Edge: A Tortured Heroes Novel

by Jayne Blue

  Maybe Lila sensed something in me. Maybe something similar burned in her. Whatever it was, she reached for me, placing a light hand against my cheek. She went up on her tiptoes and cocked her head to the side, parting her lips.

  “I think Crystal Falls has its definite charms,” she whispered, her eyes flickering over my face.

  I tilted my head toward hers. Her eyelids hooded as she waited for the kiss. A storm brewed inside of me.

  Control. I was losing it. I knew what could happen if I let myself go over the edge with her. In that instant, I didn’t fucking care. I just wanted.

  My lips brushed Lila’s. She let out a breath that drove me wild. I knew how good she’d taste. Sweet as sin.

  My arm went around her waist and she grew pliant in my arms. Every nerve ending in me lit on fire. Too much. Too fast. So good.

  Then the blaring ring of my cell phone jarred my body. I went rigid and stepped back. It was Ramona’s ringtone. She never called me like this unless it was something dire.

  Lila stepped back, sheepish. She put the back of her hand to her lips.

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “I’ve got to take this.”

  Lila nodded, drew the ends of my jacket around her like a shield, and faced the water.

  “Hey,” I said, answering the phone. Ramona’s heavy sigh on the other end pulled me back into myself.

  “I’m sorry, Beckett,” she said. “You know I wouldn’t have bothered you if …”

  “I know. Just spit it out, Ramona. Is it Garnett?”

  “What? Oh. No. Someone’s here to see you. He just showed up. I stayed late to catch up on some paperwork and he kind of burst in …”

  I heard yelling in the background. A voice I hadn’t heard in eight years. It cut straight through me, straight from my night terrors. No. It couldn’t be.

  “Is that him?” I heard him say. Ramona muffled the phone, trying to calm my visitor down. “Finch!”

  I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. “Ramona, just try to keep him calm. Tell him I’m on my way.”

  I hung up the phone and caught Lila’s eye. “I’m sorry,” I said. “I have to take care of this. I’ll drop you off at your place along the way.”

  Chapter Six

  Beckett

  I parked in front of Lila’s shop and walked her to the front door. Things were dark and quiet on Main Street. I waved to Deputy Penn as he sat in his cruiser in front of Garnett’s Treasures. She was having new glass installed tomorrow but for now she had two gaping holes covered by a black tarp for a storefront.

  “I can take it from here,” Lila said. She still had my jacket around her shoulders. As she let it slip, I reached for her and repositioned it.

  “Keep it,” I said. “It looks good on you. I’ll get it from you later. It’ll give you a reason to agree to a rain check on the rest of our night.”

  “The rest?” She raised a brow. That same simmering heat hadn’t left my bones. I felt torn in two. Everything in me wanted to stay right here with her and see where this led. But the desperation in the voice I heard during Ramona’s call gutted me too.

  “I really am sorry I have to cut this short.”

  “I get it,” she said. “You’re a cop, Beckett. You’re never off duty.” She laid a flat hand on my chest and went up on her tiptoes. I leaned down and kissed her. It wasn’t deep the way I wanted. It was chaste, just her lips brushing mine.

  “We should probably be careful anyway,” I said.

  “Right. Don’t want tongues to wag too hard around here. Considering I’m still a suspect and all.”

  My throat ran dry. “I didn’t mean that. You’re not. Just don’t pay any mind to Garnett. I’ll help you figure out a way to deal with her later. Promise.”

  “Don’t worry about me, Sheriff. I’m resourceful. And I’m not going to let one little old lady with an ax to grind push me around. I’ll handle Garnett.”

  I scratched my chin. “Honestly? For now I’d really just like you to stay away from her. Let her settle down on her own. She will. I’ve seen this before.”

  Lila gave me a salute then turned to put her key in the lock. Damn. I didn’t want to leave her. Part of it had to do with my churning desire. Well, most of it. But I also didn’t like her staying here tonight. We had no good leads on the break-in and Lila’s store sat too close for comfort. I made a mental note to have Penn call in another cruiser to watch Lila’s place. Even though somebody would have to be the world’s dumbest criminal to hit another business downtown tonight. Everyone was watching, not just my deputies.

  My phone vibrated in my pocket again. I didn’t need to check the caller ID to know it would be Ramona. I’d delayed too long already. I just prayed she’d live up to the faith I put in her and keep the situation under control until I got there. I owed her. For that and so much more.

  “Good night, Beckett,” Lila said, turning to look at me over her shoulder. The moonlight made her glow. I stepped back. Damn, if she wasn’t one of the most beautiful women I’d ever seen.

  “Take care, Lila. I’ll try to stop in for coffee in the morning.”

  As she closed the door behind her, dread clouded my heart. It was time to get back to the station and put out the next fire.

  I parked my truck next to Ramona’s car. A beat-up Harley sat an angle near the dumpster. If I’d had any doubts who showed up tonight, they fell away at the sight of it. I took a steeling breath and keyed myself through the back door.

  “He’ll be right over.” Ramona sounded tired, exasperated. I brushed past two of my deputies in the hallway heading to the bullpen. They gave me quick nods of acknowledgment then turned to each other. My visitor had drawn attention throughout the building.

  I rounded the corner. Ramona sat on the edge of her desk with her back to me. At the desk beside her, a man sat hunched over with his face in his hands. His blond hair hung long past his shoulders in greasy strings. Dirt covered his scraped knuckles.

  He lifted his head as he heard me approach. Two coal-black eyes met mine, filling with recognition and relief.

  “Beckett,” he said, his voice raspy. It brought me right back to that hidden compound deep in the valley of the Hindu Kush Mountains. Hot. Sweaty. Sand choking me.

  “Hey, Henny,” I said, forcing myself back to the here and now. “What’s going on?” I caught Ramona’s eyes. I made a downward gesture with my hand. It was okay. I had this from here. Pushing through the gate, I put a hand on Ramona’s back. I gave her a grim nod of thanks. She raised a brow but grabbed her purse.

  “You sure?” she whispered. “I can call …”

  I put a hand up. “Go on home, Ramona. You must be bone tired. Henny and I are just going to have a chat. I’ll make sure he gets to where he’s going all right.”

  Where he was going? God knew where that would be. I hadn’t seen Henny in eight years. Not since … No. I couldn’t think of it now. I couldn’t go back there.

  I waited for Ramona to gather her things and leave. She gave me one last uncertain look, then disappeared down the hallway leaving Petty Officer First Class Jed Henson and me alone. He rose slowly, his bloodshot eyes settling on me.

  “I didn’t think you’d come,” he said.

  He’d changed so much. The Jed Henson I knew had been tall, strong, built like a linebacker with wide shoulders and biceps as big as some men’s thighs. Now, he’d lost probably sixty pounds. His clothes hung off him. A vein bulged in Henny’s temple. He was pale. Skinny. Wrecked.

  God help me, I was afraid to touch him. Afraid the demons gripping him would latch on to me and drag me down to where they held Henny. No. I couldn’t afford that. Not now. Not ever again. I also hated myself for thinking that. Because Henny was here. I was the only one in the world who knew his demons by name. I’d been there the day they were born, after all.

  Henny sniffled, wiping the back of his hand over his face. “Hell of a setup you’ve got here,” he said, finding a weak smile. A little of the old bullshitter I knew a
nd used to love came back.

  “It’s all right. It’s quiet. Most of the time.”

  Henny nodded. “I think I scared your girl. I didn’t mean to. Can’t blame her. She thought I was just some bum off the street.”

  I laughed. “Well, she was right, wasn’t she?”

  Smiling, Henny shot me a middle finger. This was better. In a flash, he became more himself. What was it though? Drugs? Booze? Henny was strung out on something. No way he would have ever come here if he wasn’t. We’d made promises to each other.

  “Can we get out of here?” he asked. “This place makes me jumpy. You got cages down that hallway.”

  “It’s just a holding cell, Henny. They’re empty right now. Crystal Falls is a pretty peaceful town. Most of the time, it’ll just be the occasional drunk needing to sleep something off. But yeah, we can get out of here. Where are you staying?”

  He locked eyes with me, sniffling again. “Nowhere, Beckett. Everywhere. Spent the last couple of years near Reno. I got a job as a bouncer in one of the casinos. Good money. Steady. Even had a girl for a while. Emma. You’d like her.”

  “A girl? You? She charge by the hour?” Henny’s laugh held no joy. I regretted the joke just a little, but Henny shrugged it off. I stopped myself from asking what happened to Emma. The pain in his face gave me all the answers I needed.

  “Well, I gotta place just a couple of miles from here,” I said. “Come on. Your bike’s safe here for the night. I’ll drive you back in the morning. We can visit. Catch up. That’s what you’re here for, right?”

  Henny stiffened, his step faltering as we walked down the hall. But he straightened quick enough and followed me out. He grew stone silent as I led him to my pick-up. He stayed that way as he climbed inside and we drove away from the station. It was my last question that brought him to a halt. I knew in my heart the answer to it could bring my world crashing down just as hard.

  I parked in the garage. There was no small talk between us as I led Henny through the house, grabbing two bottles of Bud. He followed me to the back porch. I’d built a stone barbecue and pizza oven out here just off the deck. The yard opened up to a field that stretched for miles. My property abutted a cattle ranch and you could hear the steers bellowing in the distance.

  Henny took a seat in a folding chair beside me and fingered the neck of his beer bottle. He took his time with it, drinking almost absently. So, it wasn’t booze making him shake like that.

  I cut right to it. “You seeing someone, Henny? Talking to anybody about ... any of it?”

  He let out a bitter laugh and took a drink. He wouldn’t meet my eyes. “It’s nice out here, Beckett. Like you said. Quiet. Peaceful. Jesus, you’ve got fucking cows in your backyard. Tumbleweeds. They let you carry bullets in that piece you wear?”

  I laughed with him. “Just the one,” I answered. “I keep it in my shirt pocket for emergencies.”

  Henny shook his head. “How much they pay you?”

  “Not a lot. Probably about the same as bouncing. But I’ve got a health plan, dental, a pension. It pays the bills.”

  “And they respect you,” Henny said, putting heavy emphasis on the word respect. “Sheriff Finch. Unbelievable.”

  “Technically, it’s Deputy Sheriff. But, like anything else, I’ve had to earn their respect. Crystal Falls is a small, quiet town, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t come with problems.”

  “Politics,” Henny said, drawing out the syllables. “Look at you, Beckett. You gonna run for mayor?”

  I took a drink. “I like the job I have just fine for now.”

  It was getting so late it was early. In another couple of hours, the sun would rise. I knew we’d likely sit out here all night. I wasn’t tired. Far from it. My nerves buzzed, on edge.

  “Mayor Finch. You’d probably win in a landslide, right? I want to see the billboards.”

  “Henny, I told you. I like the job I have just fine. I’m not looking for another one.”

  He nodded. “You hiring? I mean ... I saw that deputy sitting in that cruiser when we rode through town. You said yourself. You get drunks sleeping it off. It doesn’t sound too bad, Beckett. You know me.”

  It got hard to swallow. It was too much. Just having Henny here changed the air. Laghman Province was right in front of me. I could smell it. Taste it. I started to sweat.

  “Is that why you’re here?” I asked. “You’re looking for a job? I don’t know, Henny. I’m not sure you’re suited for Crystal Falls. I know you. You like the noise. The speed. But maybe I could make some calls. If you like Reno, I could …”

  Henny put his hands over his ears and doubled over. “I want it to be quiet. It never is. You know that. I hear their voices all the time. Don’t you?”

  No. I wouldn’t. I couldn’t. I wouldn’t let Henny’s demons drag me down or wake my own. The cells we’d walked by at the station were just what I’d said. They were nothing like those dank, dirty hellholes they threw him in. I didn’t hear the screams anymore. Not there. Not here.

  “How’d you do it?” Henny turned to me, tears streaming down his face. “Tell me. I need to know. How’d you find a way to be normal after …”

  I stiffened. “I’m not normal, Henny. Nobody is. At least not in the way normal felt before … It’s just new, different. And it’s day by day. Hour by hour. If you need help, someone to talk to, I can …”

  “I’ve done all of that. Gone to the meetings. Said the words. It doesn’t work. Why doesn’t it work?”

  “You have to give it time.”

  “It’s been eight years! Do you know why I’m here? You think it’s cuz I thought you’d give me a job?”

  I finished the last of my beer. “I don’t know, Henny. I guess. I mean, I understand if …”

  “When’s the last time you talked to Brady, huh?” The name cut through me like ice.

  Brady, Henny, Beckett, Connor. Meathead. Powell. Jody. Tully. Our team. Our platoon. One mission. Powell, Jody, Tully, and Meathead died in the desert after that first blast. Henny and Brady were taken captive. Only Connor and I got clear. Henny and Brady suffered the worst and we couldn’t talk about it, not even to each other. If he brought it up now …

  “Not since the last time I talked to you,” I said.

  “Yeah, me neither. Until he called me three days ago. I don’t even know how he got my phone number. My sister, I guess.”

  Ah. No wonder Henny was so messed up. Of the three of us, Brady was strung the tightest. Even worse than Henny. God knew what he could have said to him.

  “Look, whatever Brady said, you gotta just let it roll off your back. Don’t let it pull you back. We got you out. We’re alive. It might not feel like it all the time, but you’re whole, Henny. You have a life.”

  Tears fell down his cheeks. Henny let out a choked sound that cut through me. “He blew his brains out, Beckett. Right on the other end of the damn phone. He told me he was gonna do it and he did. I heard it all. He wanted to make sure. Brady’s dead. We’re all that’s left.”

  His choked sob cut through me and my blood turned to ice. Brady. Brady was dead. Henny crumpled, holding his face in his hands. I went on autopilot, reaching for him. I grabbed his shoulder and squeezed.

  Connor died beside me. He’d thrown his body over Brady’s to save him. Now Brady was gone anyway. We were all that was left. Henny and me. I knew in my heart Henny wouldn’t last long. He might not survive. And then the demons would have no one to haunt but me.

  Chapter Seven

  Lila

  I wish I could say things blew over after the break-in at Garnett’s Treasures. But nearly two weeks later, and I saw a definite dip in business. So much so, I had to cut Arlene’s hours back. Tuesday morning, and I had four people at the counter and a booth of three in the back.

  “It’ll pick up,” Addy said. She had powdered sugar on her nose. I reached over with a towel and wiped it off.

  “I hope so.”

  “Have faith. We got a rush of
curiosity seekers a couple of weeks ago. Now let word of mouth kick in.”

  I raised a skeptical brow. Word of mouth is exactly what I was afraid of. Garnett Morris’s mouth, in particular. I bit my lip, trying hard not to think ill of her. She was an old, strong lady, set in her ways. If I didn’t let her wear me down, I had a strong hunch I could eventually earn her respect. At least ... I hoped.

  In the meantime, I did what I usually did when something stressed me out. I baked. While Addy had the dining room firmly under control, I went to work out a macaron experiment I’d been itching to try.

  The kitchen was my solace, my church, my meditation. It had been since I was tall enough to reach the knobs on the oven. My grandmother had taught me how to use it. For so long, it had been just the two of us while my mother was on tour. She was a dancer. She’d spent a year as a Rockette before I was born. Until I was seven, she spent most of her time on the road, dancing in the chorus of various touring companies of the hit Broadway shows of the time. Then, on my seventh birthday, she came home and never left again.

  Addy’s strong voice pulled me out of my head. She was laughing, but it seemed forced. I don’t know why it set off my alarm bells, but it did. I wiped my hands on my apron, smoothed my hair back into place, and left the kitchen.

  There were four of them. They’d chosen the counter, sitting shoulder to shoulder. Their dark-gray tailored suits were almost identical. Broad-shouldered men, expensive haircuts, steely eyes. One of them was getting a little handsy with Addy. She was handling it all right, but the air left my lungs. These were Tommy’s men.

  One of them reached over the counter and helped himself to a donut. Addy’s plastered-on smile flickered as she met my eyes. The customers in the booth looked uneasy as they stared at the men at the counter.

  “Scones on special,” I said brightly. My eyes darted toward the front door. Was Tommy with them? Would he be so bold to just march in the front door in broad daylight? Crystal Falls was a small town, barely on the map. That didn’t mean someone wouldn’t recognize Tommy Kelly from the news and draw their own conclusions.