Twist of Faith

by Kelly A. Purcell

  2

  My Rib

  Reuben picked up his back pack and dashed down the stairs to the pastor’s office, he tapped twice and entered.

  “Just dropping off the reports for mom,” he said hurriedly, as he dropped the pile of folders onto the already cluttered desk and turned to leave again.

  “Well hold on a moment,” Pastor Roberts called.

  Reuben turned around, and edged toward the desk once more, his fingers fidgeting with his bag strap anxiously. The burly man, with the receding hair line and perceptive eyes, removed his glasses and looked up at him, a knowing smile playing on his lips.

  “Relax boy, she will be waiting for you.”

  Reuben grinned, hiking his bag up on his shoulder, “I know; I just can’t wait. It feels like ages since I’ve last seen her. She’s everything I could have ever wanted Pastor, beautiful, faithful and so talented,” he said dreamily.

  Pastor Roberts nodded, “uh huh, that’s what you keep saying,” he said with a smile.

  “And it’s true. I’ve told you how I’ve prayed for the woman of my dreams, someone I could settle down with, the mother of my children, a supportive partner in the ministry God’s aligned for me,” he explained excitedly, his eyes bright with passion and vision.

  The grey bearded man nodded again, “just don’t do anything foolish. God is a loving God, he provides and blesses his people. But he is also a God of wisdom and timing. Your timing might not be his, your dreams might not be either, just continue to seek him Reuben, and please wait. If she’s the woman you’ve always prayed for she’ll be around in the next couple years. You know, after you finish college and have a means of providing for her?” Reuben grinned, “sure Pas, I get it. I do plan to wait, any other way and my mother would kill me.”

  The Pastor burst out in laughter and waved him off, “get out of here boy.”

  He was sitting in the waiting area, moping over his cellular. He knew her plane had arrived; he’d been sitting there for hours watching people file out of the doors and run toward their loved ones. He’d seen the kissing couples, the swinging couples, the screaming couples, the excited children and the surprised grandparents, tugging at their young firm cheeks, but he couldn’t see her.

  He sighed and looked about him once more, then dialled his friend’s number.

  “Hey man, what you doing calling me for. Take the girl out, spend some quality time together,” came the quirky voice after a couple rings.

  “That’s the thing man, she’s not here.”

  “What you mean she’s not there, her plane landed more than two hours ago...”

  “I’ll call you back Craig, am getting another call.”

  He immediately switched lines, “hello.”

  “Reuben baby,” came the familiar voice, smooth like velvet, soothing like the caring caress he’d missed so much.

  Breaking out into a big excited grin, he took a moment to still his racing heart, “hey, wow I was starting to worry. Where are you?” he asked, looking about him for the familiar figure.

  She sighed deeply into the phone, “I’m still in New York.”

  “What?” he removed the phone from his ear and looked at the screen, then put it back again, all the excitement now gone from his face. He was pink with panic, his brows drawn in a confused frown.

  “How so? You said...”

  “I know what I said, I just... I had some stuff to do.”

  He got up and paced, running his fingers through his short woolly curls. “I just wanted to see you, how could you jerk me around like that? You’re gonna take another flight?”

  There was a nerve wracking pause on the other end, long enough for him to start sweating cold. Suddenly his shirt was too tight and the waiting area was too crowded.

  “Reuben, I have something I need to talk to you about...”

  “Forget that, let’s talk about the matter at hand, when are you going to come? I miss you Lisa, Jeez baby I’ve been looking forward to this for so long.”

  “No Reuben,” her voice was crisp with annoyance, “It’s important that we talk about this now, we have to.”

  As he stood there, holding the phone to his ear, his palms dripping with sweat, his mind blanked out. Not even a prophetic word could prepare him for what he was about to hear, neither could he even begin to imagine it. His faith in her was too strong to be penetrated by anyone other than herself.

  “It’s over Reuben, I can’t do this anymore.”

  Reuben lay in the cold darkness, top less and crying. It was the early hours of the morning. The faint light from the full moon streamed into the bedroom giving everything an ashy, silver hint. The icy wind drifting through the partially opened window, nipped at his naked upper body, but he couldn’t feel it. He couldn’t care about feeling anything other than the pain losing the girl of his dreams rendered, it was like his world had lost all colour, now that she had withdrawn herself from his life.

  He’d gone over it several times, from the first time they met to that last tragic overseas phone call and he still couldn’t figure out what he’d done wrong. Everything about her was perfect, and there was no doubt in his mind that she was the one for him; his future wife, the mother of his babies, his rib. He sighed and turned onto his side, feeling awfully pathetic yet unable to draw himself from this emotional stupor. Her cruel words still echoed in his mind and he couldn’t help wondering how correct she might be, maybe he wasn’t as serious about God as he needed to be, or else this would’ve never happened.

  As though on cue, his phone, resting on his dresser, started to spin and beep incessantly. He turned to his side and sniffed, looking at it in thoughtful dismay. He knew who it was, he knew what it was about and it depressed him even more.

  How was he supposed to go to early morning prayers in this state? He couldn’t think of anyone but her, how sad was it, that he couldn’t even finish dressing without thoughts of her interrupting him. In that same instant he realised how selfish his thoughts were and it bugged him. He’d always been a faithful Christian. He went to church, went to all the relevant and sometimes not so relevant meetings, was faithful in prays and evangelism, and he tried his best each day to grow in his faith and to please God. This led him to think about his current situation again, wasn’t he doing enough? She did say he wasn’t focused enough for her, focused on what? Now he couldn’t help wondering if this wasn’t some test he was being subjected to, maybe God wanted more of him, he knew she sure did.

  He got up and went to the phone, as he picked it up, it stopped vibrating in his hands and 1 missed call flashed across the screen. He sighed and reached for a shirt, just as the door opened and his mother peeped in, still in her night gown and crown of colourful rollers.

  “Ruby?” she stepped in and switched on the lights.

  “I know ma, am almost ready,” he said.

  She came in and leaned against the dresser with a worried frown on her sleep softened face.

  “You alright Reu?”

  Reuben looked up at her, his foot lifted to put on his shoe. He sighed, “I’ll be fine.”

  She nodded without any sign of conviction, “okay. Craig is outside.”

  “What? Why didn’t you tell me that?” he said with a hint of annoyance, jumping up and snatching his bible up from the bed.

  Mrs. Clark smiled at him, “I was about to, but you said you knew.”

  He chuckled and leaned down to peck her on the cheek, “see you later Ma.”

 

  “I should’ve left yuh tail,” Craig grumbled when Reuben climbed into the car.

  “Sorry man.”

  “Just make sure you get your car out of the garage soon, cause I not picking you up no more.”

  Reuben chuckled, “sure, as soon as my dad pays the bill.”

  They drove in silence for a while, until Craig finally built up the courage to broach the subject, Reuben knew he was itching to talk ab
out.

  “So how you holding up?” he asked.

  Reuben shrugged, “I’ll be fine” he muttered, his punch line of the week.

  “Yeah right,” Craig said, in that matter of fact way he had.

  Reuben looked over at him, “I’m not gonna bleed my heart out for everyone that asks man.”

  Craig nodded, “sure, but I not everyone. I’s your boy, you know that.”

  Reuben sighed, “yeah that’s right. I just don’t know what to do about it man, or how to say how I feel or whatever...”

  “Now you making me uncomfortable,” Craig said, as he pulled into the church yard.

  There were only two other vehicles there, and the lights in the church were already on, with people already standing for prayer.

  Craig parked and looked over at Reuben, “you know what you need? You need something to take your mind off Lisa”

  Reuben nodded, “I think you’re right. I was thinking that maybe this is all supposed to happen, that maybe I was a little too into her and that made me focus less on... you know, God. And so I have to prove that I can be dedicated to him again and then maybe he’ll give her back to me or she’ll probably notice that I’m really trying and...” he trailed off with a sigh.

  Craig shrugged, “I was thinking more like fishing, but guess you can take that road.”

  “You don’t agree with me,” Reuben said in an insulted tone.

  Craig looked thoughtful for a moment, “Nope, no I don’t...”

  “What?”

  “Naw man, listen. The reason y’all broke up is cause Lisa’s miles away, and on top of that, you’re two very different people, wanting different things, y’all are not meant for each other. Most importantly God can’t make her love you.”

  Reuben looked at him in disbelief and hurt, “No, Lisa is... she’s perfect. She’s talented and so, so anointed man. You’re right, about one thing, just like she said, she’s in a different place than me.”

  “Perfect? Perfect for who? No one’s perfect. Man is a load of... nothing – nothing, that’s a good replacement right? Anyway what am saying is we’re not perfect, none of us, we try to be yes, but we’re not and for you to say she’s perfect is... is... blasphemy!”

  “What?

  “Ok sorry, maybe not blasphemy but something in that range. I am new to this, the concepts sometimes escape me,” he sighed and shook his head, “you know what, just think about it alright, don’t go trying anything stupid.”

  Reuben nodded, “I hear you man, but I think I’m right.”

  He took a moment before he came out of the vehicle, secretly he dreaded going in. It wasn’t just what the people would say; the words of encouragement that he wanted to escape, but the thought of kneeling before God right now, when he was so sore about his situation, it sunk him with guilt.

  “Are you Reuben?”

  He jumped and turned in the direction of the low baritone, the figure leaning against the wall didn’t move and for a moment, Reuben was a bit spooked.

  “Who’s asking?” he asked, straightening his back and narrowing his eyes at the hooded statue in the shadows.

  The shadow unfolded his arms and sauntered toward him, until the light from the church fell on the lower part of his face, revealing broad lips and a crooked nose, the hood of his sweater hiding his eyes.

  “Well are you?” he asked, his voice rich with impatience.

  Reuben regarded him for a moment, he didn’t know him and he had a tendency to maintain his guard when meeting strangers in the early hours of the morning, whether or not they knew his name. But surprisingly he was not afraid of the hooded figure standing before him.

  “I am,” he replied finally.

  The stranger nodded, “good. I heard you were looking for a bass player,” he said, removing his hood.

  Reuben and Craig had a small gospel band that they operated at the downstairs of his house. It wasn’t much, but they had fun together, mostly because they all loved music so much.

  Recently their bass player had left for studies in China and they’d been looking for a replacement, no one was supposed to know except the people at their church.

  Usually, Reuben didn’t take on anyone that he didn’t know or didn’t attend his church, but he had a good feeling about this guy.

  God, I hope I don’t regret this, he prayed, “Are you any good?”

  The stranger smiled, “I’ll let you decide.”