by Derek Palmer
I shrugged and knocked - and waited.
"Come in."
I opened the door and stepped in, preparing myself for something, maybe for some physical harassment. I closed myself magically as a security measure.
Yet I was totally unprepared to what I saw there. The man sitting behind the desk in his dark robe didn't look that old, but at the same time he seemed ancient - or his dark eyes seemed ancient. Or maybe they seemed ancient because they seemed bottomless and empty at the same time. It was as though his eyes could swallow you - or the inner you - and after that there would be only your empty shell left here in this world. Of course that kind of thing couldn't happen.
"Good day, sir, my name is Stian Holth."
Again, it was like there were different things happening to me at the same time. A part of me looked at him, swallowed uneasily, but then introduced myself. Just like any nervous student would. The other part was watching and keeping an eye what was happening.
""So, you are the famous Stian I have been told about, who helped one of my students, and who would like to work in the library.""
The moment he said that I could feel how the man started to sense me with his magic. It was nothing like the tug-of-war -game that the young Elves sometimes played; No, this was like a quick, full-frontal attack directed at me, without warning and with full force. Without my new skills, I would have been in a serious trouble. Very serious trouble, maybe even deadly serious.
The natural reaction to this would have been to stop him and push back with full force. That was what I would have liked to do. Instead, a part of me reacted in a way that I didn't know was possible. It was like I became magically transparent and his push just went through me like a sea wave goes through the seaweed. Instead of being a rock, I had turned into seaweed. The wave had barely passed me when I found myself saying.
"I'm sorry, Sir, but I don't speak any foreign languages, except a few words of Gaullian that I'd rather not say aloud, here."
There was absolutely no need to pretend to be nervous, since I was nervous. Really, really nervous. Even if I liked to think that I could fight my way out of here, I couldn't be sure about it. Still, a part of me just wanted to run away and not look back.
Another part of me kept on looking at the man behind the desk. First, when he had launched his attack, his face had turned into a scary look and his mouth had partly opened, like he was ready to say or order something. Once his push had passed through me, the look gradually changed and after my response, his looks changed more and, in the end, he looked like an older man in a Magician robe behind a desk. Except that he wasn't just any Magician, he was also a natural Mage, and someone who spoke the Old Language fluently!
Even though he looked much more normal now, I could still almost feel those dark eyes evaluating me. Judging me. I could now easily understand the hesitant look in the eyes of the two guys who brought me here. Myself, I did nothing to hide my uneasiness - totally opposite. No, I just allowed my face to show the worry I was feeling, even if the real reason behind my worry was something I hoped that he had no idea about.
Finally the man nodded. "Too bad, one always hopes to find somebody to practice one's talents with..."
I could barely hide my internal shiver. There was something behind those words that I would not like to figure out, not even if I was quite sure that my magical power might have matched his.
"... but you can very seldom get all that you want. So, you are Stian and you have some interest to work at the library? Why, exactly?"
At that moment I understood that I wasn't the only person in this world who could add some magic to Anglon. Most likely it had been quite stupid to believe that in the first place, but I was also proud of myself, since I was quite sure that I could do it better than he could. There was something harsh in the way he did it, like there had been in his magical pushing. Like there was some internal threshold that he had to overcome and which then affected his use of natural magic.
"I... I already work in order to afford my housing, but that doesn't leave me much, or rather any, money for other purposes. I like books and I think that this might be nice inside work..."
"Of course, the life of a young man..."
That comment was more like a silent statement; it wasn't directed to me and he continued before I was able to decide if I should say anything more.
"... however, the work that needs to be done here may surprise you, since not all of it is clean, and not even all the books are clean. Are you ready to do that?"
At least I had an answer ready for that. "As long as it's inside and doesn't include cleaning of the privies, I'm quite sure that I am. Or climbing the roofs when it's raining."
His laughter was a surprise - just because it made him look and sound like a normal person. Only then did I realize that I was just as abnormal as he was - or maybe even more so, and maybe this wasn't the right time or place think such thoughts.
A moment later the man turned to me again. "Why aren't you interested in becoming one of us, then? That would give you unlimited access to the library and you can be sure that those bastards who can inherit the titles wouldn't dare look down on you anymore."
Again, there was some persuasion but not a real order. Shit. Nothing had prepared me for a situation like this.
"I... I... I'd sure like that, but I can't help it that I'm scared about those things - really scared. Therefore, I can't even think about it. I can respond to physical threats, but..."
It was like something had been turned off inside the man. Like he had suddenly lost all his interest in me; it was alike I was missing some important trait that he valued more than anything.
"I see. Then, working here at the library is probably quite okay. Your friend here has spoken quite highly about you. Rurik, you can probably show Stian out and let the people here know that Stian will working here from now on."
I acted surprised when Rurik came out from behind the veil where he had been hiding. I had been aware of his presence as soon as I had passed the magic push test, but I had been careful not to show it. Once we were on our way towards the manager of this part of the library, Rurik turned to me.
"Too bad that you can't handle this business. With my skills and your physique we would have been quite a pair. But don't worry, Stian, I'll protect you here."
"Thanks, Rurik - and thank you for this."
"That's okay, they're always short of staff down here. You know, very few people pass the Old Man’s questioning. When I think about it, it might have been a good thing that you weren't too eager to become one of us. Besides, maybe working here for a while can make you change your mind."
"Maybe, but at the moment I don't feel like it."
"Trust me, it will pass. It will pass."
Later that day, I had finally some time to think. I had the dark attachment glued to my red University pass and I was following an old library worker who explained to me the finer points of my work, like how to use the broom and the dust pan. Then it occurred to me that most likely my reaction had been absolutely right - for a worker. Had I become a student, I was sure that at some point, I could not have hidden my natural ability to use magic; and by now I had learned enough of the drugs the Magicians used, to be afraid of them. But to be accepted as a worker here, it was better if you didn't hate the Magicians but were afraid of them. Well, I hadn't really been afraid of the Magicians, but of the methods they used. Using that fear had worked well enough.
Finally, I was here, in the protected part of the library. Now I only needed some more patience. My Elven friends would have laughed at that thought.
--
Chapter 25
As 'the Old Man' had warned me, the work at the library wasn't at all glamorous - especially in the beginning. Almost nothing I did had anything to do with the books, except carrying heavy piles of them from one place to another. I wasn't even allowed to touch the books the Magicians had used and left behind. Patience. I was now here where I wanted to be
and I didn't even have a plan how I was going to achieve what I wanted. In fact, I didn't even know exactly what I wanted to do. Patience.
Luckily for me, I had the full support of my 'local' families - that's how I thought about them, my local families - here in Aston, and my real family out there. Sometimes I wondered how I could have believed that I would have been able to do all the things I wanted to do - all alone. Maybe I could have, but it would have taken decades, at least. Somehow I was afraid that we didn't have decades. A decade plus a few years? Just how long did it take to raise and train an army of Trolls? Not much longer.
Via Elise's contacts we learned that some girls had gone missing even before this latest incident, but last spring was probably the first time they had tried it on a larger scale. Of course we had no way of knowing what had happened, or what was happening in other places, in other towns. The limiting factor for them probably was that those Guardians who were truly behind this scheme were stationed here in Aston and, according to Elise, they were also so paranoid that none of those on the top level really wanted to leave Aston. Yes, the incident at the warehouse had really scared them - but that was just about all we knew. Our informants in low places could only get a certain amount of information.
Besides the work at the library, I didn't have much to do, since there was only a limited amount of studies that you could officially do during the summer. Most of the teaching staff couldn't care less about the students during that time, and the ones who cared were usually those who had problems attracting students during the regular terms. However, I noticed there was a group of those who were on the verge of being dropped and kicked out of the University. Some of those people were offered a yellow pass and a secure position within the Church. There were people who took that option instead of returning home with their tails between their legs. In a way, I could understand them.
However, I found a way to use the sudden free time I now had - I had heard about the forest that started somewhere north of the University area and I decided to pay it a visit. When I asked Frode about that, he frowned.
"Stian, please keep in mind that the forest is part of the hunting grounds of the Royals. Even touching something that they can hunt is considered a serious offense."
"They would need to catch me first."
"They often use dogs. Can you handle trained dogs?"
That made me think. While cats seemed to be able to absorb magic around them without any difficulty, I had no real experience with dogs and how they behaved. I knew that most of the dogs followed the scent of the game they were after.
"I have no idea, but most likely I should be able to avoid them. Besides, I'm certain that Mrs. Ness could make an excellent stew from a few rabbits."
"Just be careful."
"I will, but I need to get into the forest at least for a while. It's been almost a year since I was in a real forest."
A real forest. The place I entered early the following morning didn't look like a real forest to me. There were zig-zagging paths and no trace of anything bigger than a few rabbits or squirrels. I was certain that some people from Aston visited this area quite often and captured whatever game they could get. Still, just the scent of fresh leaves instead of the continuous stink of human bodies or waste made me smile. Maybe this wasn't a real forest, but this already felt much better to me than those city streets.
It was past midday when I finally stopped and dared to sense my surroundings without restricting myself. I closed my eyes and breathed out and in again several times. Out and in. The scent of fresh air in my nose was so wonderful that I wanted to laugh aloud. There was also the fact that I could sense the living things around me. I was sure that there were several rabbits, and some other animals that I assumed to be foxes. There was even a small herd of deer north of my position; not to mention a flock of people, some horses, and possibly some dogs west of me. I sighed. It seemed that, besides me, some other people had decided to take good use of the nice weather. I guess that I just needed to stay away from them. Still, I couldn't help smiling. It just was so good to be inside a forest.
It was almost difficult to walk back to Aston the next afternoon, and the smell the city made was only part of the problem. The bigger issue was once again the huge number of people, the crowds that forced me to almost turn off my sensing, which had again started to feel quite natural to me. Turning that skill down wasn't really a big problem anymore, I just didn't like to do it.
However, the look on the face of Mrs. Ness almost made all that worthwhile. I guess it had been a while since she last saw three fat rabbits, all nicely cleaned. I was sure that she started humming to herself when she started planning what she could do with them. I almost wished that I could offer her some deer, but that risk probably wasn't worth taking. Besides, I didn't have my crossbow here.
I did a few more trips to the northern forest during the summer. Those short trips were small miracles for my mental state. Even if those visits were short, I felt better for several days afterwards and so it was easy to make a decision to continue those trips in the future.
When the autumn term at the University started, I soon noticed that being able to work on the Dark Floor of the University didn't exactly make you popular among the other students. Those studying to become Magicians were mostly disliked and feared, and sometimes for good reason. They were privileged, sometimes - or quite often - arrogant bastards. The only thing that kept things mostly tolerable was that those wanting to become Magicians were kept busy and they usually moved in their own groups. I soon found out that by working on the Dark Floor, I was considered to be one of them, but that they didn't need to be afraid of me. In a way I didn't care, since my main goal at the University was not to make friends. Still, it hurt somewhat. It might have hurt more if there had been some natural Mages among those people who looked down at me.
One of things that kept me in my senses were the things that I was able to do with Frode, either practicing with Geir or some of his friends, or some mission on which Elise sent us. There weren't many of those missions and we were very careful with them, since we wanted to avoid any extra attention on our family - or the restaurant. There were a few times when I saw Ylva, but besides some quick greetings we both almost avoided each other. I made a note keep an eye on her. I had already asked Elise to keep her safe, if possible. I had made the same request regarding Hakon, the ex-Guardian whom the restaurant family now had working for them in their remote warehouse.
The other thing that helped me stay sane were my visits to the northern forest, even though it didn't really feel the same as the real wilderness close to my old home or even the forests in the Hidden Valley. My sensing ability had become so much better that the closeness of Aston and all the people there was always present if I tried sensing it at all. Still, the fresh air and sensing the wild animals was something I had missed. Even if I didn't really dare to hunt anything larger than rabbits, or pick some berries and mushrooms, I enjoyed those visits.
We were closer to the winter solstice than the autumn equinox when I was once again visiting the forest. There had already been some frost, and that meant that most of the mushrooms were gone, but some yellowfeet chanterelles were still there. I knew that I’d probably need to prepare the first dish myself if I wanted to convince Mrs. Ness to use them as food. However, the soup would be so good that it would be worth the trouble. If we could also have some smoked deer, too... I sighed. You couldn't have everything, here. The soup would still be good, and the rabbits would make a nice stew. I sat down on a log and ate some of the food I was carrying with me and used the peaceful moment to sense my surroundings a bit more.
While turning my attention further north, I suddenly had problems swallowing the bread I had been eating.
During my visits around this large forest I had always done my best to avoid any other visitors, even if I had no idea who they were and what they were doing. Most of the time it had probably been the most sensible thing to do, since the few
times I had sensed others there, they had most likely been a hunting party with their horses and hunting dogs. Since I wasn't quite sure if I'd be able to hide from the dogs, I had avoided all contact with such groups. If I had sensed right, somebody else might not be quite as lucky.
I sighed and re-wrapped the piece of bread I had been eating and concentrated on the scene north of me. To me, it seemed like there were pieces of wood waiting for the first piece to fall. Once that piece fell, the others would follow. Dominoes - that was the name of the game - but that wasn't how the game was actually played. I shook those thoughts away quickly, since I had to decide. Or maybe not. I now knew that it was true what Frode had said. Killing a deer in these northern forests that those Royals considered as their own private hunting ground, was something that was probably punished by killing the hunter while hunting him down.
Although I didn't like the Magicians or the corrupted Guardians, I couldn't really make myself love the Royalty, either. Even if they sometimes took care of widows and orphans. I wondered if they would like to care for those who had become widows or orphans because of poaching. I forced those thoughts to the background when I started running towards the area, wondering what I could do, how I could save the person who was trying to catch a deer.
