Love's Deadly Masquerade

by The Author- Yani

  Eric was gentle and passionate with her so much so that Vanessa thought she would cry. She had never felt such ecstasy before in her life. When it was over, she clung to him shaking as they looked at each other. If she had not been sure before that night, she was absolutely positive at that moment that she was in love with him and there was no doubting it.

  Eric kissed her again as he looked in her eyes. “I love you, V-Dot.” He laid next to her, pulling her close as he wrapped his arms around her.

  “I love you, too,” Vanessa replied as she snuggled close to him before falling asleep.

  3

  Vanessa wiped her eyes as she reminisced on the night her and Eric first made love. And as usual, she couldn’t help but to wonder how someone who had been so tender, loving and kind to her, could turn into such a monster. She slowly got up and winced before grabbing her side. She took a slow, deep breath, praying that her ribs weren’t fractured again. The excuses of falling down the steps were getting tired and she had already used that excuse twice at Einstein Hospital, Chestnut Hill Hospital, Abington Memorial Hospital and Temple University. They were eventually going to either figure she was very clumsy or was lying her ass off.

  After a moment or so, Vanessa slowly made her way downstairs to the kitchen and put the tea kettle on the stove to make herself some chamomile tea. She sat down at the counter and laid her head down, closing her eyes. She felt weak physically and mentally, though she was positive that was not always the case with her. Vanessa could recall conversations that she had in her high-school classes with other students about domestic violence and the stand that she took on it. She believed a woman who stayed with a man who beat her was dumb as hell and no amount of fear in this world would cause her to stay in a situation that was harmful to her. And now look at the irony. She couldn’t help but wonder if God was punishing her or making her see first-hand that her viewpoint on domestic violence was incorrect. Fear can be overpowering, and sometimes no amount of strength can get a woman to see the light when she is in this kind of trouble. It’s easy to say what you’ll do in a situation when you’re not actually in that situation. And now Vanessa found herself in this situation and didn’t know what to do to get herself out of it.

  That passing thought made her reflect on the day that Eric hit her for the first time.

  The brokerage firm that he worked for was having a Black Tie party and Eric wanted to take her with him so she could meet some of his partners and friends. He convinced her to wear a black Diane Von Furstenburg dress that was form fitting and low-cut in the back. The dress was long with a slight flare at the bottom. She wore a pair of open toe, strappy four inch heels, and carried a clutch handbag. Eric walked into the gala like a proud man with his beautiful woman on his arm. But they hardly spent any of the evening together. Eric was mostly with his partners talking business and left Vanessa alone for primarily the entire night. After feeling stupid while standing in a corner watching everyone mingle, and losing sight of which way Eric went, she went over to the bar and ordered herself a glass of champagne. She was sipping it and casually bopping her head to an old P. Diddy song playing when a gentleman sat down next to her and ordered himself a drink as well. Vanessa vaguely paid him any mind as she wished Eric would come back from wherever he was so they could either dance together or go home.

  “How are you doing?” the man asked her in a friendly voice.

  “Oh, hello,” Vanessa smiled. “I’m doing pretty good tonight, and yourself?”

  “I’m well, thank you. Nice party. Could have done better with the DJ, though,” the friendly man chuckled.

  Vanessa swallowed her drink back almost choking on it as she tried to suppress her giggle.

  “I’m Antoine, by the way,” the friendly man said as he extended his hand to shake hers.

  “Vanessa,” she replied with a smile and shaking his hand.

  “So Vanessa, are you with one of the firms here?”

  “Oh, no. I’m just a guest. I’m here with my boyfriend, but he seems to have disappeared on me. I guess he’s drumming up some more business so I’m not too upset.”

  “Ahh… the beautiful ones are always taken. What a shame,” Antoine said before drinking from his wine glass. “Well, shame on him for leaving a pretty lady alone in a room where the wolves could descend at any moment.”

  Vanessa chuckled. “I’m a big girl, I can take care of myself.”

  Antoine smiled. “I don’t doubt that for one second.” He finished his drink and extended his hand to be shaken again. When Vanessa went to shake it, he brought it up to his lips and kissed it briefly. “It was a pleasure meeting you Ms. Vanessa. Enjoy the rest of the party.”

  “The pleasure’s all mine,” Vanessa smiled. She was still smiling as Antoine walked away. She checked him out a little longer before turning back to the bar to finish her drink. She never saw Eric approaching from the direction Antoine was headed in.

  “See something you liked?” Eric asked from behind her.

  Vanessa turned towards him and smiled. “Hey, babe.” She stood up to kiss him on the cheek but the look in his eyes made her feel as though something was wrong. “Did everything go okay with your co-workers?”

  “Everything was fine. Are you ready to go?” Eric asked flatly.

  “Yes, sure if you’re ready, I’m ready.” Vanessa stood up and Eric sat a twenty on the bar for the bartender. He instructed him to keep the change and he and Vanessa waited for the valet to bring his car around.

  The silence felt awkward to Vanessa so she cleared her throat. “Is everything okay?” she asked.

  “I don’t know, you tell me,” Eric replied as he looked at her.

  “What’s do you mean?”

  “Who was the dude at the bar?”

  “Oh, Antoine? He was just a guy that was buying a drink and he asked if I was enjoying the party. I told him I was here with my boyfriend and was having a pretty good time. He cracked a joke about how they could have hired a better DJ and when he finished his drink, he told me to enjoy the party and left,” Vanessa explained wondering why Eric would let that bother him.

  Eric laughed sarcastically as the valet handed him the keys to his Infiniti. “Antoine. You on a first name basis with these niggas now?”

  “Eric, why are you getting bent out of shape over a friendly guy who was buying a drink near me and was just being cordial.”

  “I ain’t bent out of shape over no nigga being cordial. That nigga wasn’t being cordial. He kissing your hand and you smiling at him, checking the nigga out while he’s damn near across the fucking room. I’m not bent out of shape, try fucking annoyed,” Eric snapped.

  “First off, you need to stop cursing at me, Eric. I’m not talking to you like that so don’t talk to me like that,” Vanessa replied becoming upset.

  “What? I’ll talk to you any fucking way I want. Fuck wrong with you.”

  “Whatever, Eric. I don’t know what your problem is tonight but like I said, don’t talk to me like that. Getting mad over a guy kissing my hand is so petty. It’s not even that deep.”

  “I’m petty? I’m being petty, now? You’re calling me petty? I leave you alone for five minutes and you in the party acting like a hoe.”

  “Acting like a what?!” Vanessa repeated looking at Eric as though he had lost his mind. When Eric stopped at a light, she opened the car door to get out. Eric snatched her by her arm and pulled her back to her seat. “Get off of me!” Vanessa yelled at him as she yanked away.

  “Close the damn door, where the hell do you think you’re going and I’m talking to you? Close the fucking door, NOW!”

  The look on Eric’s face slightly frightened Vanessa. The light turned from red to green and the cars behind them began to honk. Vanessa slammed the car door shut and folded her arms across her chest.

  “I know you better not slam my fucking door again,” Eric practically growled. He continued to snap at her about Antoine from the party for the duration of the ride home. When he
parked in the driveway, Vanessa got out of the car and slammed the door again. She marched over to the front door and used her key to unlock it. No sooner than she made it to the living room, Eric snatched her by her arm and spun her around before slapping her in her face. Vanessa cried out and stumbled back in her heels almost falling. She put a hand to her face feeling the sting from his slap and looked at him with tears in her eyes. When she got over the shock of him slapping her, she cocked her fist back and swung back at him but Eric blocked it.

  “Bitch!” Eric barked. He punched Vanessa in her face, knocking her to the floor. Before Vanessa had a chance to brace herself, he was on top of her. “Bitch, I will break your fucking neck in here, swinging on me like you’re tough!” Vanessa struggled to fight back, screaming for him to get off of her, but that only infuriated him some more. He put his hand around her throat and squeezed. Her legs kicked beneath him trying desperately to kick him in the groin.

  “Oh bitch, I see you have to learn the hard-way,” Eric said as he snatched Vanessa by her hair and dragged her from the living room to the stairs. Her arms and legs flared as she screamed and begged for him to stop, but her cries fell on deaf ears. As Eric tried to drag her up the stairs, she clung to the banister. He used his fist to beat on her knuckles to make her let go. He then yanked her away, and dragged her up the stairs. He stopped momentarily between steps to slap her in the face again. When they got to the bedroom, Vanessa tried to scramble to her feet but Eric punched her in her back and in her ribs, knocking the wind out of her. He then grabbed her by the neck again, lifting her in the air and throwing her to the floor.

  “You better not ever fucking disrespect me like that again! Ever! You hear me!” he yelled before kicking her like a dog.

  Vanessa curled up in a ball with her arms covering her head and her face to protect herself from any other punches or slaps he may have delivered. She cried and sobbed as she peeked from behind her arms to see where he was.

  “Shut the fuck up,” Eric said calmly before walking out of the room. Vanessa listened for his footsteps and heard him when he walked down to the kitchen. She laid on the floor a little longer, struggling to catch her breath while wondering what the hell had just happened. Who was the monster impersonating the man she slept with almost every night and had loved more than anything in the world? When she felt like she could move, she sat up slowly and placed her hands to her head as she felt dizzy and nauseous. She crawled hurriedly to the bathroom and lift the toilet seat up, vomiting everything she ate and drank that evening. She rest her head against the cold porcelain bowl and began to sob. Vanessa stopped when she thought she heard Eric coming back upstairs. She quickly shut the bathroom door and locked it.

  “V-dot, open the door,” Eric said as he twisted the door knob. His voice sounded much calmer than it did five minutes before.

  “No!” Vanessa said back as she choked on her sobs.

  “Vanessa, please. Let me in. I just want to talk, babe.”

  “Talk? With what, your fists? I think you’ve said enough.”

  Eric placed his hand on the door and leaned on it. “I’m sorry, babe. I don’t know what came over me. Just please, let me in so I can make sure you’re okay. Let me make this right, please. I never meant to hurt you, I swear. I’ll never put my hands on you again, I promise. Please, open the door so we can fix this. Please, Vanessa. I love you.”

  Vanessa closed her eyes and listened to him. Though she loved him, she was terrified of him at that moment. She began to think that maybe she did gawk at Antoine as he walked away a little longer than she should have. She knew she wouldn’t have appreciated it if she caught Eric kissing another woman’s hand and then gazing at her body as she walked away. “But he still shouldn’t have hit me,” she thought to herself. She then thought that maybe she should hear him out. “If you listen to the bullshit he’s about to spew when you open that door, you are a fool. Once a beater, always a beater! Trust me.” a little voice said in her head. She silenced it as she slowly unlocked the door and opened it. She was shocked to see Eric with tears cascading down his face.

  He looked at her and winced. “Aw damn baby… I…” he shook his head unable to find the words. “I can’t believe I did this to you. I swear, I’ve never done anything like this before. I swear, I’ve never, ever hit a woman before. My mother raised me better than this. I have sisters and would break a muthafucka up if I ever heard they had done something like this to them.” He reached his hand out to her face to wipe her tears away and Vanessa flinched and moved away from his hand.

  “How could you do this to me, Eric? I didn’t do anything! I thought you loved me,” Vanessa cried.

  “Vanessa, I do love you. I guess I was more stressed over the party tonight than anything else. Not with you or Antoine, just some things that happened with the discussion I was having with some of the guys we were trying to do business with. Some of the senior partners were spitting my ideas like they were their own and was shutting me outta things. I took it out on you. I shouldn’t have done that.” Eric hung his head in shame and put his hands to his face. “I fucked up, babe. I fucked up bad and if you wanna leave, I guess I don’t have a choice but to respect that and let you go…”

  Vanessa stared at him for a moment, her heart aching. The better part of her knew she should run and never look back. But too much of her loved him. Vanessa loved him hard. He was her first love and the only man she had ever loved or been in love with. She understood that no relationship is perfect and felt that they could get through this with a little counseling and maybe even praying together.

  She reached for his hand and held onto it. Eric grabbed it and fell to his knees in front of her. He buried his face in her abdomen and cried like a baby.

  “I promise we’ll fix this. I love you more than anything, Vanessa. I’ve never loved a woman the way I love you. You mean everything to me and I swear I’ll never fuck up like that again. I promise you.”

  Vanessa was speechless as she stroked the back of his head. She promised herself at that moment that if he was willing to work with her, she was willing to forgive him and try to fix their relationship so they could be stronger together.

  “I love you too, baby. But this can’t ever happen again, Eric. I mean it. If it does, I’m gone. Do you understand me?” Vanessa said sternly,

  “It won’t happen again. I swear. It won’t.” Eric stood up and kissed her gently. He then sat her down on the toilet and left the bathroom before returning with her bathrobe and a towel. He turned the tub water on and poured some melon scented bubble bath in the water, running her a hot bubble bath. He then undressed her gently and helped her step into the bathtub. He took his time washing her body, squirting the hot, bubbly water down her back and over her chest, soothing her. Afterwards, he helped her from the tub and gently dried her off before placing her robe on her and carrying her to their bedroom.

  They made love that night as they did on her birthday just two months before. And he held her in his arms like he had held her the very first time and Vanessa began to relax, foolishly believing that things were going to be like they were before that dreadful evening.

  4

  The tea kettle began whistling and Vanessa got up from the counter. As she was fixing herself a mug of hot tea, she heard Eric pulling into the drive-way. If her ribs weren’t so sore, she would have ran back upstairs and got in the bed, pretending to be asleep. Instead, she continued fixing her tea, already knowing what to expect when he came in the door: an apology, possibly some flowers and then the script would flip to how if she had not disrespected him the way that she did, things would not have taken an ugly turn. “How long are you going to let this go on? What is it going to take? A punch that does more than leave a bruise? A kick that does more than leave your ribs sore?” Vanessa shook her head to silence the voice inside of it just as Eric came inside.

  He walked over to her quietly and kissed her on the cheek without saying anything as though nothing happened earl
ier. She kept her mouth closed as well not wanting to say anything that would set him off and cause him to unleash another ass whipping on her. She glanced up and noticed that there were no flowers or apologetic gifts. She stirred the honey and sugar in her mug and then blew softly on it before taking a sip.

  Eric looked through some papers and then sat a stack of mail on the counter before heading over to the stairs. “Are you coming to bed?” he asked.

  “As soon as I finish this tea, I’ll be right up,” Vanessa replied softly. And without responding, Eric went upstairs without her.

  Vanessa sighed and sipped her tea. She wished she had someone she could call and talk to. Because she was an only child, she had no sisters she could cry to and no brothers to protect her. And with the connections that Eric had within the police department and in other places, calling the cops was out of the question. The only person she had in her corner since she was a little girl was Arianna and they barely talked to each other because Eric kept her on such a tight leash. He claimed Arianna ran the streets too much and was an educated hoe. But Vanessa knew what the problem really was. Arianna wasn’t afraid of Eric and made a damn good point to let him know if she said the word, she’d blow his fucking head off and not think twice about it. She had tried to get Vanessa to leave Eric and did not hold her tongue when it came to speaking on her disdain for him.

  Vanessa sipped from her mug once more as she thought back on the big blow up between her, Eric and Arianna. It was after the first time he beat her…

  Vanessa had spent so much time at Eric’s house that it was almost as though she didn’t have a place with Arianna anymore. She still paid her half of the rent, not wanting to leave Arianna hanging, but it had gone from her living at the apartment and spending the night at Eric’s, to her living at Eric’s and spending the night at the apartment.