Stories on the Village
Page 12
In the first part of the story, in the very first paragraph, the Urdu version mentions ‘Mohan’ as the younger child who is found crying, as opposed to ‘Raja’ of the Hindi version. A couple of paragraphs later, in the Urdu version, Seth Ramnath is seen asking his son to buy a toy motorcar for himself along with his sister, while the Hindi version asks him to accompany his brother.
In the second part of the story, the Urdu version records the amount owed to Kuberchand as thirty thousand rupees, which is reduced to twenty-one thousand in the Hindi version.
A similar discrepancy in the figures is noticed in the third part when Susheela’s jewels are being valued by the Panch council. In the Urdu version, Durbaldas and Bheemchand bid for three thousand five hundred and three thousand rupees respectively, whereas in the Hindi version, it is three thousand and four thousand rupees respectively. The nature of transaction in both versions is also altered: whereas in the Urdu version, the person who quoted a higher amount is awarded the jewels, in the Hindi version, the person with the lower quote gets the jewels.
In the fifth part, a significant alteration in the narrative stands out. Landlord Jhabarmal accuses Susheela of not paying the rent on time: in the Urdu version he says, ‘. . . Had it been someone else (instead of me), you’d have quietly paid him the rent every month . . .’, while the Hindi version gives it a communal twist wherein he says, ‘. . . Had it been a Muslim . . .’ In the same part, a few extra lines are found in the Urdu version, to describe the old and decaying visage of Jhabarmal.
Another significant omission from the Urdu to the Hindi version is found in the sixth part of the story where Kuberchand refers to an upcoming expenditure of a thousand rupees for a sermon of the Bhagwat Katha—in order to deny the doctor’s fees of sixteen rupees for Susheela’s ailing son. The reference that heightens the hypocritical stance of the senior Panch is missing from the Hindi version.
In the eighth part, a minor alteration of a fifty-rupee note to a twenty-rupee note in the Urdu and Hindi versions respectively, changes the loss incurred by Jhabarmal when Revati tears the note into pieces while denying the alliance being offered.
The Urdu ending of the story carries the following additional lines:
The old woman said, ‘. . . These Panch be damned, they have finally snatched away my Darling’s life!’
Mohan replied with innocent simplicity, ‘Why did they wish to keep Jiya with them? And yes, why don’t they look after me? Why don’t they arrange for my education?’
The old woman embraced him and said lovingly, ‘You are the apple of my eye, beta.’
Holy Judges
First published in Urdu as ‘Panchayat’ in Zamana (May–June 1916) and later collected in Prem Pacheesi 1 (1920). Now available in Kulliyaat-e Premchand 10 (2001). It was published in Hindi with the title ‘Panch Parmeshwar’ in Saraswati (June 1916), and later collected in Hindi in Sapt Saroj (1917) and Mansarovar 7 (1947).
The Hindi version is longer by fifteen lines than the Urdu version. In ‘Panchayat’, Jumman Sheikh’s wife’s name is Fahmeen, but in ‘Panch Parmeshwar’ her name has been changed to Kariman. Gudhar Shah has been changed to Jhagru Shah. The names of the villagers—Ramdhan Mishra, Fateh Khan and Jaggu Singh in the Urdu story have been deleted except for the last name in the list in the Hindi version.
Atmaram
First published in Urdu with the title ‘Atmaram’ in Zamana (January 1920), and later collected in Prem Batteesi 2 (1920). Now available in Kulliyaat-e Premchand 10 (2001). It was published in Hindi with the same title in Aaj (May 1921), and later collected in Mansarovar 7 (1947).
The Urdu story is longer by two pages, but as the lines do not occur in one place but are interspersed in different paragraphs in the story, they cannot be extracted without creating confusion. The Urdu version fleshes out Mahadev’s character and his philosophical bent of mind in a more substantial way than the Hindi version.
It is only in the Urdu version, which is more expansive, that the reader gets to know that Mahadev and his sons fight over liquor. The Hindi version remains non- committal. There is only one line towards the end that says that Mahadev had quit drinking.
The conclusion in the Hindi version is far more ambivalent than in the Urdu version. The narrator in the Urdu version extols Mahadev’s transformation from an ordinary sinner to a divinely inspired man, whereas the Hindi version seems cynical about it.
Road to Salvation
First published in Hindi as ‘Mukti Marg’ in the monthly Vishal Bharat (April 1924), and later included in Mansarovar 3 (1938). In Urdu, it was included in Firdaus-e Khayaal (1929) as ‘Raah-e Najaat’. Now available in Kulliyaat-e Premchand 11 (2001).
Babaji’s Feast
Published first in Hindi as ‘Babaji ka Bhog’ in Prem Pratima (July 1927), and later included in Mansarovar 3 (1938). Not available in Urdu. Transliterated from Hindi to Urdu for Kulliyaat-e Premchand 12 (2003).
The Basis of Life
First published in Hindi as ‘Aadhar’ in the collection Prem Pramod (1926), and later included in Mansarovar 3 (1938). Not available in Urdu. Transliterated from Hindi to Urdu for Kulliyaat-e Premchand 12 (2003) with the same title.
Ramleela
First published in Hindi as ‘Ramleela’ in Madhuri (October 1926), and later included in Mansarovar 5 (1946). In Urdu, it is included in Prem Chaleesi (1930) with the same title. Now available in Kulliyaat-e Premchand 12 (2003).
THE BEGINNING
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This collection published 2018
Copyright © M. Asaduddin 2018
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ISBN: 978-0-670-09145-4
This digital edition published in 2018.
e-ISBN: 978-9-353-05190-7
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