Anastasia's Grail

by Mary Pearson

arrive, she began to wonder how healthy it was to maintain this stubborn attitude. She knew she was not behaving like a Christian. She could even understand that on some level her sister was trying to look out for her. It was just the way she did it that irked Stacy. Why did she have to be so crass? Hearing a honk, she snapped out of her reverie to see Darius’ truck under the street lamp across from her house. “Bye!” she called out to no one in particular.

  The concert was wonderful, living up to the early promise the group had shown, before diverging paths caused each member of the band to go his own way. Shane was spectacular on the drums. Daryl was probably the heart-throb of the group and all the ladies were trying to tear at his clothes. Stacy had read somewhere that he was married. She felt sorry for his wife. The solo song by Paul, Floating Endless, was one of Stacy’s favorites. But what could beat the haunting ballads sung by the lead singer, Paul’s brother, Jeff. Prodigal Lass had been on top of the charts for nearly a year. When they finished the concert with Dream Vacation, Stacy found herself clamoring along with the crowd for an encore. Downhill Nikki wowed the crowd with a brand new song. Stacy couldn’t wait to buy the CD.

  Darius enjoyed the concert every bit as much as Stacy had. Being in the front row was an unparalleled thrill. Afterward they were allowed backstage, as Libby had promised. They got autographs from each member of the band and joined them for appetizers and soda. Darius joined in an impromptu duet with Daryl, something Stacy was sure he would never forget. When they pulled out of the parking lot, he suggested they get some cappuccino and take a walk before going home. Stacy was flying high. There was no school yet. Tomorrow was New Year’s day, and there was no one she would rather ring in the New Year with than Darius. They didn’t kiss until midnight because they wanted their first one of the year to be memorable. So they slow danced in the middle of the dimly lit cul-de-sac where Stacy lived, Darius humming romantic standards rather well, she thought. He had a tolerable voice and ample star quality; she wondered in passing why he had never sought the limelight for himself. In between songs she murmured that he should be a lead singer. Darius laughed softly. “I’m good at advising other people. I don’t know if I can take criticism half as well.” Then he looked at his watch. “One minute,” he said softly. With the blue-lit face of his watch counting down the seconds they held each other close. At the stroke of midnight they abandoned themselves to the kiss for which they had been waiting.

  Seeing Air

  That song again. Stacy could no longer take it. “I give up, Em.”

  Emily looked up. “What…? You’re talking to me now?”

  “I have to know who wrote that song! Ok, I admit—I like it. So whose song is it?”

  There was a mischievous glint in her sister’s eye. “I’ll tell you if you apologize.”

  Stacy was shocked. “Me apologize! It’s you who ought to apologize.”

  “For what?” Emily’s face was blank.

  “For saying crass disgusting things about Darius.” Stacy frowned at her. “You don’t even know him.”

  Emily bit her lip. “I apologize,” she said, after a pause.

  Stacy sighed and smiled. “Then so do I. Now who wrote it? I want to buy the album.”

  “Danielle Rose,” said Emily. “And you can borrow mine if I can borrow yours. Grandma gave me her Defining Beauty CD. She gave you her two-CD Mysteries set. I’ve been waiting for you to listen to it, but you won’t take the hint.” Emily tapped the CD player.

  Stacy had completely forgotten that she had received Christian music from Grandma Annie for Christmas. Where had she put it…? She rummaged through her dresser drawers. Aha! She pulled it triumphantly from her sock drawer and ripped off the plastic wrapping. She handed the first CD to her sister and opened the jacket, which included the lyrics to all of the songs on the discs. “There’s a song for meditating each mystery of the twenty decade rosary plus intro and concluding songs,” she explained after scanning the leaflet. The two girls played the whole set straight through.

  “Awesome,” was Emily’s comment.

  Stacy nodded in agreement. “How can one artist do such varied styles of music?” The songs were sometimes bluegrass, sometimes rock, sometimes guitar and sometimes choral. A few were reminiscent of Baptist folk music. One sounded like Enya. She could do it all. Stacy was extremely impressed. The meditations were creative, too. For example, the Nativity song was written from the point of view of the Star of Bethlehem. She could really see a children’s choir performing it. The third sorrowful mystery was written from the point of view of the crown of thorns which had been placed on Jesus’ head, and was an acapella ballad. “But what is that song from your CD that you’ve got me hooked on?”

  “It’s called, Let Me Be Your Bethlehem.” Emily handed her the CD. Stacy read the lyrics:

  Is there no room in this world for You

  Oh, let me be Your Bethlehem, let me be Your Bethlehem

  It’s cold outside – see, I’ve opened up my door

  Let my life be Your Bethlehem

  Unto my life may You be born

  Born in a stable with the Angels close at hand

  Strength became weakness that we might understand

  A God Who is hungry, a King without a throne

  Emmanuel, a child is born…

  “I don’t know why I like it so much, but it just haunts me.” Stacy sighed and handed the disc back to her sister. “I’m a sucker for bluegrass, anyway.” She smiled and met her sister’s eyes. “I’m glad we’re talking again. I missed you.”

  “Let’s make a pact.” Emily held out her hand. “No more silent treatment. We can fight it out if we need to, but let’s not let anything or anybody ever come between us.” Stacy nodded and shook her sister’s hand.

  “So now that we’re talking…” Emily cleared her throat. “Are you really serious about Darius?”

  Stacy nodded. “It’s the real thing, Emily.”

  Emily’s look was skeptical. “How do you know?”

  “I just know,” Stacy sighed and met her sister’s eyes levelly. “We’re right for each other. I can feel it in my heart.”

  “You’re not considering marriage, “ Emily’s words were hesitant.

  Stacy paused, then decided to tell her. “He has asked me.” More or less.

  “Promise me one thing.” Emily took her sister’s hand. “Please, take your time before you decide. You don’t need to rush into anything. Marriage is forever,” she reminded Stacy.

  Stacy nodded, but she couldn’t make that promise. She wasn’t sure what circumstances might dictate. And besides, she was so in love with Darius, she couldn’t help but do whatever he wanted—as long as it didn’t go contrary to her beliefs.

  Monday found Stacy back at school after the long Christmas break. She was a bit irked to see Darius talking to Junie again in the hallway, but she let it go. She knew she had nothing to worry about. Darius loved her. She was sure of it.

  “I know what you can do to repay me for those tickets,” Libby took a dainty bite of her big leafy salad.

  Stacy swallowed and nodded. “Anything, Lib. The concert was unforgettable.”

  Libby looked a bit uncomfortable. “You know I can get anybody I want, Stace.”

  Stacy nodded again. Libby was very popular with guys.

  “The thing is I need someone to break the ice… “ Her voice trailed off and her eyes got a distant day dreamy look. “There’s somebody I’ve been interested in for awhile, but nobody I know knows him,” she met Stacy’s eyes, “except you.”

  Now Stacy was truly curious. Who could she possibly know that popular Libby didn’t have access to? She raised a brow.

  “He’s a friend of your cousin, Zeke. His name is Arthur.”

  Not Arthur. Anybody but him. Stacy hesitated before speaking. “Are you sure he’s right for you? I mean, it doesn’t seem like you’d have all that much in common.”

  “Believe me, Stacy. He’s got what I’m looking for, and I’m sure I ca
n convince him that I’m what he’s looking for. Besides,” she nudged Stacy’s foot with hers under the table, “that’ll give us more opportunity to hang out together.”

  This was true. Stacy wasn’t all that sure it would be a good thing. But she did owe Libby. Why was she feeling so reluctant? For goodness sake, she had Darius. What more could she want? “Sure, I’ll talk to him, if you like.” She said it quickly, like pulling off a bandage. “Just what do you want me to say?’

  Libby laughed nervously. “Don’t say anything obvious. I’ll just hang out with you for a few days and it’s bound to happen naturally.” It was clear she had thought this thing out. “So, how about tonight? Will you see him?”

  Stacy nodded. She felt like she was stabbing Arthur as she spoke. “We go to Confirmation class together. Then we pray and work out afterwards. He’s always there.”

  “I’ll come to your house tonight. You can bring me as a guest to Confirmation. I’ll come with workout clothes and then I’ll hang out with you guys.” When Stacy said nothing she paused. “Is that all right with you?”

  Was it…? “Of course,” Stacy heard herself choke out. But it didn’t feel all right.

  It was a bit awkward explaining Libby’s sudden interest in hanging out at their house. She came toward the end of Stacy’s slightly shortened shift at the bread shop. Stacy gave her a mini-tour of the place. When she brought Libby to Confirmation all eyes were on the two of them.

  “Are you interested in studying