I was too scared to speak with you. I didn’t want to hear that we were over.”

  Unable to stop herself, Larissa stroked her thumb over his smoothly shaven chin. She had missed touching him, missed his arms wrapping around her more than she missed anything else in her entire life. But she had been serious about wanting what her parents had. She wouldn’t settle for less.

  “Quinn, I can’t turn my heart off. I never stopped loving you, but—”

  Quinn’s mouth crashed down on hers and he wrapped his arms around her waist. His tongue was hungry, greedily lapping at her lips.

  As much as Larissa wished she could resist, she was weak. She opened up to him, sucking on his bottom lip and pressing herself closer to him. Even through the pain the movement caused in her chest, she stayed locked in his embrace, wishing it could last forever.

  When he finally ended it, sense returned to her passion-fogged brain.

  She closed her eyes, not wanting to see the happiness shining across his radiant face dim into disappointment.

  “You didn’t let me finished the but,” she said.

  “I-I don’t understand,” he said slowly.

  “I never stopped loving you, but that isn’t enough. I need a man who puts me first.”

  Chapter 29

  Quinn looked at Larissa, letting her words sink in.

  She pulled her hand away and stepped back. “I’m sorry. I really am. I wish things were different.”