Though Nyce is here, he no longer makes attempts to talk to me nor be in the same room with me which is fine. I don’t want him here anyway. We fall into this weird routine of avoiding each other, only speaking when necessary like at my doctors’ appointments or Lamaze class. We never arrive at the same time because we choose to drive in separate cars. Every now and then when we accidently happen to be in the same room together, I catch him staring at me, more out of concern due to the intense heartburn I’ve been having as I pop Tums like they’re candy.
I spend most of my days with Vic, helping him with his album that’s coming along nicely. I continue to shop online and fool around with Pinterest trying to get the babies room together. Other than that, it’s been a pretty chill, relaxing June.
I am out on the terrace that is attached to my bedroom. There is a cool summer breeze that is steadily blowing. I sit my journal down in my lap and sip on my lemonade watching the storm clouds move in. The wind picks up, whipping ferociously, ripping flowers, plants, and miscellaneous items out of the ground. I gather my things as lightning flashes illuminate the sky followed by roaring thunder and a downpour of rain. I run inside the house and run downstairs into the back to get Biggie out the yard. He comes running full speed inside, wringing out his fur, getting me all wet.
“BIGGIE,” I yell at him as he runs away from me scared when another loud thunder clap roars outside. “Punk ass dog,” I laugh. I yawn and stretch before checking my watch, seeing that it is after 8:30 at night.
“Wanna snack?” I ask the boys when they start to squirm around. I fix myself some crackers and cheese before heading back upstairs. Biggie comes running down the hall, almost knocking me over as we both enter my room.
“You’re not getting in my bed, Big,” I scold as he wags his tail looking up at me. I grab a towel to finish drying him off before making myself comfortable. The storm outside is monstrous. The emergency broadcast screen prompts on my TV alerting that there is a hurricane watch before my TV goes completely black. I pick up the remote pushing buttons, but nothing happens. The cable must have gone out. I peel off my tights, grab my book off the bookshelf and hop into bed.
My body is submerged into hot lava as the flames of hell engulfs me. I am burning; skin on fire as I desperately try to swim through the lava to get to safety. It’s so hot and I hear people screaming, trying to claw their way out in desperation. My skin burns, and I am afraid as tears stream from my eyes, but I continue to swim amongst the flames trying to find a way out. I can feel coolness, a hint of a cold chill indicating that I am almost there; almost at a place where my skin is no longer on fire and I will be at peace. Someone grabs a hold of my foot, stopping me from swimming to safety as a kick and flail my arms, trying desperately to get away. “Chill, you’re having a nightmare,” I hear a voice say as I continue to fight. “WAKE UP” the voice screams at me.
I pop my eyes open, sheets wrapped around me, body dripping in sweat. Nyce is looking down at me with an ice bucket and wet wash cloth in his hands. His shirt is off and he’s only wearing black boxer-briefs.
“What the fuck?” I ask sitting up in confusion. “Why is it so hot in here?” I whine as my tank top and hair sticks to my skin. I notice the many flaming candles that Nyce has lit around my room.
“The power went out. The only generators that are working are in the basement,” he replies, placing a cool washcloth on my head and putting an ice cube on my stomach. He smiles, watching the babies squirm around, looking like they are going to bust out of me like the scene from the movie Aliens.
“Come downstairs,” he says, holding out his hand and picking up the flashlight off my nightstand. I grab his hand as we walk downstairs into the basement. “I have to figure out how to get the generators to work in the rest of the house,” he states, plopping down on the floor as I stretch out on the couch. He hands me a spoon and one of the cartons of ice cream that is sitting on the table. “The fridge is out,” he shrugs, digging his spoon in. We sit silently in our underwear, eating ice cream in the dark room, the only light coming from the emergency light attached to the wall in the far corner.
“You okay?” Nyce asks, breaking the silence.
“I’m fine,” I reply, spooning mint chocolate chip ice cream into my mouth. “This is probably gonna give me gas,” I laugh.
“You be farting in your sleep,” he chuckles.
“And you snore,” I crack back.
“At least my booty don’t stink.”
“Says who? Your shits are thee foulest smells I’ve ever inhaled.”
“So,” he shrugs sitting up and farting in my face.
“You asshole,” I laugh, punching him in his back. “What the fuck?” I scream, sitting up when the smell of rotten eggs hit my nostrils.
“You act like you don’t be bombing the bathroom wit’ yo’ stinky booty ass. Your shits don’t smell like potpourri,” he mumbles, spooning ice cream into his mouth.
“I know. They smell like a bed of roses,” I laugh, lying back down as he sits in front of me eating his ice cream. I sneakily lick the side of his face before grabbing his head, sucking hard on his cheek.
“Stop girl. You play to fuckin’ much,” he laughs, pushing my head away as I clumsily fall onto the floor.
“HAHA,” I taunt when I make out the purple circle on his dark skin.
“You insubordinate and churlish,” he laughs, wiping my spit off his face while imitating the voice of the substitute teacher episode of Key and Peele. “Fuckin’ too old to be having hickey’s, yo. You ain’t have to put it on my face, creep.”
“That’s what your ass gets for farting in my face, punk.”
“Yeah…yeah…yeah…just finish eating your ice cream and shut the fuck up,” he jokes, handing me my spoon.
“Where’s Biggie?” I ask, getting comfortable on the floor, sitting next to him.
“The last time I seen him, he ran out of your room and was hiding under the dining room table.” He turns to look at me before his eyes focuses on my stomach.
“You big as shit, Ma,” he laughs.
“I know. I’m uncomfortable as fuck too,” I reply, digging my spoon into his salted caramel ice cream.
“Get out of here. You got your own,” he states, playfully elbowing me and turning his body so I can’t get none of his ice cream.
“Come on,” I whine. “The babies want some.”
“Let me touch yo’ belly and then I’ll give you some,” he says, holding the ice cream up high in the air.
“Fine,” I huff. He hands me the pint of ice cream, scoots in front of me and places his cold hands on my belly. I continue eating my ice cream as he smiles at the movements that the twins are making.
“We good?” He asks looking up, not taking his hands off my stomach.
“For now,” I shrug.
He pivots his body and sprawls out on the floor, lying his head on my thighs.
“It’s your dad little niggahs and we about to be pulling all the hoes,” he laughs, talking to my stomach.
“Nyce,” I call his name, making a stern face. He chuckles before closing his eyes.
“Nah. I’m just playing. I’m going to be here for y’all. Teach y’all how to be men; better men than I’ll ever be. I’m going to do right; teach you things and life lessons. You’ll never have to worry about that street life and if I ever catch one of y’all slippin’, I may be old, but I will still bust that ass. Try me. Be respectful to women because your dad…shit…I fucked up a lot,” he exhales. “But we ain’t gonna worry about these girls though, we got shit to do. Real men shit. Y’all are gonna go to school, get that degree, establish a career and then worry about the girl. The right one will come along when you least expect her to.”
“Excuse me,” I laugh when I pass gas.
“You’re fuckin’ triflin’, yo,” he snaps playfully, looking up at me. I shrug my shoulders and continue to eat my ice cream.
“Listen to your mom’s. She a little crazy but she m
eans well,” he smiles as I playful nudge his head. “Have each other’s back, always. If one ain’t eatin’, the other ain’t eatin’. Don’t let your brother fall and fail. It’s a lot of responsibility to be your brother’s keeper but y’all are me so I know what you’re capable of AND don’t be fightin’ over no fuckin’ pussy either. I will bust a cap in both of y’all asses if I ever catch wind.”
“Can you please talk to them like they’re babies?” I laugh.
“Sorry,” he smiles, popping his eyes open. The house comes back to life as the power cuts back on. Nyce pops up off the floor and helps me up.
“Thank you,” he says.
“For?” I ask.
“For allowing me to talk to my boys.”
“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “Please know that when they come, I will never use them against you,” I tell him softly, somewhat feeling ashamed of myself. He smiles and nods his head.
“Go on back to bed. I’ll clean up the ice cream,” he says, kissing me softly on my forehead. I turn from him and proceed to walk up the stairs.
“Damn, you gotta a fatty, girl.”
I giggle a little and use my right hand to shield my ass, while giving him the finger.
“Nyce,” I call his name, pausing on the stairs to look at him. “Thanks for coming to rescue me that night.”
He cocks his head and smiles.
“I always got you. I’m not always there when you call but I’m always on time,” he states with a smile before winking his eye and blowing me a kiss.
“You’re so damn corny,” I laugh and continue to walk up the stairs.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
I’ve been calling Dani for the past few days, but she hasn’t returned my calls. I’m starting to worry. It’s after midnight and I can’t sleep. I jump out of bed and start pacing the floor. Something in my soul is deeply disturbed by the fact I haven’t talked to her and per the tracking device, she hasn’t moved from this one location. I walk out of my room and knock on Nyce’s door.
“What’s up?” He greets.
“I need to find Dani. Will you help me?”
“No.”
“Well then, I am going to go by myself,” I lie. I’ve learned my lesson.
“Go where?”
“I don’t know. Go drive around.”
“I wasn’t playin’ when I told your ass that I will hold you prisoner in this house.”
“Then help me, Nyce,” I whine. He rolls his eyes.
“I’ll check it out,” he sighs.
“Good. I’m going with you.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Yes I am. You can’t stop me. We just have to track her with my phone,” I say showing him my phone. He takes the phone out of my hands and looks at the tracking.
“Go put some sneakers on,” he orders. I run into my room and as soon as I slide one shoe on, I hear Nyce walk out the front door.
“That son of a bitch took my phone,” I yell. I have no contacts or numbers stored in my memory. I run to the garage thinking that if I hurry up, I can catch up to him.
“That son of a bitch,” I yell out again when I notice that his ass has locked the key box with all the car keys locked inside. I start to pace the floor waiting anxiously for him to come back.
Two-and-a-half hours later, I hear a car pull into the driveway. I run to the window as Nyce is stepping out of his old black Maxima. I run down the stairs and open the door.
“Where is she? What happened?” I ask when he comes in without Dani. He doesn’t say anything. He just rushes past me and walks downstairs into the basement. I follow behind him and when I reach the bottom step, he is at the bar pouring himself a drink.
“Nyce, what happened to Dani?” I ask already starting to cry.
“Sit down,” he says in a breathless whisper.
“No. Tell me. What happened?”
“I found her but…there was nothing I could do,” he says walking towards me, handing me my cell phone.
“What do you mean?”
“She’s dead,” he answers nonchalantly.
“Did you kill her, Nyce?” I choke out, feeling like someone stole my breath as tears run down my face. He cocks his head to the side and stares at me.
“You killed her,” I cry.
“No. I didn’t kill her. She overdosed, Aneesah,” he says coming up to me and wrapping his arms around me. I cry into his chest as he holds and rocks me in his arms. I let go of him and look up into his face.
“Did you kill her?” I ask again looking into his eyes.
“No,” he answers softly with a straight face. I watch him closely as he stares down at me. He clinches his jaw.
“You’re lying,” I accuse tearfully.
“I’m not. I wouldn’t do that to you. Just listen…” he says with his arms stretched out.
“Stay away from me,” I snap, walking back up the stairs.
Once inside my bedroom, I call Dani’s father, Judge Rodriguez.
“Hello Aneesah. What did Dani do now?” He asks, yawning into the phone. My sniffling alarms him and before I can fix my mouth to say the words, he lets out a heavy breath.
“I hope that she is now at peace,” he says hanging up. I sit on the edge of my bed crying silently, trying to process everything. We have been through so much together. My mind is playing a ping pong game, bouncing back and forth between Dani and Yaya. Too much death is surrounding me, taking over my emotions. There is a tap on my door before Nyce walks in.
“Are you alright?” He asks, handing me a cup of tea. I slap his hands and watch some of the tea spill out onto the carpet.
“Get out, Nyce,” I exhale.
“Aneesah…I,”
“OUT,” I scream. He doesn’t budge. I roll my eyes and lie down on the bed, turning on my side facing away from him. He comes around to the other side and lies down beside me and stares. No words are spoken as tears continue to fall.
“I love you too much to hurt you like that,” he whispers, letting my tears fall into his hands as he gently strokes my cheek.
“I know you did it,” I whimper, turning my body away from him and facing the other direction. I can feel the warmth of his body pressing up against my back.
“I’m here if you want to talk,” he states while gently rubbing my back as I cry and hold on to my pillow.
I help Judge Rodriguez plan the funeral and help organize a big party celebration in Dani’s honor. It’s what she would have wanted. We comply with her wishes, asking everyone to wear yellow and white. The casket that I picked out for her, because Judge Rodriguez was unable to do it himself, is white and gold, fit for a princess. I bought her a beautiful canary gown and made sure that her makeup is flawless, hiding all the track marks she left on her skin.
On Tuesday morning as I ride in the limo with Pree, Jalena, Jada and Morgan, I look up at the clear blue skies, wondering if Dani has already made her peace with God and if He allowed her to enter his Kingdom.
Kiss my baby girl for me Dani, and hands off my man. Even in death, I ain’t playin’ that shit, I giggle in my head, thinking about the reunion that Dani, Saheed, and Angel are having.
We arrive at the church and take our seats in the third pew. The pastor leads us in prayer before the choir breaks out in song. People pay their respects and say a few words. When the pastor asks if there is anyone else who has something to say, I stand up and walk to the podium.
“Dani and I became friends in the most unconventional way. For those who truly know her, you know that she was the life of the party; the wild and crazy one,” I smile. “She had her flaws and she was aware of her shortcomings, but she said it best. If I am going to screw up my life, I am going to have a fun time doing it.
“I loved her, and she was one of my closest friends. She may have had an addiction, but she was still a beautiful person with a beautiful soul and I will miss her deeply.” I let out a deep breath, staring at my long-winded speech that I was prepared to make but not feeling it
in my heart. “Can I sing?” I ask, looking over at the pastor of the church. He nods his head and I step down from the podium and walk over to the piano. I make myself comfortable before starting to stroke the piano keys.
“Dani’s favorite movie is The Fast and the Furious,” I laugh as I start playing Wiz Khalifa’s “See you Again”, making it my own, turning it into a straight R&B song.
“It’s been a long day without you my friend…and I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again…,” I sing with tears falling down my face, falling down other people’s faces as some of the patrons in the congregation join in, singing the song with me.
When I’m done, I wipe my tears and grab ahold of Nyce’s waiting hand as he helps me back to my seat. The pastor preaches his sermon, followed by the burial and then back to Judge Rodriguez’s house for the backyard turn-up. Yeah, we’re partying for my girl. It’s what she wanted.
Jordana Isabel Rodriguez born October 29, 1988, died June 27, 2018 at the age of 29 due to an accidental overdose of prescription pills, cocaine, and heroin.
When I arrive home later that evening, I stop by Dani’s room and stand in the doorway. I am unable to bring myself to enter inside. I let out a breath, shutting her door before proceeding down the hall, into my room. Sitting on the edge of my bed, still wearing my yellow dress, I throw my head into my hands and cry. I couldn’t save her. God knows I tried but I couldn’t. Nyce walks in still dressed in his all white attire which compliments his beautiful chocolate skin. He wraps his arms around me, pulling me close.
“I couldn’t save her,” I tear up, laying my head on his shoulder. He reaches in his pocket and hands me a tissue.
“Thank you,” I whisper, slowly lifting my head. He looks into my eyes and takes his hand to wipe my tears. I am overwhelmed emotionally, and his touch is warm and inviting.
Unveiled Page 43
