Forbidden Spirits

by Patricia Watters

  Rose shrugged. "It's just that I wasn't planning on getting into this now because with your present mindset you wouldn't give it any credibility."

  "I told you I'm trying to understand you," Tyler said, "so tell me. I'm listening."

  Rose took a long breath to settle her heartbeat, which had more to do with sharing something with Tyler that she wasn't ready to share with him, than his nearness, and started in. "When I was thirteen my grandmother told me that if I lived a pure life, my one true love would come to me in a dream, and he'd have long hair and be riding on the backs of white horses. The morning I slept on the beach I was just coming out of a deep sleep when I saw you running your horses in the surf. I thought I was having a lucid dream, which is when you're dreaming and you know it's a dream. It was so disturbing, I went to the spring with my incense to try and get some answers as to why the dream came when it did, and when I stepped out of the cavern, there you were with your long hair, and later, when I saw you in the meadow standing on the backs of your mares, it was like in the dream, except that it never was a dream."

  "Then what your grandmother told you hasn't come true because you were never dreaming," Tyler pointed out. "But here I am. That should mean something."

  "I know, but it's confusing," Rose said, in all honesty. "Maybe the dream will still come and this is just A and B of the domino effect."

  "Then I'll fill in C and D," Tyler said. "C was when you went to the spring, where we first met, and D was when something led you to the meadow where I was working my mares so you'd know I was your one true love, and we're here together tonight to reaffirm that."

  "That's your take on it," Rose said, her heart beating heavily at what Tyler had just said, in effect telling her he loved her, in a roundabout way. "But I still haven't had the dream, and now I need to figure out what Tundra's message to me is."

  "Okay then what about this," Tyler said. "I read that a lone wolf in the wild symbolizes freedom, while a wolf in a pack symbolizes community, so when a wolf comes to you alone or in a pack it's asking you to acquire the same state in your own life, so since Tundra came to you as a lone wolf, his message is for you to separate from your family and allow yourself to be a part of someone else's life. Mine."

  "But you've also separated yourself from your family," Rose said. "Where does that fit into the scheme of things?"

  "It's simple," Tyler replied. "We're the new alpha pair. We no longer have to be connected to our families except as a new pack in the area."

  "So in essence, you're saying we should get married," Rose said.

  "I'm not sure what I'm saying," Tyler replied. "I'm just trying to make sense of your belief in animal guides, and I'm thinking maybe there's something to it."

  Rose wasn't sure what to make of what Tyler was saying because talking about marriage was even more premature than getting into a committed relationship, but she couldn't deny that his reasoning behind it was sound. "What you said was logical, but way too early to act on, but maybe you're on the right track about interpreting things."

  "You mean about us destined to be the new alpha pair?" Tyler asked.

  "I don't know," Rose replied. "It makes sense, yet it doesn't."

  "Then I say we shove it all aside and spend a little time doing this." Tyler pulled her down with him to lay together on a bed of grass and closed his arms around her. The long kiss that followed had Rose's heart pumping, and her mind racing, and her arms tightening around Tyler, and as the kiss deepened into an open-mouth kiss, Rose couldn't help feeling that they were destined to be together, but she refused to let that happen until Tyler embraced at least some of her core beliefs in his heart, and he was a long way from that.

  Struggling to regain her self-control, she broke the kiss, and said, in a breathless voice, "We've got to stop being so impulsive and untimely. We're both rushing into something we shouldn't, and neither of us is putting on the skids."

  "You just put on the skids," Tyler said.

  "Just barely," Rose replied. "Just because you've done some studying on animal spirit guides doesn't mean you go along with it, and reading about something, and taking it into your heart are two different things, which brings us back to Whispering Springs and your drilling into the mountain. After reading about animal spirit guides, did that change your mind at all?"

  Tyler pulled her back into his arms, and said, "I'm thinking about it."

  "Thinking about what? Continuing to drill, or stopping?"

  "I told you, I want to drill a couple more hours, then I'll quit."

  "Will you at least do one thing before you start drilling again?" Rose said.

  "If it's reasonable, maybe," Tyler replied. "What do you want me to do?"

  "Sit in the pool long enough to hear the voices, and during that time block out everything in your mind so it will be cleared of the jumble of thoughts that make it difficult to communicate."

  "I guarantee, if I sit in that pool and try to block out my mind, I'll see you sitting in the pool too and no way will my mind go blank," Tyler replied. "It would be impossible."

  "Then light some incense and concentrate on the smoke swirling out of it and try it that way," Rose said. "If you'd just open your mind, you'd learn that spirits can be talked to and communicated with, not like voices coming out of the cavern, but as profound and meaningful thoughts that come to you that you never expected, thoughts that give you direction in life, but in order for that to happen you first have to free your mind of outside distractions. The fewer distractions, the easier it is to make contact with spirits and communicate with them."

  Tyler cuddled her close, and said, "Okay, I'll give it a try, but I can tell you right off, it's not going to work. Even now I imagine you sitting in the pool, and that scene has been playing over and over in my head since the day I saw you, and it's not going to stop when I'm there because I'll be imagining you sitting with me, and I won't be picturing the back of you when I do. Do you see the problem I'm facing?"

  When Rose didn't reply, because she honestly did understand his dilemma, Tyler said, "Honey, I'm trying. I really am, and I'll do my best and see what comes of it."

  His endearment had Rose rationalizing that maybe the divide between them wasn't so wide. She could imagine expanding his quarters and living there with him, and she could look out the window and see him working with his mares, and they could fix up a small studio where she could make her baskets, and all around would be hazelnut trees, and maidenhair ferns, and bear grass. And in the summer they'd sleep under the stars in one big sleeping bag, enfolded in each other's arms. And their kids would grow up like little children of nature, who'd study the habits of birds and insects and animals, and from Tyler they'd learn how to communicate with animals, and from her they'd learn about Indian traditions and their ancient heritage.

  But then the day would come when they'd start to ask deeper questions. What are spirits? Can we see them? Where are they? Do they talk to us? Why doesn't Daddy believe in them?

  And Rose knew that the divide was as wide as ever.

  CHAPTER 13

  Shortly after dawn, Tyler hefted the rock drill so it hung from his shoulder by a wide, canvas strap and stepped out of the stable. As he started across the pasture toward the trail he'd made through the woods to Whispering Springs, he felt something strike the back of his head. When he turned to see what it was, he saw Diana flying off. Realizing he'd stepped into the flight path between her and her prey, he dismissed the incident and continued walking toward the trail.

  Fifteen minutes later, he stripped off his clothes and climbed into the pool and sat back and tried his best to blank out his mind while waiting for the sounds to start, if only because he'd promised Rose he would. But as he'd predicted, his mind was far from blank, and he knew that however long he'd sit there, the streams of images of Rose in the pool with him, while his hands traced all the contours of her naked body would not go away.

  Eventually the sounds came, but by then he was too aroused to think of an
ything but the obvious, so deciding it made more sense to get on with the real reason he was there, which wasn't to listen to non-existent spirits, he dried off and dressed, then moved to the area where he'd been drilling before. After stuffing in his ear plugs, he strapped on his head lantern, set the drill bit into the fissure that he'd been opening, and started in.

  He was in the process of widening the fissure when he began to feel lightheaded. Taking a deep breath, he held it for a few seconds and let it out slowly and took another deep breath, and gradually the lightness passed. He knew the hawk hadn't hit him hard enough to cause dizziness, so he chalked it up to having not eaten before he left, then started up the drill and continued.

  During the next hour he made good progress, and after a while he thought he felt air coming out of the opening. Cutting the engine, he set the drill down and began moving rock fragments aside. Once he'd cleared away the rubble, he put his face to the opening and there was definitely cool air against his skin. Energized, he started again, this time more aggressively, and after a few minutes, to his surprise, a section of the cave floor, about eighteen inches in diameter, tilted.

  He cut the engine and set the drill aside and lifted the slab of rock out of the way and was stunned to find what looked to be a narrow passageway, like a natural tunnel running beneath the floor of the cavern. Lying flat on his stomach, he lowered his head into the hole, and with the beam of light from his head lantern, saw that the passageway continued some distance into the mountain. The hole was too small to crawl into, but if he widened the opening, he could at least see how far back into the mountain the passageway went.

  Feeling lightheaded again, which this time he attributed to having his head down the hole, he sat back on his heels and breathed deeply several times and waited for the lightness to pass, but unlike before, it didn't pass. Instead, the cave walls and floor and all around him looked as if they were slowly moving. Closing his eyes, he continued breathing deeply, but the dizziness remained and not only were the surroundings continuing to move, his stomach felt queasy. Before leaving, however, he put the slab of rock back as best he could and hoped no one would come before he could get back. Later he'd return and listen to the sounds to see if they'd changed, but for now, all he wanted was to get back to his place. But as he hefted the drill onto his shoulder and turned to leave, it wasn't the queasiness in his stomach and the continued dizziness that filled his mind, but the memory of Rose as she looked the last time she was in the cavern with him, along with her words of warning…

  …you just can't go around challenging spirits that way…

  He could dismiss the words, but the look of worry on Rose's face when she'd said them, along with the realization that she truly cared about him, stayed with him.

  As for the dizziness, he'd make sure he ate before starting in again. His excitement and anticipation, along with hanging onto a fifty-pound rock drill that had been doing its best to be free of him, took energy and calories. Basic human physiology. But for now, all he wanted was to get back to his place and lie down and let the world stop spinning.

  ***

  As Rose headed up the road to Tyler's place, she knew he'd be angry when he learned that she'd contacted Marc, but he left her no choice. He had no intention of stopping what he was doing at the spring, and having Marc designate it a sacred place would put an end to Tyler's drilling, along with the threat of turning it into a geothermal power source for the ranch. More than that, she was worried about Tyler and the consequences he could face by continuing to desecrate a sacred place.

  Over the past few weeks her feelings for him had deepened in a way she could never have imagined the first day they met, and now his presence filled her heart with joy and his absence filled her mind with romantic scenarios of sleeping under the stars and living a simple life up on his mountain, and watching him with his mares, especially that, because she loved to see the tenderness he expressed with them, and the way they responded to him. If he used the same gentleness, patience and understanding with children as he did with his mares, he'd be a gem of a father. That is, if he'd still be talking to her after he learned what she'd done.

  She called Marc the night before, and after giving him an update on how things were going at the museum, she focused on the real reason she'd called. She started in by explaining Tyler's theory on trapped geysers, but when Marc heard the words, 'opening fissures in the floor of the cavern with a rock drill,' he cut her off short and said he'd be there the next day, which was why she was on her way to alert Tyler about what she'd done, before he heard it firsthand from Marc, because Marc was steaming mad.

  She'd hoped to talk to Tyler earlier, but it was the first day of her basketweaving workshop, and that was followed by a church youth group field trip, but since she hadn't seen Marc's truck pull in, she knew he hadn't yet arrived, but could at any time.

  As she approached Tyler's place, the first thing she noticed was that the mares were standing in a huddle looking toward the stable. On the ground near where they stood was Tyler's whip, like he'd dropped it there, and his shirt was tossed over the railing of the corral and hanging askew with one sleeve dragging the ground, like he'd stripped it off in a hurry. She noticed that the hawk wasn't on the post, so she wondered if she actually had left, but then she saw her glide in on a wind current and land on a tall Douglas fir on the other side of the stables.

  Sensing that something was drastically wrong, Rose hurried into the stable and down the passageway. Finding the door to Tyler's quarters wide open, she entered, and when Tyler wasn't there, she looked into his bedroom and found him sprawled out on his back in bed, stripped to the waist, with his arm flopped over his eyes.

  "Are you okay?" she asked. "Did something happen?"

  "Nothing I can't handle," Tyler replied.

  When Tyler remained where he was and offered no explanation as to why he was lying in bed, Rose said, "The mares are standing in a group looking this way like you left suddenly."

  "That's because I did," Tyler replied.

  Rose walked up to the bed and looked down at the broad expanse of Tyler's chest and saw that it was damp with perspiration, yet it wasn't a hot day. Placing her hand on his bare shoulder, she said, "You're not well. What's going on?"

  "I'm fine," Tyler replied. "Just a little dizzy."

  Rose lifted his arm away from his eyes and looked at him. He stared back for a moment, then pulled his arm free and flopped it over his eyes again.

  "I saw your whip in the pasture and your shirt hanging on the corral so I assume the dizziness started while you were working with the horses," Rose said.

  "Something like that," Tyler replied. "Why are you here?"

  "I came to tell you that…" Rose stopped, deciding not to spring it on him that Marc was on his way. Not only was Tyler dizzy for some unexplained reason, but from his obvious annoyance with her being there, and his clipped, dry responses to her questions, she suspected he was hiding something, and she wanted to learn what it was before telling him about Marc…

  "You wanted to tell me what?" Tyler asked. He removed his arm from his eyes and looked at her, and waited.

  "That… I just came to see you, but now I'm worried." Rose sat on the side of the bed and placed her hand on Tyler's chest and felt the dampness. "You're sweating and dizzy and you need to see a doctor. I'll drive you there."

  "No doctor," Tyler said.

  Rose glanced out the window and saw the hawk sitting on a limb, looking their way. Granna would have said that the hawk's behavior was part of her message and should be interpreted, so she said to Tyler, "Diana returned. She's sitting on a tree outside your window."

  "She came back for meat scraps and since I'm not feeding her she's sitting where she can see the field and watch for mice."

  "She's not looking at the field, she's looking this way, like she's trying to get your attention and let you know she's still here," Rose said. "Did something happen with her?"

  When Tyler's eyes sharpened, Ro
se knew she'd hit on something. She waited silently, and after a few moments, Tyler drew in an agitated breath, and said, "Okay, since I can see you're not going to drop it, when I was walking across the pasture I got in the path between her and her prey and she hit me in back of my head, but her talons were turned in so it wasn't an attack."

  "If she didn't have her talons forward, she wasn't after prey either," Rose pointed out.

  "Okay, then I got in her flight path," Tyler grumbled. "Don't try to make anything more of it." He flopped his arm over his eyes again.

  Rose stared at his well-muscled arm and the tightly closed jaws beneath his bent elbow and felt like shaking the man, he was so closed-minded. "I don't have to make anything more of it because Diana already did it for me," she said. "By hitting you in the head, she was saying to you, 'pay attention, you're not listening,' and you can't keep ignoring this. Besides, she could have hit you hard enough to cause a concussion, so you need to see a doctor."

  "She didn't hit me hard enough to do anything, and the dizziness didn't start until later," Tyler said in a muffled voice because his mouth was partially covered by his arm.

  "So the dizziness started before you were working the horses today?" Rose asked.

  "Maybe during. I don't know. They weren't responsive because I was dizzy," Tyler said.

  "Do you mean they weren't responsive, like they didn't understand what you wanted them to do, or was it that they just wouldn't do what you wanted?" Rose asked.

  "It's me not them, so just drop it," Tyler groused.

  Rose could understand why Tyler was confused because of dizziness, and the horses, having picked up on that, could have been confused, but she didn't understand why Tyler seemed irritated with her. But before she could pump him with any more questions, they were distracted by the sound of footsteps in the passageway, and moments later, Marc stormed into the bedroom.

  He stopped abruptly, startled to see her sitting on the bed and Tyler stretched out on it, stripped to the waist. Finding them together that way, Rose had no idea what Marc must be thinking, but she had little time to ruminate over it before Marc bellowed at Tyler, "What in hell do you think you're doing, drilling into the floor of Whispering Springs!"