“Phoebe, I really am sorry,” Xavier said again.
“So you should—”
I held up my hand to silence Beau and to stop Xavier from apologising again. “I’m going outside to get some fresh air. Xavier, can you please help me?”
Two gasps filled the air, but I was done with the arguments. More than anything, I needed space and peace of mind. I didn’t think I’d get any of the latter if I was worrying about the two of them trying to kill each other while they were alone.
Beau shot me a look that spoke of betrayal and disbelief, but I just spun on my heels to ignore it. I didn’t need to be left feeling guilty. I could only imagine how much worse things would have been had Xavier not come over when he did.
There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that I would’ve let Beau kiss me. I was a fucking idiot—falling for his tricks over and over. Letting him play his sick, twisted games with me.
Xavier trailed behind me, just like I’d asked him to, but the expression on his face was one of a lost puppy.
“Are you okay?” he asked after a moment. “I really am sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
I fell into his arms. “I’m the one who should be apologising. I let Beau get to me again and I shouldn’t have.”
“You were fixing to kiss him, weren’t you? I saw you two.”
I dropped my chin to my chest and rested my forehead against his shoulder. “I wish I could say you were wrong. He just . . . gets under my skin. I can’t stand it.”
“It’s because of that dress. If you were dressed more proper, he wouldn’t think he could take advantage.”
Unwilling to argue with him about it again, even though I really wanted to, I sighed. “I think we’re going to have to agree to disagree on that, Xav.”
Fists formed at his side and he stared at me. “We should leave.”
“No. We should stay. No doubt the tabloids will be worse tomorrow if I don’t at least try to make nice. Just make sure you stay by my side to look after me, ’kay?”
His arm wrapped protectively around my shoulders. “I’m not letting you go more than an arm’s length away.”
The rest of the night was relatively pain-free. Especially when Beau and Cassidee left a little after ten and I could just relax without worrying about being cornered by Beau, being questioned by Cassidee, or having Xavier attack Beau.
At midnight, Xavier wrapped me in his arms and kissed me. “I hope the rest of the year is just like this,” he whispered against my hair.
When he drove me home, he wanted to walk me up, but I insisted on leaving him in the car. After everything that had happened, I needed some time to think.
WHEN I WOKE on New Year’s day, I Skyped my family and spoke to everyone. Mum even put Nikki on her lap for a while—at least until Nikki screamed for me to pick her up, which ruined the mood a little. Still, it was everything I needed.
As we neared the end of the call, Dad ushered the kids out of the room and left Mum and me on the phone.
“Did you see the latest headlines?”
I buried my head in my hands. I could only imagine. The bruise on my shoulder from where Xavier’s fist had connected with me was already a deep purple. If any paps had caught the confrontation on camera, or even if one of the journalists in the room had been fast enough to pull out their phone to snap a photo, it would have made headlines. Even though there wouldn’t have been any solid fact, the tension between Cassidee, Beau, Xavier, and me would have been evident. “Hit me with it.”
She frowned. “It’s not funny, Phoebe.”
I crossed my arms and looked away, unable to take the judgement on her face. “Do you see me laughing?”
“This is fast turning into a PR nightmare.”
I buried my head in my hands, running my fingers into my hair and clutching the strands. “I know. I’m not doing anything deliberately.” Tears welled in my eyes. “I don’t know why he can’t just leave me alone.”
“Is he harassing you?”
When I glanced back at my computer screen, I could see Mum’s cogs turning with potential ways to spin my situation. It would have been so easy to nod and say it was all Beau’s fault. That he was causing dramas I couldn’t handle.
But I couldn’t. It wasn’t only him. I’d made the choice to speak to Cassidee. I’d turned back around to Beau when he’d spoken to me. I could have chosen to walk away.
“No, he’s not,” I said. “At least, it’s nothing I can’t handle.”
“They’re calling you a homewrecker. Trying to suggest you were behind troubles that Beau and his fiancée had in July.”
I shrugged. “I guess they’re not really wrong, are they?”
“Maybe we need to book you and Beau into some sort of therapy program,” she mused, mostly to herself.
“No, Mum. Just no. I’m handling it. I promise.”
“You already promised there’d be no more headlines.”
“I know.” I played with the ends of my hair. “And I’m working on it. I really am. Can we just give it a month? If things aren’t any better, I promise I’ll look into anything you believe will be beneficial.”
“Okay, Pheebs.” She gave me a warm smile, although an undercurrent of sorrow was still present in her gaze. “I think we can give you that.”
“Thank you, Mum.”
“Also, your Dad has organised to have Angel’s hire car delivered to Richards Racing on Monday. You’re to take your bike there and swap to the car for the next few months. He doesn’t want you riding on icy roads on your bike.”
Even though it was something Nana had warned me about and Angel had mentioned, I wasn’t happy. Then again, with how much trouble I was already in for the shit going down with Beau, I needed to toe the line. “But—”
“No buts, Phoebe. This is a new requirement of us leaving you there to do your thing.”
“Fine.”
“You can swap back over in spring, when it starts to get warmer.”
“That’s a long time to hire a car for. Must be expensive.”
She shook her head and leaned forward conspiratorially. “Do you really think your dad cares how much something costs when it comes to your safety or health? Do you think I do? We got a good deal on a long-term hire, so don’t worry about that. Just please do this for our sanity, okay?”
“Sure.”
“I have another surprise for you.”
I resisted the urge to roll my eyes and ask what now. “Yeah?”
“Someone turned up on our doorstep yesterday because she wanted to have a New Year’s with family. She’s staying in your room.”
I frowned. “Who is it?”
Mum looked over the screen at someone behind the computer and grinned. “Why don’t you see for yourself?”
There was a jumble of conversation I could barely make out, and a moment later a blonde goddess with emerald eyes filled the screen.
“God, it’s been too long since I had to look at your ugly mug,” she said. “I missed you.”
“Angel! I see you’re as bottle blonde as ever.”
“What’s happening over there?”
I spoke to her about everything that was going down, telling her about all the run-ins I’d had with Beau.
“Sounds like you’ve still got it bad for the cowboy.”
I buried my head in my hands. “Of course I do. The worst thing is, he’s started to pursue me again. It’s so hard to say no when my body is screaming yes, but I’m not going to get involved in that sort of situation. I’m not going to be the other woman.” I was about to add something more when the buzzer went off to tell me someone wanted in. “Hold that thought, Angel. I’ll be right back.”
Even as she asked whether I was expecting company, I moved to the intercom. “Hello?”
“I wanted to check that you’re okay.” It was Xavier. “You didn’t answer your phone so I drove straight over.”
“I’m okay. I’ve just been on the computer talking to my family, so I have
n’t looked at my phone.”
“Can I come up?”
I didn’t really have a valid reason for telling him no. “Yeah, sure. Just let yourself in when you get up because I’m still talking to Angel.”
After unlocking my front door, I grabbed a quick drink and then headed back to my computer.
“Who was it?” Angel asked.
“Xavier.”
A frown crossed her brow. “Are you not happy to be seeing him?”
I blinked and tried to straighten out my expression. What look was I wearing that gave her that impression? “No. I mean of course I am. I just—”
I cut myself off because Xavier walked into the room. He moved straight over to me and kissed my mouth, not caring that I was on Skype with Angel.
“How’s the shoulder?” he asked, wincing as he pushed away the material covering my discoloured skin. His fingers traced the outline. “I really am sorry.”
I grabbed his hand and drew it to my lips. “Don’t, Xavier, there’s really nothing to be sorry for.”
Ever the subtle one, Angel cleared her throat to get my attention.
“Oh, sorry,” I muttered before introducing Angel and Xavier.
“So you’re the infamous best friend,” Xavier said. His smile wasn’t as warm as it usually was, but I couldn’t figure why.
“And you must be Xavier. I hope you’re treating my girl well, because if you’re not I’ll come over there and kick your arse.”
“Don’t worry about Angel, she threatens physical violence against all my boyfriends,” I explained. It wasn’t exactly true. I’d never really had too many serious boyfriends for her to threaten. I just didn’t want Xavier to think she was actually threatening him.
“I don’t blame her,” Xavier said to me, all but turning his back on Angel as he ran his fingers over my hair. “I feel very protective of you too, and I haven’t known you nearly as long.” He kissed the top of my head. “I’d go crazy if someone hurt you.”
“It’s nice meeting you and all,” Angel said. “But I don’t suppose you’d mind giving Phoebe and me a few minutes to chat and say our goodbyes in private?”
“Angel! There’s no need to be rude.”
She narrowed her eyes at me, and I glared at her in response. Xavier waited for me to answer one way or the other.
“Xavier, I’ll just be a minute.”
His eyes pinched together and his smile turned into a frown. “I’ll wait here, I guess.”
I picked up my laptop and carried it to my bedroom, shutting the door behind me.
“What was that about?” I demanded.
“Did he do that to you?” she asked in retort, nodding toward my shoulder. Her face indicated that I better not try to bullshit her—not that I planned to because there was nothing to hide.
“Not intentionally, my Angel. I just got in the way when he tried to hit Beau.”
“Explain.”
I ran through the night before, from Cassidee leading me aside, to the disagreement with Beau and Xavier, and then the strike to my shoulder.
“You’re sure he’s not hurting you?”
“Thanks for the concern, but he’s really not. In fact, I’m not sure how I would have made it through the last month without him keeping me sane.”
“So are you guys . . .” She trailed off, but I knew what she meant.
“No, he comes from an overly conservative family. No sex before marriage, and he seems pretty set on sticking to that.”
“You don’t sound overly worried about it?”
“It is what it is.”
“Do you love him?”
I met her eye and lifted one shoulder in a half shrug. “I think so.”
She frowned and leaned closer to the camera. “You think so?”
“Well, we haven’t been dating that long. I barely know him really. We’re still getting to know each other.”
“Uh-huh.” She was thoroughly unconvinced and I knew why. When I’d returned from the States the last time, I’d known without doubt that I loved Beau.
“It’s complicated, Angel, but I think it’s a different sort of love. A safer sort of love.”
“Since when did my girl settle for what was safe?”
I tucked my chin into my chest and sighed. “Since I got hurt following my heart.”
“God, I wish I could hug you right now.”
“Me too. But that’s enough about me. What are you doing at Mum and Dad’s?”
“I got home yesterday afternoon and Mum was practically comatose on the drink. You know it’s always harder for her at this time of the year. But anyway, I couldn’t deal with it. Not without you around to help take my mind off it—”
“I’m sorry I’m over here when you need me.”
“It’s okay. I called an ambulance, and then your mum. She really is cool. I know where you get it from. She insisted I take your place at their New Year’s celebration. Said it might help us all miss you a little less.”
The pangs of homesickness I had from time to time grew stronger than ever listening to her talk about our New Year’s celebrations. It was almost as big a night in our house as Christmas.
“It didn’t really work. Mostly, we just sat around telling stories about you.” She laughed. “Max is here at the moment too. He’s been at my side pretty constantly.”
A laugh left me. “I bet. Just don’t leave any promotional photos lying around, or he might make use of them.” I waggled my eyebrows.
“You’re a sicko, Reede.”
“Just telling it like it is. Are you going to be staying at home for long?”
“Just until Mum gets out of the hospital again, I guess. Then I should probably make sure she’s got some food. I’ve got a few shoots lined up after that, so she’ll be on her own again for a while.”
Telling her she didn’t need to take care of her mum would have been like telling me I didn’t need to ride my bike. “I’m sure Mum and Dad will let you stay as long as you need. Or as long as you want.”
“I know. They’ve already told me that. Like I said, your parents are pretty cool.”
“You’re part of the family, Angel. That’s forever.” It was only then I realised we’d chatted for a while; time always got away with me when talking to her. “I should probably get back to my guest.”
She gave me a watery smile. “Have fun with that.” Then she chuckled. “Well, I guess you won’t have too much fun.”
“Funny.”
“Love you.”
“You too,” I said before disconnecting the call. As I shut the screen, I just sat and processed the ache in my chest. I missed them all. And I’d barely made it a few months into my trip. How was I going to survive until the end of the year?
After allowing myself a few moments to stow away the homesickness, I headed out into the living room.
“Sorry about that,” I said before Xavier even knew I was behind him.
“What’s going on, Phoebe?” he asked. His voice was icy.
“With what?”
“When we started dating, I set up a Google alert for your name, and this came up overnight.” He held out his phone showing me one of the headlines Mum had mentioned during our conversation. One that accused me of attempting to be a homewrecker. That hinted at tension between Beau and Cassidee at the function, and mentioned my presence as the reason for the tension.
“It’s part and parcel of public life, that’s what it is.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means that some outlets will make up anything they think will sell. It doesn’t even matter if there’s any truth in the rumours.”
“Is there any truth to them?”
I grabbed the phone off him, locked the screen, and rested it on the back of the sofa. Then I took his face between my hands and touched my lips to his. “No. There’s not. I’m happy with this. With us. I don’t want Beau.” There was as much truth to the statement as there was lie.
He wrapped his
arms around my waist. “Am I being silly?”
I held up my forefinger and thumb to tell him he was, a little bit.
“What are your plans for the rest of the day?” he asked as I rested my head on his chest. “Wanna go catch a movie?”
I pulled away from him. “Only if we can see that racing one that’s just come out.”
He chuckled. “I wouldn’t dream of taking you to see anything else.”
“Sure thing then. Let me go grab my stuff.”
I had my coat in my hand and my bag strung over my wrist when my phone rang. Xavier grabbed all my stuff from me to allow me to answer it. When I saw the name though, I refused to answer the call.
“Who is it?” Xavier frowned as he asked the question.
“It’s no one.”
“Phoebe.” His voice was almost a growl.
“Okay, I’ll make myself clearer. It’s no one I want to talk to.”
“Is it Beau?”
I shoved my phone back in my pocket and reached for my coat. “Can we just leave it and go to the movies?”
“He needs to learn to back off.”
“Agreed. But I won’t let it ruin our date.”
Xavier smiled as he took my hand, but there was a cold hard gleam in his eyes that made me not want to bring up the topic of Beau around him ever again.
THE DAYS OF January rolled past in a blur of dates with Xavier. There were times when it felt more like a high school romance than anything serious. We held hands. We kissed. He never pushed for anything more, and I never longed for it. But it was nice. Pleasant.
Because he was one of the few people I knew in the States, and knew I could trust, I gave him the spare key to my apartment. It meant he could come and go as he wanted, which helped to ease some of the concerns he had over Beau.
At work, things were getting more serious with more and more customisation and training in the car. It all gave me something to focus on aside from Beau and his fiancée’s ever-expanding waistline. He was more watchful than ever despite her drawing ever closer to her due date—or maybe because of it. Any time I was within a few feet of him, I could feel his gaze on me.
Once he came up behind me while I was talking to Dad on the phone.
Phobic (Phoebe Reede: The Untold Story #2) Page 19
