by Esme Devlin
“He married me,” I say with a shrug. I was about to look down at my ring finger but I took it off last night and forgot to put it back on.
“To stop the McGuiness boy from getting there first. Business. Whether or not he has a soft spot for you is irrelevant. If it didn’t suit our agenda, it wouldn’t have happened.”
I take a drink of my own coffee while we regard each other, and she lights up another cigarette. Alice sits beside me watching us.
The question is on the tip of my tongue. I assume the agenda is to destroy Liam’s father, but why are they going about it like this?
“Why are you all so invested in Liam’s father? I understand he did some terrible things to your family. Why didn’t Jim just — "
“Kill him?” Angela says, flicking her perfectly arched eyebrows and flashing me a smile.
I nod. I wasn’t going to say it like that, but since she chose to cut straight to the point, then so will I.
“Because it doesn’t suit our agenda.”
Swallowing, I look over at the ashtray she was staring at a moment ago. She’s weighing up my reaction, analyzing me, judging me.
“I want to help,” I tell her.
“You provide my son with a distraction, that’s help enough.”
“Now, now, Angela,” Alice cuts in. “Do you remember the story I told you and Kate on your wedding night?”
“I do,” she replies, flicking her ash on the side of the glass. “That was different.”
Alice shrugs. “You were just as callow back then as Lacey is now. We were three women with no choices, just as we are now.”
“We’ve not been three for a long time,” Angela says.
I assume Kate is Jim’s sister, but I don’t want to ask.
“Tell her,” Alice says.
Angela rolls her eyes and turns her head towards me. “Mythology. What do you know about it?”
I shake my head. “Nothing really.”
“Alice told us about the three Moirai. Daughters of Nyx — goddess of night — they are fate. One creates the thread of life, while the other measures how long it will be. The last one cuts it.” She pauses, making a snip with her two fingers. “Zeus, god of the universe tried to command them, and the three fates let him, safe in the knowledge that they’d spun his thread just as they had every other being’s, and that they could cut Zeus’s thread just as easily.”
“And how many did it take to spin, shape, and shear fate?” Alice says.
“Three,” she says, putting her cup down hard on the table.
“You’re religious?” I ask Alice. She seems like the one most open to letting me in.
I asked Shaun about this and he told me it wasn’t about religion. Alice said he didn’t lie.
“I like certain things from all religions, but there’s not one that’s convinced me it’s wholly correct,” she says, taking a sip of her coffee. “No, that there is just a story. But stories are how men have understood things bigger than them since the dawn of time.”
Just then, I hear a creak coming from the stairs and a few moments later, Shaun strolls into the kitchen, topless and wearing a pair of black shorts.
He takes us in, his gran, his mum, and now his wife, huddled together around three cups of coffee and an ashtray.
“Hungry, son?” Angela says.
“Aye. What are you all doing up so early?”
“Couldn’t sleep.”
Each of us say the words at the same time and he shakes his head while he walks to the fridge.
“What are you, in sync now?”
“I’ll get some porridge on,” Alice says as she gets up from her chair.
Shaun shushes her and shakes his head. “Sit yourself down, woman. I’m making sausages. Fucking starving.”
I wince at the sound of him swearing so easily in front of his mum and his gran. I look at Angela, waiting for her to reprimand him but she’s looking down at her nails whilst she taps them along the wooden table.
Her whole demeanor has changed. Where before she was flicking her eyebrows at me and acting like the queen of the kitchen, now she sits with her shoulders hunched and a vacant look on her face. She looks timid.
Just like she did yesterday.
And as soon as I notice it, I understand the meaning behind the story she just told me. Zeus commands them, but only because they let him.
We get to school early after a breakfast of sausages and beans, and I text Stevie to see how she’s feeling.
Since we tend to have lunch at the table with the boys now, I arrange to meet her at the usual spot at break time to tell her about what I found.
Not that I actually found anything.
But I do think I have a better understanding of what’s going on now.
“I think Angela and Alice have more power than they let on. Well, not power exactly, but whatever it is they’re just as involved as Shaun and Jim.”
“You know, that doesn’t surprise me,” she says.
“Really? I always thought Alice seemed nice. And Shaun’s mum, well I assumed being married to a man like Jim would…” I trail off because I’m not sure exactly what I’m getting at. I won’t admit it to Stevie but I’ll admit it to myself. I thought she was the type of woman well versed in using thick concealer to cover up the previous night.
I swallow at the thought of it.
“Well,” she says. “As for Angela, you’d have to be either strong or insane to survive a man like Jim Keagan all these years. And Alice, well that was her daughter wasn’t it? You don’t think she would want revenge for whatever happened? She schemed just as much as Shaun did at the start.”
“True.” I nod my head, turning towards her. “They kept referring to ‘their agenda’. At one point I thought Alice was going to let me in, but then Shaun walked in the room and that was the end of it.”
Stevie shrugs. “I wouldn’t trust whatever they’d have told you, anyway. They would just tell you what they want you know. No. I say we stick to the original plan and we do this ourselves.”
“Yeah me too, but we’re hardly making vast amounts of progress are we?”
“No,” she agrees. We both sit there on the wall, munching on protein bars and contemplating our next move.
I can’t snoop around in his house. There’s too many people, between his parents, his sister, his gran that seems to have a knack for being literally everywhere. He’s a light sleeper anyway and since he barely drinks I think last night was the best chance I’ll ever get.
Where else does he go though? His gym? Hardly the type of place you would keep secrets. His dad’s nightclub? Possibly. But how would we get in unnoticed?
“What about going to his warehouse?” I suggest.
“Why would we go to a warehouse?” She has a confused look on her face and I remember she was practically unconscious for most of that night.
“It wasn’t all like a warehouse,” I tell her. “There was a back room, done up really nice with doors leading off. Maybe it’s like… a base? Liam said they have meetings, maybe that’s the place?”
Stevie pauses for a minute, rolling her bottom lip between her fingers. “I mean it’s not a terrible idea.”
“It’s currently the only one we’ve got,” I tell her.
“We’d need to make sure they’re busy,” she says. “And do you even remember how to get there?”
“He’s taking my rings to the jewelers tonight to get them adjusted,” I say with a shrug. She knows what I’m saying. “I’ll have a look at a map on my phone and see if anything looks familiar.”
She nods. “Okay. I’ll text Calvin and see what he’s up to.”
Perfect.
Chapter 16
SHAUN
“Shaun, what can I do you for?”
I forget the guy’s name, even though he knows mine. He owns McLean’s, the only jewelry shop in town, and he made the rings I gave to Lace yesterday. Didn’t have her measurements when I got them commissioned but I thought I’d hav
e time to sort all that.
I should have known what ‘thought’ did.
“I need these a wee bit smaller,” I tell him, pulling the black velvet box out of my pocket and placing it down on the glass display cabinet. “They’re slipping off her finger.”
“Did you get her measurements?”
I scoff at him. “I’d have more luck getting blood out of a stone.”
He chuckles and picks up the box, giving the two rings inside a little shake. “She wasn’t as enamoured by this as you thought she’d be then? Should have told her how much… thought… you put into it.”
I shake my head. “Didn’t help the fact that my old man sprung it on her like a blowout on a motorway. She won’t do fuck-all unless she decides.”
He laughs. “Sounds a bit like my wee lassie.” Snapping the box shut, he puts it under the counter and emerges with a smile on his face. “I’ll take a smidge off them but if they’re still loose, I’m afraid you’ll have to drag her back here kicking and screaming.”
“With pleasure,” I tell him with a grin. “Right, I’ll catch you later. Thanks again.”
“I’ll have it ready tomorrow.”
I nod and make my way out of the shop. My dad wanted to see me and I have absolutely no doubts over what it’s about.
He’s never been one for waiting patiently.
Luckily for me I pre-empted this and have everything waiting. Gran was over at Lacey’s house this morning and I made sure she left the window unlocked, just like she used to. Laurence is home, but I’m betting on him being a heavy sleeper.
I need to take his laptop, deliver it to Doeboy’s dad, and have it back with him before he notices it’s missing.
Calvin’s on standby to help, so I drive over to his house to pick him up, and we head to my dad’s office together.
When we get there, I don’t knock. I feel like I’m over the stage of knocking now.
He’s alone, which is unusual. He sits back in his chair when he sees us, making a steeple with his hands and lets out a sigh. “Time’s up, son.”
“Aye.” I give him a nod. “Figured as much.”
“You’ve made arrangements?”
I sit my arse down on the chair across from him and start fiddling with his silver pen. “As much as I can. Do youse know what needs to be done when I hand the laptop over?”
“I’ve sorted it,” he says.
I drop the pen and sit back in my chair too, mimicking his stance perfectly. “I have a condition.”
His face breaks into an amused smile, and he sits forward, elbows on the desk now. “Fuck makes you think you can walk in here and demand conditions from me?”
“Lacey’s my wife. She’s family. I want her dad to suffer for what he did to her, but the charges won’t stick. I need your word on that.”
He narrows his eyes at me for a few long seconds and then relaxes back into his chair. “You’ve gone soft.”
“Thought I was always soft?” I snap back.
He shrugs. “I’ll see that it’s done.”
“Good. Are we done?”
“Aye, now fuck off.”
With pleasure.
Chapter 17
LACEY
Stevie looks up from her phone, flicking her eyebrows and showing her teeth through a grin. “He says he’s going to watch the football with Shaun.”
“Sounds promising?”
“I say tonight’s as good a night as any,” she says.
We’re both lying in her bed, a pizza box open in front of us and an old episode of friends on the TV.
“Did you have any luck with the map?”
“I think so. I’ve nailed it down to two possible locations. I’ll know it when I see it, for sure.”
She jumps up off the bed and goes to her wardrobe. “We should wear black.”
“We’re not fucking ninjas.”
She shrugs me off and flings both the doors open, retrieving a pair of my own black leggings and one of her hoodies. “Humour me.”
“If we get caught, it’s only going to make us look even more suspicious,” I warn her.
“If we’re wearing black, the chances of us getting caught reduces dramatically. Plus, what would we even say, anyway? There’s no logical reason for us to be snooping around Shaun’s warehouse.”
“True,” I admit, closing the pizza box and getting out of bed. “We could say we’re... I don’t know... planning a surprise party or something.”
“Oooooh yes like an engagement party,” she says as she whips her top up over her head. “Oh wait, we’re a bit late for that aren’t we?”
I laugh at her. “Less of your shit or I’ll tell them it’s for you and Calvin.” I shove the black clothes on anyway, since it makes her feel better.
“We won’t get caught, anyway. They’re watching the football. The game kicks off at 7.45... add in half-time and we’re good until at least 10pm,” she tells me. “Do you think balaclavas are too much? My brother has a couple, he used to ski with the school.”
“I think we’ll be fine. Maybe check if your dad has a torch, though?”
She nods and slips out of the room. Asking for a torch brought back the memories of that night, and the warehouse itself. That night, with the music, and the strobe-lights, and the people dancing, and Shaun... I wasn’t scared. There were no creepy vibes. But tonight, with the locked doors and the buzzing fluorescent strips and the peeling paint, when it’s just the two of us?
I swallow and scrape my hair back off my face, tying it tightly into a messy bun. I don’t want to be a fucking pussy anymore. I don’t want to be the girl who just lets things happen to her.
I want to be the girl who goes out and takes what she wants.
And I want to be the girl who has power over Shaun Keagan.
Not that I ever set out to do that. Hell, when I walked into this town I could never have imagined that I’d be his target, his victim, and ultimately his wife. I wanted to keep my head down and finish school and maybe start a life for myself. But this is the hand I’ve been dealt, and when the game changes, you have to change with it.
I guess it’s a bit like the football the boys are watching right now. Half-time comes, the players switch sides, and if you keep shooting for the same goal you had in the first half... well, you’re fucked, aren’t you?
Stevie comes back in the room with a big assed, bright yellow, industrial looking torch in her hand.
“Kinda defeats the purpose of us wearing black, don’t ya think?”
She smiles and flicks it on, shining it in my face. I throw my hands up to cover my eyes because I shit you not this thing is a torch on steroids. It’s like looking into the sun. She flicks it off again and I lower my hands, blinking a few times and wondering if I’ll actually be able to see again tonight.
“No one’s going to give a fuck about the hi-vis jacket when I shine this bad-boy in their eyes,” she says with a giggle.
“Yeah okay, point taken.”
We head to the car, me with my phone/ map and Stevie with her torch/ weapon. She drives, since she knows the roads better than I do, and I’ll be focused on trying to remember that night to the best of my ability.
“I think you want to head towards the B137 road,” I tell her.
“Rodger that.”
She fiddles with the radio and adjusts the volume so it’s not defeating levels.
“I wish I could remember what happened that night.”
I turn around to look at her. She looks like she’s concentrating hard but I very much doubt it’s on the road in front of her.
“I’d feel better if I knew, too,” I tell her. “Do you think it was...”
“Calvin?” she answers for me, and then shrugs. “Could have been. I’ve never asked him.”
“Why not?” I ask. It wasn’t accusatory, but I watch her body tense as she glances over to me.
“Have you ever spoken to Shaun about what he did to you? It’s not exactly something you just bring up over
dinner, is it?”
She has a point. “No. But I guess I felt like I got even for that. I had my victory when I watched the look on his face after I told him I was going to marry Liam. I crushed him as good as he crushed me.”
I turn and watch the fields on either side of us. We’re out of the town now, and on the twisty roads that lead to farms and places with names I can’t even pretend to pronounce.
“If you’re even, then what are we doing out here?” she says.
I shrug. “I don’t want to be even. I want to win.”
She glances over at me again and I glance over at her.
“You just need to be careful you don’t lose yourself in the process. You’re trying to do what no one else has done before. Not McGuiness, not the law, not anyone in this town. I said I’d have your back and I’m not going to bail on you, but I’d be lying if I said that A — I think this is going to work, and B — I think that even if by some miracle it does work, there won’t be any consequences.”
“There are already consequences,” I tell her. “I’ve already lost everything. My home, my freedom, my life. And I figure that maybe... just maybe we could make it work. Me and Shaun. MAYBE.” I turn my head and stress the words, in case she judges me. “But only if I stop letting him have all this power over me. Him and the rest of his family, too.”
She turns and smiles before looking back at the road, not saying a word. The sun is setting and everything, including her tan-from-the-bottle is cloaked in warm golden light. Even with all the shit that’s happened to me since I set foot in this town, I’d still do it again tomorrow. Without hesitation. Friends like Stevie come along rarely. A friend that has your back, no matter what. A friend that listens and doesn’t push, doesn’t pull, just gives their opinion and gets over it.
I dragged her into this mess the same way I dragged her to that party, but this time I’m not going in blind. This time will be different, I’m sure of it.
