Bound by Song (Cauld Ane Series)

by Tracey Jane Jackson

  Grace giggled. “Well, don’t buy the door plaque just yet.”

  “Oh, I did a month ago.” Niall grinned. “If you decide you want to go home, I’ll help you deal with my brother.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  Niall hugged her again. “Go get ready for the ball. Save me a dance, okay?”

  “Okay,” Grace promised, and headed to her room.

  She arrived to find a garment bag on her bed. Zipping it open, she found a stunning red gown inside and had to force back tears. Max had obviously taken great care in choosing it for her.

  Of course I did. I love you. Whether you choose to believe that or not.

  Baby, I know you love me. That’s never been in question.

  “Then what has?” he asked.

  She faced him, once again surprised at how he had the ability to sneak up on her. He crossed his arms and leaned against the bureau, still in his kilt, still gorgeous.

  He smiled and she shook her head. “Stop it,” she ordered.

  “No, I don’t think I will. You finding me gorgeous is to my advantage.” He cocked his head. “So, what’s the question, love?”

  “The question is whether or not you’ll trust me enough to show me every part of you.”

  “None of this is about trust, Grace. It’s about protecting you.”

  “Bullshit.”

  He frowned. “Grace.”

  “What? You said I have the ability to call bullshit, bullshit, so guess what? I call bullshit.”

  Max laughed.

  “What’s so funny?” she demanded.

  “I think that’s the first time I’ve ever heard you swear.”

  “You’re probably right. I don’t swear often. We used to get in a lot of trouble if we did.” Grace sighed. “But, it kind of felt good, to be honest.”

  Max laughed again and stroked her cheek. “Do you know something else that feels good?” He leaned down and kissed her.

  Grace grasped the lapels of his formal jacket, allowing the moment to overtake her. The buzzing of her phone dragged her from her fantasy and she broke the kiss to answer it.

  “Hello?”

  “Gracie,” her mother rasped.

  “Mom? Is everything okay?”

  “No, honey, it’s not.”

  Grace wrapped an arm around her stomach. “Is it Maggie?”

  “Yes. I really didn’t want to tell you this over the phone, but your sister’s sick. Very, very sick. She doesn’t have the flu, honey, she has cancer.”

  Grace’s knees buckled, but Max caught her, kneeling beside her as Grace dropped her phone and burst into tears. She vaguely registered Max picking up her phone and speaking to her mother, but for the most part, the next several minutes were a blur.

  Max gathered her in his arms and pulled her onto his lap, and Grace curled up against his chest and sobbed. Max stroked her hair, holding her in silence until she was able to catch her breath. “I have to go home,” she said.

  “I’ll come with you.”

  She shook her head. “No. I would like to be alone.”

  “Grace. I’m not allowing you to go through this by yourself, love.”

  “Okay.”

  He gave her a gentle squeeze. “I thought I was going to have to fight you on this.”

  “I would if I was smarter, but I don’t think I can do this without you.” She sat up. “Especially since Charlie’s so far away.”

  “Come on, love, I’ll get the plane sorted.” He stood with her in his arms, and it wasn’t lost on her how strong he was.

  “Don’t you need to be at the ball?”

  He shook his head and smiled. “Kade and Samantha will understand. You pack and I’ll call Kenna.”

  He set her down, and Grace grabbed her suitcase.

  * * *

  The next day, an exhausted Grace sat with her family at the kitchen table and tried to process the information being discussed. She’d asked Max to give her some space, and he’d reluctantly agreed, however, she didn’t try to block him and honestly, appreciated the comfort knowing he was close.

  “What exactly is Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia?” Spencer asked.

  Their mother opened one of the pamphlets the doctor had given her. “It’s a cancer that starts from white blood cells called lymphocytes in the bone marrow.”

  Grace bit her lip. It explained Maggie’s weakness, the pain in her once broken arm, the weird pins of red under her skin from bleeding, and her disinterest in eating. If there was something Maggie enjoyed more than most things, it was food.

  “Does that mean we can donate our marrow?” Spencer asked.

  “Yes,” their mother said.

  Grace looked at her father. Big mistake. He could barely speak, his face wracked with grief. She felt Max stir in her mind, but was glad he didn’t speak.

  “So what now?” Spencer asked.

  “Chemo,” their mother said. “And while she’s doing chemo, you can get tested, and they’ll also look for a bone marrow match.”

  “What about alternative treatments?” Grace asked. “And how much is all of this going to cost?”

  “You don’t need to worry about any of that,” her father said. “Your mother and I will take care of it.”

  “Am I going to lose my hair?” Maggie asked, her voice small and shaky.

  “Probably,” their mother said.

  “But I’m feeling better,” Maggie argued. “The antibiotics are working. They must have made a mistake. They read the blood wrong.”

  “They tested it three times, honey.”

  “I think we should get a second opinion.”

  Their father patted her hand. “And we will, sweetheart, but for now, you should rest.”

  Their mother nodded. “I agree. I think you should go back to bed, Magpie. I’ll bring you some soup in a little while.”

  “Come on, Maggie,” Grace said, and pushed her chair from the table. “I’ll come up with you.”

  “Are you going to see Max later?” Maggie asked, rising to her feet.

  Grace took Maggie’s arm and led her to the stairs. “I don’t think so.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because this is family time,” Grace explained.

  “But he’s family.”

  “Maggie,” she said, helping her sisters up the stairs.

  “I don’t understand why you’re so weird about him all of a sudden.”

  “It’s complicated.”

  “I like him, Gracie. Don’t screw it up.”

  “Maggie,” she said with a sigh.

  “Seriously,” Maggie pressed as she pushed open her bedroom door. “He’s perfect for you.”

  “You’re just saying that because you’ve been in love with him forever.”

  “I’m not. Honest. You’re just too stubborn to see it.” Maggie climbed under her covers. “Don’t let him go.”

  “We’ll see,” Grace said, suddenly far too tired to think. “Get some rest. I love you, sissy.”

  “Love you too.”

  Grace closed her sister’s door and walked next door to her room. Lowering herself onto her bed, she burst into tears, the weight of the reality crushing her. Her sister was more than likely going to die and there wasn’t a damn thing she could do about it.

  Grace, let me come to you.

  No, Max. I just need to be alone right now. Please.

  I love you.

  I know. Grace lay down and let her exhaustion overtake her.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  THE NEXT DAY, Grace paced the hospital waiting room while Maggie was in radiology. Maggie had tripped and fallen that morning, and the doctors thought she may have broken her foot.

  Grace’s phone buzzed…again. Max had been calling non-stop all day, not to mention the frequent visits to her dreams the night before, but Grace wasn’t in the frame of mind to face her feelings for him and deal with her despair over Maggie’s cancer at the same time. She’d tried to explain that to him earlier, that this
was all entirely too much for her and she needed a break.

  She stepped up to the nurses’ station and forced a smile. “Do you have any idea how much longer my sister will be?”

  The nurse shook her head. “Sorry, hun, I don’t. But she’s just getting an x-ray, so I can’t imagine it’ll be much longer. Would you like me to call down there for you?”

  “Grace!”

  Grace turned to see Max walking toward her. He wore dark jeans and a tight, light blue V-neck T-shirt. He couldn’t have been better looking if he’d tried. Her heart sped up and she tried to take a deep breath, but found herself unable to.

  She turned back to the nurse. “I’ll just wait. Thank you.”

  “Sure thing,” she said, eyeing Max like he was a giant candy bar.

  Grace forced herself not to scowl at the woman and made her way to Max, who wrapped her in a tight embrace. “Why aren’t you answering your phone?”

  “What are you doing here?” Grace asked. “How did you find me? I’ve been trying to block you all day.”

  “That doesn’t matter right now,” he said, and loosened his hold. “Why haven’t you answered your phone or texts?” He tapped his temple. “Or responded.”

  Grace tried to ignore her comfort in his arms and pulled away. “Max, I have a lot on my mind. Maggie fell and they’re x-raying her foot to see if it’s broken, her chemo starts next week, and I need to find another job. You have no shows coming up, and since I can’t work in the Scotland office, I can’t take your money. I can’t deal with all of that and you as well.”

  He slipped his hands into his pockets. “You never have to work again, Grace, regardless of if you work for me or not, so don’t bother looking for a job.”

  “I can’t let you ‘take care’ of me, Max. It wouldn’t be right.”

  She watched his face harden. “I am not having this argument with you again, Grace. It is my right and my responsibility to make sure you never want for anything, and nothing you say will change that.”

  She let out a growl of frustration. “It’s always all about you! You don’t care about what I want, do you? As long as you get to play the big strong man who rescues the heroine in distress. I need a break, Max. I can’t do this anymore.”

  “What the hell is that supposed to mean?” he ground out.

  “I’m done. With you, with me, with all of this.” She waved her hand in the air.

  Before he could respond, Maggie appeared, sitting in a wheelchair being pushed by a hospital volunteer, while their mother followed.

  Grace rushed to her sister. “What did they say?”

  “It’s broken. I have to get it cast,” Maggie grumbled.

  “They’re taking her now,” her mom said, and caught sight of Max just as Maggie glanced over Grace’s shoulder, her face brightening.

  “Max? What are you doing here?” Maggie asked.

  Grace squeezed her eyes shut in an effort not to react. She felt Max’s hand settle on her lower back and cursed her body for relaxing against it.

  “I came to see how you were, lass,” Max said, releasing Grace and hunkering down next to Maggie. “You said you fell.”

  “She said?” Grace asked, and realized how Max knew where she was. Maggie had obviously saved his number in her contacts list.

  “Yeah, I slipped on the stairs and broke my stupid foot. But I’m okay. I just wanted you to know… well, you know.”

  Max nodded. “I know, lass, and I appreciate it.”

  “Did you know I start chemo next week?” Maggie whispered.

  “Yes. I heard.”

  “I’m super excited about that. You know, losing your hair, puking your guts out and stuff,” she droned.

  “Hair grows back, and the rest doesn’t last long.” Max squeezed her hand. “I have a feeling you’ll manage beautifully.”

  “Margaret Wilson,” a nurse called.

  “Here,” Maggie said, and smiled at Max. “Thanks for coming, Max. That was really sweet.” She glanced up at their mother. “Will you come with me, Mom?”

  “Of course, sweetheart.”

  “Do you want me to come too?” Grace asked.

  “No, it’s fine. I’ll see you at home later,” Maggie said. “Thanks for bringing me. Mom can take me home.”

  Max kissed Maggie’s cheek, and the volunteer wheeled her away, leaving Grace alone with him again. He took her hand and lifted it to his lips. “Let me take you home, love. We can talk while we drive.”

  “No. It’s fine. I have my car. I can get home on my own.”

  “Bruce is with me. I’ll drive your car.”

  “No, Max,” she stressed.

  “You’re upset, Grace. I’d rather you not drive like that.”

  “You don’t really have any say in it.” She yanked her hand from his. “I’m perfectly fine to drive.”

  He crossed his arms. “I’ll follow you, then, and we can talk at your house.”

  “I can’t.” She felt the prick of tears. “Please, Max. I need some space.”

  “Grace, don’t do this. Let me help.”

  “You can’t help,” she rasped. “Not in the way I need.”

  “Tell me what you need, love. I’ll do whatever you want.”

  She shook her head. “I don’t want to tell you what to do, Max.”

  “Give me something, Grace.” He dragged his hands down his face. “I can’t stand to see you this way and if you’d let me, I can help.”

  Grace took a deep breath. “I know you’re at a loss, Max. But right now, I can’t put my thoughts and feelings into a cohesive sentence, let alone guide you in how you should respond. You confuse me. I love you, but this isn’t healthy. For either one of us. It’s better that we just walk away now before it becomes impossible.”

  With a strength and determination she didn’t feel, she turned and left him standing in the hospital corridor. The guilt weighing her down like an anchor. But she wouldn’t buckle. She had to distance herself from the overwhelming feelings she had for him.

  * * *

  Max followed her from the building, albeit at a distance. He knew she was dealing with more than she felt she could handle, and he was concerned she was spiraling toward depression. He pulled out his phone and called the only person he thought might be able to get into the psyche of his mate. He shook his head as the call connected. What the hell was he doing?

  * * *

  Grace arrived home to find a familiar Toyota in front of her house. She jumped from the car and rushed inside. “Chuck?”

  “Kitchen,” her best friend called.

  Grace dashed into the kitchen and into the familiar arms of Charlotte, bursting into tears. “What are you doing here?”

  “Spencer let me in on his way out.”

  Grace shook her head. “I mean, here, instead of California.”

  “Oh, right.” Charlotte grinned. “I quit.”

  Grace pulled away, her mouth dropping open. “What? You quit Disneyland?”

  Charlotte nodded.

  “Why?”

  “Because you need me more. I have some money saved up, and nothing was happening in L.A. anyway, so I decided to come up here for a little while. I missed the weather, I missed my family, and I missed you. So, I’m back. I have a couple of auditions in Portland next week already. Including one for Grimm.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Yep.”

  Grace smiled through her tears and hugged Charlotte again. “You have no idea how glad I am you’re here.”

  Charlotte released Grace and opened the refrigerator, making herself at home as though she’d never left. “Let’s have some cookies and milk and you can tell me how Maggie’s doing.”

  “Well, she fell this morning and broke her foot, which with the cancer, just adds insult to injury.”

  “Is she okay?” Charlotte pulled out the milk carton and grabbed glasses.

  Grace walked into the pantry for the cookies. “I think a cast will take care of the foot. I just wish the can
cer was so easily fixed.”

  “I’m sorry, buddy. What’s going on with Max?”