If You Fight (Corrupted Love Book 2)
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Looking up, I saw that sweetness I loved in him as he gazed down at me like all of this was perfectly normal for a man in love to deal with. “You shouldn’t have to, Ryder. I bet if you knew our life would be like this, you never would have let me into your room that night I came looking for you.”
Pressing his forehead to mine, he whispered, “I still would have.”
“So about that whole naked waiting for you thing. Give me a few seconds and I can make that come true.”
His hands drifted down my back to cup my ass before he gave it a gentle squeeze. “Just long enough for me to down some whisky and take the edge off the pain in my ribs. I’ll meet you in the bedroom.”
Before he turned to walk away, I stopped him and asked, “Are you sure you’re up to it? If you’re in pain, we can just relax tonight.”
Ryder grinned in that sexy way I knew meant he’d actually looked forward to coming home to see me naked in his bed. “I’m a red-blooded American male. Trust me. A few broken ribs aren’t going to stop me from pleasuring the woman I love. Even if my jaw was wired shut, I’d still be game to go down on you.”
“That sounds truly awful,” I said with a chuckle as the image of that ran through my head. “Nothing like looking down and seeing a man gritting his teeth near your lady bits.”
He ran his tongue along his lower lip and winked at me. “See? It could be much worse. Now get in there and get naked. I want to see you ready and waiting for me when I come in.”
“Oooh, I love it when you get all bossy with me.”
With his forefinger and thumb, he gripped my chin and tilted my head back to kiss me. “Good, and I’m starving for you, so I’m going to devour that beautiful pussy of yours.”
When he said things like that, a sweet ache formed inside me, like the mere description of what he’d do to me made me want him even more. I watched as he slowly walked toward the kitchen to get his drink and loved the way even when his body was racked with pain, he could still be so focused on me and my happiness.
Slipping out of my jeans and sweater, I placed them on the chair in the corner of the room and lay down. I wriggled out of my panties and bra, tossing them across the room to the same chair, and waited just as he’d ordered—naked and ready for him on his bed.
Ryder appeared in the doorway and smiled a grin so wicked I felt myself get wetter just looking at him. He’d removed his tie and unbuttoned the top two buttons on his black dress shirt, making him look so fucking sexy.
“You look beautiful there just waiting for me, like the perfect woman all for me,” he said in a low voice that hit me deep inside.
Slowly, he walked over to the bed, and I saw that intensity in his green eyes that never failed to make me feel desired. His gaze remained focused entirely on me, never wavering as he stared at my body like I was something to be worshipped.
“It seems unfair that I’m the only one undressed here,” I said as I reached out to tug him by the waist of his pants to bring him closer.
With a smirk, he shook his head. “Nope. Tonight I get to be spoiled by enjoying you completely.”
“I don’t think you’re the only one who gets to have a good time since you’ll be doing all the work.”
He slid his hand down between my breasts and shook his head. “Trust me. It’s not work to go down on you.”
My nipples tightened from his touch on my skin, sending waves of pleasure down my body straight to my pussy. It never failed to amaze me how hands so violent with others could give me so much happiness. Hard and rough, they had broken bones and bloodied people, but when they touched me, his hands brought me to sensual heights no other man’s ever could.
“We might have to make some adjustments tonight. My ribs are killing me,” Ryder said as he climbed onto the bed, grimacing in pain.
“How about instead of you down below me you can just lay there while I’m on top of you?”
He sat back on his heels and nodded. “Sounds pretty lazy for me, I know. Ordinarily, I wouldn’t need to, but they’re hurting like a son of a bitch tonight.”
I patted the sheets next to me. “Lie down and take it easy. You’re still doing all the work, so you won’t hear any complaints from me.”
Slowly, he lowered himself to the bed and looked over at me. “Don’t worry. I promise this won’t affect my performance, ma’am.”
“No worries here, but how about you stop referring to me like I’m your district manager?”
Ryder smiled at my joke. “Now that’s a job title. District manager of eating pussy. Eastern region.”
Kissing him lightly on the lips, I giggled. “Imagine that on a job application. How do you want me to do this? I don’t want to cause you any more pain, and I have a feeling if I move the wrong way, that’s exactly what’s going to happen.”
“Just don’t sit too far down on my chest. Don’t worry. If you get too close, I’ll push you up.”
I sat up and shook my head. “This might be the sexiest thing I’ve ever done.”
My sarcasm wasn’t lost on him. “Trust me. Once my mouth settles in and does its thing, you’re going to forget all about this preliminary stuff.”
In the most indelicate way ever, I flung my left leg over him and knelt above his face. Looking down, I tried to feel sexy instead of intensely awkward. “Interesting view, huh?”
His gaze traveled up between my legs and then my body to focus on my face. His hands cupped my ass, and smiling, he said, “It’s beautiful. Like a flower ready to bloom.”
“That’s so poetic, Ryder.”
He rolled his eyes. “I read it once. Now be quiet and let me work my magic.”
I pretended to zip my lip as he gently flicked his tongue over my clit. Waves of pleasure washed over me, and the feel of his fingers teasing the inside of my thighs, so close to where I craved his touch, made me roll my hips in the hope he’d give me what I craved.
My fingers tightened in his hair with every stroke of his tongue over my needy pussy, and when he sucked my clit between his lips, I tugged hard to keep him right on that spot. His mouth and how he used it on me felt sublime. If he stopped now, I’d beg him to give me more, willing to trade anything to keep his mouth on me.
“Oh, God…Ryder, that’s it…don’t stop…please, don’t stop…” I whimpered while his tongue focused on my pussy and he fucked me with his fingers, sliding one and then two inside me.
I looked down to see him smile as he stared up at me, watching my reaction to what he was doing to me. His mouth took me to the very edge and then eased me back as only he could do. Over and over, I watched him use his mouth so expertly, like he understood exactly what would give me the most pleasure and how to prolong it just by knowing my body as no one else did.
My release began to uncoil inside me, and I pulled hard on his hair. “I’m almost there. Oh, right there. That’s it,” I moaned as he sucked hard on my clit and pumped his fingers into me.
Seconds later, I felt the familiar, sweet sensation of my body surrendering to him. I rolled my hips and he held me tightly to his mouth, lapping up everything my pussy offered.
When I finished, I sagged against his chest, my hands barely able to hold me up as they clutched the headboard. Beneath me, he wore the expression of a conquering hero.
“You look completely satisfied with what you did there, you know that?” I said, looking down at him.
“There’s nothing like making a woman come so hard she rides your face like a bucking bronco,” he said, practically gloating.
“That’s a sexy image.” Lifting my leg, I eased it over his chest and sat down beside him. “I hope I looked better than some rodeo rider.”
He turned his head to face me and chuckled. “I didn’t see any fringe, so I think you definitely looked better than a rodeo rider.”
I kissed him, tasting myself on his lips, and cradled his face in my hands. “It’s not every man who can make a woman come like that and make references to fringe on rodeo costumes. You
’re truly a Renaissance man.”
“Your Renaissance man.”
“All mine. And I’m all yours,” I answered, never more sure I loved him as completely as I ever could love someone.
He remained quiet for a few minutes as I recovered from the pleasure he’d given me. Finally, he said, “I don’t want you to worry about what’s going to happen, Serena. I’m going to take care of everything. I promise.”
I trusted him more than anyone else in the world. He’d saved me more times than I deserved, and I knew he’d do everything in his power to ensure my safety.
But as much as he loved me, I worried he was no match for what my father would do.
“Just promise me whatever happens, you won’t give up on us.”
He winced like what I said hurt him. “I won’t ever give up on us, Serena. He can do whatever he wants. It won’t matter. As long as I’m breathing, I’m going to love you. That’s all there is to it.”
When he said things like that, I almost believed we’d be okay.
“I love you,” I whispered against his lips before kissing him again. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
He tucked my hair behind my ears and kissed me back. “You won’t ever have to know because I’m going to love you for the rest of my life.”
I placed my head on his shoulder, loving the feel of his strength beneath me. Like we used to when he first came to the estate, I closed my eyes and let myself drift off, knowing he was right beside me making sure nothing bad happened to me.
Chapter Fourteen
Serena
As winter settled in, bringing with it colder weather and longer nights, Ryder and I slowly let the rest of the world know we were a couple. Instead of hiding out in his apartment to be together, we took those walks he dreamed of, holding hands as we made our way through the garden or the streets of the city when we drove into Baltimore to shop or have dinner.
I had a feeling showing everyone we loved each other made him even happier than it made me. I was used to living in secret. I’d done it most of my life. But Ryder liked to be more upfront about what he cared about. Sneaking around had always made him miserable.
The reaction from the rest of my father’s men ranged from disinterest from the older ones to curiosity from the young guy named Jesse. Not that either of us cared what they thought.
My father at times appeared to seethe when he saw us together, but he never said a word about it after that day when he promised he’d never beat Ryder again. I didn’t pin all my hopes for happiness on that one statement, but as time went on and he didn’t retaliate against either of us, I wanted to believe things had gotten better.
Emboldened by this, I lay in Ryder’s arms as we slept in late on a Saturday morning and decided the time had come to find my mother. I knew my father would fight me on my choice, but I couldn’t continue to pretend to be all right knowing she was out there somewhere and might want to know me as much as I wanted to know her.
I stared up at the ceiling above Ryder’s bed and thought about what I’d say to her when I finally got to meet her after all these years. Would she be happy to see me? Would I be who she hoped I’d become or would she wish I was more like Janelle?
As these thoughts rambled around my head, Ryder nuzzled my neck and whispered, “You look a million miles away. You okay?”
I looked over at him and saw concern in his sleepy expression. “I’m fine. I was just thinking.”
He kissed me on the cheek and wrapped his arms around me to pull me close. “Okay. You want to tell me about it?”
“You know I want to find my mother, Ryder. I got some money from Oliver’s will, and I know you and I could use it toward us getting away from here, but it’s important to me that I finally see her. I want to hire a private detective to find her for me.”
My words were met with silence.
Turning toward him, I saw the drowsiness fade from his expression, replaced with concern. Was he upset I didn’t want to use the money to help us leave this place?
“I know you want us to leave here, and you’re right. I thought we could stay when my father agreed we could be together, but we should go. I just can’t continue knowing she’s out there and I can’t have a relationship her because my father wants to keep her from me. Or maybe it’s that he wants to keep me from her. I don’t know. I just know not having her in my life all these years has left a hole inside me that will never go away if I don’t try. Even though I’m blissfully happy with you, Ryder, there’s still that part of me that misses my mother.”
Shaking his head, he quietly said, “You don’t have to explain yourself to me. I’ve accepted that we probably won’t leave here. Robert’s been almost nice these past few weeks, so maybe we don’t have to.”
I hated hearing him sound so defeated. Cradling his face in my hands, I pressed a kiss to his lips and said, “Don’t say that. We will. I want that place you talk about in the mountains where it’s just the two of us. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life in this place like some kind of caged animal who’s allowed to roam freely as long as my owner knows exactly where I am and what I’m doing. I just don’t want to go on not knowing my mother.”
Ryder nodded and smiled. “You know, when you tell him, he’s going to fight you on this. Are you up to that?”
“I won the last round. Maybe I’ll win this one too.”
His eyebrows rose to show his disbelief. “You like to live dangerously, don’t you?”
“No. I just have a strong sense of justice, and his keeping my mother from Janelle and me all these years isn’t right.”
“Maybe not telling him until you’ve found her might be better?”
I thought about it and had to agree. Plus, if I told him before the private detective found her, he might do something to ensure I never found her. “Okay. That’s what we’ll do then. When I know where she is, we’ll tell him.”
“We?” he asked with a smile.
Pushing him onto his back, I lay my head on his shoulder. “Yes, we. This is about us, so we it is.”
He pressed a kiss onto the top of my head and whispered, “Okay, we. For now, I say we stay right here and enjoy a few more minutes of sleep.”
His arms holding me tightly to him grew slack, and I looked up to see he’d fallen back to sleep. But I couldn’t sleep because the very idea that sometime soon I’d see my mother made my mind race with thoughts about how wonderful it would be to once again be her daughter in more than just my dreams.
* * *
“Serena, I want you and Ryder to come down to my office.”
My father’s demand for us to join him on the very evening after I’d spoken to the private detective about finding my mother sent my mind into a tailspin. Had I mistakenly hired someone who knew my father, or even worse, worked for him? Had he told him my plans and now he intended to put a stop to them before I even had a chance to find out where she was?
As my hand holding the phone began to shake, I nervously asked, “Is something wrong?”
“Just be in my office in an hour. I assume you’re with him since he’s not at work, so that shouldn’t be a problem.”
I barely got the word okay out before he ended the call, leaving me wondering if all my plans had been dashed already. Setting my phone on the coffee table in front of me, I leaned back and took a deep breath before letting it out slowly as I tried to calm myself.
“I don’t have to ask who that was. He’s the only person in the world who can make you look that way.”
Forcing a smile, I turned to face Ryder next to me on the couch. “What way?”
“Terrified.”
And in a single word he encapsulated my entire life with my father. But I wasn’t that teenage girl who worried every time he called me into his office anymore. I’d stood up to him before, and if I had to, I’d do it again in an hour.
“He wants to see us in his office. We’ve been summoned.”
Now worry settled into Ry
der’s face, and he frowned. “Do you think he found out about you hiring someone to find your mother?”
“I don’t know, but I don’t care. He can be as angry as he wants. I just hope he doesn’t do something to make sure I can’t find her. That’s my only concern.”
Ryder nodded. “I wonder why he wants me there with you. That makes me think it’s about something else and not about you looking for your mother.”
What he said made sense. Heartened by the mere possibility that my secret hadn’t been revealed, I smiled and kissed him. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For always helping me see the bright side.”
Instead of smiling back at me, he knitted his eyebrows and I saw concern in his eyes. “Whatever he has to say to us, don’t worry because I’ll be right by your side. Nothing he does, no matter how bad it is, can hurt you with me there.”
Taking his hands in mine, I brought them to my lips in a kiss. “I know, and I can’t tell you how much I love you for that. I’m not afraid to go to see him with you there by my side.”
His expression lightened, and I finally got that smile in return. “Good. Maybe he’s going to tell us he’s decided to move in with his girlfriend and we can have the house all to ourselves.”
I laughed at his optimism, sure that wasn’t what my father wanted to see us about. But no matter what he wanted to say, we’d be fine because we had each other.
My father’s office seemed darker than usual as we walked in and sat down in those red leather chairs in front of his desk. He stared at me for a long moment and then turned his attention to Ryder, flashing one of those smiles that never failed to make my stomach twist into knots.
“You look good, son. I guess all those bones healed.”
“I’ve taken worse beatings before. You should know that,” Ryder said flatly.
“That I do.” My father stopped for a moment and then said, “So I guess Serena knows about what you used to do for me.”
Ryder simply nodded, but I felt the need to answer. “I know all about it, and it doesn’t change how I feel about him, if that’s what you’re getting at.”