by Jet MacLeod
“George,” I said quietly.
“George, that’s right. Did you know him?” Jed asked me, looking at me quizzically.
“I did. It was some time back, though. I haven’t seen him in years,” I said.
“Joe was a good man. Old, but he knew his horses and cattle. I’m sure he finally got himself a ranch somewhere. But, anyway, I hope that she gets you to stay,” Jed added.
“She’s trying,” I stammered, the emotion welling up inside me at the mention of George’s name.
“Well, I would hate to have to break in another whipping boy. I like you. I don’t want to see her hurt, you got me?” Jedidiah stated.
“Yes, I understand that. But, I wasn’t under the impression that I was anything but a horseman for her ranch. Why the hell does everyone keep calling me her whipping boy? What does that mean?” I asked.
“Well, boy, it is simple. You are the one that she wants. She’s made it obvious. She plans on keeping you. Frankly, you are the only one in a long string of men that she has actually gotten this far with,” he stated.
“I don’t think that answered my question,” I said.
“A whipping boy is a man or boy that a young woman of Miss Rayne’s nature keeps on to have her way with. She expects you to service her, make her a woman. She doesn’t care about her reputation. She doesn’t care about what people think. She is so far from town that no one there would know what you were to her. Unless, something bad happened. But, I doubt that you would that happen, would you, boy?” Jed questioned.
“No, I wouldn’t,” I stated, defensively.
“We knew you were the new one when she put you in the house. She wants you close to her. But, I can guess by the conversation that she hasn’t succeeded in her quest and for that I thank you. She is quiet fond of you; however, I am waiting for her to jump you in the night. Or, even propose to you. She wants someone with her to make her feel safe, I guess. She hasn’t since her parents dies in a raid. Poor girl been on the ranch for so long that she has forgotten what it is like to be a lady,” Jed explained.
“Well, I haven’t,” I stated.
“”I’m glad for it,” Jed replied, “Anyone else might have taken advantage of the situation and her by now. I’m glad that she chose you, though, boy, cause you’re a gentleman. Plus, the fact that you are the only one that I like. I wouldn’t mind having you as a boss.”
“Whoa, slow down. I am not your boss. I won’t your boss. I can’t be your boss, Jed. It just wouldn’t be right,” I told him.
“Oh, well,” he stated.
“I hope that you understand,” I stated.
“I understand that you are a gentleman and I respect that. I also thank you for that. Since her parents’ death, I have been the one raising her. I can’t say that I did a good job, only that I done my best,” he told me.
“I know. She shows me in little ways. Rayne has always shown me love in her own way,” he stated.
“Well, I should get back to work,” I stated.
“Alright, then, Reece. Just think about what I said. You should really think about it. You never know what may happen between now and then,” he said, walking off.
I stood there. He was right, but he didn’t know the truth either. I couldn’t stay here much longer without revealing the truth to everyone. They wouldn’t understand.
I had to laugh though. She thought that I would be her “whipping boy.” It was almost too much to bear. She thought that I would share her bed and make her horses great at the same time. Now, while that idea did have its appeal, it was something that I could never do. I didn’t know whether to be furious with her or to try and help her see the error in her thinking. I doubt either way that she would listen to me because of her naturally stubborn air.
I decided that I should go and have a talk with Rayne. I needed to nip this thing in the bud as soon as I could. It wouldn’t be pretty and I knew it. I had to be done though before any one got in any further. It was the only thing that I could do. I had to try.
I started looking for her. I looked in the house but didn’t find her there. I searched the barn for her horse only to find Silas combing Whiskers down. I shook my head. She was somewhere, she had to be.
“Silas, have you seen Miss Rayne?” I asked him.
“Yes, sir, she came back in from riding. She had been out looking at the cattle with Curly and Juan. I think she was going into town to talk with Mr. Loren about some supplies. She and Juan took the buckboard with Honeycomb,” he told me.
“Thank you,” I said.
She was in town. I would have to wait. I hated waiting. I decided to go see Cookie about dinner. I thought if I could talk to her alone for dinner that I could tell her what I needed to make her understand everything. It wouldn’t be the whole truth, but I would have to make her understand that I couldn’t stay. It was the only way that I would feel better about leaving them in the Fall.
*****
I sat in my room, looking out the window. It was getting dark and there was still no sign of Juan or Miss Rayne. Cookie had brought dinner to the house earlier. I was sure that it was on the table in the dining room cold. I didn’t care. I wasn’t hungry.
I sat in my chair next to the window. I pulled out my book of sonnets and read them. It was the only thing that I could do to clear my head. I had to be ready for her when she came back home. I couldn’t deal with this much longer. I had to tell her something so she would back down. I knew that it might not work, but I had to try.
It was hard enough on me. I couldn’t imagine what it was like for her. I wanted her and I knew that if I let myself that I would take her. I didn’t care about the rest and that was a dangerous place for me to be in. I couldn’t help her the way that she wanted to be helped. It didn’t matter how much that I wanted her, I could never be the person that she wanted me to be.
I must have fallen asleep in my chair in my room. The next thing I remember it was dark out and I heard Silas arguing with Juan outside in the barn. I decided that I needed to intervene before the boy got himself into trouble with the Mexican. I didn’t want any trouble but I knew there might be if I didn’t get down there soon.
I rushed into the barn and asked what was wrong.
“This little chico won’t move. I have to care for the horses,” Juan told me.
“I am supposed to do that, now,” Silas said.
“Alright then, here’s the deal. Juan, you take the horse off the buckboard and put the buckboard away. Silas is the stable boy. He’ll rub the horse down and make sure that she gets back to her stall. Good, now, everyone happy,” I stated, “It is too late to fight.”
“Si, senor,” Juan said.
“Yes, sir,” Silas answered.
“Good then. Good night, all,” I stated leaving them to finish the job.
I went back to the house. I found Miss Rayne sitting there in the living room in front of the fire. She looked heavenly but tired. I didn’t know what was wrong. She looked up at me and then at the table settings in the dining room.
“You did this?” she asked.
“Yes,” I replied.
“Why?” she questioned.
“Because we need to talk,” I said.
“About?” she asked.
“I am not staying. I am leaving at the end of the season and you know it. Silas is going to be upset. I just...” I started, “I don’t know what to do with him.”
“What do you want me to do about it?” she asked.
“I don’t know,” I replied.
“Sounds like you didn’t plan this very well,” she told me.
She was angry. I didn’t know about what, but she was angry. I could hear it in her voice, in her words. I could see it in her fiery green eyes.
“Did I do something?” I inquired.
“You know damn well what you have done,” she replied.
She turned and sat on the bench couch that was covered in the Mexican trade blankets. She eyed me in her ire. I racked my bra
in and sat in the wooden chair that was near the fire.
“I’m sure that I don’t know what you are talking about, Miss Rayne. If I have done something, I am sorry. I don’t know what it is that I may have done, except my job, but to apologize for anything that you feel that I have done that may have seemed inappropriate,” I stated.
“You just don’t get it, do you?” she inquired.
“I am sorry, no,” I answered.
She stood up and crossed the room to stand in front of me, where I was sitting. She had a devilish grin on her face and for a split second I was afraid of the woman. I didn’t know what she was planning but I was sure that I might regret it later.
“You are a fool, Reece Bradley,” she stated.
I stood up. I didn’t take kindly to being called a fool, I didn’t care who it was. I had a mind to strike her for it, but I knew that would get me beaten or worse shot, seeing how I was dressed.
“Watch yourself, Miss Rayne. I’ve held my temper with you before, I might not this time,” I told her.
“I am not worried about you,” she replied.
She was all venom and anger. I wonder what rattler got into her bed and bit her the wrong way. I was her target and she was going to take everything out on me.
“Why would I be worried about a gentleman such as yourself? I have more to worry about with the boys out in my bunkhouse than I do with you. Why should I care about you?” she questioned.
“One day, I might not be so nice with you,” I said.
“Is that a promise?” she inquired.
“Don’t tempt me, Miss Rayne. We both know that it would not be what we wanted. You should go to bed,” I told her, as I turned to walk away, but she wasn’t done.
“I didn’t dismiss you, boy,” she spat out.
“I wasn’t called, so therefore I can’t be dismissed. Goodnight, Miss Rayne. Maybe we will talk when you are calmer in the morning. I have no intentions of conversing with you in this manner,” I explained.
“Don’t you dare walk away from me!” she growled.
I turned to see the anger welling in her eyes. Her body was rigid and taught. She was ready for a fight and by God she was going to have it before she went to bed. She was beyond all thinking. She didn’t care at that moment whom she hurt, as long as she wasn’t the person that was hurt.
“Rayne, go to bed and sleep this off,” I told her.
“You will not dismiss me as if I was some hand that you command. I am your boss and you will listen to me. Do you understand?” she fumed.
“I understand that you are angry. I was not trying to make you feel like some hand. I know that you are my boss, but right now, you are being unreasonable. You need to get some sleep. We can talk about this is the morning. Goodnight, Miss Rayne, I hope you sleep well,” I said.
I turned to walk to the stairs to go to my room. It was my mistake. I should have never turned my back to her. I didn’t know how strong she was or I wouldn’t have done it. I knew, way too late, to never turn my back on her.
“Where do you think you are going?” she asked.
She grabbed me and spun me around. Her fingers dug into my arm. She was being vicious and mean. I could have gotten away, but I didn’t. I was going to stand there and let her do her worst. I owed her that much, I guessed because I had hurt her.
“I was going to go to bed,” I said.
“The hell you are,” she said.
“What do you want?” I asked.
Her eyes softened. Her body relaxed. She looked at me as if I had hit her. She backed away, scared of her own shadow. I had found the nerve that would calm her.
Then, she reverted back to the anger. Her eyes flashed angry, again. Her hands clenched at her side. I could see it coming, but I couldn’t stop it. She slapped me across my face. It was so hard that my head turned. I didn’t do anything in retaliation. I took it.
When she realized what she had just done, she stepped back. She was scared. She thought I was going to hit her. The thought had crossed my mind, but I knew that I wouldn’t do it.
“I am not going to hit you,” I told her.
“Why not?” she asked, as tears began to fall.
“I am not like that. You are upset. I’ve done something to upset you. For that, I am sorry,” I told her.
“You are a strange man,” she stated.
“So I’ve been told, Miss Rayne. Are you okay? Do you need something?” I questioned.
“No,” she stated, “Wait, Reece, I am sorry. I didn’t want to hit you. I am angry. I am sorry. I didn’t mean it.”
“I know you didn’t, Miss Rayne. Don’t worry about it. I forgive you,” I told her.
“Thank you,” she stated.
“No problem,” I replied, “Do you want to talk about it or something?”
“I…uh…I’m sorry,” she stammered.
“I’ll be fine,” she stated.
“Alright, then, goodnight,” I told her.
I turned to leave, hoping that this time I would make it back to my room. I should have known better. I should have known better. She wanted to talk. She was still upset.
“Reece, wait, I have to tell you something,” she said, “It is important.”
“Yes, ma’am,” I said, sitting back down on the couch, “Go ahead.”
She sat down next to me, her hand on my knee. I didn’t know what she wanted. I didn’t know what was making her so upset but I knew I wanted to make it go away. I wanted her to be happy and I would do anything that I could to make her happy.
“Reece, are you that slow, my dear?” she asked.
“I guess so, ma’am,” I replied.
She leaned into me and started crying. At least I thought she was crying so I gathered her in my arms and held her. She was laughing. I guess my answer was too innocent for her and she had to laugh.
She turned to look up at me. Her eyes were dancing. She smiled at me and I returned the favor. She seemed to have calmed down.
I was happy to see her smiling. I was happy because she seemed to be happy. I wasn’t prepared for what came next, though.
She kissed me. It wasn’t some chaste kiss. This was a mind blowing kiss that reached in and broke my heart. She let her tongue do the talking for her. Then, she stopped. She pulled back and studied me.
“I love you, silly,” she said.
Chapter Fifteen
Rayne, Junction City
I rode into town with Reece and Silas. It was Sunday and as promised before we were going to church. I could have gone all day without going but I made Reece a promise that I would take Silas every Sunday, so here I was. Somehow that turned into the three of us a month later.
Reece looked dashing in the suit that he bought. He had taken Silas into town for a new set of clothes at Don Taylor’s shop when he out grew his clothes. He said that the boy deserved it. I guess while they were there they got matching suits.
I couldn’t help but think we were a mismatched family riding into town for church. We were like so many of the frontier and Texas families that I grew up with. We had been thrown together and forced to survive. I didn’t mind actually. I was hoping that the idea would grow on Reece, but it didn’t look like it would.
He was still adamant about leaving in the Fall. Silas was trying his best to learn everything he could from Reece, but he didn’t want Reece to go either. Reece was doing his best with the boy, but you could tell it was killing them both.
It was now late July. We were heading into August and neither one of them wanted to think about September or October. Reece said that he would stay on until the round up in Amarillo in late September, early October. I was hoping that I could still convince him to come home with me after the round up was over.
I may have overstepped some bounds when I kissed him that night two weeks ago. I had been upset and that was not what I wanted to do or say. Okay, I’ll rephrase that, I wanted to tell him that I loved him, but I didn’t want it to be in that way. I did love him but I
knew it was almost a futile thing. He cared for me in way that I would never know or understand. He cared for me, it was a start.
I knew he would be leaving when I took him on, but that didn’t stop me. I can’t say when I realized it, but it was before that night. He just pushed me into saying it. I couldn’t help it.
We sat there in the buckboard, silent as ghosts. I wanted to shake my head, but I knew it would do no good. Silas and Reece were having their own problems. I was becoming a problem for Reece as well. I did want him to be happy, but the bad part was as long as it was with me.
We sat through the service. We sang when we were supposed to, we stood when we were supposed to; we sat when we were supposed to and then we prayed. I am sure that it was a might confusing for some of the town folk that we were together, but no one seemed to mind. In fact, a few commented to me that I had done well with my catch.
“I need to go see Sam. I owe him something,” Reece told me after church, “I’ll meet up with you later at the Del Mar’s.”
“Can I come with you?” Silas asked him.
“No!” Reece and I both said in unison.
“Why not?” Silas questioned.
“It isn’t a place that you should know yet. And, when you do, Silas, get to know it, I hope that don’t frequent it very often. I expect you to be a gentleman,” Reece explained, “And, that is no place for a gentleman.”
“Then, why are you going?” he inquired.
“I have some business to deal with. I owe Mr. Sam some money from some business that we had before I started working for Miss Rayne. Now, that I can, I must pay my debts. Do you understand?” Reece asked the boy.
“Yes, sir, but aren’t debts bad?” he asked.
“Yes, Silas, they can be. Now, you go on ahead with Miss Rayne to the Del Mar’s and get you some lunch. I’ll be there shortly, and Silas don’t give Miss Rayne any problems,” Reece stated.
“Yes, sir,” Silas replied.
“I’ll be there shortly,” Reece told me.
