by Piper Bee
I mean, it’s not a cabin. It’s a mini cedar mansion. Lena’s family must like double story windows, because the angular panes reach into the sky. So big, you can see right through the house to the backyard.
I grab my things from the car. Angela, Lena’s mom, directs everyone. She has a handle on life that I can’t comprehend. I don’t know how we’re made of the same chemicals. And there’s a reason Lena is gorgeous: because her mom is. Angela is the Greek side, with black hair in shiny, loose curls and the same bright green eyes as her daughter.
Lena bounds down from the front deck to greet me, her hair swinging behind her like Baywatch. “The boys are getting my room since it has two twin beds. The moms have the other two guest rooms, so you and I get to share the pullout in the basement. Promise it’s not drab at all.”
I laugh because I love it when Lena pretends to care about things like whether or not I care about a basement being drab. “Great,” I say. “Where’s…”
I hope I don’t seem eager as I look for him.
“Cale?” she finishes. I nod. Sure. I meant to say Cale.
Angela overhears and says, “Oh, he’s in the kitchen with Jin. Cutting watermelon, if you’re hungry.”
“I am so hungry, it’s not even funny,” I say to Angela, and she scrunches her nose at me in acknowledgement. Her attention goes right back to my mom’s probably invasive questions.
“Go ahead and find the boys. I gotta talk to my mom,” Lena says.
The boys. Of course she lumps all of the male species into one term.
I run inside because I really want to see… the fruit. Just the fruit.
The place is gorgeous. I feel like I’m constantly entering beautiful homes with arms full of my unworthy belongings. Yes, I did bring my trademark pillow and blanket.
This cabin is huge and airy, with exposed beams in the super high walls. That pleasant brown-red of cedar colors the inside, until the white and black fur floor coverings break the scene. The grey boulders of the fireplace climb one side of the living room.
“There she is!” Cale’s voice bounces against the walls and I look over to see his two lanky arms open in reception. One of his hands holds a watermelon triangle. I drop my stuff on the espresso leather couch. The contrast of it is ridiculous. Fashion Barbie, enjoying a luxurious leather couch. I mean, she’s a billionaire, so why not?
I smile at Cale but… I’m distracted by Jin putting force into the chef’s knife as he cuts the watermelon. I approach the kitchen island and he has the nerve to smile at me.
I pluck a triangle for myself and take a bite. It’s so perfectly sweet, firm, and overly juicy. At least food is also distracting.
Jin’s eyes flit up at me for a second. He makes another cut, smirking. “I see you brought your usual things.”
“Of course!” I say with a mouthful of watermelon. It’s already dripping down my fingers.
Cale snags a new piece. “Clearly, she’s not a shy one,” he says to Jin.
Jin laughs. “No. I knew that already.”
Oh, goodness. It seems I have a reputation among the boys.
The front door shuts and Lena walks in. She beckons me to leave my snack and check out the basement, so I grab my things and follow.
Down here is certainly darker, but the track lighting gives it a movie lounge vibe. There’s a huge black leather sectional that should really be two couches. Lena’s already pulled out the bed. The beams make it seem like the walls are higher than they are.
“Movie nights are so fun here!” says Lena. “Perfect for cuddling.”
“If it comes to cuddling,” I say. “I’m glacial, remember?”
“I wasn’t talking about you,” she says with a laugh. “But jeez, get a move on. You can’t even cuddle?”
“I can’t even flirt yet. I don’t know how I ended up in a relationship.”
Yikes. Lying still stings. I kind of don’t want to do it anymore.
“Lena, can we talk?” She gives me her attention. And I freak out internally. I can’t do it yet.
“It wasn’t too awkward when I left you at the movies with Cale, was it?” I say.
“No! We’re buddy-buddy now,” she smiles. “Actually, that’s how I set up your surprise.”
Yes. The surprise.
“Oh, really? Thank you! It’s a good surprise.” I hope I’m selling the I’m happy my boyfriend is here thing. I mean, I am happy to have Cale around, but Jin was the bigger prize.
Ugh, I wish I didn’t feel so guilty right now.
She flashes a smile. “I’m also super glad Jan-di convinced Jin to come. At first he said he didn’t want to ruin a girl’s trip, you know, when it was just you and me and all the moms. Guess he changed his mind.”
He did? Holy crap, he did?! Was that for me?
The hopeful part of me wants to think so. Because if he even has a sliver of the same feelings as me, I’d be over the moon. And really conflicted. Now I’m not sure which feeling is right.
But the fearful part—the greater part—watches Lena tap the spines DVD cases on the shelf. She’s in love with him. She picked her college so she could be near him. Even if Cale did get her to notice him, he’ll be at FredU with me. Honestly, we’d probably all be better off if Jin and Lena end up together. Cale would survive the rejection and so will I.
But that hopeful part of me is a lot bigger than it was yesterday.
♫
We spent the day swimming at the lake, and I can’t wait to spend long hours doing that all over again. I had a pineapple snow cone hand delivered to me by my brother. For a while, Lena and I just tanned and watched Jin and Cale race across the strip of sand, crash into the lake, swim to the buoys and back. I had my bets on Jin, but Lena bet on Cale and she was right. Jin lagged a tiny bit behind. It was wildly amusing. Among other things.
One perfect lake day down, four to go. I’m actually glad I cancelled my plans.
Lena walks up fresh from her shower, interrupting my reading. I’m not really paying attention to the magazine, though because I keep thinking about college. I don’t know why I’m starting to question my choices now. In my head, my major was always finance because it made good sense. But now I’m wondering if I should’ve explored other schools. I bring it up to Lena.
“God! We have at least a year before we have to figure out that crap, Joy.”
Lena stands over the bed, fluffing the down blankets and smoothing them so we can get to sleep. The basement carries more of Fernando’s taste than Angela’s. I think this is the only place he’s allowed to display Dallas Cowboys paraphernalia. I get up and drape the Cowboys throw over my arm, dark blue with a silver star. I wait for Lena to tidy our bed.
“And that plan is approved by your mom?” I ask.
She grabs the blanket from me. “I tell her Portuguese. But when she really interrogates me, I stick with political science.”
“Political science?”
“I mean, I’ll take a class to see if I like it. When Mr. Allen did Puerto Rican week in Lit, I started to really wonder about the politics of my heritage. So yeah, I’ll double major in poli-sci and dance.” Her laugh is like caramel, sweet and smooth and a little sultry. “You still majoring in finance?” she asks, using some awful form of a British accent conveying mockery and fanciness.
I throw a pillow at her. “At least I never argue with my mom about it.”
Lena finishes making the bed, then turns and drops backward onto it. “I wish I had your mom.”
My right brow goes up. “No. You really don’t. I wish I had your mom.”
“Oh my god, Joy. You have no idea how wrong you are. My mom has a deep, deep dark side.”
Lena always talks about it, but I sure haven’t seen the “dark side” of Angela Garcia. She’s treated me wonderfully. She’s a pillar of success in the community with her commercial real estate business. She even told me that I’m her favorite of Lena’s friends.
And seriously, as if Fernando Garcia, keeper of the
world’s best chocolate chip cookies, would stay married to someone with a “deep, deep dark side.”
I plop next to Lena on the just-made bed. “Can I ask you something?”
“Mmhmm.” I can tell she’s sleepy.
“When did you know you’d fallen for Jin?”
I feel kind of bad for gauging my own feelings against hers, but that’s why I’m asking.
Lena bolts up to sitting. “Don’t be so loud! Oh my God!” She rakes her hair with her fingers, laughing at the nerves.
And then she tells me the story.
It started with her getting her braces off in middle school. She was a kid when she got them on and a woman when they came off. The sudden sex appeal was brutal on her self-esteem, which surprises me. She got a lot of attention, good and bad.
“All fake,” she says. “I got asked out every day. It was like a game to them. No matter what I did, I lost.”
Oof. I’ve never related more to her.
Going into the summer before high school, Jin’s family decided to take Lena with them to Korea. Lena lights up when she talks about it. I can picture the scenes as she describes them: the top-notch, steaming Korean food, being bombarded by different customs, learning ritual phrases and making them laugh when she mispronounced things. I’m not jealous that she’s well-traveled, but going abroad with people who take care of you like family makes me wish I were her.
Her brightness fades. “Then came the first day of high school. It was a freaking horror show.”
She takes a deep breath, like I do when I’m steadying myself.
“What made it so bad?” I ask.
“I’m not stupid, you know?” She’s not really asking me. “I know what I look like. But the first day of classes, word spread that there was a new hot chick in school. People flooded the halls during first period just so they could get a look at me through that stupid slitty window in the door, like goddamn paparazzi. I thought it was gonna be eighth grade all over again. But, then I found Jin at lunch and sat with his friends to eat. He knew what was up, so he just told people to back off and they did because they respected him.” I don’t usually hear Lena’s voice so low or genuine like this. “There’s no other guy out there I respect as much as Jin. I don’t really know when it happened, but... I realized that I can’t lose him.”
Wow, that makes me feel selfish. Here I am with a schoolgirl crush like all those other girls Lena mentioned and here she is way beyond just loving Jin Park. He changed the whole game for her.
I fixate on one corner in the ceiling, where the crown moulding doesn’t quite meet. Is Jin worried what Lena will think of his opportunity in Korea?
I wonder if she’s the reason he’s struggling to decide.
“Anyway,” she says, yawning. “I’m wiped out.”
“Me too,” I say, though it’s not really true. But it doesn’t matter what I say. The dark lashes of her eyes are already closed even though the lights are still on.
It doesn’t matter if I’m a bad liar or a good one. I doubt I’ll ever have a chance with Jin.
TRACK 15 - FOREVER YOUNG
JULY 18TH
There’s something so wonderful about the way summer leaves a layer of different things on your skin. Smoke from a bonfire, sweat and tan from direct sun, the musty smell of lake water in your hair.
And if we’re talking about me, the dried watermelon juice on my arms.
For hours, Cale and I have been swimming in the lake like we’re a pair of preteens. With adult-sized cannonballs. I beat him breath-holding, he’s clearly a faster swimmer, I’m better at Marco Polo, and we’re about matched in splash wars.
He’s definitely got me beat in the bright smile department, though.
I’m not sure if you can call the sand patch a beach, but it’s packed with swimmers and tanners. The docks, too. I’m out by the boundary of buoys around the swimming area. I can see out into the grander portion of Victoria Lake, where people fish and zip around on jet skis or sit in swan-shaped pedal boats. I definitely want to learn to water ski someday.
Bobbing in the cool lakewater, I glance over to land and witness squealing little kids in adorable baby rashguards, ketchup-covered hot dogs in their pudgy hands. Lunch sounds like a good idea.
Especially once I spot my brother walking to the snow cone stand to start his shift.
“I’m heading landward,” I tell Cale, and paddle myself in that direction.
“Understood, Almond Joy! I’m gonna float on for a bit.” Sure enough, he splays himself out and relaxes on the water surface.
I make eye contact with my brother and he smiles at me from beyond the dude so clearly flirting with him. Even if he was a jerk for upending my plans, I can’t stay mad at him. I still see the kid who grew up with me. The one who smashed ice cream in my face as often as he willingly shared a single cone. He adjusts his hat and does “the nod.”
It’s our thing. At baseball games, he finds me and nods from the pitcher’s mound.
I nod back. I always will.
Water from the swim drips down the length of my body, tickling my legs. I slick back my dirty blond hair and run toward our group’s spot. The sand sticks to my feet, then the hot concrete path pricks them, and then my soles are caressed by supple green grass. I don’t blame the moms for not swimming among overeager kids.
Jin claims he forgot his bathing suit, but I overheard Jan-di say she wanted to spend time with him because “she never see him when he at school.” It seems like he’s engaging the moms pretty well.
Lena clearly prefers sunbathing to swimming. Might more accurately be called “summertime man-catching.” But, even with her bright pink bikini that hugs her youthful Latina curves, she straight up ignores how “nice” the men are toward her today. The guy she fell for is probably the least superficial guy in her life, maybe apart from Cale.
But even he makes elaborate plans to get her attention, I guess.
I yank the blue striped towel from the ground and use it to dry my face and scrunch excess water out of my hair.
A toddler in a forest green swim diaper waddles up and touches my leg. He has adorable round eyes with impossibly long eyelashes, big rosy cheeks, and brown curly hair that reminds me of Carson.
“Hawoh!” he says, looking up at me with a toothy smile. What did I do to deserve such a cute smile? Seriously, I’ve been getting way more than my fair share lately.
Jin kneels down to him and holds up his hand for a high-five. “Hey, little guy,” he says, and the boy slaps his hand.
Awwwww! I feel like Kristen Bell seeing a cuddly little sloth.
“Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry!” says the mom. She’s a petite woman with long wavy hair, who snatches the boy up with a confident grasp that only moms seem to have.
“It’s okay!” I tell her. I kind of love when kids break social boundaries like that.
Jin stands up and says with utmost charm, “I hope my future kids are as cute as yours.”
“Ha, thank you,” she says graciously, and I know she blushes because, like, how could you not?! I’m blushing behind my towel and it’s not even my kid!
So Jin Park wants kids someday. Noted. Man, I didn’t think that sort of thing got to me.
“Your boyfriend is really nice, Joy,” says Angela, and I revert back to reality. She’s stretched out in a lounge chair with her wide-brim hat, flipping through a home decor magazine.
“Where did you meet him?” she asks.
“Glee club,” I answer. Jin takes a breath to say something, but Angela commands the verbal baton.
“Your bathing suit is so cute,” she says, like my answer didn’t even register.
“Really? Thanks.” Her comment surprises me. It’s just a plain and modest navy one-piece with a sweetheart neckline. I mean, it’s fine. Lena’s is way more glamorous.
“You should dress more like her, Lena,” says Angela, not skipping a beat.
“Mom!” Lena says, like a bite. She turns her head the other w
ay, having none of it.
“You dress too sexy. Guys minds go crazy—”
“Mom!”
Angela doesn’t stop for even half a second. “Jin knows! Tell her.”
My mouth drops open, but I close it right back up. Jin cocks his head and I notice he’s stopped breathing. He lets out air with a small laugh.
He doesn’t dare remain unresponsive. “I don’t think it should matter what girls wear. Guys will always think things.” Safe answer. I’d verbally agree with him if it wouldn’t offend the Garcia matriarch.
“What do you prefer, though?” she asks him, pulling her sunglasses down to peek at his face.
His brow lifts. “Mrs. Garcia, I don’t think—”
“Oh come on, Jin. You’re like my own kid. Like a brother to Lena. Your opinion matters to us. Come on.”
There’s the dark side.
Lena is stoic, with arms folded and glare in the opposite direction. No matter what he says, Jin is doomed at this point, I think.
“I prefer a girl who’s confident, no matter what she wears,” he answers.
This guy. Pulling a rescue move on a collision course. I hinder a smile and wipe my neck of the sweat beads I earned during this conversation.
Angela pulls her sunglasses back into place. “Well, I don’t know who raised you, but she did a pretty good job.”
Lena uncrosses her arms mouths “thank you” to Jin.
So maybe it wasn’t “deep, deep dark” like Lena had described, but I see now why Angela Garcia is not to be messed with. Unless, of course, you’re the irresistibly benevolent Jin Park.
♫
I slam cards on the glass coffee table. “Told you not to mess with me, Thomas!”
“Again!?” Cale groans.
“Tired of being slaughtered at this game?” I taunt.
Jin laughs, still shuffling the cards in his hand as if I didn’t just beat him, too. Three times in a row.
