Breaking Shaun

by E. M. Abel

  I decided to take a shower and start getting ready for work, leaving Natalie to sleep in my bed.

  When I walked out of my bathroom, wrapped in a towel, I found Natalie cooking breakfast in my kitchen. I stopped in my tracks and felt a big smile form on my lips.

  “That’s got to be the first time anyone has ever cooked in my kitchen,” I told her as I made my way toward the stove to see what she was making.

  “Yeah, I can tell. You have, like, two pots and no cooking utensils. I had to use this fork to flip the pancakes.”

  “You made pancakes? How in the hell did you find stuff for pancakes?”

  Natalie laughed. “I have my ways. They’re banana pancakes. I used all your bananas by the way.”

  I took a big whiff, and it all smelled delicious. My stomach growled, and my mouth started watering.

  “I can’t believe you cook. Just when I thought you couldn’t get any better,” I said before smacking her on the ass.

  “Aw, you’re so sweet,” she responded sarcastically as she scrambled eggs in one of my pans.

  “Well, you know, I try,” I said, smirking at her. I picked up a pancake and took a bite. I groaned as I chewed it.

  “Jesus, Shaun. When’s the last time you’ve had a home-cooked meal?”

  I shrugged as I swallowed and took another bite.

  Natalie shook her head and laughed to herself as she finished cooking the eggs.

  I never saw this coming. Yes, she was sexy, she was smart, and she was amazing in the sack, but never in a million years did I anticipate her being a good cook, too.

  I was seriously fucked.

  Shaun took me home after devouring the breakfast I’d prepared. He’d eaten like he hadn’t had food in days. He’d told me he would be working on my car soon, and he’d asked again if I wanted him to help me restore it. It just seemed like such a big commitment to make—not only financially, but emotionally, too. Asking Shaun to restore my car would also mean relying on him for more than just sex, and I knew that wasn’t a good idea. I was already getting in too deep as it was. But the thought of finally making that dream a reality was too good to pass up, so I’d agreed to let him start once I moved into my own place. Right now, that was my priority.

  When I walked into Nick’s apartment that morning, I was surprised to see him there. “Hey! What are you doing here?”

  Nick was sitting on his couch, watching TV, with his feet propped up on his ottoman. “Well, I was trying to surprise you by taking a day off, but then I realized you never came home last night.” He narrowed his eyes at me.

  “Aw, Nick, that’s so sweet. I’m sorry I wasn’t here, but I am now! We can still spend the day together.”

  I started making my way back to my room, and Nick got up to follow me.

  “You seem awfully chipper,” he said as he leaned in my bedroom doorway.

  “Do I?” I started going through my drawers for clothes.

  “Yeah, you do. Were you with Shaun again?”

  I straightened my back once I’d found the shorts I wanted and replied, “Yeah. Why?”

  He shrugged. “Just wondering.”

  I started searching my closet for a shirt when Nick moved to sit on my bed.

  He asked, “So, what have you been up to?”

  “Nothing much. Shaun said my car should be ready by next week, so at least I’ll be able to drive again soon.”

  “Oh, yeah?”

  I turned around with a shirt in my hands and held it up to my chest, so Nick could give me his opinion. He nodded his approval, and I tossed it onto my bed next to my shorts.

  “Yeah. He wants to help me restore it, but I told him I’d have to wait until I got my own place first.”

  Nick looked surprised. “You’re trying to leave me already?”

  “No, but I’m sure you’re ready to have your apartment to yourself again.”

  “I dunno. Having you around has been nice even though I really only see you on the weekends.”

  I sat down on the bed next to Nick, and he put his arm around my shoulders.

  “I know. Our schedules suck. What are you doing this weekend?”

  “Hanging out with my amazingly sexy boyfriend and my fan-fucking-tastic cousin, that’s what.”

  I laughed as Nick squeezed my shoulders.

  He leaned in close to my ear. “So, how are things? With Shaun, I mean.”

  I raised my eyes to look at him, and I could feel my cheeks growing warm. “Good.”

  “Good?”

  “Really good actually. You were right. It’s so nice to be with someone, knowing we’re both on the same page. I don’t have to make excuses or play games. I can just relax and have a good time, you know?”

  Nick smiled. “I do know one thing. You look happier now than I think I’ve ever seen you. And if he’s got anything to do with that, then I say keep doing what you’re doing,” he said, wiggling his eyebrows.

  I laughed and started to stand when I remembered something. “Did you know Shaun teaches surf lessons to little kids?”

  Nick’s head jerked back, and his eyebrows furrowed. “He does?”

  “I know. I was surprised, too.”

  “Wow. Who knew Shaun has a soft side?”

  I spent the rest of the week working and hanging out with Nick and Luke. On the weekends, Luke would spend most of his time at Nick’s apartment, and the more I got to know him, the more I liked him. Their differences were what made them so perfect for each other. It was nice to see my cousin so happy and in love. I just hoped it would last. I knew Nick had just as many doubts about love as I did, but he was willing to try, and I envied that about him. I wished I had that kind of courage.

  By the time Sunday evening came, I was incredibly horny, but I refused to call Shaun. There was no way I was going to let him know just how much our time apart affected me. I’d even considered calling Brad, but I knew it would be pointless. He couldn’t satisfy me the way Shaun could. It drove me crazy how much power Shaun had over me already.

  When I walked into Red at six, I was surprised to see Jay standing at the bar, talking to Trey and Mandy. I hadn’t seen him since the day he hired me. Mandy had said he rarely made appearances. Besides the quarterly staff meetings, his employees would hardly see him. I kept my eyes on him as I wrapped my apron strings around my waist and tied them. He was dressed in a perfectly tailored gray suit, and a light stubble was growing on his jaw.

  Jay turned to look at me as I approached, and I gave him a small smile.

  “Hi, boss man.”

  His eyes swept over me. “Natalie,” he greeted before turning to face Mandy again.

  “I was just telling Mandy and Trey that a few things are going to change around here.”

  I came to stand next to Mandy, and I tried to read her expression to figure out what was going on. She was blushing a little with a coy smile on her face. Trey was smiling, too, and I was curious to hear what was happening.

  Jay looked at me again, and he grinned. “I’m moving the three of you to VIP.”

  My eyes widened, and my jaw dropped. I turned to look at Mandy, and before I could respond, she gave me a big hug as she squealed in my ear.

  “VIP, baby!” Trey shouted.

  Jay chuckled as he pushed himself away from the bar. “Well, you guys better head upstairs and get settled. I have some important guests coming in tonight, so don’t make me regret my decision.”

  Mandy let me go and turned to face Jay again. “Oh my God, thank you!”

  “We won’t let you down,” I told him.

  He started walking toward the back entrance. “I’m sure you won’t,” he said before disappearing down the hall.

  “Do you realize what this means?” Mandy asked me as we started walking toward the stairs leading to the VIP area.

  “What?”

  “We’re about to start making at least triple what we were. This is huge!”

  “I wonder what happened to Jess, Sasha, and Kurt,” Trey mutt
ered from behind us as we climbed the stairs.

  They were the bartenders who used to work in VIP.

  “I saw Faith taking them to her office when I first came in. Whatever it is, it can’t be good. They either got the boot, or they’re moving down to take our places,” Mandy said.

  I shrugged. I didn’t really know any of them, so it didn’t matter much to me. “Either way, it works out nicely for us.”

  It was Sunday night, and my dad and I were cleaning up in his kitchen. We’d just finished fixing Natalie’s car, and it was running again.

  “So, this Natalie girl seems nice,” he said as he dried his hands off with a paper towel.

  I ripped one off of the roll and leaned back against the counter as I wiped my hands. “Yeah, she’s nice.”

  “You must like her if you offered to fix her car for free.”

  “Yeah, I like her—in my bed,” I said, giving him a defiant look.

  I knew what he was hinting at.

  My dad shook his head and tossed his paper towel in the trash. “Does she know that’s all you’re interested in?”

  “Yes, Dad. I know you think I’m a total douche bag, but even I have morals.”

  My dad raised his eyebrow and looked at me. He rested his hip against the sink and crossed his arms. “I think you’re a douche bag?”

  I shrugged.

  “I don’t think you’re a douche bag, son. I just think you’re a little lost.”

  I held out my hands. “I’m not lost. I’m right fucking here.”

  He gave me a warning look before explaining, “You are lost. You think avoiding anything that requires you to feel makes you stronger. You think protecting yourself with a smart-ass mouth and an I-don’t-give-a-fuck attitude makes you smarter than the rest of us, but it couldn’t be further from the truth. You’re scared, and you’re hiding behind your fear. You’re being a coward.”

  I clenched my jaw, and I could feel my heart racing in my chest. Of all people, my father is lecturing me about love?

  “Is that right?” I asked, moving to cross my arms over my chest. “And what would you suggest I do? Fall madly in love and have my heart broken, so I can spend the rest of my life being fucking miserable and taking it out on everyone around me?”

  My dad’s head jerked back. “Is that how you see me?”

  “That’s not how I see you. That’s how it was. You think I didn’t see what mom’s death did to you? You think because I was just a kid that I don’t remember what it was like to watch my father break right in front of my eyes? How are you, of all people, going to lecture me about love?”

  My dad pushed himself away from the sink and took a step toward me. His finger pointed at my chest, and I could see the emotion in his eyes.

  He said, “Loving your mother is the best goddamn thing I ever did with my life.”

  He put his hand down and turned to take a few steps away from me as he calmed down. When he turned back around, he met my gaze and continued, “You think you would even fucking be here if I hadn’t? I’d go through that pain every time if it meant having those years with her again. Shit happens, Shaun. That doesn’t mean you run and fucking hide every time things get scary, every time you start to feel something. That’s why you’re lost, son, because you think a life without love is better than a life with it, and you couldn’t be more wrong.”

  I couldn’t sleep that night. I kept replaying the conversation I’d had with my dad in my mind. He had been right. I was fucking scared. I just didn’t see the point in getting into a situation that I knew would fall apart. I wasn’t the relationship type. If I saw something or someone I wanted, I would get it. Relationships were too much work. Even if I did decide to get involved with someone, what would I have to offer? Besides being proficient in giving orgasms, I wasn’t really useful for much else. I wasn’t rich, and I sure as fuck wasn’t accustomed to dealing with a woman’s needs, aside from the physical. I knew if I ever did fall in love, it wouldn’t come easily, and I wasn’t sure that was a challenge I would be ready for.

  Of course, I also thought of Natalie. I wondered what she would think about what my dad had said, and I was also curious what made her avoid love the same way I did. Maybe we were both cowards hiding from the one thing we couldn’t control. I was starting to believe that fear was exactly what had brought us together in the first place.

  Monday morning, I woke up to Nick knocking on my bedroom door. I’d had a busy night at work, and I wasn’t ready to wake up yet.

  “What?” I moaned as I rolled over and checked my clock.

  It was eight thirty.

  Nick pushed open my door and walked in with a smile playing on his lips. “Someone’s here to see you,” he told me.

  I sat up in my bed. “What?” I asked again as I pushed my hair out of my eyes.

  “You have a guest. I suggest you get your grumpy ass out of bed and run a brush through your hair before you come out,” he said before leaving me alone.

  I looked around my room and gave my brain time to wake up before swinging my legs over the side of the bed. I couldn’t think of anyone who would come for me at Nick’s apartment this early in the morning. Besides dropping me off, Shaun had never been to Nick’s apartment, so I doubted it could be him.

  After checking myself in the mirror and making myself as presentable as I could, I made my way out of my room and walked toward the kitchen. I stopped when I saw Nick, Luke, and Shaun sitting in the breakfast nook. They grew quiet as all of their eyes came to me.

  “Oh, hey,” I said as I continued my path toward the kitchen.

  Shaun smiled at me before his eyes moved down my body. I was dressed in a pair of small shorts and a tank top, leaving very little to the imagination.

  “Ahem. Well, we’d better get to work,” Nick said, giving Luke a look.

  Luke smiled at him before standing up. “Yeah. We don’t want to be late.”

  I rolled my eyes at their obvious plot to leave Shaun and me alone, and I made my way to the coffee maker.

  I held the pot up and looked over my shoulder at Shaun. “You want some?”

  He shook his head. “No, I’m good.”

  Nick and Luke said good-bye from the door before walking out and leaving us.

  “So, what brings you out here so early?” I took the seat across from him.

  “I finished working on your car yesterday. Figured you might want it.”

  My eyes widened as I took a sip from my mug. “Wow. Already? That was fast.”

  He shrugged. “So, you working today?”

  I shook my head. “Nope. Mondays and Tuesdays are now officially my days off.”

  “Good.”

  I paused as I brought my cup to my lips again. “Why? Did you want to do something?”

  Shaun stood up and gently took the coffee mug from my hand before placing it back on the table. “As a matter of fact, I do.”

  “Goddamn, I love your ass,” Shaun whispered into my ear as he squeezed it in his big hands.

  We were both naked in my room. My chest was pressed against my closet door, and Shaun was standing behind me. He had already eaten me out on the kitchen table, and my legs were still shaky from the orgasm he’d given me. I moaned and pressed myself closer to him.

  “You like it when I play with your ass?”

  I didn’t respond. I just stood there, panting, with my cheek against the wall.

  Shaun smacked my ass, and I sucked in a breath when I felt the sting.

  “You like it, don’t you?” he asked again.

  “Yes,” I breathed.

  “You want my dick in here?” he asked as he spread my ass and let his finger tease my opening.

  I gasped and nodded. Shaun moved one of his hands and slipped one of his fingers inside my pussy, getting it wet and making me shudder in pleasure. When he pulled it out, he let it slide around to my ass where he teased my opening with the tip. I squeezed my legs together to help stimulate my swollen, sensitive skin, and Shaun slowl
y pressed the tip inside, my juices on his finger providing the lubrication.

  “Fuck, you’re so tight,” he whispered against my ear.

  I started breathing harder as he pushed his finger in farther, and his other hand went to play with my clit. He pulled his finger out of my ass and told me to turn around.

  With my back on the wall, Shaun pulled one of my legs up, and he slid his sheathed dick into my pussy. I moaned as he filled me, and he lifted my other leg so that they were both wrapped around him. Shaun’s hands moved back to my ass as he leaned forward and kissed me. His tongue invaded my mouth as he fucked me against the wall.

  Then, he slipped that same finger back into my ass as he continued fucking and kissing me. I gasped against his lips as I felt another orgasm coming. His finger started a slow rhythm to match the one of his hips, and I thought I was going to lose my mind. So many sensations were coming in at once. It didn’t take long at all before I was coming, and surprisingly, Shaun wasn’t far behind. He moved his hands from my ass and held my hips as he began thrusting harder. His kiss grew more urgent, and I kissed him back, still coming down from my orgasm. When I felt his muscles tighten, he groaned into my mouth. Shaun’s body shuddered as he pounded himself inside me over and over.

  “Goddamn it, Natalie. Fuck, you feel so fucking good,” he growled on his final thrust.

  I could feel his dick pulsing inside me, and my insides automatically tightened around him, causing him to shudder again.

  “Ah, God, I love feeling you come,” I whispered as I let my head fall back against the door behind me.

  Shaun’s chest was pressed tightly to mine, and I could feel the beat of his heart as it raced. His face was in the crook of my neck, his warm breath washing over my skin. He was silent as he fought to catch his breath. After a minute or so, he finally pulled out and released my legs, letting my feet touch the ground again.