by Sarah Morgan
‘Liv—’
‘Don’t say a word!’ Sniffing hard, she lifted a hand to stop him speaking. ‘It really isn’t your fault that I have fantasies and that I’m basically extremely stupid. You didn’t lead me on. You didn’t promise me anything. I imagined it all by myself with no help from you. I don’t know whether it’s the way I’m wired or whether it’s because I’m so sensitive about Max, but I just can’t seem to do casual relationships. You’ve been great to Max and without you he would have had a horrible, horrible Christmas and I’ll always be grateful to you for that. And now I need to…’ She backed away a few steps. ‘I need to walk by myself for a bit. Please, please don’t follow me.’ And without looking at him, she turned and walked up the snowy path as fast as she could without slipping and breaking her neck.
* * *
‘Mum, he’s been! The letter must have worked. He knew I was in Italy and he’s brought all my presents here.’ Dragging a long, colourful sock behind him Max came charging into her bedroom and Liv sat up and smiled. It was Christmas morning and she was gritty-eyed from lack of sleep and her head felt as though someone was attacking it from the inside with a pick axe.
‘That’s great, Max.’ She glanced towards the window. ‘What time is it? Max, it’s dark out there!’
‘No, it’s not. It’s snowed again but Stefano says it’s going to be a beautiful day and when we’ve opened our presents he’s taking us on a special sleigh ride. It has bells and everything. Are you coming, Mum? The twins and I are going to open our stockings in front of the fire. You don’t want to miss it.’ Jumping with excitement, he trailed the bulging stocking out of her bedroom and Liv slid out of bed and dressed slowly, knowing that she couldn’t avoid seeing Stefano.
When she’d eventually returned to the chalet from her walk on the previous day, there had been no sign of him and Isabella had told her that he’d gone skiing with his father for the day.
So Liv and Max had spent the day with Isabella and her two sons, and her husband had arrived from work in Milan and it had been fun. Together they’d prepared the elaborate Christmas Eve dinner and somehow she’d been so busy that she’d managed to bury her disappointment and her silly fantasies and enjoy herself. His family was warm and demonstrative and at least she hadn’t had to look Stefano in the face.
When he and his father had finally returned there had been so much activity and bustle in the chalet that there had been no awkward moments, no intimate opportunities for the two of them to be alone or for him to respond to what she’d said to him in that frozen, solitary moment when she’d bared her soul.
It would be the same today, she told herself as she pulled on the soft cashmere jumper he’d bought her only a few weeks earlier. It would be a busy family day with no opportunity for private moments and then tomorrow they’d be going home to England.
And then she’d rent a flat of her own, forget about Italian millionaires and try and get on with her life.
The next couple of hours passed in a blur of excited squeals, wrapping paper and laughter as everyone passed around presents and Isabella and Stefano’s grandmother served breakfast.
Stefano had given Max tickets to see a football match at the famous San Siro stadium in Milan and the little boy was speechless with excitement. ‘So we’re coming back to Italy? Wow, that is so cool.’
‘It’s certainly cool,’ Isabella agreed cheerfully. ‘Minus five today. Make sure you wrap up when you go out.’
Liv glanced at Stefano, grateful that he was obviously intending to carry on spending time with her son and seriously worried as to how she’d be able to maintain a simple friendship with him without making a fool of herself.
Liv handed Max her present to him and found herself with a lump in her throat as he ripped open the paper and found the football boots. ‘Oh, Mum…’ For a moment he couldn’t speak and then he looked at her, eyes shining. ‘You’re just the best and I love you.’ He flung his arms around her and Liv hugged him tightly, reminding herself of what was important in life. She had her lovely, wonderful son and Stefano clearly didn’t mean to stop seeing the boy just because they weren’t together any more and she was grateful for that. She was lucky. Really lucky.
Max sprinted back to the Christmas tree. ‘I’ve got presents for you and Stefano.’ He lifted up two haphazardly wrapped parcels and handed one to Stefano and one to Liv. ‘I made them.’
Liv glanced at Stefano, hoping that he wouldn’t wince when he saw his present.
He opened it carefully and pulled out a childish drawing of a car.
‘It’s your Ferrari. I went down to the garage and copied it. That nice security man helped me.’ Max watched him anxiously, gauging his reaction. ‘I’m not sure I got the nose right.’
Stefano was silent for a moment and then he cleared his throat. ‘The nose is perfect,’ he said huskily. ‘Thank you.’
The fact that he was so careful with Max’s feelings somehow made everything seem even worse and Liv dipped her head and concentrated on opening her own present. ‘Oh Max…’ She lifted the painted pasta necklace from the wrapping. ‘It’s beautiful.’ Slipping it over her head, she smiled at him and his eyes shone with pride.
‘Well, you’re a girl and Stefano says girls like jewellery and things. He gave you earrings and that thing for your hair, but he didn’t give you a necklace.’ Max slid his arms round her and Liv hugged him tightly.
‘I love it. It’s really beautiful.’ She watched with a lump in her throat while the twins ripped the paper off their presents and then Isabella tilted her head.
‘I hear bells outside—did anyone order a sleigh?’
Stefano rose to his feet. ‘We’ll see you later. Don’t eat lunch without us.’
‘Isn’t everyone coming?’ As Liv slipped her arms into her coat, she glanced around her but the group was already breaking up and doing different things. Donatella was going skiing with the other cousins, Isabella was joining her grandmother in the kitchen to prepare the meal.
Max was speechless with delight when he saw the horse-drawn sleigh waiting on the snowy path outside the chalet. ‘We’re going to ride in that?’
‘You certainly are.’ Stefano scooped him up and deposited him in the back of the sleigh on a deep pile of sheepskin rugs and soft cushions. Following more slowly, Liv climbed up beside him, horribly conscious that it was just the three of them.
She really didn’t want to be alone with Stefano. But what choice did she have? If she made an excuse, she’d spoil Max’s fun and she didn’t want to do that. So she said nothing and tried to look as though this was her idea of a perfect trip.
And in different circumstances it probably would have been.
The driver urged the horses forward and the sleigh moved smoothly along the snowy track that snaked up the mountain through tall pine trees. The only sounds were the muffled thud of horses’ hooves, the creak of the oiled leather harness and the tinkle of sleigh bells.
Just enjoy the moment, Liv told herself desperately, and then she glanced at Max’s face and felt herself soften with love. She would have been willing to face a thousand demons if it meant seeing her little boy smile the way he was smiling right now.
‘It’s magical,’ she murmured and Stefano spread a blanket over her knees.
‘Magical and freezing. Are you cold?’
‘No.’ How could she be cold when he was so close? Reminding herself not to get any ideas, Liv shrank back against the soft cushions and concentrated on the view.
The pain of not being with him would fade in time, wouldn’t it?
And if it didn’t, she’d somehow learn to live with it.
Max peered ahead of them, oblivious to the tension between the adults and fascinated by the horses. ‘Can they go faster? Can we gallop? Can I help to drive them?’
‘No, to all those questions,’ Stefano said dryly, his eyes amused as he watched the child. ‘We don’t want to end up at the bottom of the valley. I think, for now, we’ll leave
the driving to the expert.’
‘It was kind of you to do this for him.’ Liv risked a glance and then looked away quickly, appalled by the sudden stab of need that swamped her.
‘I didn’t do it for him.’ Stefano’s voice was soft. ‘I did it for myself. Because it’s the only way to escape from my enormous family. Families can give you many things, but not privacy and peace and quiet. I can’t quite believe that I’ve resorted to hiring a horse and sleigh, but that should give you some indication of how desperate I am.’
Desperate?
‘Don’t lean that far out, Max.’ Anxious about safety, Liv reached out a hand and pulled the child back and then glanced at Stefano. ‘Why do you need privacy?’
‘Because I refuse to propose to you with my entire family watching.’
There was a long silence and Liv sat absolutely still, unable to speak or move, sure that she’d misheard him. He couldn’t possibly have said what she thought he’d just said. She recited his words back to herself in her head. Then she turned her head slowly and their eyes met and held. ‘What did you say?’
‘What you thought I said. Marry me, Liv.’ The look in his eyes made her body tingle and warm.
‘Stefano—’
‘Te amo. I love you. I should have told you that days ago and I’m sorry I didn’t, but until yesterday I wasn’t sure you’d say yes.’
‘You should have asked me,’ Max chipped in breathlessly. ‘I could have told you she’d say yes. She’s always staring at you and looking goopy and she smiles all the time, especially when you’ve just said something to her.’
Liv blushed, amazed that Max had noticed so much.
Stefano laughed, but his eyes didn’t leave Liv’s face for a moment. ‘What is “goopy”? This is not a word I know.’
‘It’s sort of…’ Max pulled a face and shuddered as he tried to explain. ‘Girly. I had to marry one of the girls in my class in a play this term and it was the grossest thing that has ever happened to me. She looked as though she was going to eat me or something. And she said lots of mushy stuff. If Mum marries you do we get to live in your cool apartment and play with all the gadgets?’
A wry smile on his face, Stefano spoke to the driver in Italian and the sleigh immediately glided to a halt.
The horses snorted and tossed their heads, their breath clouding the freezing air, their hooves making a muffled sound as they stamped the snowy ground.
‘How would you like to exchange a few words with the horses, Max?’ Stefano lifted the little boy down from the sleigh and Max eagerly sprinted forward to stroke the horses.
Beneath them lay the valley. Smoke curled upwards from chimneys, snow sparkled in the bright sunshine and the mountains rose up with pride, dominating the breathtaking landscape with their stark, wild beauty. Breathing in the crisp cold air and the scent of pine trees, Liv knew that she’d never forget this moment as long as she lived. ‘You love me?’
‘I love you. Do you want me to say it again?’ Stefano took her face in his hands and looked at her, his dark eyes serious. ‘I love you, tesoro.’
Her heart was thumping and her mouth was dry. ‘But…’ She swallowed hard. ‘I’m no one.’
Stefano gave a slow smile that turned him from handsome to devastating. ‘You’re the woman I’m going to marry.’
She felt dizzy and shaky. Marry? ‘I thought—I thought that for you it was just sex,’ Liv whispered. ‘I wanted it to be more. I really, really wanted it to be more, but that was all in my own head.’
‘It wasn’t in your head.’ His eyes were gentle on hers. ‘It was real. And it wasn’t just sex.’
‘But…you didn’t say anything.’
‘Liv, you haven’t been with a man for four years.’ He spoke the words quietly, just for her. ‘I know what a big thing this is for you, even more so because you have always put your son’s needs before your own. To begin with you rejected everything I gave you. You were so independent. I was giving you time to get used to the idea of being with me. That’s why I wanted you to come home with me for Christmas.’
‘When you first invited me I was so excited. I thought it meant that you cared, but then Isabella told me that you wanted to keep Donatella at a distance—’
‘So it was Isabella.’ His eyes narrowed wrathfully. ‘Remind me to drop my sister in a snowdrift later. Liv, you’re an intelligent woman. Do I look as though I need help keeping women at a distance?’
Liv bit her lip, her eyes scanning every detail of his handsome face. ‘I suppose by now you must be pretty experienced at managing the expectations of the opposite sex.’
A smile touched the corners of his mouth. ‘I have had some practice, I admit. But this isn’t about me, is it, tesoro? It’s about you.’ His eyes held hers, demanding her full attention. ‘You still don’t believe that you are lovable and sexy. You are so lacking in confidence that when someone suggests I might have had an ulterior motive for bringing you here, you don’t even question it.’
Dragging her gaze from his, Liv realised that her heart was pounding. ‘Stefano—’
Strong fingers caught her chin and he forced her to look at him again. ‘I’m going to make you see yourself as others see you, Liv. Warm, beautiful, talented, clever and a wonderful mother. And sexy.’ He drew her head towards his and his eyes glittered dark with sexual promise. ‘Very, very sexy. I have never brought a woman here before. What does that say to you?’
Hypnotised, Liv stared up at him and he slowly brought his mouth down to hers.
‘It says that I’m crazy about you,’ he murmured against her lips. ‘It says that I cannot bear to be without you, even for a few days. That is why I brought you here, tesoro. And I wanted to see how you coped with my family.’ He pulled back slightly, a sardonic gleam in his eyes. ‘As you’ve already gathered, being with me comes with a great deal of family interference. Do you think you can stand it?’
Still in a state of suspended disbelief, Liv couldn’t think properly. ‘I—Does your father know that—? What if he doesn’t approve? I have a child, Stefano. Donatella would probably be a far more suitable Italian wife.’
‘Donatella and I would drive each other mad in less than a day. She isn’t the right woman for me.’ He sat back in his seat, his arm draped along the back of the carriage, very much his own man. ‘You, on the other hand, enchant me and fascinate me and have done since the first moment I saw you hugging Anna.’
‘That was so embarrassing—’
‘I heard her say that she wanted to buy you hot sex for Christmas and you looked so appalled that I was instantly intrigued. A woman like you should be having hot sex every night of her life.’
Liv blushed. ‘You were so kind to me. That night the car broke down and then with my flat—’
‘It wasn’t kindness, Liv.’ Stefano slid his arm round her and curved her against him. ‘I’ve never felt so protective towards a woman. I don’t know what happens to me when I’m with you but I just want to wrap you up and keep you safe.’
His words brought a lump to her throat. ‘Stefano—’
‘I make you this promise, tesoro,’ he said huskily, ‘I won’t let you be hurt ever again if it is in my power to prevent it. I won’t let you struggle and I won’t let you make any more sacrifices.’
His words drove the last of the breath from her quivering body. The emotions inside her swelled to a point that she could barely contain them. When had anyone ever taken care of her before? She’d always had to do it herself. On her own. She’d fought, struggled and worried her way through parenthood, with no one to share the burden. And now this man was telling her that she no longer had anything to worry about. She was afraid to move in case the dream shattered into a million tiny fragments.
‘I thought it was because you felt sorry for me.’
‘It was because I was falling in love with you. Almost from that first moment. You’re very easy to love.’
Tears pricked her eyes and her throat felt full. ‘This sort
of thing doesn’t happen to me.’
‘Yes, it does. It’s happening now.’ He was smiling and Liv shook her head, the tears blurring her vision.
‘No. It doesn’t—and I can’t…’ She brushed her hand across her face. ‘Any moment now you’re going to tell me this is a joke.’
‘Then perhaps this will convince you.’ Stefano reached into his pocket and pulled out a tiny silver box. ‘I went out yesterday and bought this for you.’
‘Yesterday? But you were skiing…’ Her voice cracked and she stared at the box, wondering whether it was real or whether her mind had conjured up this whole situation.
‘I was choosing a ring suitable for my future wife. I knew it had to be something extremely special because she is extremely special.’ Stefano flicked open the box and a huge diamond solitaire winked and flashed in the winter sunlight.
Liv gave a gasp of shock and then lifted her eyes to his. ‘It’s…a ring. You bought me a ring.’
‘You’re right.’ His eyes laughed into hers. ‘It’s a ring. It’s tradition for the man to give his woman a ring when he’s proposing.’
She could hardly breathe. ‘You want to marry me.’
‘That’s what I’ve been saying for the past five minutes.’ Stefano’s gaze flickered briefly to the front of the sleigh. ‘I hate to hurry this romantic moment, but Max is going to get bored with those horses shortly and then the goopy, mushy stuff is going to have to finish.’
‘Your father—’
‘My father loves you, but even if he didn’t it wouldn’t make a difference. He’s not the one marrying you. I am.’
‘You are?’ She looked at him, unable to believe that life could transform from misery to perfect pleasure in such a short time. ‘But yesterday, when I told you how I felt—’
