Altered

by Kimberly Montague

  He touched his lips briefly to mine. "You're the best girlfriend, baby." His wink warmed me more than the fire. "Well, when I was growing up, it was blue, but now it's yellow."

  "Yellow? I wouldn't have guessed that. Why yellow?"

  He was quiet and seemed to be holding back or trying to decide if he should hold back. When he finally looked up at me, I caught a glimpse of the pain and trauma he had survived in his lifetime. "My brother's favorite color was yellow—the color of sunshine. He loved bright things and smiling. When they put him in the hospital that last time, he just hated the room he was in. It was like the sky with clouds and stuff, but it was like cold or something. Ms. Klaussen, my eighth grade art teacher, gave me a whole roll of poster paper and my mom and I spent hours painting suns and rainbows, and as much yellow as we could. We went through so many things of yellow paint." He shook his head sadly with the trace of a smile on his lips. "I got so sick of that color."

  I reached out and grabbed his hand when he paused, already knowing this story didn't have a happy ending.

  "It was the last time I saw him smiling. After that, he was too tired—had fought too hard for too long—and I guess he just couldn't take it anymore. I never knew how he handled the shots and medications and blood test after blood test, like he was some kind of dart board or something. He was—you would have loved him, and he would have loved you. He liked to give me a hard time. Well, he gave everyone a hard time, especially the nurses, but not like a mean kid, just funny. He loved to laugh and smile… I don't know why I hung on to his favorite color, but it just stuck with me."

  "It's in your subconscious," I suggested, having experienced something similar. "It's like a way of hanging on to him and remembering. I worry I'm forgetting them all. I can't remember the exact shade of my Aunt Mallory's eyes or if my grandpa's nose had the same bump as my dad's. I loved them so much, but I'm so afraid I might forget these things about my mom and dad—I don't want that to happen."

  He put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me closer to him. "We can help each other remember things. Where were your parents from?"

  "My dad was from Chicago, but he had lived in California since he was seven. My mom's family had been here for three generations. What was your brother's name?"

  "Darren no-sharin' Vaughn."

  I giggled then, not only for the nickname, but for the way Dev said it. He was so proud of who his brother had been—it made me love him even more. We talked about our loved ones for hours, exchanging stories and bits and pieces of their lives. It was odd how much closer I felt to my parents when Dev was asking me questions about them, as if they still fit into my life somehow, as if they were still necessary.

  Casa Diablo

  As it became light outside, I tried my best to hide in Dev's arms. We were both on our sides facing each other, and I snuggled closer to his neck to avoid the dawning of another fearful day. When his kisses to my cheeks, my forehead, and my nose became quick and urgent, it was impossible to ignore what would likely happen today. I guess fear is not like adrenaline where your body eventually runs out or else I would have stopped being afraid long before then. As it was, I gripped Dev's arms and clung to him to the best of my ability.

  "I want to reverse time and start again." His voice was as urgent as his kisses had been.

  "What would you change?"

  "Obviously I'd beat the crap out of Jay the first chance I got in order to shut him up before he even had a chance to dare me into that damn cave." He paused, leaving a moment to think about how that would have changed everything—all the death and destruction it would have prevented. "I would've texted everyone on the planet to tell them you were mine after that very first kiss. In fact, I would have kissed you that moment you ran into me that first day."

  I smiled, imagining that. "You already had your hands all over me that day."

  He pulled out his I'm-sweet-and-innocent voice. "If I hadn't, you would have fallen over. I can't help it my presence does that to you. I can't prevent how damn sexy and irresistible I am."

  "I can't argue with that." I threaded my fingers through his short, soft hair and pulled him closer to me.

  Against my lips, he whispered huskily, "I knew you wouldn't be able to. It's another reason we go so well together. The only person sexier and more irresistible than me is you."

  Donald crawled near us. "Vaughn? Piper? Are you awake?"

  The second his tentative voice intruded upon our carefree moment, Dev's arms squeezed me tightly—tightly for me at least, which told me how strongly he didn't want to let me go. It took a lot of control not to get teary-eyed, but somehow I managed it.

  Donald nudged our feet. "We need to move, Vaughn."

  Dev was nodding his head even though he didn't say anything. He just kept staring intensely into my eyes. Donald only stayed there for a moment before moving away from us. We could hear him loudly announce that everyone needed to get up and start gathering their things together.

  "I'm afraid to let go of you, baby." The sadness and fear in Dev's voice affected me far more than his words. They made me want to get moving to safer territory.

  "Me too, but we have to move. We both know we have to move."

  He nodded again, but this time he sat up, pulling me along with him. We were the last ones to actually get our stuff together, but because of our ability to move quickly, it didn't take us long to be back in the front of the group with Ted, Kim, and Donald. Sonya and Gary were right behind us when we started winding our way up through the wilderness. Despite the rest, it seemed as if we were all dragging ourselves. Obviously, mental exhaustion actually exceeded the physical exhaustion.

  The kids were quiet, but fidgety in a nervous way just as Butcher seemed to be. Every few minutes, my furry boy would stop and look back in the direction we had walked. It made me fidgety and nervous. Jay was likely to be following us, and I couldn't help but wonder how close he was. The thought that they had been able to defeat a group of National Guard soldiers made me worry that we stood absolutely no chance at all against them.

  After several hours of walking, Dev and the "infecteds" conferred over the time and place of a possible attack. Their extrasensory ability to smell gave them higher accuracy as to how close Jay's group was to us. I tried to be upset over once again being left out of the loop of strategy, but I was simply drained of everything and anything useful, my emotions taking a toll on the strength of my entire body.

  "We need to hide somewhere," were the only words Dev said as he rejoined my pace.

  I nodded softly. "The families can't outrun the psycho brigade."

  He grabbed my hand again—he hadn't been out of physical contact with me all day. "We really need somewhere large that's covered in some way. It has to offer some sort of protection, even if it's only a visual hiding place."

  "Right," I absent-mindedly responded as Butcher stopped walking again. His German Shepherd ears were extended way up into the air, and he was growling low. "What, boy? What do you hear?"

  "They're close," Dev explained as he pulled me to a stop. "Faster, people!" he shouted to the group behind us. "Hurry. Really push yourself. Right now!" He sounded like Coach Hayman at track practice, except Coach Hayman never had the desperate edge to his voice that Dev had.

  "Dev, I forgot!" Ted shouted as he ran, sliding here and there, down the mountain. "I can't believe I forgot about Casa Diablo. The old mine. It's just up ahead!"

  "Thank God," Dev breathed before shouting again. "Hurry up everyone! There's a place to hide ahead—run to it. Come on," he encouraged as he turned back to me. "Run there. Take Butcher and hurry. I need to grab some kids."

  I nodded, knowing he'd be strong enough to help the slower people move more quickly. I felt a little guilty that I couldn't help, but the earth was so rocky underneath my feet that I had to carefully watch my own footing just to make it up without falling on my butt. Butcher was much faster than me, making it five feet in front of me then pausing to look back at me im
patiently with his ears still extended high into the sky.

  As I got to the top of the ridge, Donald stood at a rusted metal chain-link fence that protected the entrance to a mine built into the side of the mountain. Piles of timbers and various other types of debris decaying in mounds were tossed here and there. I could see a light inside the foreboding mine and assumed that Sonya had her flashlight out. My biggest concern was safety. If they had put up a fence to keep people out of the mine, wouldn't that mean that it was too dangerous to be inside it? But perhaps it was just dangerous to go exploring in it. By the looks of it, this was a mine from the times of the Gold Rush, so surely it would have collapsed long before now if it was going to.

  Ted and Kim stood just inside the mine and carefully took my arms to help me in as the entrance sloped down drastically for about five feet. I went to Sonya and Gary and dropped my head against Gary's shoulder, prompting him to put his arm around me. Sonya came up on Gary's other side and did the same creating our own little huddle. I grabbed onto Butcher's collar and pulled him into the middle. We didn't say anything—we didn't really need to—it was clear we were all scared, clear we didn't know what was going to happen, and above all, clear we all loved each other.

  When the next few people came into the cave, I looked up to discover it wasn't Dev. My worry shifted from a general fear for everyone's safety, to the beginnings of panic about Dev's whereabouts. I let go of Sonya and Gary and walked back toward the entrance.

  Gary followed and placed his hand silently on my shoulder. "Where is he?"

  Kim was watching for Dev as well. "I'm sure he's just helping the others. I think we have one more family still out there." Her voice was full of fear, but there was something odd about it I couldn't figure out. She seemed to be trying to hide her fear, but she had never been one of those I-need-to-be-the-tough-girl types, so it seemed very out-of-place.

  Pulling the shotgun into my hands, I stood at the entrance just in case I was needed. If Dev didn't show up in another sixty seconds, I was going after him. I counted in my head, 60… 59… 58… 57, with every passing second my panic increased.

  At 43, I saw his face as he carried a young girl—maybe seven years old—in his arms with her mom on his back. The father and teenage sister followed closely behind. My heart started beating normally again, and I lowered the gun. Once he was inside the mine, I threw myself into his arms, holding him as close to me with my one free arm as possible. He rubbed my back and looked at me like he didn't understand why I was freaking out.

  "I got worried," I explained.

  "No need to worry about me, I'm bullet-proof—can't take me down." Something was wrong. There was absolutely no arrogance in his tone of voice. Instead, it shook and broke as if he was going to cry. He kissed my cheek—hard, then my neck and held me to him painfully tightly.

  "Hey now," I grunted, "I was using those lungs." I tried to tease him, but he didn't let go, just lightened his grip enough to bring his lips to mine in a bruising kiss. It was full of sparkling electricity, but it felt odd. I couldn't figure out why. It was like no kiss we had ever shared before, and it left me looking up at him in a daze with undeniable confusion. What was it I was missing?

  "I need to see how close they are." The corners of his mouth were turned up a little, but he was focused on my forehead as he stood there running his fingers through my hair.

  I looked toward the entrance where I had last seen Ted and Kim standing. "Isn't that where the others went? Can't they, you know, smell them on their own?"

  "I'm better at it than they are. I'll be right—" his voice cracked, and he coughed, lightly clearing his throat. The dusty dank smell inside the cave was eerie and had several people coughing. "I'll be right back, k? Here, I'll even take the gun if that will make you feel better."

  "Okay, just be careful, huh? Don't do anything stupid."

  "You know me." He winked, but there was a sadness to it. It was dark inside the cave though, so I thought maybe I was misreading everything.

  "Yes, I do know you." Kissing his cheek lightly, I poked him in the stomach. "Mr. Bad Choices."

  He didn't comment on my joke—didn't laugh or chuckle—just kissed my forehead and walked out of the entrance. I turned back to Sonya and Gary who were frantically searching their backpacks.

  I watched them for a moment before asking, "What's up?"

  Sonya's face was full of determination as she continued to dig through the bags. "We can't find the bullets for the handgun."

  "I'm telling you." Gary was impatiently shoving his hand in the front of his backpack. "They were in the front. I showed them to Dev this morning when he asked me about it."

  Something in my brain started flaming red. I was so tired though, I had to focus to put the pieces together. Walking back to the entrance, each step I took brought with it a little more clarity. Dev and the other "infecteds" were outside the mine on their own. Kim was petrified, but covering it up. Dev was more scared than he had been, but not just scared, he was sad, like goodbye sad. Goodbye… Goodbye! My brain shouted at me, and I rushed the last few steps to the entrance. I forced my feet up the slippery slope to the gate just outside, looking for Dev—searching for Dev.

  I was able to breathe a sigh of relief when my eyes connected with his. But his were so blue, so clear, so Caribbean-colored, and shiny with moisture. I didn't understand. I didn't really connect the dots until I went to push open the gate on the chain-link fence… and couldn't.

  "No," I breathed.

  I shook it, knowing full well it wasn't going to open. Dev's forehead creased as he watched me violently shaking it as hard as I could.

  "No!" I screamed at him. "You can't do this!"

  He was shaking his head at me as he handed Donald the shotgun and walked toward me. "Baby, it's the only way."

  "No! Dev, no!" I yanked and shook and kicked.

  He kept shaking his head with palms up in defeat. "You have to stay with the others. We can stop Jay. Evie, I know we can, but—"

  "Dev, don't." Kim's voice was so sympathetic and full of sorrow. "It won't help her."

  He put his fingers through the chain-link intertwining them with mine. "I love you so much, Evie. I need to know you're safe, baby. I can't let you sacrifice yourself."

  Donald turned around, and the setting sun glinted off something in Ted's hands… the handgun. "Dev, they're close."

  "You took the bullets?" Gary's voice was right behind me full of fear and a little anger. But I couldn't take my eyes away from Dev, afraid he would disappear.

  Dev shrugged. "Sorry, man, had to. You know what she'll do."

  "Then they are following Jay's group?" Gary sounded relieved, and I couldn't figure out why. Who was following Jay's group, and why would it lead to relief for us?

  Dev put one hand through the chain-link to caress my face. His eyes never left mine as he answered Gary's question. "They're right behind."

  "No!" I screamed as I finally put it together—the National Guard. "Dev, no! They'll kill you!" I shook the fence so hard Dev had to pull his hands away from it. "Let me out! Let me out!" I was crying now. I couldn't stop. I could barely see through the tears pouring rapidly out of my eyes. Sonya was beside me, Butcher was barking against my leg, and Dev just kept shaking his head at me, his face contorted in pain. "Dev. Dev, please." He was backing away from me, and with every step, I felt defeat stab me in the heart. "Please," I begged, "they’ll kill you. Let me out."

  "I love you Piper Kenley!" he shouted before turning and disappearing behind the line of trees.

  "Dev, I love you! Please, let me out!"

  Gary stood next to us cussing every word in his vocabulary while trying to find a weakness in the fence.

  The tears hadn't had time to dry on my cheeks before the sound of gunshots came ringing through the clearing. We were all quiet including all the people inside the mine who were straining to hear what was happening. Dev's wrestling teammate and the cheerleader whose name I still didn't know stood agai
nst the fence with us, listening for any clue of what was happening. My hands were shaking, and I closed my eyes, trying to hear better, but they must have been too far from the entrance to the mine.

  After what felt like forever, several figures came into view. It was so difficult to see what was going on with the sun setting behind them, but I could make out the shapes of maybe six or seven people fighting. I couldn't pick out which one was Dev or Kim or Jay even, but there was no way to miss the freakish way they were throwing each other around. It was like something out of some action-horror movie where the actors were hooked up to harnesses. There just wasn't a way for this to be really happening. I blinked several times, trying to make what I was seeing match what I knew was actually possible. When one dark body was cracked nearly in half in some kind of back-breaking wrestling move and thrown fifty feet up into a nearby tree, I gave up trying to make sense of it all.

  I studied each body, trying to make out the size and shape of Dev and Jay. I was only able to pick out Kim in the group because of her long blonde hair that glinted in the fading sunlight. She seemed to be fighting a smaller body; although, I couldn't tell if it was a boy or a girl. She was doing a pretty frightening job of beating the crap out of the "infected" with a long stick. After several really strong blows sending the "infected" further into the clearing and closer to us, she came near enough to see that it wasn't a stick—it was the shotgun. As she lifted the shotgun to take aim, I tried to make myself look away. I knew she was too close—only about five feet from the "infected's" head. At that range it would…

  The sound of the shotgun rang in my ears as I turned my face into Gary's shoulder. He put his arm around me, but it wasn't any comfort and did nothing to keep the image from taking up every inch in my head—the blood everywhere and pieces of… I shook my head trying to clear it.

  Two dark bodies were fighting their way further into the clearing, drawing my attention toward them. The smaller body was definitely not Dev's, but the other one seemed similar to Dev. Since Ted was built about the same as Dev it was just impossible to tell who was who. The smaller body effortlessly pulled Dev/Ted by the leg and threw him into the line of trees to the right of where I was standing. He hit the trunk of a tree really hard, making me wish even more to be out of this stupid cage where I might do some good. Thankfully, before the small infected guy could do anymore damage to Dev/Ted, who appeared unconscious, Kim aimed and fired the shotgun, hitting him in his shoulder. As she aimed a second time in the direction of his head, I was smart enough to turn my head into Gary's shoulder, missing the blood.