by Kerri Ann
I set the glass down. “Was your week as eventful as mine?” I ask, hoping to distract my mind from my true wishes.
“Busy, but nothing like yours I bet. Congratulations on winning your case.”
“Thanks.”
“You don’t seem happy?”
“My best friend slash ex-wife asked me to never contact her again. She left me divorce papers, moved out of the house, and won’t answer my calls. I knew there was a chance our friendship could falter, but with everything, I’d hoped that Elaine wouldn’t desert me.” I laugh at that. “That’s silly, isn’t it? Carli’s right. I’m being a posh pussy.”
“I’m not quite sure what that means, but if you believe it, I guess so.”
Laughing it off, I tell Tyler the conversation I had with Carli just recently, and how she has a way with words. She can tell you off in lyrical and ingenious ways.
Over the next few hours, it felt the same as the previous week. I relaxed, I enjoyed the company of others, and I wasn’t judged for my sexual tendencies. We’ve all dealt with the same stereotypes and stigmas. It’s a relief that I feel so at ease around everyone here. Tyler, Julia, and their family have made me feel included. I feel their loyalty. It scares me that I’ll lose this when I return to Indiana, where I’ll be all alone again. Taking in all the conversations that go on around the table, each are individual, yet interchanging. I can be talking to Tyler when Jax pops in. It’s not intrusive, it’s inclusive. Sadly, I won’t have it when I leave.
“What’s wrong?” Tyler asks me, clearly interested. It makes me feel worse in a way.
“I’m just sad is all. Your family is an amazing group. I’m not sure how big the rats nest is that I’m running into when I get home tomorrow. Honestly, I’m disappointed to leave this.”
“Give me your phone, Chris,” Tyler says.
Handing it to him, I watch him type into it, then turn it towards himself to take a couple pictures. Tyler smiles and hands it back. “There. Now you’re not alone.”
Flicking through the pictures he’s just taken, Tyler has added candid shots of Jax and Troy, comfortable, at peace, and smiling with love in their eyes at one another. A picture of Jim comforting Tig’s daughter with Tessa grinning is another. A rare photo of Rush smirking in a devilish way towards his Julia. And lastly, a picture of Tyler himself. Scribbled across the photo is a number and the words, call anytime.
“Thank you.”
Shrugging it off, as if it’s the most natural thing in the world, Tyler’s eyes smile behind the wire rim glasses. Pocketing my phone, I grasp his hand, giving it a light squeeze. “You have no idea how much it means.”
Chris
After brunch, Tyler asked if I wanted to try to grab that coffee. As we walked along the city streets, things were more relaxed. Our conversations were plentiful this time. We laughed, joked, talked about some of the silliest stuff, and that was only within three blocks.
It was a longer walk to the coffee shop than I’d expected, and for some reason, I thought we’d be turning the corner for a little Mom-and-Pop shop. Something with mismatched chairs, doilies for table cloths, and chipped tea cups. Turning a corner, with Central Park on one side, and dark brick apartment buildings on the other, we enter a bright and airy lobby.
“Good afternoon, sir.” The man behind the desk greets, inspecting me from head to toe. “You’re back from brunch early today. Is everything all right?” He’s sizing me up. He’s wondering if I belong there—If I belong here beside Tyler.
“It’s great. Thank you, Brent. How’s your day so far?”
“Terrific, sir. Terrific.”
Bypassing him and pushing the button for the lift, Tyler smiles my way.
As we wait for the elevator to arrive, Tyler asks, “Tea, right?”
“A tea sounds good.”
With the doors opening then closing, and us confined in the tight space, I laugh at the elevator music. It’s a goofy tune I know well from a popular movie. Humming along, bobbing my head, I count the floors above as we rise.
Fourteen, fifteen…
Twenty-two, twenty-three…Before we finally stop on twenty-seven.
Somewhere along the walk we’d held hands, and now I look down at our still joined hands.
Before last week, I was afraid to show the world who I really was. Realizing I’m comfortable for probably the first time in forever, I’m relaxed.
Releasing my hand and reaching into his pocket, Tyler steps out and directly to a door across the hall. P27 in beautiful pewter adorns the door. Unlocking it, then standing to the side, Tyler smiles apprehensively. I’d be fearful too. Not like I’ve had the best track record since I’ve met him for smart ideas, great relationship decisions, and quiet companionship, so I’d say it’s warranted.
“Come on in.” Walking past me, he heads into the space. “Make yourself at home while I start up the machine.”
“Thanks,” I say as he walks off towards the kitchen.
Looking out the windows at the picturesque Central Park with its historic beauty and brilliant hues, I don’t notice as Tyler approaches from behind me.
Softly touching my shoulder, he places a kiss on the back of my neck, then brings a hand around my waist. With a gravelly voice, he says, “Don’t turn, or I might change my mind.”
I stay still, though it’s taking everything in me to do so. Breathing by my ear seductively, he says, “How about we take this off.” Grasping the edge of my shirt, Tyler slowly, inch by inch, raises the material, along with my increasing heart rate. Once it’s high enough, I toss it over my head.
As commanded, letting it fall to the floor beside me, I stay still. I want to move as his hand searches the soft skin of my chest. I want to touch him, but I’m fearful of wrecking this subtle moment.
“It’s been a very long time for me, Chris. I’m afraid that trusting you is wrong. Tell me I’m wrong to trust you with my body and I’ll stop right now.”
Exploring my freshly shaven chest, searching out a nipple and the sensitive skin that trails to my navel, I have difficulty staying put. My breath hitches.
“I could never harm you. If we’re rushing things, then stop. I’ll drink the tea, put on my shirt and leave with a raging hard-on, but I’ll do it, Tyler.” As the warmth of the sun hits my chest, and the cold air tickles my back, I shiver slightly.
Twisting my torso, I turn my head, wanting him to see the truth of it in my eyes. It’s a vow I won’t break.
As his hands still search my body, I ask, “We’ll take it slow then?”
Seeing the truth—or the truth as he wishes to see it—Tyler nods, satisfied with what I give.
Slow is always, more fun anyway. Agonizing, but fun.
Moving his hands, and feeling his breath teasing the skin on my back, I’m excited beyond belief.
Pushing his body forward, crowding me, Tyler moves us closer to the bank of windows. “Hands on the glass, Chris.”
Without delay, palming it, I stare out at the busy city. “How...how long have you lived here?” I ask, trying to interject conversation to slow things down.
“I’ve lived here most of my life.” He leaves hot trails after his warm lips cool my skin. “My parents owned it for ages. It became mine when I took over the company.” As his hand edges the rim of my waistband, I find myself sucking in air in large gulps. With him exploring the edge of the tightly fitted chinos, my nerves are alight.
“Let me touch you. Let me turn around, Tyler. I want to see you, please,” I plead.
Flicking the button of the pants so they become loose, then pushing the zipper low, Tyler delves along the V of my hips.
“Jesus,” I say as he teases the hair, all but avoiding my cock. Hanging slightly to the left and low, I’m rock hard and painfully anticipating his touch.
“Please,” I plead again as he taunts me more. Never touching, yet brushing close, I ache to have his hands on me.
“I said slow. Can you do slow?” he asks teasingly.
Staying his hand, he pulls it free of my pants and grips my shoulder, motioning for me to turn. Eye to eye, looking into his deep depths, the seduction steams in his irises. He’s turned on and aching for it as much as I am.
With an honest expression, he says, “Show me what you need, Chris.”
“Kiss me. We’ll go from there.”
Grasping the sides of his head gently, rubbing my fingers along the soft stubble of his cheekbones, then rubbing a thumb along his soft upper lip, I relish the feel. As his eyes close and he hums with satisfaction, his lips part. Softly, slowly touching mine to his, I don’t my tongue on him, but enjoy the feel of his supple mouth. I’m becoming more turned on by the second. Trailing a hand through his hair, reaching down to untuck his shirt at the back, I pull it free. Feeling his soft back, I too hum my satisfaction. With a subtle move, Tyler dips his tongue to mine. Running it along the inside of my lip, then poking his tongue against mine, he hums my name before increasing the depth of our kiss. Back stepping slightly, pulling me along with him, he moves us through the room, bringing us to the couch. Hitting the edge of it, lying slightly across the arm, I don’t dare break the contact of our mouths. I don’t want to.
Using one arm to hold me above him, resting it on the arm of the couch, I lift his shirt. Feeling his chiseled chest, caressing the soft trail of hair that blends down to his tapered waist, I run my hand along the smooth skin. As it heats and pebbles below my touch, all of that makes me want to turn him on further.
“Slow,” I murmur as I skirt the edge of his pants, teasing him as he teased me. I won’t unbutton his pants, I won’t rush him. I won’t push him when things have been so hesitant.
Pushing my shoulders, lifting me off him, I kneel on the couch, perched above. His eyes are ablaze as he says, “Slow is for those who don’t know what they want.” Reaching down, pushing the edge of my pants low, he reaches inside to grasp my cock harshly. “And I want this.”
Growling out a long list of expletives, I think fuck is the only coherent one I can say.
Pushing the material low, exposing my painfully hard, aching cock, Tyler sneaks out from below me, causing me to fall back further. With one leg on the floor and one on the couch, Tyler pushes my knees out to gain access above me.
In seconds, without much warning, he covers my cock with his mouth. The heated moistness of his mouth, and the anticipation of the contact has me short of breath.
“Jesus!” I yelp out. Gripping the couch tightly, I swear my fingers will break. His mouth is causing an intensity I haven’t felt in a very long time. Sure, I’ve let other’s fuck me and I’ve fucked others, but it’s been a long time since someone gave me head.
Looking down on him, the contrast is exceptional. His blue eyes staring up at me, his milky skin covering mine as he bobs against my dark skinned cock. I watch with an intensity as it flexes against his mouth. I’ve been with many a man, but seeing him looking at me with such care is daunting. I’m truly afraid to disappoint or hurt him.
As he sucks deeply, my eyes roll back as my body takes over control of what it wants. “Tyler, I can’t think of the last time I let someone do that. Staying clean meant none of that. I’ve been cautious.”
Looking up at me, he releases me from his mouth. “I’m clean too.”
Licking my lips, I want to give him the same care. “Pants down, now,” I heave.
With a bright smile, Tyler lifts off the couch.
Tearing off his shirt, I wait to see what package lies beneath the covering. As he lets his trousers fall, I say with a smile, “No boxers.” Pushing the edge of mine until they too pool onto the soft carpet, I reach for his creamy, neatly trimmed and well-endowed cock. Crowned with precum, I’m eager to taste it.
“Condoms?” I ask before becoming too engaged.
“On the table.” Glancing, I see them resting in reach.
Pulling him by the nape, I kiss him deep. This time with searing passion. As our cocks touch, resting on each other, I’m beyond aroused. Reaching low, grasping his length and stroking it gently, but firmly, I break the kiss.
Smiling before I venture south, I kiss him sweetly on the nose. “Thank you,” I whisper, and I mean it. Bending down, coming to my knees in front of him, I take Tyler to mouth. The small bead I saw before is sweet as it hits my tongue.
Swirling his head with my tongue, pressing my mouth tightly around his length, I suck it deeply. Deeper than I ever have before. The smooth skin, the strong veins, the tantalizing hair that tickles my nose, all of it is fantastic. Running a hand around his waist, I pull his length tighter, closer to me as I massage his ass cheek. His muscles flex as he shouts out, “Fuck, Chris! That’s—”
He tries to complete the sentence but I suck him closer, delving a finger into the tightness of his ass. Curving it, pressing it forward, Tyler rides my finger and the pressure of my mouth around him. I feel my own cock growing painfully tight as it bobs against my leg. I so badly wish to be touched, but I’ll give Tyler the best I have first. Speeding up, grasping him, digging my fingers into his ass cheek with one hand and pumping a second within his ass, his balls tighten.
“No more. No more, please,” he speaks out, trying to rock, yet back away at the same time.
Releasing my mouth from around his cock, pulling my eyes towards him, I don’t remove my hand, allowing him to continue rocking gently to the pulse of my movements. “Lie down, Tyler. Let’s satisfy each other.”
Without hesitation, and a monster smile, Tyler lies on the floor. Spinning myself around so that we can mouth one another, I feel his touch exploring my ass, searching out the rim. Taunting me, I squelch, “No more teasing.”
I groan slightly at the contact as his mouth surrounds the head of my cock. Taking it deeply, I feel the tonsils in the back of his throat as he hums. Giving him the same, still pushing him towards an end, I massage the release out of him. Sucking him deep enough that breathing is difficult, we move as one. In and out, the two of us groan, growl, and search out the release we chase. Not far after, mine crests, and so does his.
With my body wracked with shudders, Tyler continues to hold my cock hostage within his mouth. Falling apart, lying to the side, we slowly pull ourselves away from each other.
“Well. That was slow, I guess,” I say, laughing slightly.
“How about that tea now?” Tyler offers.
“That sounds good.”
Tyler
Like a message in a bottle, my mind was devising a plan. All week he was everywhere.
There was a message on my desk from a Chris, an introduction to a Chris, a person in line at Starbucks named Chris, as if there was a scrap of paper telling me something apocalyptic or prophetic. My mind continually gave me cues that Chris was a chance I should take.
It may have been a mistake that Chris arrived at our brunch the first time, but the second time was Julia’s innate meddling. She and I talk weekly, we have for years, and over the course of me saying “No, Julia, I don’t need a man in my life,” and “No, Julia, he’s not my type,” she still invited him again anyway.
That brings us to now. Sitting at the counter, him sipping his tea and me, my espresso, the two of us seem like an old couple just talking of news, family, and life. It’s cordial, entertaining, and relaxing. It’s been a long time since I could say that about a man in my apartment, and from the sounds of it, it’s been a long time for Chris too. Most of the men he’s involved himself with were meaningless moments. Flings.
I know I took a chance on him, but there’s something I can’t deny. Never trying means never knowing, right? If I didn’t take a step, then I’m staying static. Stagnant.
“I don’t know if you’ve had to do this with your Carli, but I’ll be eating crow when I see Julia.”
As I lean on the counter, reaching for a few almonds that I keep in a bowl on the counter, Chris asks why. “And pray tell, why would you be e
ating crow?”
Staring across at the beautiful face of the first man I’ve let into my apartment, I see the confusion course through his features. He’s scared of the answer I’ll give. I smile, trying to save him. “Because Julia hooked this up. The woman is uber sneaky. I’m not sure if you noticed it or not.” I toss a few almonds into my mouth. “And she’s incorrigible when she finds out she’s right.”
“Well, we don’t want that. Might as well move out of state now.”
“You have no idea.”
“I hear Canada is nice this time of year. Do you think she’d chase us up there for an ‘I told you so?’”
“She’d blast it like a boom box from under my window if given the chance. I wouldn’t put it past her to hire a jet, a kayak, or a steamship if it meant she could do it face-to-face.”
Chris tosses his head back in a complete show of happiness. It’s intoxicating. I can’t deny it anymore, and I blurt out, “You really are beautiful.”
I’m entranced by the light in his eyes as his surprise turns to shyness. “Nah. I’m big. I’m a mess. I’m far from beautiful,” Chris states with his eyes turned toward the counter.
“You can’t tell me you don’t see it?” Setting my drink down, walking around to the other side where he sits naked on one of the barstools, I tell him, “Your eyes are mesmerizing. Since our very first meeting, I’ve wanted to pull your full lips between my teeth until you growl. And when you smile, it reaches every inch of your face. You are beyond beautiful, Chris.”
“I have a hard time believing you.”
I stroke a hand down his face. “You don’t believe what I see is true?”
He shakes his head. “No, I don’t. I see a scarred man. A man who’s made countless mistakes. Mistakes that have continually hurt those close to me.”
“You didn’t disappoint me. Otherwise, do you think you’d be here?” Turning his face up to look me straight on, I ask, “Would I have you here?”
