Tobias (The Kings of Brighton Book 1)

by Megyn Ward

  Even then I knew how crazy it sounded.

  Since my birth certificate said Unknown where my father’s name should’ve been, they stuck me in a group home before they even put my mom in the ground. Within six months, I found my way to Brighton and I never left.

  I met Gray about a year later. He was the same age as me. Something about him pushed through the fog and the noise of the hell I was living in. I think I recognized it—the fact that he had no one, same as me. That the people who were supposed to take care of him abandoned him.

  Jase came a few months later and it was the same. I knew he belonged to me. With us. That he was our brother. Unlike Gray and me, Jase got placed in a lot of foster homes because of the way he looked. People saw him and wanted him, like he was a cute little puppy in a pet store window. He always came back though, because he was feral. Didn’t like to be touched. Didn’t know how to be loved.

  Still doesn’t.

  Logan was last.

  I remember the way he stared us down, fists raised. Ridiculously outmatched but ready to take us on even though he knew he’d never win.

  Dead.

  That’s what he said when I asked him where his parents were. Dead. That’s all I needed to hear. All I needed to know because dead means gone. Dead means alone.

  And that made him one of us.

  That made him our brother.

  Happy birthday, Toby. This is going to be the most important day of your life…

  I spin the bracelet around, sending prisms of light, dancing around the room. I think about the night I gave it to her. How happy it made her.

  How easily she slipped past every defense I had. So sure, so quick I didn’t even feel it. So deep I didn’t even know she was there until it was too late to dig her out.

  That’s when it hits me.

  When I realize something that jerks me out of my slump. Tightens my grip on the bracelet in my hands. Sends my heart galloping in my chest, so fast and loud, for a second it’s all I can hear.

  Silver was born on June 1st.

  My seventh birthday.

  The day my mother died.

  June 1st.

  The night I met her.

  The night I became a father.

  Happy birthday, Toby. This is going to be the most important day of your life… I wish I could be here to meet her.

  45

  Silver

  Tobias never knew his father. He met his mother at the restaurant she worked at when she was nineteen. They began a torrid affair that lasted nearly three years. Until Tobias’s mother got pregnant and refused to have an abortion. His father was very married and very wealthy. Even though he never said so, I get the impression that he’s famous. If Logan said his name, I’d know who he was.

  She died when Tobias was seven and there was no one. No one to take him. No one who loved him. After a series of group homes, he ended up in Brighton.

  “When Tob finally aged out, he found out his dad paid his mom off to keep quiet about who he was. She put the hush money his dad gave her in a savings account with his name on it. Almost ten million dollars.” Logan lifts his glass, laughing into it before taking a drink. “He came this close to withdrawing it and setting it on fire,” he tells me, holding his fingers up and pinching them together. “Instead he used it to become Tobias Bright.” The tone of his voice tells me he thinks burning it would’ve been the better of the two.

  I listen to Logan’s story. Let him try to convince me to give Tobias a chance. To let him in even though he’s shut me out at every turn. The truth is I want to.

  I want to find Tobias and tell him yes.

  Give him a chance.

  Let him in.

  But I can’t.

  Because Delilah was right.

  I know what it like to feel unwanted.

  Rejected.

  I’m afraid that Tobias won’t love Noah the way he deserves to be loved. I’m afraid that if I give him a chance, he’ll break Noah’s heart and I can’t risk it.

  He deserves better than what either of us were given.

  I think he can see it on my face because he nods, giving me a smile that I recognize as the same one Tobias gives me when he’s trying to hide his heart. “Thank you, for listening,” he says, sliding out of his chair. “And don’t worry, I won’t come back, but… if you need anything, Patrick knows how to find me.”

  And then he leaves.

  I stand in the kitchen and listen to the front door close. Noah jabbering away to himself through the open doorway to his room. The utter stillness and silence of everything else around me.

  That’s when I realize I’ve made a mistake.

  A horrible, terrible mistake.

  Because, yes—by keeping Tobias away, I’m protecting Noah. But I’m also hurting him. Because he deserves to be loved and it’s not up to me to decide by who.

  Delilah was wrong.

  Ohmygod.

  “Noah,” I call out, pushing myself off the kitchen counter I’m slumped against. Across the living room and down the hall. “Get your shoes—” When I push his bedroom door open, he’s sitting on his bedroom floor, wedging his shoes onto his feet. “on.”

  Shoes on his feet he stands up and looks at me. “Are we gonna go see my dad now?”

  My throat goes tight, my eyes burning and hot. I nod.

  “’Bout time. Bixby and me were—”

  Just then there’s a knock at the door. “Put your coat on,” I call over my shoulder, while I rush to answer it. “It’s probably the pizza—”

  I throw the door to find Sal, our pizza guy, standing on the other side of it. “Hey, Silver,” he says, “Hey, little man.”

  “Hi,” Noah says, yanking the pizza box out of his hand. “We’re gonna go find my dad.”

  I dig into my purse for my wallet and pull out a wad of cash. “Thanks, Sal.” I say, shooing Noah through the door so I can shut and lock it. Hustling him down the hallway, with Sal on our heels, I dig out my cell phone. Logan said Tobias has been at this place for the past three days. He also said that if I needed to get a hold of him, I could ask Patrick.

  Jabbing at the call button for the elevator, I dial Patrick’s number while Sal and Noah chatter at each other like a couple of monkeys. Listening to it ring, I reason I can just go up to his apartment. He only lives one floor up but I don’t want to waste time going up there if he’s not—

  The elevator doors slide open and there he is. Standing right in front of me.

  “We were just coming to look for you,” Noah crows beside me. “Do you like pizza?”

  Tobias looks down at him and gives him that wry grin of his. “I like pizza rolls better.”

  “So does my mom,” Noah tells him. “She hides them in a bag of frozen broccoli. She thinks I don’t know but I can smell them cooking sometimes when I’m supposed to be asleep.” Noah looks up at me. “They don’t smell anything like broccoli.”

  “I know.” I smile down at him. When I look up, Tobias is watching me. “We were coming to find you,” I tell him, feeling ridiculous because everything I wanted to say to him seems to have floated away.

  “I heard…” the elevator doors start to slide shut and he steps off before it can close between us. “Look, I realized something today—something I should’ve said to you the other night.” He looks at Noah again. “Both of you.” Crouching down, he looks Noah in the eye. “Your mom’s pretty mad at me.”

  Noah nods. “I know. She used her mom voice on you.”

  “Well, I deserved it.” Tobias laughs. “I was a pretty big jerk.”

  “Did you lock yourself in the bathroom?” Noah’s eyes go wide. “She hates that.”

  Tobias laughs. “No,” he says, shaking his head. “I kept asking her what she wanted from me—what she expected me to do about being your dad when what I should’ve done is tell her what I wanted.” He takes the pizza box out of Noah’s hands and sets it on the floor. “I want to be your dad. I probably won’t be very good at it at first
—”

  Noah nods his head like he understands perfectly. “Because you’ve never done it before.”

  “Exactly.” Tobias smiles again. “But I want to try. I’ll be here for you and your mom and I won’t give up. I won’t go anywhere. I’ll keep trying until I get it right. Will you let me do that?”

  Noah furrows his brow. “Can we go fishing like you said?”

  “That’s up to your mom.” Tobias looks up at me. “She’s the boss.”

  Noah follows suit, looking up at me. “Can we, Mom?”

  I’m terrified. A part of me still wants to snatch Noah away and run but I know that I can’t. That Tobias deserves a chance to get it right, almost as much as Noah deserves a father who loves him.

  I feel Tobias slip his hand in mine. His fingers squeeze around mine. Telling me what he wants.

  He wants us.

  Finally finding my voice, I nod and whisper. “Yes.”

  Epilogue

  Tobias

  June 1st, 2019

  “You got ‘em?” I say, looking down at the boy standing beside me, holding the strings on a balloon bouquet big enough to carry him away.

  “You’re gonna have to stop asking me that,” Noah says, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk to show me the wad of strings he has securely wrapped around his hand. “I’m six.”

  “Sorry, kid,” I say, flashing him a smile while holding the door open for him to walk through. “I’m nervous.”

  “Why?” He tips his face up to look at me. “You’ve been a dad for a whole year now. You’re pretty good at it.”

  He’s right. I am pretty good at it.

  A year and a half ago I was a hot mess but now… “Thanks for letting me practice on you.” I say, reaching over to ruffle his hair and he lets me, which is a new development. In the beginning he insisted on shaking my hand when I dropped him off after spending the day together. We’ve moved on to high-fives and fistbumps.

  Someday, I’m hoping for a hug.

  Even though I knew what I wanted, I agreed to take things slow with Silver. After a few months of commuting, I moved to Boston and into Patrick Gilroy’s apartment one floor above Silver’s. Seems he patched things up with his girl and moved back in with her, which made me happy in more ways than one.

  I bought furniture. Stuff. I settled in. Made a home for Noah while trying to spend as much time with him as possible. Picking him up from schools a few days a week. Saturday afternoon laundry and pizza, camped out on the living room floor. Sundays morning fishing trips. Until one night I brought him home and Silver asked me if I wanted to stay for dinner and I never left. That was almost a year ago.

  “You’re welcome,” Noah says. “Can I push the buttons?”

  “Button.” I tell him as the elevator doors slide open and we step in. “One button—” I point to the one marked 3 while making sure the box under my arm is secure. “We don’t have time to stop on every floor.”

  “Why?” he says jabbing his finger against the button. “It’s not like she’s going anywhere.”

  He’s right again. Silver isn’t going anywhere. “Because I miss her,” I tell him. I decided a while ago that honesty is the best way to deal with his questions.

  “We just saw her this morning,” he reminds me. “Remember, she told you to go home and shower and take me with you so she could have some peace and quiet.” The elevator doors slide open and I usher him out, making sure none of the balloons in his charge get stuck in the elevator.

  I remember. She kissed me and said you’re driving me crazy, Tobias before threatening to have the nurses throw me out if I didn’t go home and leave her alone for a while.

  I didn’t have the heart to tell her that I own the hospital.

  “I remember,” I say showing him the box under my arm. “I’m hoping if I come baring gifts, she’ll let me back in.”

  I can hear them from clear across the ward. Loud, booming voices—laughing and cutting up before I even have a chance to push the door open.

  “… seriously, though—when are you gonna finally ditch the old man and run away with me?”

  “Uncle Jase is tryin’ to get Mom to marry him again,” Noah says, shaking his head at me like I’m asleep at the wheel.

  Truth is, I keep asking her and she keeps telling me no. She says she’s watched her father run through a stack of wives as tall as I am and she doesn’t have much faith in the institution.

  What I do have faith in is you, Tobias. Us. That’s all I need. As long as you love me, that’s enough.

  I do love her. So much it scares the hell out of me sometimes. And if it’s enough for her, it’s enough for me.

  For now.

  “Your uncle Jase wouldn’t even know what to do with a woman like your mom,” I say loudly, pushing open the door to the private room Silver and my brothers are jammed into. As soon as we’re in, Noah lets go of the balloons and they go floating and bouncing, every which way so he can climb Logan like a jungle gym.

  When he hears my voice, Jase looks up from where he’s sitting in a chair beside Silver’s bed. “He’s not wrong, kid,” he says with a grin before looking at me. “When are you going to marry her?”

  “As soon as she says yes,” I say, pushing him out of the way so I can lean over and give her a kiss. “I was gone for three whole hours,” I say when she narrows her eyes at me. “And I brought you something.” I reach under my arm and produce the box I’ve been hiding.

  “You brought me Poptarts.” Silver’s mouth curves into a smile. “I think you might love me a little.”

  “I brought you strawberry Poptarts and maybe I do—a little.” I kiss her again. “Where is she?”

  Silver settles back into the pillows. “Gray has her.”

  I look up and over, finding Gray and Logan standing by the windows on the other side of the bed, cooing over the pink swaddled bundle in Gray’s arms. Noah perched on Logan’s back, head aimed over his shoulder so he can see her.

  “Let me,” I say, skirting the bed and reaching for her. I haven’t held my daughter in a few hours and I’m getting itchy.

  Gray hands her over reluctantly. “Silver says you haven’t named her yet,” he says, his gaze still latched on the baby girl in my arms.

  “We named her in the car, right, Dad?” Noah pipes up, reaching out to run his fingers along the light dusting of soft, dark hair on his sister’s head.

  “We did,” I say, giving Silver a look over my shoulder and she smiles at me because I think she knows and she wants me to know she approves.

  “Well,” Logan says, giving me a wry grin I recognize as my own. “Let’s hear it.”

  I look down at my daughter and smile. “Her name is Bethany Lynn Bright.” As soon as I say it, she opens her eyes and looks right at me. Dark blue. Just like mine. “She’s named after my mother.”

  The End

  Don’t miss The Kings of Brighton: Grayson

  From Ardor Press, 2019.

  If you loved Tobias Bright, you’re going to LOVE Patrick Gilroy. Here’s a expert from Pushing Patrick, book one in The Gilroy Clan…

  46

  Patrick

  2014

  Fuck me, I’m tired.

  Like, forget-food-fuck-showering-on-the-verge-of-passing-out tired.

  Unfortunately, sleeping isn’t on the short list of my fraternity brothers’ priorities. Ever seen Animal House?

  That’s where I live.

  How I—straight-laced, study-groups, bed-by-ten-on-a-school-night me—managed to pledge the fraternity that thinks the fact that it’s Wednesday is cause enough to tap a half-dozen kegs and invite the known universe over to party, I’ll never know.

  Wait. Yes, I do. Conner.

  I pledged Kapa Sigma Pi because my cousin convinced me that if I wanted the full college experience, I needed to join a fraternity.

  Two years in and I want to kill Conner. Sometimes more than I want to sleep.

  You need to loosen up on the reins a bit, Cap’n. Li
ve a little.

  You’ve got your whole life to grow old.

  Cap’n. Short for Captain America. He’s been calling me that since we were kids, reading comics in the storeroom of his father’s bar. Because, according to him, I’m a paragon of virtue and defender of justice. I used to like it—when I was nine.

  So, yeah. It’s Wednesday night, and the front lawn of our fraternity is littered with plastic cups and clothes. Yup—clothes. Because Sigma Pi parties aren’t clothing optional, they’re nudity required.

  Not all the way naked. You can keep your underwear on. If you want to.

  That part is optional, at least.

  I’m sitting in my car. Considering sleeping in it. Maybe heading back to the library and bedding down in the stacks. Just as I decide that it might actually be preferable to listening to sorority girls vomit all night long, my phone rings. It’s Rob, my roommate. I pretty much hate everything about him, but I tolerate him because he’s my fraternity brother and I take his shit because that’s what I do. I take shit. Keep the peace.

  “You try sleepin’ in your car again,” he shouts into the phone, loud enough to have me pulling my cell away from my ear. “The brothers and I are gonna gift wrap it.”

  Shit. That means they’re going to plastic wrap my car. With me inside. “Actually, Conner just called. I think I’m going to head—”

  “Nice try, pussy,” Rob says over the loud music and shouts coming from inside the house. “Your cousin’s in the kitchen.”

  Of course, he is. Because the real reason Con pushed me to join Sigma Pi was so, he’d have open access to all their parties. And all the girls who attend them. “Okay,” I say, giving in. “One beer and I’m out—got it.”

  “Yeah, whatever, bitch,” Rob says, laughing. “Just get your ass in here.”

  I hang up and get out of my car, slamming the door a little too hard, before walking around the side of the house toward the back door. If I go through the front, someone will be there to confiscate my clothes for sure. At least this way, I have a chance of keeping my pants on.