Love's Sweet Surrender

by Love's Sweet Surrender (lit)

  “I’m not sure as of yet, ma’am, and I want to make sure I have a place to lay my head tonight.”

  “Of course, my dear. You can have the room at the top of the stairs to the right. I’ll even have my nephew bring up some water for a bath. I’m sure you are exhausted after traveling clear from Boston.”

  “Yes, ma’am. I sure could do with a bath right now. Thank you. I’m sorry, what was your name again?”

  “I’m Madge Roberts, but you can just call me Madge.”

  “Thank you, Madge. You’ve been a godsend.” Lily smiled in return for Madge's kindness. She wearily took the stairs to the room the woman had referred to, anticipating the warm bath that would soothe her tired muscles.

  * * * *

  Listening closely while the two women talked, Daniel Roberts stood outside the door. It couldn’t be her. Damn! If she realizes who I am, there will be hell to pay.

  He needed to make sure she didn’t recognize him from the train. He didn’t think that she had gotten a good enough look at him, but he wasn’t sure. The jail would find him a permanent resident if it became known he was involved in the robberies that had taken place. He didn’t want to eliminate her if he didn’t have to.

  After all, she was a pretty little thing, with her big green eyes and dark brown hair. She was rather tall for a female he'd noticed, when he held her against his chest. She was about four inches shorter than he, and he stood almost six feet in height. His body began to react to his thoughts as he remembered her tight little butt pressed against him. He wondered for a second what it would be like to have her beneath him.

  Shaking his head at his amorous thoughts, he waited until the young woman disappeared up the stairs before he made his presence known. His Aunt Madge had been such a loving influence in his life since his parents had died, but he needed—no wanted—money, lots of money, and she was only able to support them with the boarding house.

  “Aunt Madge?”

  “In here,” she called. He entered the kitchen to find her standing near the counter. “I’m just making our newest guest something to eat. I’m sure she’s starving. I need you to take the tub to her room so she can have a nice bath.”

  Son of a bitch! If she sees me, she might recognize me. “You want me to do what?"

  Chapter Two

  Johnny arrived with her trunks, struggling to haul them up to the second floor, and Lily had to smile when she heard him banging up the stairs. She opened the door when he reached the landing and stopped to catch his breath.

  She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek, placing the promised nickel into his hand after he had pulled the heavy trunks into her room. “Thank you so much, Johnny. You’ve been so sweet.”

  Color splashed across his cheeks, and he ducked his head. “Yes, ma’am. Thank you, ma’am.” He turned on his heel and almost ran down the stairs again.

  She moved the trunk to a spot near the end of the bed, so she could get some clean clothing, eagerly waiting for the hot water for her bath. Sorting through her things looking for some undergarments, she dropped the clothing on the bed when she heard a loud knock. The sound came again, shortly after the first, and she ground her teeth together in annoyance.

  “I’m coming,” she insisted, a little exasperated at the insistent rapping.

  She pulled the door open to find a man standing with what appeared to be a large tub behind him. “Yes?”

  “I brought the tub, miss,” he mumbled, looking at the young woman before him with a startled expression.

  “Oh, yes, please come in. You can put it over there near the bureau.” She stepped aside to allow the man to enter.

  The man struggled with the large tub, pushing and pulling, until it was where she had shown him. “I’ll be right back with the water, miss.”

  “Thank you.” She frowned when he quickly left the room. Strange.

  After the man made several trips back with buckets of steaming liquid, the edge of the water rode precariously close to the top rim of the tub.

  “That should do it. Just let my aunt know when you are finished, and I’ll come up to empty it,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

  “Of course. Thank you so much.” Once the door closed behind him, she quickly stripped her clothes and stepped into the steaming water with a heavy sigh.

  Lily thoroughly washed her hair, leaving bubbles floating in the water around her. Once she'd finished washing up, she reclined against the edge of the tub and attempted to relax. It had been a long trip from Boston, but it made her happy to be finally here. Now she had to figure out how to convince the mayor and the rest of the town that she was capable of teaching their children. She had always loved tutoring some of the local aristocrats’ boys and girls during her teenage years. She hoped this love of teaching would help her win the battle to keep her job.

  Edward, the man she had known as her father, hated it when she taught. He always felt it beneath her and made sure she knew it. “You needn’t do that type of menial labor, Lily,” he would tell her. As the daughter of a wealthy Boston family, she should have been "knitting and doing needlepoint with the other young ladies, rather than helping children with mathematics and English." Nevertheless it was something she had a talent for, so she continued, much to his chagrin.

  Kathleen, the woman Lily had called mother, understood and encouraged her, even helping her at times. She’d called Lily a nurturer on several occasions. She told Lily often that she was proud of her, but she also warned her to be careful, otherwise she might get her heart broken in the process. Lily wondered if Kathleen thought she would get too attached to the children.

  Tears welled up in her eyes when she thought about her family, or the family she had believed to be hers until recently. The nightmare in her life had unfolded not long ago when she found out she wasn’t a Backman after all.

  * * * *

  The afternoon sunlight filtered through the gauze curtains on the window as her father prepared for his business meeting.

  “Lily, can you fetch me the papers in my study for the Hoover account? I need them for my meeting.”

  “Of course, father.”

  She had taken over the accounting for his business when he caught his accountant skimming profits the previous fall, and she loved it. The business fascinated her, and her father encouraged her involvement although her fiancé hadn't. Several arguments had ensued with Arthur over her "working".

  "As my wife, you will not work outside of the home. You will tend to the staff, have my children and be my hostess. Those will be your only responsibilities." She shook her head when she thought of his words from the night before while she stood at her father’s desk, the strong box in front of her. However am I going to get Arthur to understand my need to feel useful and not just be the token wife on his arm?

  She sighed and opened the lid to retrieve the paperwork her father had requested. A faded, yellow paper scroll tied with a pink ribbon caught her eye, and she reached inside with shaky fingers. She chewed on her bottom lip for a moment before pulling off the ribbon and unrolling the paper. The worn parchment crackled in her hands.

  “Born this day, April 23, 1861, a daughter, Lillian Elizabeth Flannery, to Robert and Elizabeth Flannery in this great city of Boston, Massachusetts,” it read.

  Reclining in the warm water in Parkville, Texas, she recalled how she had stood in complete silence behind his desk. Her hands trembled so hard, she almost didn't have the strength to continue to stand as she looked at the birth record for what seemed like hours.

  The next thing she remembered was her father's voice, "Lily, sweetheart. I can explain."

  She lifted her eyes from the yellow sheet to stare at the man she had called father for so many years.

  He dropped into the chair across from her, his hands on his knees and fear in his eyes. “Lily,” he started again as the tears began to roll down her cheeks.

  “You aren’t my father at all, are you? Just who are you? And Mother? She’s n
ot my mother either?”

  A moment later, Kathleen stood in the doorway. “Lily. Sweetheart, please let us explain.”

  “All this time I thought you were my parents, when all along it was a charade!” Her heart beat wildly in her chest. “How could you keep this from me? Where are my real parents?”

  “Lillian!” Kathleen demanded, moving closer to Lily, claiming her hysteria. “Please listen to us so we can explain. We did what was best for you, and we are not ashamed. We love you with all our hearts, and that will never change, no matter that you are not of our blood. Now, please sit down so we can tell you what happened to bring you to us.”

  With her legs unable to hold her any longer, she sank down in the chair behind her, while Kathleen took a seat near Edward on the other side of the desk.

  Tears welled up in Edward's eyes when he started to speak. The story unfolded in her mind with each word, but all she could focus on was the fact that her real mother didn't want her.

  “Where is she now? My mother.”

  “She left Boston a few weeks after you came to live with us permanently. She wrote a few times from somewhere in California, but after that, the letters stopped. We don’t know where she is now.”

  “We love you, and we have cared for you as if you were our own. That will not change even though I did not give birth to you.”

  “I am not angry you are not my blood parents. I’m angry because you did not tell me this sooner. I am twenty-two years old, and you’ve kept this from me the whole time. How could you think that this would change my feelings for you?” Lily focused on the two people across the desk.

  “I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I should have listened to your mother long ago when she wanted to tell you, but I was stubborn. I was afraid, afraid you would have hard feelings toward us, or would want to go off and find your natural mother. I’m just a stubborn old fool,” Edward said, lowering his eyes and resting his head in his hands.

  Lily immediately stood, rounded the desk and knelt at their feet. “You have raised me as your own. I do love you, and that will never change."

  Forgiving Edward and Kathleen had come easy, but she couldn't forgive Arthur for turning his back on her and calling off their engagement.

  The next afternoon when he had come to call, she had taken his hand and told him she needed to tell him something.

  "What is it, my love? If there is a problem, we'll work it out together."

  The strength of his arms around her waist while she stared out the window gave her the courage she needed to tell him the truth. What she hadn't been prepared for was his reaction.

  "Edward and Kathleen are not your parents?" His arms dropped from around her, and he stepped back.

  A sigh left her lips in a rush of air, and she turned to face him. "Apparently not."

  "Who are your parents then?"

  "A couple with the last name of Flannery."

  "Irish? Irish immigrants?"

  "That is what it would appear although I don't have the particulars. Edward said my father worked at the shipyard but died in an accident. My real parents had become friends with the Backmans. When my father died, they took in my mother and helped her until my birth. My real mother left soon afterward and gave me to Edward and Kathleen to raise." The stunned look on Arthur's face sent her heart racing in her chest, and she stepped toward him. "Arthur? Is there something wrong?"

  His gaze ricocheted around the room as if he were searching for something. "I forgot I had a meeting this afternoon, Lily. I will see you later."

  "Oh. All right then." She laid her hand on his chest and tipped her face up for a kiss, but when one didn't come, trepidation rippled down her back. He moved away from her, and she didn't like the look on his face. "I love you, Arthur."

  He grasped the door handle. "Me too. I'll see you later." And he was gone.

  Later that afternoon, she received a note telling her he had called off the engagement. He gave no reason other than that he had realized he didn't love her and they wouldn't be happy together, but she knew in her heart the real reason. The wealth and privilege that had come from being the daughter of a prominent Boston family were no longer hers to claim. She was the daughter of a Irish immigrants, and as such, she needed to assume her proper station in life. This didn't include being married to an up-and-coming young lawyer like Arthur Welmington.

  Recalling the incident that seemed so long ago, she let the tears flow while she continued to soak in the big tub in her room. Wiping her tears, she stood and let the water stream down her body in the afternoon light. She grabbed the towel near her as a soft knock sounded at the door.

  “Just a moment.” Lily stepped from the tub and quickly dried herself off. She grabbed her dressing gown and slipped it on before she cracked the door open. Madge stood on the other side with a tray heavily laden with food.

  “My goodness, what’s all this?”

  “I thought you might be hungry, my dear, so I fixed you something to eat. May I come in?”

  “Of course, but you didn’t need to do this.” Lily moved back from the door to allow Madge to enter.

  “Oh, it’s nothing. Food is part of the room and board. Besides, you look like you could put on a few pounds.” Madge set the tray on the small table near the window. “Did you enjoy your bath?”

  “It was absolutely heavenly. It’s been at least a week since I was able to bathe properly, so it felt wonderful. Thank you so much for arranging it for me.”

  “You are quite welcome, my dear. I shall leave you to eat and rest. I’m sure you are exhausted from your long trip. I shall send up Daniel to retrieve the tub.”

  “Oh, that’s quite all right. I think I shall take a nap after I eat, so he can get it tomorrow if that’s all right? Unless you need it for another guest.”

  “No, not that I know of. If you want it removed later, just let me know.” Madge pulled open the door and moved out into the hall. “Enjoy your meal.”

  “Thank you. I will.”

  Lily closed the door behind her and walked back to the small table. The enticing smells of her dinner made her stomach growl in anticipation. She hadn’t eaten since early that morning, and it hadn’t been much. Her funds had begun to run low with the long trip, not affording her many luxuries. She really did need this teaching job, and she didn’t want to have to wire for money. That wasn’t acceptable to her now that she needed to be independent even though she had no doubt Edward and Kathleen would send her some if she asked. She needed to convince the people of Parkville she was very capable of teaching their children and could do so responsibly.

  When she had finished the delicious meal, she placed the tray in the hall so that it could be picked up and retreated to her room. The afternoon sunlight had begun to fade into early evening so she decided to go on to bed. Grabbing one of her favorite books, she took a seat in a large, comfortable chair near the window and decided to read for a bit.

  A few hours later, she opened her eyes to complete darkness outside. The small lamp continued to burn on the table next to her.

  My goodness, I must have fallen asleep in the chair. She stretched her tired muscles for a moment, then leaned over and blew out the lamp. The cooler night air permeated the room, and goose bumps flittered across her skin. Rubbing her arms, she retreated to the bed, pulled the downy coverlet and crisp sheets back and crawled underneath.

  Her tired eyelids fluttered as she sighed and snuggled into the soft mattress.

  Bang, bang, bang. "Open this door!"

  Lily gasped and sat bolt upright in bed, grasping the blanket to her chest.

  "Open this damned door, I said."

  Chapter Three

  The next morning found her up bright and early, in the dining room on the first floor of the boarding house, eating a hearty breakfast.

  “Everything tasty, dear?”

  “Excellent, Madge. You're a wonderful cook.”

  "Well, thank you." Madge frowned. "I'm really sorry about the noise last ni
ght."

  "It's quite all right." Lily giggled. "I've never been mistaken for a prostitute before."

  Madge grasped her hand. "And you never should! Anyone who looks at you would know you to be a fine young woman. I'm not even sure how Clayton Marshall managed to get inside the boarding house, much less to your door."

  "He obviously thought his woman was entertaining someone else in that room."

  "Unfortunately, he didn't realize he had stumbled into the wrong house."

  The two women laughed. "To think he actually mistook your boarding house for the brothel up the street."

  "Too much drink will do that to a man."

  "I suppose so."

  “Where are you off to this beautiful morning?” Madge asked while Lily gathered her things.

  “I need to talk to the mayor.” Her voice trembled slightly, giving away her nervousness. “He really wasn’t happy with me yesterday, I think.”

  “Oh?”

  “Yes, you see I had answered the advertisement for the teaching position here in Parkville, but it said the town wanted someone older. I'm pretty sure I stated my age, but when I stepped off the train yesterday, he wasn’t happy when he realized I'm only twenty-two.” She frowned. "Maybe I forgot to tell them."

  “I see. Well, if your abilities are up to the task, I don’t see why your age should make a difference.” Madge stacked the dishes and picked them up in her arms.

  “Thank you for the vote of confidence. I love children, always have. I used to tutor some of the local businessmen’s children in Boston and enjoyed it immensely, which is why I answered the ad for the position here. I wanted to earn my own living, and doing something I enjoyed would make it that much better.”

  “If you don’t mind me saying so, my dear, your speech indicates someone of breeding. Why would you come to a little, backwater town like Parkville for a teacher position?”

  Lily’s stomach lurched with trepidation. She didn’t want to stretch the truth, but Madge had obviously picked up on her apparent breeding, which made her question Lily’s reasons for being here. Thinking it was better to give some information, but maybe not everything, Lily began to explain.