The Toll

by Jeanette Lynn

  The baby was him, had to be, and the other trolls I’d glimpsed in my last flashes—I mean, Ornthren—they must be his siblings from his mother’s past lovers. Could it be? Was that what the curse had meant, as well? Not just for Gersthart, but the Lady of the Lake? Had Wind, Fire, and Earth’s curse been meant as the first part of Niniane’s punishment, to atone, and the curse of the Ornthren meant to keep her in line, assuring nothing like that happened again?

  It made sense, but I wasn’t about to ask anyone to clarify any time soon.

  If she has that many children... I thought to myself, she must have horrible taste in men. That was a lot of Ornthren, and she’d cursed them all into existence.

  Fingers sliding down my nape, Troll’s thumbs ran along the scars marring my breasts, tracing the swirling runes. “An’ look what he’s done to ye. Ruined this,” he hissed as he pressed his fingers caressingly over my markings again, his tongue following soothingly after. “They don’... they dinna hurt ye now, do they?” When I didn’t answer immediately, he snarled into my shoulder. “Name him, luv. I’ll track him down meself, gut him like a pig. No one hurts ye.”

  No one but... him? The words hung in the air, heavy and unsaid, but still hovering over our heads.

  “Is that how you see me?” My voice had gone small and quiet, but the anger filling it was rife with conviction.

  “Mine? Yes,” he grunted, arrogant as ever but missing the point.

  “You said I’m... I’m...” I couldn’t even say it! Squelching a frustrated screech, I gritted out, “I’m ruined to you, then? Is that it?” Voice was high and tight as I forced out the last words, I ignored the concern I thought I’d just seen, as well as possibly sensed, my voice cracking at the end, and struggled to pull away from him. “Is that how you see me? Tainted? Your... damaged bonded? Scarred?” Flicking his shoulder markings, mood muted but still hovering on the peripherals, my body still alive with an inner sexual fire that I’d swear was trying to eat me alive, I glowered up at him, lids narrowing to tiny, angry little slits. Flashing bright blue, the glow of my gleaming eyes reflected off his skin in the dim light.

  Blinking down at me, he muttered, gripping my wrist, “Yer eyes be glowin’.”

  I didn’t care.

  “Good. We have that in common now, too. We both look possessed. Tell me, lover, how is your flesh any different from mine now, hmm? Shouldn’t you be happy we look like twins?! One less human thing about me! Your poor, deceitful little bonded!” Growling under my breath, I shook off his hold.

  His face crumpled for a minute, a flash of deep pain mixing with a lifelong sadness, before it was quickly gone. “No... it isna what I-”

  Steam practically smoking from my ears, I was beyond being the sensitive one in this coupling. Resentment, fresh and crisp as the moment I woke up, filled me anew. Simply put, I exploded.

  “Then what? Huh? What, then? It’s all you ever talk about! The puny, inferior human you’re stuck with! The one you marked, claimed, then refused to listen to! Yes, me,” my hand reached up and slapped my chest, “your lady wife! Your bonded! The one who was practically begging you to listen to her, to explain, and you were too blinded by all that pent up anger and frustration you carry around like a loaded pistol to listen.” Forget pistol, too small, it was more like a cannon.

  “I dinna wish this fer ye!” he bellowed, making as if to roll off the bed and storm away.

  “Then why did you bond with me!” I fairly screamed, gripping his forearm.

  “I... I...” gritting his teeth, spittle flying loose, he stifled a frustrated roar. “I canna talk ta ye like this!”

  “Oh? Why not? Why not now? Why... now is the perfect time! Unless you had something else in mind?!” It didn’t matter if he’d explained, I was already beyond irrational.

  Trying to shake me off, he growled low, “Dinna be leavin’. I’ll be... back. Ye stay. We end up wakin’ up an’ I’ll tan yer bleedin’ hide, woman.”

  Grabbing at his wrist, I wrenched on his arm hard. “NO! We do this now! You’re running.”

  Jerking away, he ripped his arm away, turning away from me.

  “Hey! Face me, you coward!”

  Whole body tensing, nostrils flaring, I thought he might internally combust if he didn’t let some of all that, little bit of everything balled up into one massive anger ball, out soon, but, just as quickly as he’d puffed up, he deflated, murmuring, “An’ what if I am?” When I didn’t answer, he shook his head.

  Stunned speechless, my mouth opened but nothing came out.

  Troll’s shoulders sagged and his lips pulled down. “Remember what I said, nugget. Dinna be leavin’. I need to...” Grunting, he hissed and muttered, “Just don’t leave.”

  Something snapped at his attempted retreat, a primal instinct telling me to catch my bonded—don’t let him give in. Mate him. Subdue him. MINE. It was that odd sense I’d developed, driving me, and it wasn’t to be ignored.

  “I loved you!!” Rolling to my knees, my fists balled tightly at my sides and I ignored the unbecoming jiggling of my very naked body in my wake, ready to have this out, waiting for the giant, overbearing oaf to say something. Anything.

  He didn’t, unable to meet my eyes, simply looked away, turning his back on me fully.

  He’s quitting, the fool. Giving up. He’s turning away from me? Me!

  How dare he!

  That was the last straw, the culmination of everything before I finally tipped over the edge. Fire boiled in my blood, racing through my veins like acid, and I was off. Screaming like a mad woman, Troll jerked and spun around at the sound.

  Taking him by surprise, I flew forward and slapped his chest hard enough to make him yelp out loud, shocking him speechless as I launched myself at him, sliding my leg over his thigh, pinning him back down on the bed.

  “I loved you!” I bellowed, tears suddenly pricking my eyes as I beat at his chest with heavy fists, lost in my fit of violence. “I loved you... you wouldn’t trust me, not once. You cursed me and called me a liar! And I loved you! I’ve never, ever deceived you! You know this, I told you this, incessantly, but still, you refused to even think... to... And stupidly, still, I... Aaaargh! You... you make me so crazy! Sometimes I hate you!”

  Grasping my wrists in his huge, oversized mitts, he stilled them, hitching me up high on his chest until we were nose to nose. “Believe me, nugget, not half as much as I do.” Breath mingling with my heaving pants, his own slow and steady, measured, his eyes never left mine as they bore into me.

  Shocked, I stumbled, sputtering as I gawped.

  “Ye dinna think I hate meself fer what happened? I do. Failed ye.” Watching me searchingly, he released me the minute I stopped trying to fight him.

  “That’s not helping any.” The anger in my voice was still there, pitched low, loud enough for a certain Troll with inhuman hearing to make out, but I felt my ire slowly deflating.

  At the odd look on his face, I growled. Brows still furrowed, head tilted, askance, he studied me questioningly.

  “You can’t say things like that when I’m mad at you,” I huffed, irritated at the fact I even had to explain.

  Expression tightening, his eyes glittered warningly. “An’ why is that, nugget?” his deep, gravelly voice rumbled quietly. “Dinna be thinkin’ ye can tell me what ta say, think, or feel. I’ll be sayin’ an’ doin’ as I like, an’ that’s that.”

  “Oh! You! I didn’t- Ugh!” Furious, I renewed my struggles, spitting and snarling mad, hissing when he quickly imprisoned my hands again, refusing to release me. “Do you know me at all? Argh! Everything is a fight with you! Everyone is after you, and everything is a battle! Grrr! Oh, you make me so... And just when I was thinking you had something beating in this!” Aiming for the middle of his chest, my hand slipped through his, punching him dead center.

  Yowling on contact, I pulled my hand to my chest, cradling the rapidly swelling appendage while it throbbed unmercifully, his only reaction to my assault a grunt and a
frown.

  “Feelin’ better now?” he snapped, snatching my upper arm as he dragged it closer, taking me right along with it as he tried to get a better look at the damage.

  “No!” I barked right back, scowling darkly in the face of the calm and collected look on his stern mug. It just angered me more. “I don’t!” In fact, I felt worse, much worse. At such close proximity, it was growing harder and harder to ignore the furnace laid out underneath me, all that hard male flesh at my fingertips, the lit flame, still blazing, burning inside of me.

  Fingers running carefully, caressingly over my tender flesh, he hummed in that soothing way of his, unconsciously softening my tensed up body as I melted unknowingly towards him. “Dinna break it, just bruised, maybe a sprain.” Glancing up, Troll froze at the look on my face.

  My breath hitched and I started lightly panting.

  Licking his lips, his eyes deepened with want. “Nugget?”

  Panting heavily, I slid back, but all that did was rub my aching, pounding sex along the thickness of his bare chest.

  Fingers digging into his flesh once more as I swallowed hard, he remained impassive beneath me, his jaw shut so tight he was panting through tightly clenched lips, body taut and beyond hard everywhere, he was wound up so tight, watching me avidly.

  Closing my eyes, head tilted towards the ceiling, I placed myself right where I wanted to be, biting my lip as I tried to resist, legs clenching as I froze just above him, putting up one last token effort to put an end to this before it started.

  Honestly, it was a useless fight and I knew it. Real and truthfully, I’d already given in. This was, more or less, a pathetic attempt on my part to prolong the inevitable, whether I was willing to admit it or not.

  “This doesn’t mean anything,” I whispered, if only to myself, quickly swiping away a tear before it fell.

  “I dinna do softness, nugget,” Troll grumbled softly, making it all that much worse. “Ye canna... I canna...”

  With a resigned sigh, I stopped and glanced down at him through hooded eyes, hardening my heart as much as I could. “Softness? I won’t be asking it of you, or anything else for that matter. I believe you’ve made yourself quite clear, but I’ll expect your fidelity if you wish to continue this,” my hand waved around for a moment, “arrangement.”

  It would work for me, I decided. It would have to. I could screw his brains out in our dream space every few nights, then continue on with my separate, merry life, as lovely as that is at the moment. Gossiping villagers, so eager to judge and condemn, would be none the wiser. And, most importantly, maybe I could buy myself some time, or build up a huge mental wall, to ward off this huge Ornthren shuddering under my fingertips, the one who’s thoroughly enthralled me.

  When Troll’s lips pulled back and he went to snarl, I held a hand up to stay him. Surprisingly enough, he complied.

  “As you’ve said before, we’re bonded, stuck with each other, whether we like it or not. There’s a... pull between us, I’ll admit it. I can’t stay away from you any more than you can avoid me. I didn’t know about the curse then, but I do now.” His face fell for a second, soon replaced with the carefully blanked mask I’d become accustomed to. “And from the looks of it, we’ll both pay,” as long as we both shall live, “but, for now, all I want, all I’m asking for, is this.”

  Without waiting, I swiftly impaled myself on his turgid flesh, inch after delicious inch, forcing my sheath to accept his swollen length until he was buried all the way to the hilt.

  “Nugget,” Troll choked out, gripping my ass to massage the generously rounded globes, tightening his grip to help lead in the dance as I rolled my hips and ground down, quickly setting the pace.

  My skin felt heated and tight, too tight, the runes along my skin flaming electric blue, the faster I went, pumping along his length fastidiously as I began riding him hard.

  Bodies slapping together loudly, harsh moans and groans erupted from our throats, wet sex noises renting the air, we didn’t care. Grinding down on him hard before pulling back enough for him to almost slide out, I worked his thick member hard, stopping only when he got too close, nipping and kissing his lips voraciously until his impending orgasm abated, then starting up all over again.

  “Teasin’,” he growled low. “Just fuck me. ‘Bout to blow. Want ta feel yer cunt wrappin’ ‘round me cock as I go. Ah, bleedin’... fuck! Like tha’!” Thumb reaching up between us and pressing into my tightened bud, he rubbed it in a teasing, quick circular motion, my sex rippling in response to his frantic attentions. That was it and I flew over the edge with a sharp cry.

  A harsh bellow slipped out of Troll’s throat as we both came, thick hands slapping to my hips to pin me to him tight, grinding our sexes together almost painfully as he gave me everything. Gasping as my body rippled in ecstasy, I fought his hold, shuddering as I continued to climax, legs trembling, rocking my hips grindingly back against him as he spilled his seed deep inside of me. My troll-lover kept up his attentions, guiding my hips, rocking into me slowly, until the last bits of pleasure slowly ebbed.

  Flopping back onto the bed, Troll let out a deep, contented sigh, his happy rumble on par with a purring, well fed cat. Leaning down slowly, careful not to lose our intimate connection, my sex still grappling to milk his, I rested my head on his wide chest, right over where his shriveled, uncaring troll heart was supposed to be.

  A long silence passed between us, but I didn’t mind. On the contrary, I found it quite comfortable. We can’t tear a strip off of each other when we’re both quiet. Sated and quiet.

  It didn’t last for very long, and soon I was ready for another go ‘round. I couldn’t explain it, I just wanted—no, needed—that intimate connection, to scratch that itch, and only he could do it. I needed the hum of our bond rushing through me, tainting my veins.

  Still impaled on his thick cock, I wriggled around a little restlessly. “Hope you didn’t actually plan on sleeping at all in this little dream world we’ve got going here.”

  Grunting in reply, Troll shifted underneath me, gasping when I clenched my inner muscles around him tight. Lifting up and grinning at the mild surprise in his slumberous eyes, my hands assumed the position—dug deeply into his chest—and I started slowly rocking my hips.

  It was going to be a long night.

  Watered Down

  Eyes blinking open, body slightly aching as my muscles protested any and all movement, my eyes took in my surroundings and I growled in frustration. Glancing down, I didn’t recognize the flowing, dark blue diaphanous gown draping my curvy frame, but I knew this cave well. The bed, the furs, the fire that was just beyond this room, if the warmth bathing me soothingly was any indication. It would be roaring and sparkling with blue and red tinted flames and magic dust, a life all its own. I’m under the bridge.

  “Ugh. What now? More weird dreaming? Can’t I just fall asleep for once?”

  The sex dream would have been a nice end to all of this... Whatever it is. We’d gone two more times, Troll finally calling an end to it by rolling me over and tucking me into his chest, my back to his front.

  With a grumbled, “Rest a minute, then we’ll talk,” he’d buried his face in my hair, let out a deep rumble, thick arms tightening, one banded around my breasts, the other my hips, and let out a deep breath, promptly falling asleep.

  Leaning into his touch, I’d yawned, unable to hold it back, my eyes slowly closing as one of Troll’s hands covered my breast, giving it a reassuring squeeze. The fingers of his hand at my waist had slowly slipped down moments later, past my navel, slowly and very un-stealthily reaching down to cup my sex. A few more minutes had passed and I’d lifted my head enough to glance down at his handy work.

  “Comfortable now?” I’d muttered sarcastically, squirming in his stifling embrace as I’d tried to turn around to face him.

  At my movement, he’d barked/mumbled something out gruffly, yanking me towards him just as I managed to turn, smooshing my face into his warm chest,
throwing a thick thigh over my hips to pin me in place. Nowhere else to go and no way to escape, I’d soon followed him into the dreaming. His muttered, “No, don’t leave,” and, “she’s mine. Kill you. No,” followed by the mumbling of my name, repeatedly, was eye opening.

  Rolling over quickly in my new dreamscape, I promptly fell right off the bed, smacking the rough, dirt cave floor with an ‘oomph’. This most definitely did not feel like a dream to me, at all. What a way to awaken.

  Stupid, magical beings, stupid... magic in general. Screeching under my breath, I bellowed at the dark earth that made up the walls as well.

  Waking up. Hah. Could one actually call this being woken up? I’m still dreaming!

  There was an odd warmth in my belly that I’d noticed for some time, not completely sated from the frantic escapades of our earlier tupping, muted but still strong, slowly gnawing its way back to the surface. Berating my traitorous body silently as I grumbled under my breath, still pissy, I chose to ignore it.

  Sighing heavily, a delicious smell hit my nostrils as I took in a deep breath of cool cave air, the spicy, earthy, aromatic scent beckoning me. Lips pursing, I let out my breath slowly, shuddering, and inhaled again, deeply.

  “Mmm.” A low moan slid past my throat and I flopped back, limp as a noodle, legs see-sawing restlessly as I writhed about on the floor. It was an instantaneous reaction, and I melted into a warm puddle of goo, right then and there.

  No idea how long I’d lain there before movement caught my eye, and I was swiftly scooped up into strong, hot arms. Peeking my eyes open a slit, I eyed the male carrying me. “You came back.”

  Not meeting my eyes, Troll grunted. “I did.”

  “Why?” Feeling oddly sanguine, maybe a little too lax and lethargic, my hands went straight for his neck as I rested my head on his thick shoulder, tracing the colorful patterns swirling along his rough but somehow soft, dark skin.

  He didn’t answer, but the odd, passive attitude whispering through me made it hard to get mad. Unable to help myself, I snuggled a bit closer. My squirming didn’t go unnoticed as Troll’s jaw flexed.