Crystal Fire

by Jordan Dane

  Oliver sighed and wasn’t sure he could finish.

  “You helped Ashley for a while, but she couldn’t dodge her life. She committed suicide, Caila. That’s when you ran away from home. You couldn’t deal with what happened to her.”

  “No, that’s just...wrong. Ashley’s not dead. She just...moved away.” She shook her head and refused to look at him.

  “You took her bad memories and thought they were yours. You didn’t think you had people who loved you and a home, but you do.” He held out her file and waited for her to take it. “It’s all in here. Your gift has a name. It’s retrocognition. You can see past events, but you can also manipulate them. You plant memories like you did in me. Ashley’s death triggered you into a spiral you couldn’t get out of, but you can control it.”

  Oliver handed her the file, but she didn’t take it.

  “Your gift is why the Believers targeted you. They tracked you in L.A., especially after you crossed paths with Zack. After that, they backtracked where you came from and made this folder on you. It was only a matter of time before they picked you up, but now that we have your file, you’ll be safe here, Caila.”

  Oliver didn’t know how safe any Indigo was with the Believers still operating in secret, but that was his battle now.

  His quiet morning talks with Gabriel had settled his mind on any lingering loyalty he might have felt toward the doctor who had altered his gifts. Dr. Fiona hadn’t given him anything that wasn’t already in him. He didn’t owe her anything, not even the hatred he should’ve felt. He let it all go.

  He’d made up his mind to help Gabriel and the others, so kids like Caila could live a normal life. Even if he wanted to stay in touch with her and see how her life turned out, he couldn’t. That wouldn’t be safe for her.

  Caila took the file from him with her hands trembling. She saw the police report her mother and father had filed. She looked at photos of them in newspaper clippings. After Oliver had read her file, he went online to do more research and printed the pages for her. Her parents had even started a Facebook page and told her story in countless comments and prayers and pictures. That’s how he’d found out about Ashley.

  “My parents aren’t divorced?” She asked the question but didn’t wait for an answer.

  She pored through the records the church had carefully put together when they wanted to abduct her. They’d studied what they thought she could do, made notes in her file and taken surveillance photos. The pieces were coming together for her. He could see it.

  “Oh my God. My dad used to work in L.A. before we moved here. He was a freelance animator and worked for Disney. That’s why I hear the songs. I grew up hearing them. It’s why I did that thing to the doctor.”

  “Maybe those songs reminded you of home. Your real home.”

  As the puzzle of her life clicked into place, he saw it in her face and heard it in her voice. Hearing her say the words my dad and we meant that she’d found nuggets of truth in the information she read. Tears hit the paper until she finally stopped and looked at him.

  She was so happy. Her eyes were the color of a summer sky in Wyoming. In that moment, he saw the little girl she must’ve been—the sweet girl who only wanted to help her best friend, Ashley.

  “I love you, Oliver.” She hesitated. “I’m so...sorry for—”

  Oliver didn’t let her finish. He touched a finger to her lips and shook his head until she stopped. He couldn’t take his eyes off her. He wanted to remember her exactly like this. Caila reached for the jacket he had on and poked a finger through one of his button holes with her eyes shut tight.

  When she opened them, she said, “Please don’t get out of the car. Saying goodbye will be hard enough.”

  She didn’t wait for him to say a word. Maybe she didn’t need to know he felt the same...about everything. He took that as a good sign, that she’d accepted how things would be. If he had been standing next to her, not knowing what to do with his hands, he’d be too tempted to hold her and kiss her. That would make things worse. The girl didn’t need strings to start her new life, in a place that he hoped would keep her safe.

  After she got out of the car, she pulled her small bag from the backseat and set it on the curb. When he handed her Zack’s ashes, she placed her hand over his and took the small tin box.

  “Zack would’ve loved it here,” he said. “Find him a beautiful spot on the mountain and set him free. He really loved you, you know? I felt it.”

  He didn’t know if the love he felt for her had been Zack’s or his. That didn’t matter now.

  With shaky fingers pressed to her lips, she said goodbye to him without another word. Her eyes were filled with tears and his were too. When one broke free and rolled down his cheek, he didn’t wipe it away. Caila closed the car door and picked up her bag and Zack’s tin before she headed to the front door. Oliver waited until she knocked and the door opened.

  “Have a good life, Caila,” he whispered. “I love you too.”

  He waited until he saw Caila’s mother pull her missing daughter into her arms and bring her inside before he drove away and never looked back. He would have the love—and the life—she’d given him in a kiss. It would have to be enough.

  Caila was the first girl he ever loved. That’s how he always wanted to remember her.

  24

  Stewart Estate

  Days later

  Kendra had gotten up early, too restless to sleep another minute without seeing Rafael. Every morning was like that for her now. Ever since they’d found him alive, she felt as if she’d gotten a second chance to turn her life around—and she wanted Rafael to be more than a friend.

  She rushed to get ready. After her shower, she dressed in jeans, a lacy tank under a large plaid shirt and hiking boots. The clothes weren’t very girly, but they were comfortable. Instead of pulling back her hair, she let it fall loose to her shoulders and spent time in front of the mirror. She even put on a touch of makeup that she’d borrowed from Rayne. The last thing she put on was the infinity bracelet he’d given her.

  As she walked down the hallway, heading for Rafael’s room, she had nervous knots in her stomach. They felt wonderful and terrible all at the same time. She’d never felt more alive—and happy—but as she stepped softly by his room, she found his door ajar. She expected him to still be asleep, but his room looked empty.

  Rafael hadn’t fully recovered from the beating he’d endured at the hands of Gabriel’s father and his men. He walked with a limp and had a cut lip and a bruise under one eye. With Rafael, the outside would heal.

  It was the inside of him that would take longer.

  After getting a glimpse behind his mind shield—the frightening look he’d been brave enough to let her see—she knew he had good reason for how he would always be. She also knew that he was the strongest person she’d ever known because of it.

  Kendra pushed open his bedroom door and stepped inside his room. Rafael’s bed had been made and he was gone. He’d taken a shower. The air carried the aroma of herbal soap and the natural scent of Rafael that she’d grown addicted to.

  She sat on the edge of his mattress and grabbed one of his pillows. Kendra held it in her arms, breathed in the smell of his skin and thought of him. Closing her eyes, she sensed him with her and almost felt his warmth and the way his lips touched hers. But she didn’t have to imagine what that would feel like. She could have him, for real. After she put his pillow back, she ran her hands over the bed linens to fix what she’d messed up, and went looking for him.

  When she got to the dining room, she found the Effin brothers. They had huge bowls of cereal in front of them, filled to the top, and spoons the size of shovels.

  “Have you seen, Rafael?” she asked them.

  They looked at each other before they shrugged. Kendra narrowed her eyes at the twi
ns. The boys usually knew everything going on in the house, especially at this early hour. For them to only shrug, without their usual telepathic chatter, meant something was up. They didn’t make very good liars.

  When she plopped down next to them and stared them in the eye, they totally caved.

  Minutes later

  The twins only told her where she could find Rafael. With milk dribbled on their chins and lips pursed, the brothers refused to tell her anything else.

  Kendra ran out the first door she found and hugged her body against the morning chill of the Bristol Mountains. She crossed the stone patio and walked past the fountain where she’d first kissed Rafael after Benny’s funeral. The rush of memories quickened her steps, and her eyes searched for him as she followed a dirt path at the rear of the estate.

  With every step, she heard the lilt of a new melody that wrapped around her heart. As an Indigo, she felt the music had become a part of her since she was a child. But today the haunting unforgettable song was different from anything she’d ever heard before.

  After she stepped through an old stone archway that led beyond the walls of the estate, she found Rafael. When she saw what he was doing, she stopped to watch him. He wore jeans and a blue tank. His dark hair shone in the morning sun and his body glistened with sweat. He was hard at work, digging into the soil. From the looks of the ground and the shed nearby, she finally realized what he must’ve been working on for days.

  Rafael made a garden—for her.

  When she gasped and covered her mouth, Rafe turned.

  “I wanted it to be a surprise.”

  “It is,” she whispered. “Oh God. It is.”

  Kendra’s eyes filled when she saw what he had done. Hurt as he was, he’d spent hours cleaning up the old greenhouse on the estate and now was turning over the dark, rich-looking soil, preparing the ground to plant seeds.

  She’d been lost without her garden. Plants were her connection to the other Indigo souls she heard in her head. She sensed them best in her medicinal herbs and vegetables. After the Believers had destroyed the beautiful garden she had in the tunnels, she didn’t know where she would start a new one. Wherever it would be meant she’d found a new home.

  If anyone understood how much home meant to her, it was Rafael.

  “I’m gonna paint the greenhouse tomorrow,” he told her. “Now that you know about it, maybe you can go with me to Ludlow. You can help me pick out the color.”

  She could only nod as tears rolled down her cheeks.

  “When we’re in town, we can pick out seeds too. Uncle Reginald says he has special ones, from when Gabriel’s mother had the garden.”

  Kendra sensed the love already deep in the earth. Lady Kathryn’s legacy would be in every plant.

  “This is...perfect,” she said.

  Rafael took off his work gloves and grinned at her. In the morning light, his handsome face lit up and he looked happier than she had ever seen him. She knew he had to be hurting, but he looked healthy and strong. His aura was dazzling in the sun.

  Kendra walked toward him with one question on her mind. She didn’t want to ask him, but she had to know.

  “Does this mean that you’ve decided to stay?”

  Her voice sounded fractured and weak, but only because Rafael was the one boy who could crush her. She stood close enough to feel the heat off his skin and touched the infinity bracelet that he wore on his wrist—the one she had returned to him.

  “You left before. I know you did it because you missed Benny, but I...” She swallowed, hard. “I need you. You’re my home, my family. I want my future to be with you. You belong here with me...with us. I love you, Rafael.”

  “I love you too.” His low voice sent shivers over her skin.

  This time when he kissed her, she didn’t pull away. She knew exactly what she wanted. His body felt good next to hers and he kissed her with such tenderness that she sensed how special this moment was for him too. Rafael had loved her in his quiet way. He’d been her rock without expecting anything in return. Any future that she could ever hope for, it would begin with him.

  Kendra never believed that she deserved to be happy. She’d started a rebellion for the future of all Indigos. She still believed in her cause with all her heart, but now she wanted something for her. She did deserve happiness—and so did he.

  Only one thing stood in her way.

  She had to tell him what she’d done. Her secret. She still felt unworthy of being loved. If anyone understood that, it was Rafael. She’d sensed the way he felt when he’d let her past his mind defenses. But if she expected a life with him, she had to be honest. He had to know her sins. He’d been brave enough to show her every bad thing that had ever happened to him. Rafe had given her the courage to do the same.

  She reached for his hand and pulled him with her until they sat on a low stone wall that surrounded the garden. A large oak sheltered them from the morning breeze.

  “Te amo, mi corazón,” he whispered in Spanish as he kissed her cheek. The intimacy of his voice felt like making love.

  Kendra nuzzled her forehead against his as she struggled to find the words.

  “There’s something I have to...show you.”

  She told him what she wanted and he nodded without saying anything.

  Whenever she thought about the moment she would bare her soul and tell the guy she loved about what she did, she’d always envisioned it with her saying the words that would forever change the way he would look at her. But with Rafael, she wanted him to see it, to feel her shame.

  Kendra closed her eyes as Rafael held her in his arms. When she let him past her mind shield, the tears came. They would have no more secrets between them.

  She hoped he wouldn’t hate her.

  * * *

  Rafael held Kendra as if she would break. He breathed in the scent of her hair and kissed her neck. Being with her like this, he felt as if any minute he’d wake up from a dream and things would change back the way they were. He wasn’t sure he’d ever get over the feeling that he didn’t deserve her, but the one thing he could give her was a garden. He knew what it would mean to her—and to him.

  Kendra was an Indigo healer. Growing things would always be a part of her nature. It was the way she stayed connected to her Indigo soul and her gift. From the day he met her, she’d planted roots in him. She made him care about something more than the misery of his own life. She taught him how to love Benny. He hadn’t realized that until he’d lost little man, and the only anchor he had left was Kendra.

  It had been easy to steal Rayne’s Harley and run away from the pain. He didn’t give a shit about anything. Losing Benny had thrown him into that dark place, the hole his old man had dug for him the night he almost beat him to death. But after Rafe had been taken by the Believers, he thought he would die and not see Kendra again. That’s when he learned something different.

  Sticking around and caring what happens to other people—and loving someone—took real courage. That’s why he had to fix a garden for Kendra. He wanted her to know that he would stick now—no matter what happened—and he would love her, even if it meant she didn’t love him back.

  I have to show you something.

  When her voice whispered inside his head, he shut his eyes and pulled her to his chest.

  You don’t have to. Nothing will change how much I love you, he told her.

  Please... Do this for me. It was the last thing she told him before she touched his face and the darkness took over.

  Kendra didn’t block him with her shield. She unraveled a story she wanted him to see. His mind flashed on two girls arguing in a small bedroom. Two beds meant they shared the same room. It took him a moment to recognize Kendra as a little girl, no more than ten. She looked Benny’s age when he died.

  “Daddy said yo
u couldn’t go by yourself and I’m busy doin’ homework.”

  “But I don’t have milk for my cereal. I’m hungry.”

  “Eat it dry. I do.”

  Kendra turned up the music she’d been listening to on the radio and ignored her younger sister as she wrote in a notebook. After a while, she got up to see where the girl went. When she wasn’t in the kitchen, she searched the house and went to another bedroom. She pulled open a drawer and took out a box that had cash in it. Money must’ve been missing, because she looked mad. Kendra ran outside. When she spotted her sister down the street, she yelled at her.

  “I’m telling Daddy.” When the girl still didn’t come back, she shouted, “I’m not coming after you, Lily Grace. You’re a brat.”

  Kendra went into the house and slammed the door. She lost her temper and messed up her sister’s bed, but when Lily didn’t return after the sun went down, she got scared and didn’t know what to do. She went looking, but never found her, and the store clerk didn’t remember seeing her. When Kendra called her father, she had to leave a message. By the time he got home from work, it was too late.

  She’d be haunted by the sight of her sister walking away—and her doing nothing—but the accusations of her father hurt worst of all. He blew up and blamed her for everything.

  “I didn’t mean to do it, Daddy. It just...happened. Please don’t hate me.”

  After the vision ended, Rafael felt drained as if he’d lived it. Kendra stared at him and her eyes welled with tears.

  “She was only eight,” she said. “How could I do that? She was a little kid.”

  “So were you.”

  When she kept talking, he knew she hadn’t heard him.

  “Daddy worked two jobs so we could go to school and have a house to live in. He did that for us. All I had to do was watch her till he got home,” she cried. “The grocery store was only three blocks away. I should’ve taken her. I should’ve been a better sister.”