A Good Enough Reason

by C. M. Lievens

  “Yeah, sure.” Dale got up, unlocked the door, and sat back at his desk, pulling up the essay he was working on on the screen.

  Dad came in and sat on the bed. “I wanted to know how things were going with your mother.”

  Dale pivoted his chair and faced his father. “Why do you think I want to stay here this week, Dad?”

  “That bad, huh?”

  “Yeah. She won’t talk to me, and she looks at me like she doesn’t know me anymore. It’s hard to see.”

  “She’ll come around.”

  “I don’t know, but it’s already been two weeks.”

  “And she was under the impression you were straight for how many years?”

  “But you were too, and you don’t seem to have a problem with me being with Ellis.”

  Dad shrugged. “I know other people who are gay. It’s not as hard to accept, and I just want you to be happy.”

  “I am. Well, except for Mom. Even Stephanie isn’t angry at me anymore.”

  “So. I also wanted to make sure you know you have to protect yourself even with another guy. It’s not like Ellis can get pregnant, but I hope you know you have to wear condoms anyway.”

  “Dad!”

  “What?”

  “I know that! I didn’t need you to remind me. Ugh.”

  “Yes, well, I’d rather embarrass you than have you getting sick or something.”

  “Dad, it’s not like I sleep with a lot of different guys.” Dale realized he’d basically admitted he did sleep with some, and he hurriedly added, “I mean, I’m with El, and we haven’t done anything yet, and he’s, well, he hasn’t done anything with anyone, so….”

  “Doesn’t mean you can skip condoms.”

  “I know, okay? Don’t worry about it.”

  “Do you have some, or do I have to buy them for you?”

  “Dad, do we really have to talk about this?”

  “Just answer the question, Dale.”

  “I have condoms, don’t worry.”

  “Lube?”

  “Dad!”

  “You’re going to need it. Not that I have firsthand experience, but I did a little research after you told us you were bisexual.”

  The thought his dad might have looked at the same websites Dale had read through made him want to hide under his comforter. “I kind of researched it too, so don’t worry. And can we never, ever talk about this again, please?”

  “Yeah, okay. Just so you know, you can talk about anything with me, though. Okay?”

  “Not sex.”

  “Even sex. Even if it’s embarrassing or if you think it’s stupid or whatever. I want you to know I’m here for you if you need me.”

  His father’s words made the distance Dale felt from his mother even more acute, but he was happier than he’d admit to hear them. It made him feel better and like he wouldn’t be alone no matter what. It felt good, especially after spending the past week at home with his mom.

  “Thanks.”

  Dale hesitated before leaning forward and hugging his dad. Dad’s arms went around Dale’s waist and held him close as they hugged. Dale patted his father’s shoulder a few times, then moved away.

  “Oh, and if you two really have to have sex, you can do it here.”

  “Dad!”

  “Just make sure your sister isn’t here, and keep the volume down.”

  “Daaad!” Dale whined.

  “I’m serious, Dale. I know you’re eighteen and you’re bound to have sex with Ellis sooner rather than later. I’m also pretty sure you’re not a virgin.”

  “I’m not answering that.”

  “And I’m not asking for an answer. I’m just telling you I’d prefer you do it here rather than in your car or God knows where else.”

  Dale shook his head. “How can you be so calm about this? I mean, even Ellis’s parents aren’t, and they already knew he was gay.”

  “I don’t know if I’m calm. I don’t see why you liking boys should be a problem. Not everyone thinks that way.”

  “I don’t know of many parents who tell their kids they can have sex at home.”

  Dad clasped Dale’s shoulder. “I wish I’d had that opportunity when I was your age.”

  “Oh, eww, don’t make me think about you having sex, Dad!”

  “Well, you didn’t just materialize into this world, you know.”

  “Dad! I think I need brain bleach.”

  Dad laughed and rose from Dale’s bed. “I mean it, Dale. Talk to me, for whatever you need.” Dale smiled and nodded. “Okay. I’ll be in the living room. Oh, and I expect Ellis to come by for dinner sometime this week.”

  “I’ll tell him.”

  “You do that, son.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  “EL?”

  Ellis frowned at Anna’s voice, but maybe it was just the connection that was bad. “What’s up? We saw each other a few hours ago at school.”

  “You should check Facebook.”

  Ellis cocked his head to the side and tucked the phone between cheek and shoulder. He grabbed his laptop from the desk and put it in front of him on the bed, then opened it and turned it on. “Why?”

  “Mark.”

  Ellis knew it couldn’t be good, not if Mark was involved. “What did he do?”

  “He followed you when you went on your date with Dale.”

  “He what?”

  “He took some pictures and posted them on Facebook.”

  Ellis’s eyes went wide, and he quickly opened his browser, then his Facebook page. There were already posts on his wall, and most of them weren’t nice. “Does Dale…?”

  “I don’t know. I called you as soon as I saw them.”

  “Yeah, okay. Thanks. I need to hang up and call him, okay?”

  “Yeah. I’m sorry, El.”

  “It’s not your fault.” Except it was, at least a bit, but Ellis wasn’t about to tell her. Ellis knew Mark had heard Anna that day in the classroom, when Ellis had told her about having a boyfriend. She had meant well, but Ellis should’ve known Mark wouldn’t let it go.

  “I’m still sorry. Call me later, okay?”

  “Yeah. Yeah, I will.”

  Ellis hung up without saying good-bye. He typed Mark’s name into the search bar and clicked on the guy’s picture. Once on Mark’s profile, it wasn’t hard to find the pictures. There were three of them, all on top of his feed, and each of them had dozens of likes and comments already.

  Ellis stared at them. One wasn’t very clear and had obviously been taken in the theater. The other two were of Dale and Ellis in front of Ellis’s house, which meant Mark had followed them around. Knowing for sure creeped Ellis out.

  Mark had been there, in front of his house, probably hidden in his car and spying on Ellis and Dale while they kissed. Had he left after Dale had, or had he stayed to spy on Ellis a bit more?

  Ellis looked out his window. He sprang up and closed the curtains. His heart beat like crazy at the thought Mark could be out there, watching him. He grabbed his phone from the bed and sat on the edge of the mattress, then dialed Dale’s number. His eyes kept straying to the laptop screen, and he’d never been more grateful when the screen blacked out after a few seconds.

  “El?”

  “Dale, I’m so, so sorry.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Where are you?”

  “I just finished practice. I’m on my way home.”

  “Mark followed us the other day. He took pictures and posted them on Facebook.” It came out in a stream of words Ellis couldn’t have stopped even if he’d wanted to.

  “Wait, slow down. What did Mark do?”

  “He followed us the other night, when we went out. He took pictures of us in the theater and in front of my house. Pictures where we’re kissing and hugging. Then he posted them on Facebook.”

  “Shit.”

  “Yeah. Look, we can stop being friends for a while, until people stop caring. You can say you were experimenting or something, or that it
was a bet.”

  “El, what are you talking about?”

  “I’m trying to find a way to, I don’t know, limit the damage or something.”

  “And you think we can do that by denying we’re together?”

  “You’ll be fine. No one will believe you’re really gay, not after Stephanie.”

  “El, stop being stupid.”

  “What?”

  “I’m not going to deny we’re together.”

  Ellis gaped. “What? Why not?”

  “Why should I?”

  “Because things are going to be bad if you don’t. You should see some of the comments.”

  Dale growled. “I can imagine. I suggest you stop reading them.”

  “Yeah, okay, but—”

  “No buts, El. Close the browser.”

  Ellis huffed and brought his laptop back to life. He looked at the pictures again and bit his lower lip. “What are we going to do?”

  “I’m coming over. We’ll talk when I get there.”

  “Yeah, okay. I’ll tell Mom I’m expecting you.”

  They ended the call, and Ellis went in search of his mother. She was in her room, getting ready for work. “Mom?”

  “Hey, hon. Don’t worry, I froze a batch of lasagna the last time I cooked it and told your father to heat that for dinner tonight.”

  “Oh, nice. Can Dale come over for a bit?”

  “Is he staying for dinner?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Just let your father know, and remember it’s a school night.”

  “Thanks, Mom.”

  Ellis went back to his room, but he couldn’t stay still. He sat on his bed only to get up and start pacing. He looked at the window every few seconds, but it didn’t bring Dale faster, and of course there were no signs of Mark.

  When he finally saw Dale’s car pull up in front of the house, he ran to the stairs and hurried down. He was already opening the front door when Dale was only locking the car.

  “Hi.”

  Dale stepped inside and waited until Ellis had closed the door to hug him tight and kiss him. “Hey. How are you?”

  “Creeped out, mostly. Come on, let’s go upstairs.”

  Ellis stopped at his mom’s bedroom door just long enough to tell her Dale was there. She smiled at him. “Tell your dad about dinner, and if you’re about to have sex please wait until I’m out of the house, okay?”

  “Mom!”

  Ellis heard Dale groan beside him, but Mom said, “El, I wasn’t born yesterday. You’re almost eighteen, you have a boyfriend, of course you’re going to have sex. If not full sex, at least some kind of it. It’s nothing bad, nothing to be ashamed of, just be safe. And try not to make too much noise.”

  Ellis huffed and kissed her good-bye before grabbing Dale’s hand and pulling him toward his room. It was harder to keep up a happy face now that his mom wasn’t in front of him anymore, and his hands shook as he closed his bedroom door.

  “You can check on the laptop,” he told his boyfriend.

  Dale nodded and took the computer. Ellis watched as he scrolled through the pictures and the comments left under them. Ellis had already turned off the notice tone, both on his cell and on his laptop, because it continuously went off. He couldn’t even think about the number of messages and notifications he was getting.

  He slumped on the bed next to Dale and avoided looking at the laptop screen. He waited until Dale closed it before talking. “What do we do?”

  Dale raked a hand in his hair. “You should tell someone. It’s not bullying anymore, El. He followed us around. He followed us to your house and took pictures. That’s not normal. He’s clearly obsessed with you, and I know something happened in the bathroom the other day, even if you don’t want to tell me.”

  “I know.” Ellis wouldn’t tell Dale what he thought had been about to happen then, but he’d tell his parents. He had to.

  “How do you want to deal with the rest?”

  “You can say you were experimenting.”

  “Yeah, no, that’s not going to happen. We’re together, no experimenting, no confusion. I’m not about to deny it, unless that’s what you want.” Dale took Ellis’s hand in his and stroked his thumb over Ellis’s knuckles.

  Ellis sighed. “I don’t, but things are going to be hard for you. People are going to insult you, some team members won’t want you in the locker room anymore, or to play with you. You’re going to lose some friends.”

  “El… it’s already out.” Dale snorted. “We’re already out. Maybe saying it was a mistake will make things easier for me, but it won’t for you, and this is going to be hard enough. I don’t want to make things worse. I don’t want to hide our relationship. We’re working on a same-sex couple project, and we believe in it. We should be proud of being together.”

  Ellis leaned his head on Dale’s shoulder. “Tomorrow isn’t gonna be fun.”

  “I know. Maybe your parents will let you stay home?”

  “Probably, if I told them what happened, but would it really change anything? I’m not going to let you face everyone alone, and even if you stay home too, we’re still going to have to face them sometime. Let’s just do it as soon as possible and be done with it.”

  Dale kissed Ellis’s forehead. “If you’re sure.”

  “I’m sure.”

  They both knew it was far from the truth.

  THEY’D DECIDED Dale would pick Ellis up the next morning. Ellis had no intention of braving the student crowd on his own, even if Anna had texted him, and she and Rick were already waiting for him in the school’s parking lot. It wouldn’t be the same thing, and Ellis knew everyone would think Dale had run if they didn’t show up together.

  “Mom?”

  She’d just come back from her shift at the hospital, and it showed. She was tired, the circles under her eyes a bit darker than usual. “Yes?”

  Ellis put the coffee he’d gotten ready for her in front of her on the kitchen table. She gave him a grateful smile and took a sip, closing her eyes at the taste.

  “I need to talk to you.”

  Mom looked at the microwave clock. “Is it important? You don’t have much time before you have to leave for school.”

  “Dale is picking me up. I, well, I have more than one thing to tell you, but I need to say one of them right now.” Telling her about Mark could wait until tonight. It was too complicated to explain in a few minutes.

  Mom put her mug down and looked at Ellis. She clasped her hands, and her eyebrows drew closer together. “What’s wrong?”

  “Someone saw me and Dale the other night and outed us on Facebook.”

  “Oh, honey. I’m sorry.”

  Ellis shrugged. “It’s okay. We’re not ashamed or anything, so it’s fine.”

  “I know you didn’t want everyone to know.”

  “No, because I know it’s going to make Dale’s life more difficult, but we can’t do anything now.”

  A car honked outside, and Ellis peeked between the curtains. Dale noticed him and waved. “Dale’s here. I’ll see you tonight?”

  “Yes.”

  Ellis waved good-bye and hurried outside. Dale was waiting by the passenger door and smiled, but Ellis could see he was worried anyway. It was obvious in the tense way Dale was holding himself.

  “Everything okay?”

  Dale nodded and kissed Ellis before walking around the car. They both got in and put their seat belts on.

  “A few members of the team called me last night, after I left your house.”

  “What happened?”

  “Tyler wasn’t happy, but Jake and Pete were fine with it. They asked me why I never told them.”

  “So they’ll support you?”

  “Yeah, looks like it. I also got a call from Anthony.” He looked at Ellis like Ellis should’ve recognized the name, but Ellis didn’t.

  “Who’s that?”

  “He’s the guy I wanted to set you up with, remember?”

  “Oh, the o
ne you thought was gay?”

  “Yeah.”

  “And? What did he want?”

  “He told me he was gay too and that he was sorry for what was happening.”

  “Oh.”

  “Yeah. He’s not ready to officially come out, though.”

  “We weren’t either.”

  The rest of the ride to school wasn’t nearly long enough, and Dale was parking the car all too soon for Ellis’s taste. A few heads turned their way, and it made him want to hide, but he knew it was nothing like what would be waiting for them as soon as they stepped inside the school.

  Dale looked at him and squeezed his hand. “Ready?”

  “No.”

  Dale laughed. “Okay, then. Let’s go.”

  They got out, and Ellis watched Anna and Rick make their way toward them. Anna launched herself at him, and he almost fell on his ass while trying to grab her. He leaned against the car instead and hugged her. “Everything okay?” he asked her.

  She moved away and slapped his chest. “I should be the one asking you if you’re okay. Are you?”

  “I will be once this day is over.”

  Because it wasn’t only the crowd’s reaction that worried Ellis. He also wondered what Mark would do, but most of all, he’d talk to Mr. Shea today, and it was the last thing he wanted to do. He knew it had to be done, though. Mark was getting worse, and Ellis didn’t want to wait until the guy snapped.

  He looked at Dale, and their eyes met. Dale nodded and offered Ellis his hand. They’d talked about it the night before, and Dale had insisted they should enter the school holding hands, like every other couple did. Ellis wasn’t so sure about it, but he’d caved in. Everyone knew about them anyway.

  He reached up and grabbed Dale’s hand. Dale squeezed in a reassuring gesture, and Ellis squared his shoulders, then turned to Anna. “You’re coming with us?”

  “Of course we are!”

  She took Rick’s hand and pulled him along when they started walking. Ellis was ready to puke, and he gritted his teeth against the sensation as they reached the stairs that led to the entrance. More and more people were noticing them and looking at them, but no one said anything yet.

  They walked into the school, and the level of noise assaulted Ellis’s ears, like every other morning. People looked at them and whispered, some even pointed, but Dale just strode by, his back straight and his jaw tense. Ellis walked by his side and looked straight ahead.