Holding the Fort
Page 22
Suddenly there were troopers all around, and curiously, Major Adams was not in charge. Instead, a rotund young man with prematurely thinning hair was barking orders. With a gloved hand pointing at Daisy, he directed two troopers to lift her onto a stretcher and carry her back to the fort.
“She’s my daughter,” Daniel said as he waved the stretcher away. “I’ve got her.”
The doctor nodded his assent, then knelt by Bradley to examine him.
“He’s done this before,” Louisa said, “when he was little.”
The doctor spared her the merest glance as he placed a stethoscope to Bradley’s chest. “They have the tendency to get worse every time,” he said. “Breathe.”
The whistling sound in Bradley’s lungs scared Louisa. The doctor didn’t like it, either. “All right, boys. Let’s get him loaded up and taken to the hospital. And I need some chewing tobacco to apply to these stings. If you have any on you, get to chewin’. It’ll draw out the poison.”
Louisa continued to hold Bradley’s hand until they got him loaded on the stretcher and hustled him to the hospital with the doctor at his side.
“Doc!” Daniel barked as he rode, carrying Daisy. “You haven’t even looked at my daughter—”
But Doc faced him down, grimly determined. “Major, this trooper’s life is in danger. Your daughter will recover.”
Louisa covered her mouth. Was Bradley dying? Was this the last time she’d ever see him? Then she saw Daniel’s face. It was drawn, white. His eyes flashed wild and scared. And it was her fault. She’d taken Daisy out under the guise of wildflower hunting when all she’d wanted was a chance to talk to Bradley. Look what her dishonesty had caused.
Two people’s lives were in danger because of her poor judgment. Pretending to be something she wasn’t had cost the people she loved most in the world.
Chapter Twenty-One
Daniel took the clay mixture from Private Gundy’s hand, barely registering the gentle pat the trooper gave his shoulder as he exited Daisy’s bedroom.
“Here, Father, let me do it.” Caroline scraped the clay out of his palm and carefully began to reapply it to soothe the red welts that covered her sister. Daniel leaned back in the chair that had magically appeared next to her bed. Upon first hearing Caroline’s voice raised across the green, he’d thought the girls were up to their usual antics. He’d wondered where Louisa was, how they’d gotten away from her. But then the tenor of her cries became more clear, and Daniel had mounted the nearest horse and raced to meet her.
Following Caroline’s frantic gestures, he quickly reached them. With relief, he saw Louisa kneeling next to Daisy. He knew her first concern would be to get Daisy somewhere safe, just as his was. But somehow everyone from Louisa to Doctor Bowen seemed more worried about Private Willis. And where was Miss Bell now? Instead of looking after her charge, she stayed with that good-for-nothing man. Daniel stared through dull eyes at his baby girl. How could Louisa abandon her responsibility? Had she put his daughter in danger to arrange a secret meeting with the trooper?
Daisy stirred, but without the pained agitation she’d had before.
“How are you, honey?” he asked. Her face was covered with patches of Reno’s red clay over her welts, but she had calmed.
“It hurts,” she whimpered.
If it would help, he’d send his troops out to find every hornet nest in the territory, pour kerosene on them, and set them aflame.
“You are being so brave,” he said. “The bravest soldier I’ve ever known. Dr. Bowen said it’ll stop stinging by tomorrow morning. We’ve just got to be brave for a little while longer.”
Her chin quivered. “Where’s Miss Bell? I want her here.”
So did he, but she’d abandoned her post. Again.
Before Daniel could answer, Caroline spoke. “Miss Bell is with Private Willis. He saved your life, Daisy, and he’s doing poorly now. Worse than you.”
“That’s enough,” Daniel said. “I won’t have you making her feel guilty.”
“But it’s the truth.” Caroline’s jaw hardened, a sure sign that she believed what she said and wouldn’t be hushed.
“Private Willis got caught in the same swarm as Daisy,” Daniel said, “by the same dumb luck. He was supposed to be whitewashing the fence, not lollygagging in the wildflowers.”
Caroline flung her hair over her shoulder, like she was getting clear for a fight. “He was whitewashing the fence. Only after Daisy started screaming did he run right into that cloud of wasps and carry her away. And now he might die for it.”
Daisy’s weak sobs only fueled Daniel’s anger. “We’ll talk about this later,” he said. “We shouldn’t upset your sister.” But really he was the one who was getting agitated. What if it were true? What if he owed Private Willis everything? He held a glass to Daisy’s mouth. “It’s milk,” he said. “Should help cool you down.”
She only managed a sip before dozing off into another fitful trance.
Unfortunately, any kind of rest was out of Daniel’s reach. Why would Private Willis give his life for Daisy? He didn’t owe Daniel anything. Probably the boy thought he was impervious to the hornet attack. Maybe he was trying to prove himself. Either way, if it were true, some recognition was called for. As commander of the fort, it was Daniel’s duty to check on Private Willis, no matter how badly he wished otherwise. He’d check on the trooper, and while he was at it, he’d remind Louisa of her duty. She wasn’t on the fort to sit at the bedside of her secret paramour.
Private Gundy returned to the room with two plates of food. “You might as well eat something,” he said. “It don’t help no one for you to go hungry.”
Caroline took the fork from his hand and started into her bowl of beans and flatbread. No reason to starve yourself if you had an appetite, but Daniel didn’t.
After getting Gundy’s assurance that he would stay with Daisy and Caroline, Daniel headed downstairs. Stopping to get his hat from his office, he wondered again at Louisa being gone so long. Didn’t she feel any obligation to him and Daisy? He thought of Louisa as family, but obviously she didn’t consider him that important. And to think he’d been composing sappy love letters to her.
Speaking of the letter—where was it? He scanned his desk, then riffled through the loose papers on the blotter. Had he put it in his pocket? Maybe he’d left it by his bed, although he didn’t remember taking it upstairs. His whole world was out of control, and Daniel did not appreciate it.
Tamping down his frustration, he set out for the hospital. A wagon of firewood was parked next to the kitchen. The troopers who’d been down to the riverbank to collect it were now unloading it and paused in their work to watch him walk by. No greetings, no salutes. They’d heard about Daisy and were uncertain how to respond. But one brave trooper stepped forward.
“Major Adams, we want to say how sorry we are about your daughter. It’s good to hear she’s going to recover.”
“Thank you,” he said.
“And we’re really torn up about Private Willis. The Mennonites joined us in prayer for him, and some are still at the chapel, praying for him right now. He’s too good a man to go that way.”
Daniel’s steps slowed. While the general sentiment shared by military men was that any death not earned in battle was doubly mourned, he was surprised by their concern. And irritated that he couldn’t truthfully find the space in his heart to be worried about Willis, not while Daisy was hurting. But it was wrong of him. Had his love for Louisa prejudiced him against the private? Instead of seeing Bradley Willis as a trooper who needed to learn the discipline of the U.S. Cavalry, Daniel viewed him as a threat. As a rival.
A rival that had perhaps sacrificed his life for Daisy’s.
Two sentries scanning the open fields for Cheyenne encroachers jumped to attention as Daniel approached the hospital. One reached around to swing the door open for Daniel as he passed inside, and the orderly on duty motioned him to a room down the hall. The light from the window behind hi
m illuminated the doctor, who was bent over the bed with a stethoscope, listening to his patient’s chest. What Daniel could see of the bloated figure between the linen wrappings looked nothing like Private Willis. Daniel only got a glimpse of the trooper’s face before he had to look away. The disfigurement was equal to any he’d seen in battle. Eyes swollen shut, nose bulbous, lips cracked and bleeding. Had he done this to himself to save Daisy?
Daniel couldn’t move. He’d thought Daisy’s case was terrible until he saw this. Daisy could express her pain. Private Willis couldn’t even communicate. Could barely breathe. If it turned just a tad worse . . .
Doc didn’t acknowledge him, continuing to listen to Willis’s labored breathing. Only then did Daniel see Louisa sitting in the corner. Red splotched her eyes. She held a yellow cavalry neckerchief to her face to mop her tears.
Had it been any other situation, he would have been moved by her distress. Daniel stood still, unsure of what to do. Manufacturing concern when he felt none was beneath him, and yet he realized he should care. Something was wrong with him if he didn’t.
Daniel’s chest stretched in a long, painful breath. When had he grown so cold to the sufferings of others? Had the duties that kept him from his family also kept him from feeling? Until Miss Bell had come, he’d gone about his day-to-day work, not allowing himself to feel anything beyond frustration at failure or satisfaction at achievement. His troopers were only pawns arranged for the best results.
With Miss Bell, the gentler side of his nature had awakened, but so had the ugly. He might be able to love again, but he could also hurt. And Miss Bell was testing him on both counts.
Shame on him. How many times had Daniel mourned the fact that a trooper had died alone? Louisa hadn’t left Willis to his fate. She’d been sitting here with this hero, and no matter how Daniel’s vanity protested, he owed her for that.
He sat on the bench next to her. Her shoulders shook as she wept. His anger seeped away, along with his hope. He’d been a fool to think he could stand between her and the man she so obviously loved. Putting away his own feelings, he took her hand. Louisa clung to it.
“I should’ve protected Daisy better,” she sobbed. “I shouldn’t have taken her outside.”
His hand tightened around hers. “She’s always run around here free as a bird. This could’ve happened at any time.”
She took a long, shaky breath. “Logically, I know that’s true. It’s just my emotions getting the better of me.”
“She’s going to be fine, thanks to you.” Leaning on his incredible military discipline, he added, “And thanks to Private Willis.”
At that, Louisa dissolved into tears again. She fell against his arm and sobbed into his sleeve. Daniel lifted his arm to pull her against himself. Doc could think what he wanted. If Willis ever recovered, it would be clear enough that Daniel was only comforting the distraught sweetheart of the injured man. No one could accuse him of behaving improperly.
Slowly, as she began to regain her composure, he could feel his heart settling as well. She was in love with another. He’d thought it was only a passing fancy, but he had to face the truth. He could admire her, he could appreciate her, but he could never love her the way he wanted to. She wouldn’t allow it.
She sniffled and looked up at him with those bottomless blue eyes. “Private Willis is a good man, as are you. It does me good to hear that you approve.”
His arm felt disembodied, but he imagined that he’d squeezed her shoulder in affirmation. “I owe him a great deal for his sacrifice. Who could’ve known the price would be so high—”
“He did.” She smiled fondly at the miserable mass of flesh on the bed. “He knew that a hornet sting could be deadly for him, but he did it anyway.”
And how would she know that? But then Daniel remembered her saying the same thing about her brother. Perhaps the two of them had discussed the similarity . . . while hiding outside his kitchen after dark. He forced away the unkind thought and tried to focus again on the situation at hand.
Seeing that Louisa had composed herself, he rose and moved to the cot where Willis lay. “Can he hear me?” he asked the doctor.
“I don’t know how much he’ll understand. His pulse is weak, but if you have something to say, now’s the time.”
Daniel had sent up many a prayer for Daisy already, but to his shame, he hadn’t entreated God on Bradley Willis’s behalf. And if anyone needed prayer right now, it was Bradley Willis.
Daniel dropped to his knees next to the cot. Taking Bradley’s swollen, wrapped hand, he worked to put his heart in the correct place before speaking.
“Private—Bradley. This is Major Adams. You saved my daughter’s life today. I don’t know if you thought your actions through or if it was just an impulse, but she’s going to be fine because of your sacrifice. No matter what else you do with your life—or whatever you’ve done in the past—saving a life is something holy, something that reflects the heart of God.”
It was hard to reconcile this motionless body with the impulsive troublemaker who had so challenged him, but the longer Daniel thought about it, the more he realized that saving Daisy was just the reckless, impulsive thing that men like Private Willis specialized in. He should thank God that Bradley wasn’t more careful.
“I don’t know where you stand with God”—although Daniel in his more judgmental moments didn’t give Bradley much hope—“and it feels wrong for me to sit here and talk to you about your sins when you just saved my daughter’s life, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t remind you that God is near. He waits to hear from you. He made you and loves you and offers you the most precious gift—Himself, in the form of His Son, Jesus.”
There was no response, but what did Daniel expect? Maybe talking about the hereafter wasn’t the best topic at a bedside, but it was often the last chance when more logical opportunities had been neglected.
“Foremost, I’m praying for your speedy recovery,” he said. “And as soon as you get back on your feet, if it’s alright, I want to bring Daisy over so she can say thank you. You saved the life of my little girl, and we’re forever grateful.”
Daniel’s throat tightened as his eyes drifted toward Louisa. He’d have to be grateful for what Willis had given him, and not think of what he was taking away.
What a bitter victory. Bradley finally had Major Adams’s regard, but he might not live to benefit from it. Louisa believed there was a God, but she didn’t want to believe He’d be so cruel.
Daniel and the doctor talked over the medical supplies that they had available and the possibility of ordering something more specific for the outpost once shipments resumed, but Louisa lost interest. Instead, Daniel’s words still rang in her ears. God didn’t care what you’d done, or who you’d been? It wasn’t too late to become His child? That didn’t fit with what she’d experienced. She couldn’t understand how she still had tears left to cry, but they were trickling down her cheeks as Daniel turned toward the door.
Seeing her, he stopped. “Daisy is asking for you, but stay here as long as you feel you need to.”
How could he be so generous when she’d gone against his wishes to visit Bradley? “Staying here must seem unladylike,” she said. “I hope you’ll forgive me.”
He shot a glance at the doctor, who was busy measuring the contents from a green-tinted bottle. Leaning closer, Daniel whispered, “I myself have been hurt and received attentions that some might deem unladylike, but that were most appreciated. You have a tender heart. There’s no shame in that.”
Her heart almost burst. If he couldn’t read the adoration in her eyes, he was blind. She thought she saw recognition there, but then he stiffened and, with a formal bow, made his departure.
But Louisa had questions.
“Wait.” She followed him out to the empty hallway, feeling nearly suffocated by the afternoon heat and the weight of her questions. “What you said to Private Willis about God, did you say that just because he’s hurt, or because he save
d Daisy?”
Daniel paused, his eyes suddenly very focused. Had she said something wrong? Was what he said to Bradley not meant for her?
“What do you mean, Louisa? God has loved Private Willis from the beginning. He didn’t earn God’s love when he saved Daisy.”
“I hope you’re right,” Louisa said. “But what if you’re wrong? Maybe God isn’t there for him. Maybe he has to find his way alone.”
And the thought of her brother teetering on death’s door alone, without any comfort, terrified her.
For the second time that day, Daniel felt like he’d had the wind knocked out of him.
Louisa didn’t know Christ.
The revelation stunned him. He’d wondered about her reticence and thought it might be that as a Mennonite she kept her religion private. But that didn’t explain her reluctance to attend the chapel services or her nervousness when he mentioned the missionaries at the agency. And now these questions. Something was missing.
“Louisa, God loves each of us, even though we’re all flawed.”
She twisted her hands in agitation. “But someone tainted—like Private Willis, for example—they can’t come near God. God wouldn’t allow it. He’s too holy.”
Daniel nodded, proud that she continued to ask, even when she was afraid of the answers.
“And that’s where Jesus comes in. He lived here on Earth among us, but He lived without ever sinning. He did what we couldn’t do, and then He paid our penalty so that we are forgiven. All we have to do is confess our sins to God and ask Him to accept Jesus’s sacrifice on our behalf.”
“I’m confused.” Louisa twisted the yellow neckerchief. “I mean, I know all of this, of course, but I was just surprised you said it to Private Willis. That’s all.”
That couldn’t be all. Her confusion was sincere, as were her questions. Just another inconsistency in her story, but this wasn’t the time to call her out.