Forbidden Spirits

by Patricia Watters

  Zak released her arm. "Then I'll see you when you're done."

  Tess nodded and turned toward camp. She almost welcomed the diversion of dealing with a bunch of obstinate men, if only to keep her mind off the fact that a man she'd once lusted after, and who she'd been unable to scrub from her mind, was living not more than a couple hundred feet from her, and time had done nothing to temper the white-hot flame that was once again building.

  ***

  It was dusk by the time Tess and the men finished moving equipment and setting up for cutting pole timber. When she dismissed the crew, she felt relieved. After seeing Zak, it had been difficult concentrating on the job. She had so many questions, the main one being why he'd left seven years ago without a word. But unless he volunteered the information, she wouldn't ask. Pride wouldn't allow her to do so.

  She also wondered how long he'd been staying at the cabin, and why he was there. It had always been understood that he'd eventually live with his family and work at the winery, which was almost sixty miles away. She also felt uncomfortable knowing he was so close, and she couldn't shake the feeling that going to his cabin was a serious mistake. If she was ever to rebuild her relationship with her father, Zak could not be a part of her life. Yet the subject of the property line had to be addressed.

  Weary and emotionally drained from a long trying day, she closed camp for the weekend and returned to her cabin. But instead of a bath intended to strip off dust, grime and forest debris, she immersed herself in a tub of warm water, leaned against the sloped porcelain back of the footed tub, and inhaled the fragrance of jasmine. She'd never used colognes or bath salts when she was seventeen because Zak didn't want her to wear scents of any kind, claiming he liked the smell of warm fresh woman, and he'd prove it to her by nuzzling her all over. Adam checking out Eve was the way he explained it. And she'd stretch out on a bed of moss at the grotto, or in the bed in his cabin, and let him do his exploration until neither of them could stand it any longer, at which time they'd settle into serious lovemaking. But Zak wasn't a consideration now, and she liked the hint of flowers on her skin. It also gave her a feeling of empowerment, going against what she knew Zak would expect of the Tess O'Reilly he'd left behind.

  After her bath she sorted through her clothes, debating what to wear. Seven years ago she would have worn tight jeans and a snug fitting shirt that emphasized her figure, because Zak liked her dressed that way, calling her his little logger lady. But he also liked it when they wore nothing but maple vines, or fern fronds when dressed like Adam and Eve. Her face flushed hot when she remembered one particular time at the grotto, when he was naked and aroused, and she'd draped a garland of columbine around his hips and teased him with the flower petals until he pulled her down on the mossy floor of the forest and finished the job she'd started...

  Shoving that image back into the recesses of her mind, she held up a black jersey with long sleeves and smoothed it against her chest as she peered into the mirror. Although Zak liked her dressed as his logger lady, David encouraged her to emphasize her femininity, claiming he liked her in black because, with her dark hair, it made her look mysterious.

  Without further deliberation, she tugged the jersey over her head, put on a pair of black slacks, and slipped her bare feet into some fake alligator flip flops. After dragging a brush through her hair, leaving it loose around her shoulders, she grabbed a flashlight and left.

  At Zak's cabin, she stepped onto the porch and knocked lightly.

  When Zak opened the door, he said nothing as his gaze moved slowly down the length of her, causing her breath to quicken and her cheeks to burn. Uncertain what to make of his silent perusal, she said in a clipped dry tone, "You suggested I come, so am I supposed to come in or not?"

  "Sorry," Zak replied. "I didn't mean to stare. It just seems strange seeing you dressed like that."

  He moved aside, and as she passed him, Tess caught the drift of men's aftershave, which surprised her. Zak never wore aftershave before. But maybe that was because she'd told him she wanted her Adam to smell like ferns and moss and whatever clung to him on the forest floor, and he'd laughed and promised to remain her nature boy. So, it seemed, turnabout was fair play. He was going against what she liked, just as she was doing with him.

  Once inside, she wondered what to say next. It had been so easy for them to talk before, but now, what was there to say to a man who promised her the world then walked out of her life, shattering her dreams without so much as an explanation?

  Zak broke the awkwardness by lifting a bottle of wine from a wooden rack, and saying, "You're over twenty-one now. Do you want a glass of wine? It's from my father's private stock."

  Tess eyed the bottle in Zak 's hand. It would seem strange drinking wine with Zak. Although they'd made love too many times to count, that same summer Zak never offered her wine because she was only seventeen. She never questioned why giving her alcohol was an issue with him, while having sex with an underage girl wasn't, because she didn't want him to have a reason to stop. The fact was, she'd been hoping to get pregnant that summer so she could tie Zak to her forever. But when he gave her the ring, and talked about them marrying as soon as she turned eighteen, she didn't worry anymore because she knew his love was forever...

  "Well?" Zak asked.

  "I suppose," Tess replied, but her gaze wasn't focused on the bottle Zak held up for her to see, but instead on his broad chest in the snug, long-sleeved white jersey. Not the kind of shirt she expected. Years before it would have been a worn denim work shirt, unless he was working in the afternoon when the sun was hot, and he'd be bare-chested. He'd been slimmer then, and she could see from the muscular contours beneath his shirt that his chest was thicker and his biceps more developed, as if he'd been working out. The patterns on his shirt were also different from what she might have expected, random designs in dark grays, like a giant tattoo.

  Catching the direction of her gaze, Zak glanced down at the shirt momentarily, then looked at her and said, "It's a Christmas gift from my brother, Vince. I thought it would be right for chopping my way through brush."

  "And the aftershave?" Tess asked, before she could stop herself.

  "I wore that to catch your notice," Zak replied.

  "It did, but it doesn't suit you," Tess said.

  He eyed her with amusement. "I could say the same about you in black, but I'd be lying."

  Tess shrugged. "My ex-husband liked me in black."

  "And you're still trying to please him?" Zak asked.

  "No," Tess replied. "It's the first thing I grabbed before coming here."

  "Good choice." Zak handed her a wine glass, and as he was filling it, Tess saw that he was pouring from a bottle with the distinctive black-and-gold de Neuville label with a gold ram's head on it. "My father's proud of this run," he said, setting the bottle down. "It's called Florencia. It won a gold medal at the national competition."

  Tess sipped the wine, and the bouquet filled her nostrils. "Why Florencia?" she asked, looking up at him.

  "It's Basque for high mountain flower," Zak replied. "It's made with flower petals, some from around… this area." He took a slow sip of wine while eyeing her steadily over the rim of his glass, his gaze intense, and she wondered if he was remembering the day he made the garland of flowers for her head from high mountain flowers, and the lovemaking that followed.

  Uncomfortable with his steady gaze, she lifted the bottle of wine from the table, and while studying the label, she said, "Then I assume you're working at the winery now?"

  "No, I'm in charge of Spencer Wildlife Park," Zak replied. "I help at the winery some, but my work at the park takes priority."

  "I don't understand," Tess said, looking up. "You always intended to work at the winery."

  "My degree's in wildlife management," Zak replied.

  Tess found that puzzling. Before, he'd had no interest in college. He'd grown up working in the winery and was expected to take over someday. But she also remembered Zak being
at odds with his father that summer. According to Zak, everything was either his father's way, or no way. Zak told her back then that moving into the cabin and signing on with Timber West was an escape. Maybe college had also been an escape...

  "Have you been here long?" she asked, an attempt at casual conversation, when what she wanted was to fire a barrage of questions at him: Why did you leave me without a word? Where did you go? Why didn't you come back? Why did you let me marry a man I didn't love?

  "About six weeks," Zak replied, "when I was appointed head of the wildlife park." He lifted the bottle she'd been clutching in her hands and tipped it toward her glass while saying, "We're in the process of reinstating the bald eagle in the Channel Islands. We'll be taking chicks from nests with twins and transporting them to California, but first I have to fly over established nests to see if they're occupied." He looked at her, curiously. "Do you still fly?"

  "Yes," Tess replied. "I no longer have a plane though. My husband got custody of it when we divorced, but my dad still has his. He said I could take it up if I wanted."

  "Then you're still certified?"

  Tess nodded. "That doesn't mean I fly. Right now Timber West is operating in the red, and flying costs money, so it will be a while before I go up again."

  "How about Sunday?"

  "What are you talking about?"

  "The park plane's in for an engine overhaul and I need to fly over some nests before the chicks fledge, and time's running out. Maybe you could take me up. The park has funds. I'd make it was worth your while."

  "Where do you want to go?" Tess asked, although she didn't know why. She had no intention of taking Zak up in her father's plane.

  "Just around the area," Zak replied. "I have nests pinpointed on a map. But I'd also like to touch down at the Pine Mountain ranger station and talk to the park ranger there. Do you know Ralph Tolsted?"

  "No," Tess replied, "but I know where the Pine Mountain station is. My dad and I flew over it a few times, even landed there once. Dad didn't like the landing strip though... said it was the shortest strip he'd ever used. Why Pine Mountain?"

  "I want to check a nest there and talk to Tolsted about others in the area," Zak replied. "Timing's everything right now. Most of the chicks are ready to fledge. It's pretty important work we're doing."

  Tess eyed him with indecision, then caught herself. There was no way she'd take him up. Zak now living in the cabin where her father found them was bad enough. Taking him up in her father's plane would set her relationship with her father back years if he found out, and she was home to try and close the rift between them...

  "It shouldn't take more than an hour... two at the most with a short stop at Pine Mountain," Zak said. "Besides, it will give me a chance to be piloted by the grown up version of the fourteen year old scrap of a girl who bragged years ago that she could fly a plane."

  Tess couldn't help smiling, which brought a smile from Zak, a smile she'd tried to hold in memory over the years. A smile that still made her heart flutter and her breath quicken. "I suppose it would be all right if it's not more than a couple of hours," she found herself saying, and refused to analyze why.

  "Good," Zak replied, "I'll owe you dinner when we get back."

  "Just pay for fuel and flying hours and we'll call it square," Tess said, wanting to make sure he understood her position with him now. No dinners. No cozy evenings in his cabin, or hers. No... nothing. Setting her wine glass aside, she stepped over to the dining table where she saw a map rolled out and held flat with four coffee mugs, and said, "So, show me where the surveyors claim the line runs."

  Zak stood behind her, so close, his chest brushed against her back and his breath wafted against the side of her face. Reaching around her, he said, while dragging his finger over the map, "Your cabin's here and this is the road that runs between your cabin and the camp." Moving his finger over, he said, "This is where one designated marker is, and the other is here." His finger stopped precisely on the grotto.

  "But our Ada... that is, the... old oak tree is a line marker," Tess said, "which puts the grotto clearly on Timber West land." In an instant, she was flooded with memories of hands exploring bodies, and toes curling against cool moss, and flesh against flesh, and forbidden desires. Forbidden because Zak had been twenty-one while she was only seventeen...

  After a stretch of awkward silence, Zak said, "According to the survey, Timber West land stops ten feet this side of the... oak. The trees your father cut are over here on our land." Zak moved his finger from the grotto.

  Tess released the breath she'd been holding and ducked from under Zak's arm, then stepped around the table, away from the distraction of having his arm around her, and his chest against her back, and his breath against her face, to where she could study the map more closely. As she did, to her dismay, she saw that the trees cut had clearly been on de Neuville land.

  "Okay, so maybe the survey's right," she conceded, "but I don't want to upset my father over four trees. I'll pay your father for them and make sure no more are cut. Just don't let your father do anything right now."

  "It's not that simple," Zak said. "My father's talking about stretching a fence along the line. He wants to graze sheep here, and this has to be resolved."

  "Can't you stall the fence work, or at least leave that area for later?" Tess asked. "My father's health it frail right now and I don't want this upsetting him."

  Zak sighed. "I'll see what I can do. Meanwhile, have your men haul the trees back to our place, and I'll tell my father that your father inadvertently logged on our land and no more trees will be cut. With luck, my father will drop the issue." He removed the mugs and rolled up the map and offered it to her, saying, "Show it to your father so he can see where the line runs. That should settle it."

  Tess shook her head. "I'll pay for the trees and make sure no more are cut."

  "I suppose," Tess replied, "but I don't want my father to know. It would only upset him."

  Zak started slowly around the table, and she found herself standing planted to the floor and not moving as he said to her, "I won't say anything, and it shouldn't take more than a couple of hours." As he continued toward her, Tess realized he intended to kiss her. The years hadn't dimmed her memory of the look he got. It started with his eyes. Dark. Intense. Focused on her mouth. Then his nostrils flared. And the muscles in his jaws bunched. And his lips parted as he moved toward her. And his hands came up to take her arms...

  "Don't," she said, turning her face away. "Before I take you up in my father's plane, I want to make sure we understand each other."

  Zak removed his hands from her shoulders. "I was just trying to break some ice," he replied, and took a step back.

  Ignoring his comment, Tess said, "I'll pick you up around two on Sunday." Turning from him, she grabbed her flashlight, clicked it on and dashed into the darkness.

  As she made her way back to her cabin, she considered the ramifications of taking Zak up in her father's plane. He'd be furious if he knew, but it would only be for two hours, so she'd keep it from him. He didn't need that stress.

  She also knew that Zak had the same effect on her as in the past. Nothing had changed. But after Sunday's flight, there would be no more dealings with him. He'd left her once. He'd leave her again. There was no place in her life for Zak de Neuville now.

  CHAPTER 3

  The following day, Tess walked up the bank of stairs leading to the front porch of the house in Baker’s Creek where she grew up, and when she stepped into the living room, she detected the unmistakable aroma of cinnamon and warm yeast. Her Aunt Ella met her at the door. "Hi, sweetie," she said. "You'd better go into the kitchen and assure your father that you got through your first day at camp in one piece. He's been in a stew all morning waiting to hear from you."

  "How's he doing otherwise?" Tess asked.

  Ella pursed her lips. "He's as cantankerous as an old dog. I only put up with him because I know underneath that crusty exterior he's soft as a kit
ten."

  Tess laughed. "Did you give him what for, for going to the camp yesterday?"

  "You better believe I did," Ella said. "I turn my back for a couple of hours and he's off. Well, he's not getting away today and I let him know."

  Tess followed her aunt through the dining room. "How is he taking it?"

  Ella glanced back. "He grumbled something about domineering women, and I reminded him it was a matter of survival of the fittest." She tapped her brother's shoulder on the way to the stove. "Tess is here." She set a platter with scrambled eggs and hash browns in the middle of the table, then slipped on oven mitts and lifted a tray of fresh baked cinnamon rolls out of the oven and set them on a hot pad beside the platter of eggs and hash browns.

  Tess kissed her father on the forehead, and said, while pulling out a chair adjacent to him, "Well, I survived my first day at Timber West."

  "Did you have any problem with Jed Swenson?" Gib asked, while serving himself from the platter.

  "No, he never showed up," Tess replied. She reached for a cinnamon roll. "Am I supposed to put up with behavior like that, or can I fire him?"

  A worried frown creased Gib's brow. "Don't be too quick to do that," he said. "Swenson's a good worker... knows logging and equipment, but he can be kind of stubborn at times."

  Ella let out a chuckle. "If that's not the pot calling the kettle black."

  Tess winked at her aunt, then said to her father, "Swenson wasn't at the meeting in the cook shack or at my office later, as I requested. He's openly defying me. Do you put up with that?"

  "I haven't been around him that much," Gib said. "I hired him a few weeks before my heart attack and I was lucky to get him. Before you fire him, you'd better have someone in mind who'll step in. Word's out that Carl Yaeger's about to buy the tract between Timber West and the ridge, and if he does, he'll be hiring. If you get rid of Swenson you might find yourself without a woods boss, and no one to take his place."