Far From Home

by Val Wood

  ‘Tsui.’ Jewel blinked her long lashes. ‘She was a beautiful Chinese lady and lived with Papa.’ She looked wistful. ‘I don’t remember her, but that is what Papa said. I only remember Jed and Larkin and Dolly.’

  ‘And who were they?’ Mrs Newmarch asked.

  Georgiana cleared her throat and interrupted. ‘Jed and Larkin travelled with Edward to California, Mrs Newmarch,’ she said. ‘And Dolly managed Edward’s business. They were good friends,’ she added. ‘Edward was proud to know them. He valued their friendship – and they were with him at the end.’

  Mrs Newmarch put her head down and rubbed her fingers over her eyes. ‘My poor Eddie,’ she murmured. ‘My poor darling Eddie.’

  Jewel, on hearing the familiar name of her father, stepped closer to her grandmother and touched her arm. ‘Don’t cry, Grandmama,’ she whispered. ‘Try to be brave,’ and Mrs Newmarch put her arms around the little girl and wept.

  CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE

  One more person to visit, Georgiana pondered, and then I must decide what to do with my life. And Jewel’s. Mrs Newmarch wanted Jewel to live with Martin and his wife, even though she was concerned about her illegitimacy.

  ‘If she has the name of Newmarch, she will be known in this district and possibly have a finger pointed at her,’ she told Georgiana. ‘But Martin and Grace are known for their philanthropy. Grace has helped many a wretched woman who has a child out of wedlock. I must say,’ she added, ‘that my views have changed considerably since knowing Grace and although, of course, I don’t condone impropriety or infidelity, I do declare that some poor women have many difficulties and some men have much to answer for!’

  Georgiana had raised an eyebrow and a slight smile at Mrs Newmarch’s words. Perhaps women’s expectations were changing, after all, if a matron of Mrs Newmarch’s class and upbringing could alter her opinion.

  She had asked Grace for the address of her friend Ruby, and Grace, without a moment’s hesitation, had given it to her. ‘Visit during a morning,’ she had discreetly advised. ‘Her husband is a toy-maker and chooses his timber mid-morning and visits the bank and so forth, whilst Ruby minds the shop.’

  The toyshop was situated in Manor Street, just off the Land of Green Ginger. Jewel danced and clapped her hands when told the name of the street. ‘It sounds like magic, Aunt Gianna. Will it disappear before we get there?’

  ‘I’m sure it is a magical street, Jewel, for no-one knows how or why it came to be named,’ Georgiana explained. ‘But I’m certain it will still be there.’

  The shop, which was tucked into a corner, was small and had a bow window full of brightly coloured wares. A painted wooden tree was decorated with small toys, a clown hung from the ceiling and twirled his soft body in the breeze drifting in from the open door. A wooden duck bobbed its head up and down into a bowl of water and on a shelf sat wooden dolls with painted faces, dressed in silk and satin gowns and bonnets.

  From the open doorway came the sweet smell of burnt sugar and cinnamon. Jewel, whose eyes had opened wide at the splendour of the window display, licked her lips and asked if they could please go inside to have a further look.

  A bell jangled as they pushed the door wider and stepped in. Arranged around the shop were pieces of wooden furniture, stools and chairs and small tables, just the right size for children. A pretty dark-haired woman came out from an inner door. ‘Good morning, ma’am.’ She smiled pleasantly and bobbed her knee, and said hello to Jewel.

  ‘Have you come to look at our lovely toys?’ she asked Jewel, then, taking another look at her, said, ‘Why – you’re prettier by far than any of our dollies. I haven’t seen you before. Are you a visitor?’

  She had an accent which Georgiana recognized as belonging to the Hull area. So this is Ruby, she thought, and I can see why Edward was so attracted to her. She had a natural vivaciousness which seemed to bubble from within her.

  ‘Yes, we’re visiting relatives,’ Georgiana began, when Jewel broke in. ‘What’s that nice smell?’

  ‘It’s toffee.’ Ruby smiled. ‘Perhaps you would like a piece?’ She offered a tray of sticky golden honeycomb toffee. ‘I make it to draw in my young customers,’ she admitted to Georgiana.

  Jewel took a piece, then, pushing the toffee to the side of her cheek with her tongue, remarked chattily, ‘I’ve got a new grandmama.’

  ‘Then you are very lucky,’ Ruby acknowledged gravely. ‘My little boys don’t have a grandmother of their own, but their friends let them share theirs.’

  ‘I’m about five,’ Jewel told her and idly picked up a wooden box. ‘How old are your little boys?’

  ‘Dan is six and Thomas is nearly five. They’re both at school this morning, otherwise you could have met them.’

  ‘At school?’ Georgiana was delighted to hear of it, for she knew of Ruby’s deprived background.

  Ruby nodded proudly. ‘Dame school just around ’corner. We – that is, Daniel, my husband, and me – want them to get on in life. We want them to have an education.’

  ‘Ruby,’ Georgiana said softly. ‘You won’t know me, but my name is Georgiana Gregory and—’

  ‘Oh!’ Ruby exclaimed. ‘Miss Gregory! I know about you through my friend Grace.’

  ‘Ah!’ Jewel had pressed the box lid and it popped open, revealing a bobbing black-faced toy. ‘Look!’

  ‘Put it down please, Jewel,’ Georgiana said firmly. ‘Don’t touch!’

  ‘It’s all right, Miss Gregory,’ Ruby assured her. ‘The toys here are almost unbreakable.’ She laughed. ‘My husband tests them out on our boys. You went to America, didn’t you?’ she went on. ‘I thought you were so brave to travel alone.’

  ‘I met Edward Newmarch whilst I was in America,’ Georgiana said, and Jewel looked up at his name. ‘He asked me if I would call to see you if ever I came back to England.’

  ‘Grace told me that he’d died,’ Ruby murmured. ‘I’m so very sorry. I’ve often thought of him. He—’ She looked pensive. ‘He saved my life. I admit I was ashamed of what I did, but without him I would have finished up in ’workhouse.’

  She took a handkerchief from her apron pocket and blew her nose. ‘I’m sorry if I upset his wife. I didn’t mean to do that. But in the end I did care for him. Onny, not enough to go with him. I loved Daniel, you see.’

  Georgiana nodded. ‘I think he understood.’ Ruby would never have survived, she thought. Not in the rough and tumble of California or the genteel life of New York. She would have been too vulnerable. I would think that she needs someone to look after her, and now she has a husband and two sons who will do that. ‘Edward sent a last message for you, Ruby,’ she said quietly. ‘He wanted me to tell you that he loved you always.’ She glanced down at Jewel, who was once again amusing herself with the jack-in-the-box. ‘He named his daughter after you. Jewel.’

  ‘Yes?’ The little girl looked up again at the mention of her name. ‘I wish I lived here with all these toys!’

  A tear trickled down Ruby’s face. ‘Where is her mother? Is she – is she an orphan, Miss Gregory? Cos if so, I’d ask Daniel if we could take her. I would, gladly!’

  ‘Yes, she is an orphan, and it seems that everyone wants you, Jewel.’ Georgiana felt a warmth stealing over her at Ruby’s generosity towards her former lover’s child, but also a sensation of melancholy and loneliness.

  Jewel came and took hold of Georgiana’s hand. ‘I’m going to live with Aunt Gianna.’ She leaned against her and looked up at Ruby and spoke in her determined childish treble. ‘Aunt Grace has two little girls and you have two little boys, so you don’t need any more children. Aunt Gianna does, because she doesn’t have anyone else of her own, except for Uncle Wilhelm, and he’s far away in America.’

  Georgiana considered Jewel’s comments as they walked back towards the High Street. Jewel was clutching the jack-in-the-box which Ruby had presented to her, and Georgiana carried gifts for Elizabeth and Clara. She had offered, as Edward had requested she should, to give monetary help t
o Ruby if she should need it. But she had refused the offer.

  ‘Don’t think I’m ungrateful, Miss Gregory,’ she had said. ‘But we manage quite nicely and Daniel wouldn’t take kindly to me taking money from Edward.’

  I’ve fulfilled my duty to everyone, Georgiana thought. To May on behalf of her parents’ benevolence towards me, and Edward to whom I made a promise. But what shall I do now? There was an empty place in her heart now that Lake was gone, though since coming to England his presence was no longer so dominant. He is alive in the mountains and forests, dwelling where his ancestors are, she mused sadly, looking vaguely around her at the bustling town. There is no place for him in city streets or busy towns.

  During the afternoon, Jewel went to the nursery to play with Elizabeth and Clara under the watchful eye of a maid. Martin and Grace were both out and Georgiana sat in a chair by the window of her room and contemplated the life in front of her. She looked down at the narrow street below, which was filled with drays and waggons. The river Hull ran behind these houses and this was a street where shipping merchants lived and worked.

  I can’t stay here, she deliberated. I’m hemmed in by the closeness of the buildings. Grace has lived her life in the confines of the town and feels comfortable within these familiar narrow walls. She got up and paced the room. I have become used to the open spaces of America, but can I take Jewel back there when her family is here? You could leave her, a voice inside her head told her. She is not your child. She will be loved and cared for with her family. You could have your freedom once again.

  ‘No!’ She spoke out loud. ‘I cannot.’ She groaned. What should I do? Wilhelm, if only you were here, you would advise me. She lay down on her bed, but then, still disturbed, got up again. Why am I so distracted? I have always made decisions before. She put her hands to her head as she paced. I miss them all so much. Kitty and the babies. But most of all I miss Wilhelm. He has been my rock, my advisor, my friend.

  The image of Wilhelm with his round dimpled cheeks came swiftly to mind as she recollected their shared conversations, either in her log house or sitting on a bench of an evening, watching the sun go down on the mountains, turning the rippling water of the creek to flame. She thought of their rides together on the long journeys to Philadelphia, and of their animated discussions over the articles which were to be printed in the Star newspaper. But most of all she thought of his warm and caring presence when he comforted her after Lake’s death. I was so comfortable in his company, she remembered. So sheltered and at ease. She swallowed hard. And now I am so alone.

  ‘Georgiana! Come in, do.’ Martin beckoned to her from within the open door of his library a few days later as she came down the stairs. He was working at his desk in his shirtsleeves, which he rolled up his arms. ‘You are unhappy. Grace and I have both noticed it. Is there anything we can do?’

  Grace had taken the three children out into the town with the vague promise that they just might pass by the shop in the Land of Green Ginger.

  Georgiana shook her head. ‘Just a trace of melancholia, Martin. It will pass.’

  ‘Do you want to go back to America?’ His eyes were kind, not unlike Wilhelm’s, she thought. In fact, she pondered, they are very similar in nature. I used to think that Martin was very conventional and sober, without any fire, but I was so wrong.

  ‘I don’t know what I want,’ she admitted. ‘I think I am lost.’

  ‘Would you like to talk about it?’

  Her eyes brimmed. ‘Perhaps I would. I need a friend to talk to because I have lost my one and only true one.’

  She told him of the impossible love she had had for Lake and of his trapper’s life in the forests. She told him of the tall and handsome Iroquois Indians who had once been forest warriors and hunters. Of their wives, who had equality and their own council of women who made decisions. She spoke of Dekan and Horse who had conducted the ceremony for Lake’s last spiritual journey to join his ancestors. She described Dreumel’s Creek, where a settlement was now growing, and told him of Kitty and Ted, Jason and Ellis, of Pike’s death, and Isaac and Nellie O’Neil. And finally of Wilhelm.

  Martin had not interrupted her with questions and as she finished speaking he shook his head in wonder. ‘Such rich memories you have gathered, Georgiana,’ he said softly. ‘How favoured you have been to see so much of another country, to gather such knowledge and to make so many friends.’

  He leaned towards her and hesitated as if choosing his words carefully before speaking. ‘I’m so sorry that you have lost the man you loved. But I can only say, in the words of Tennyson, when you sorrow most, ‘‘ ’Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.’’ ’

  Georgiana bowed her head and nodded. ‘Yes, that I know, and I will forever hold Lake dear in my memory.’ She lifted her head and gazed at him. ‘But when I said I had lost my one and only true friend,’ her voice dropped to a whisper, ‘I meant Wilhelm.’

  CHAPTER FORTY-SIX

  Two weeks later Georgiana had almost made up her mind to return to America with Jewel, but then she would hear Jewel’s excited shrieks as she played with her cousins, and wonder if it was fair to take her away from them.

  ‘You must not let us hold you here, Georgiana.’ Grace, in her gentle way, was concerned about them both. ‘Jewel will have a good life with you if you return to America, and she will make other friends.’

  ‘It is so difficult to know what to do for the best,’ Georgiana confessed. ‘I enjoy your company, Grace. It is such a pleasure for me to know you and Martin again. I’m sorry that I’m so downcast.’

  ‘We’ve all changed, haven’t we?’ Grace said. ‘You were always so sure and confident and I was such a poor hapless creature. But your good spirits will return,’ she added kindly.

  And now you are the one who is positive and I am so wretched, Georgiana brooded. Only not for the same reasons. Grace has come up through the misery of poverty to become what she now is. I should be grateful for what I have. And indeed I am, but I’m still miserable and feel so alone!

  The following evening the doorbell rang and the clock struck six as the three of them were finishing supper. They heard the maid’s footsteps in the hall as she went to the front door. ‘Are you expecting anyone this evening, Grace?’ Martin asked.

  She said that she was not unless her father or mother had chosen to call. The maid tapped and announced, ‘A gentleman to speak to you, Mr Newmarch.’

  ‘Will you excuse me?’ Martin pushed back his chair. ‘Please do start coffee without me.’

  They heard the murmur of voices in the hall and Grace poured the coffee and remarked, ‘We quite often get callers. Martin’s business associates visit and people know that they can come here if they are in trouble or need.’

  ‘I do admire you, Grace,’ Georgiana said. ‘I must seem very selfish to you. I do nothing for other people, only for myself.’

  ‘Look at what you have done for Jewel,’ Grace argued. ‘And what’s more, you’ve made great strides for women. You’ve shown that women can be independent. That they can travel alone, even across another continent, and make decisions for themselves too! You should be proud of that, coming as you did from a sheltered background.’

  She paused and considered. ‘Can you imagine your cousin May travelling thousands of miles as you have done? She’s been sitting at home all these years bemoaning the fact that her husband had gone off and left her, instead of making a fresh life for herself!’

  ‘Grace!’ The door opened and Martin stood there. ‘I’m sorry to interrupt.’ His eyes looked merry. ‘Could you come for a moment?’

  Grace rose to her feet. ‘Is there someone in trouble?’ she enquired.

  ‘Possibly,’ he conceded. ‘But it can be resolved.’

  Georgiana sipped her coffee as she waited for them to return. I will stay, she determined. I’ll find something to do here as I did once before. There will be some worthwhile campaign. And Jewel will grow up with her family. It isn�
�t fair to take her away from them.

  The door opened. ‘I’ve come to a decision,’ she stated without turning around. ‘At least – I think I have made up my mind.’

  ‘Without consulting me?’ a man’s voice asked and she whirled around, almost spilling her coffee.

  ‘Wilhelm! Wilhelm!’ She put down her cup and jumped up from her chair. ‘Oh, my dear, dear Wilhelm.’ She put out her hands to receive him. ‘Whatever are you doing here? How did you find me? You can’t have received my letter?’

  ‘No.’ His face was wreathed in smiles as he bent to kiss her hand and then her cheek. ‘I did not. I – I left America in rather a hurry – not long after you, in fact.’

  ‘Really?’ She drew him towards an easy chair and offered him coffee, finding that her hand was shaking as she poured.

  ‘Yes.’ He stretched his hands out to the fire and then rubbed them briskly together. Though the weather was pleasant, it had been a lovely day, she thought that perhaps he was cold, being unused to the cooler air of northern England.

  ‘I, erm, I had some business to attend to,’ he said, ‘and – and, and I was advised by someone whom I trust implicitly to sail for England immediately.’ He spoke quickly and rather nervously, which wasn’t like him. He was usually so measured and controlled.

  ‘It is good to see you, Wilhelm,’ she said softly. ‘I have been thinking of you so often.’

  His face brightened. ‘Oh?’

  ‘Yes.’ She gave a little sigh. ‘I need your advice. I can trust your judgement and your impartiality. But tell me first how you found me here.’

  He gazed at her for a second, then gave a small shrug. ‘I simply got on a train in Liverpool, and when I got off in Hull I enquired where I could find the Newmarch family. I asked a gentleman at the station. He seemed to be the kind of person who might know who was who. But he said he was a stranger to the town and had just arrived on the train, as I had.’