The Hand That Holds Me ((The Forever Mine Series) Book 1)

by H. J. Marshall

  I asked Lucas about whose idea it was to start Family Time and he dodged the question with a vague response of some board member suggested it a few years back and it was a success so they kept it in place. I didn’t push on the who because, truth be known, I was not excited to meet the Board of Directors quite yet.

  I had an internship my last year of college that had me interacting with their BOD and I was not impressed with them in the least. A group of individuals who wrote checks or shuffled paperwork, patting each other on the back for a job well done, while the people who did the work got no recognition and more demands heaped on them. That was a major part of my decision to wait for a career instead of settling on a job.

  I think MSJ Media was worth the wait.

  We arrived at my apartment over an hour later due to the horrible traffic Atlanta has. Once inside, he called for take-out from my favorite Mexican restaurant, we changed into our comfy clothes and picked out a movie.

  We had been doing this for the last few days. Getting comfortable and cuddling on the couch. We hadn’t had a repeat of the make out incident from last week and my raging libido was starting to make me edgy. I was starting to think that waiting may have been a bad idea. This is the longest I have ever been with a man without sex. I’m happy we have taken the time to get to know each other on a personal level but it was now past time to get to know each other in the physical level.

  We tucked into our food and were enjoying the rom-com we were watching. It was my turn to pick a movie so I made him suffer through The Proposal. I loved Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds. Add Betty White and it was the perfect romantic comedy.

  When the credits rolled, he got up and turned the TV off, effectively blanketing us in silence. The look on his face as he stalked across the living room was one of determination and fierce hunger. He reached over and pushed me down, his body following me onto the couch, resting between my open legs.

  The kiss that followed was on another level from anything that we had done up to this point. I guess he was getting as frustrated sexually as I was. Our teeth gnashed together, tongues swirling, licking and biting each other. It was maddening and erotic as hell.

  I felt primal in my need for him to take me. Claim me.

  It was time to see if we were compatible on all levels but I had no doubt sex with Lucas will be life changing. I let my hands travel down his toned abs, my fingers dipping into each cut, each distinct muscle isolated and rippling under my fingertips.

  He stopped my hands before they got to his shorts and pulled away from our kiss. We both were breathing like we had been running a marathon. Each breath mixed with the others’, absorbing each others’ essence.

  “I wanted to talk to you about something but you looked so damn beautiful I couldn’t help myself.”

  “I don’t want you to help yourself, I want you to make love to me. Please, Lucas. I think we have waited long enough.” I tried to reason with him as I allowed my other hand to start its descent into nirvana.

  He grabbed the other hand and placed both of them over my head holding them down with one of his. I felt so small and delicate under him but loved that he wasn’t soft with me. He was commanding and a little rough and it was making me wetter than I have ever been. I wanted him to fuck me.

  I needed him to fuck me. NOW!

  He kissed down my neck and I arched my aching core into his hard shaft, hoping to get some relief from the throbbing that was making me insane with lust. As he reached the spot under my ear, I was mewling and groaning as I got little movement to soothe my ache. His beard created sensation from my shoulder to my ear, and my entire body was on fire.

  He pulled back and I cried out in frustration. Why was he teasing me? I could feel his arousal, so I knew he wanted me.

  “Please, Lucas. I need you.” I sounded as desperate as I felt, hoping to get him to sweep me up, take me to my bed, and fuck me like he meant it.

  “We need to talk before we go any further. I want to make sure we are on the same page.”

  In a sudden movement that I was starting to get used to, he flipped us so he was seated on the couch and I was straddling his lap, his hard length visible through his shorts. He felt so good between my legs that I started to grind on him as he gripped my hips. He gently rocked me along his length as he started to kiss on my neck lightly.

  “I wanted to ask you a few questions and then I have a surprise for you.” He said between nips and licks on my neck

  “I’ll answer any question you have so ask away.” I replied honestly.

  “You and I know that we are going to be taking the next step in our relationship and I wanted to ask about birth control. When I claim you—and I am claiming you—I don’t want there to be anything between us. I want to feel every inch of your perfect body, so please tell me you are covered. I am clean and have my test results from a month ago. I got tested shortly after I met you, praying for the day when I could finally have you.”

  I loved he wasn’t shy about his desire and we were having this conversation fully clothed. I respected his ability to think with an erection the size of his, pulsing under me, as I eased my grinding to a slight undulation.

  “I’ve been on birth control since I was thirteen. I had a problem with my, well, everything down there, and the pill has resolved some of my issues. I’m clean too. As you know, I haven’t been with anyone in quite a while and I had my physical six months ago. All clear.”

  “Have you always used condoms?” he asked and I got a little defensive that he assumed I was careless.

  “Have you?” my tone accusatory as I tried to climb off his lap.

  He locked his arms around my waist and hauled me back against his thick shaft.

  “Yes. Every single time since the very first time. I wasn’t implying anything, baby. It was selfish of me to ask that, but my inner caveman wanted to know if I was your first. I’m sorry.” As he kissed each cheek, my nose and finally my lips.

  “Me too. Every time. I’m not ready to be a mother.”

  “Do you want kids? We haven’t talked about it but I am curious.”

  “If you would have asked me that a year ago, I’d have said no. Emphatically. Now, I think I like the idea of kids and a family in the future.”

  “What changed?” his tone eager and hopeful.

  “You, Lucas. You changed me and I am so happy you are in my life. I love you.”

  “I love you, Maddie. So much.” As he kissed me gently. It was perfect for the moment and I wished I could freeze us here in this exact spot in time and space. Just Maddie and Lucas and their perfect love.

  “Would you like to go to my lake house this weekend? I just had it opened for the summer and I would love to show you my favorite place to be, besides with you. It’s quiet, isolated from neighbors and has a reading area I think you may fall in love with. So, what so you say? What to spend the next three days getting some sun and relaxation?”

  “That sounds amazing. When do you want to leave?” I was excited about getting some uninterrupted time with Lucas so I can take my time and fully explore his rock-hard body.

  “Can you be ready to leave in an hour? The drive up is about an hour and a half and I need to stop by my house to grab some clothes. I should have planned better but I just got the call today that the cleaning service was able to get it opened up and groceries stocked. You can pack light because I don’t plan on letting you out of my bed the whole weekend.” He smirked at me, his beard framing his perfect face.

  I couldn’t wait to wake up next to him in the morning.

  “Yes! I’ll get some clothes together and call Caroline to let her know where I will be so she doesn’t worry. I can be ready to go in a few minutes.” I gave him a quick peck on the lips and jumped off the couch, practically bouncing down the hallway into my bedroom.

  His laughter from the living room was a balm to my soul. The sound making me feel lighter and happier than I have ever been.

  As I was putting my bathroom
items into the bag, a movement caught my eye, causing me to freeze in place.

  A butterfly was sitting on my vanity mirror, its wings spread out to show the beautiful royal blue center, brown edges with white dots. I was afraid to move or breathe in fear of scaring the delicate creature.

  I immediately felt the tears falling from my eyes but did nothing to wipe them away. A feeling like my mother was sitting next to me, telling me how proud she was of me and how she was glad I was finally living my life, overtook me.

  Her words from her letter ringing true.

  Love with your entire heart. Have faith and be brave.

  I will mom. I promise.

  I gently placed my hand near the butterfly and it flew to me, landing with a tickle, flapping its wings a few times. I took a minute to look at the creature resting on me and I suddenly understood more than I ever had about myself, causing the final pieces of the concrete around my heart to fall away into dust. I had spent my entire life hiding in a cocoon, afraid to show the world who I really was for fear of being hurt. Lucas had given me the strength to face my past and encouraged me to fight my way out of the cocoon I had placed myself in.

  My wings were able to expand and I was finally able to fly free, to experience love and all the amazing parts that go into giving your whole heart to another person. I was no longer afraid to share myself or dream of a future that I wanted. A husband, kids, forever.

  I slowly walked through the apartment toward the sliding glass doors. As I slid the door open, I felt Lucas come up and gently wrap his arms around me, resting his chin on my shoulder to look at the blue butterfly I was holding.

  “Where did she come from?” he asked without making sudden movements, almost like he was afraid she would leave.

  “I found her waiting on my bathroom vanity. Isn’t she beautiful? I’m not sure how she got in but she deserves to fly free outside.”

  I raised my hand and Lucas slowly slid his hand under mine as the butterfly flapped its wings and gently flew off into the setting sun.

  He turned me in his arms and noticed my dried tears. “Why the tears Maddie?” he asked with a small smile on his face.

  “My mom used to call my butterfly. I think she may have been telling me its okay to open my heart. To let someone love me.” I admitted, wanting him to see that he had my heart and I trusted him to take care of it. For once, I allowed myself to be vulnerable.

  He pulled me into the deepest hug I have ever experienced. His arms wrapped around me, his face buried in my neck, breathing me in. As he pulled back, I saw the unshed tears in his eyes matching mine.

  “I love you, Maddie.”

  “I love you, Lucas.”

  We arrived at my lake house a little before midnight. Maddie had fallen asleep about twenty minutes after we left my house. I had given her the fifty-cent tour as I threw some clothes together and grabbed a few bottles of wine from my wine cabinet, rushing to get on the road so we could get here. I needed to be completely alone with Maddie so I could worship her body the way I’d craved since the moment I first saw her picture.

  I used the remote to open the garage door and parked the car inside. She stirred when I turned the car off and looked over at me with a sleepy smile on her face.

  “I’m sorry I fell asleep. I must have been more tired than I thought. What can I do to help?”

  “Let me show you inside the house and I’ll come back and grab our bags. I want you to relax and let me pamper you this weekend.” I said as I softly kissed her lips.

  We walked into the house and I was nervous to see what she thought of my oasis. I came here most weekends during the summer and generally spent my vacations here. I traveled enough for the company that I wanted to be able to relax when I was at home.

  Her eyes were darting around the open floorplan, trying to take in all the features I had installed when I renovated the house a few years back. The house is two stories, both accessible from the outside, as the house was built into a hill that gently sloped into the dock and lake below.

  We had come into the living room area that connected to the kitchen, which looked over the eating area and reading nook. Behind the eating area was a wall of windows that during the daytime showed the lake and woods that surrounded us.

  I took her hand and gently brought it to my lips.

  “What do you think? Do you like it?”

  “I love it. Its so open and airy. I can’t wait to see the view tomorrow. I bet it’s pretty amazing.”

  I walked her toward the windows and turned the lights on that went out the back of the house overlooking the lake.

  She gasped and looked up at me with surprise and a huge smile. The back deck ran the length of the house, with a hot tub in the corner under the pergola, a built-in grill and enough comfy couches and chairs to host a party on.

  She reached up and kissed me, slowly working her tongue against mine, her soft groan cutting the silence around us.

  I pulled away and took her by the hand to the deck. I used the hidden wall controls to turn on the hot tub and mosquito lamps that ran the entire length of the house, blanketing the area in a muted flickering flame.

  I wanted her relaxed and her mind clear for the next few days. She had a busy week coming up and I won’t be seeing her as much as I have over the last few weeks. It was already driving me crazy knowing she will be meeting alone with other men for the finalization of the contracts. I offered to accompany her but she pointed out that this was her project to run and they had to see her as the woman in charge… not the woman who needed a man to come along and protect her.

  I understood what she was saying and I agreed, but it made my inner caveman grunt and beat his knuckles to the dirt, wanting to show who she belonged to.

  “Would you like to get into the hot tub tonight? I can open a bottle of wine and make us something to eat. The service stocked the fridge and pantry for us so I can make you a snack, or more, if you are hungry.” I asked as I kissed down her neck, her back against my front, gently pushing myself against her.

  I smiled when her head fell back against my shoulder and she pushed back against me. Maddie wanted this as badly as I did and tonight I’d finally get to make her mine.

  “Take me to bed Lucas. Please. I need you.” She groaned as I nipped and sucked on the tender spot below her ear and gently stroked her full breasts over her shirt.

  I spun her in my arms and picked her up, bridal style, and marched back into the house, straight to the master bedroom.

  I gently laid her down on the king-sized bed and brought my body to hers, kissing her, urging her to feel my love through every stroke and lick of my tongue.

  She looked up me with her blue eyes, her brown hair fanned out on the pillow like a halo, as I pulled her shirt up to expose her stomach. I kissed every inch of skin I could as I gently lifted and took off her shirt. With my lips exploring her covered breasts, she reached behind her and took her bra off, setting her beautiful breasts free.

  Her nipples were a dusty rose surrounded by her tanned skin. I took her nipple in my mouth, my tongue laving the erect bud, my teeth teasing and nipping as I moved from one to the other. I was starving for her and had to remind myself to be gentle with her. I didn’t want to hurt her or push her too fast.

  She writhed and moaned my name the more I worked her engorged breasts, shamelessly rubbing against my hard cock, begging for her release. I slowly worked my way down her stomach as I worked the button of her pants open and pulled the zipper down, pulling her pants and panties off in one motion.

  She was finally naked underneath me and she was more perfect than I could have ever imagined. I sat up and observed her, letting her know with my eyes, how much I enjoyed her openness and desire to be with me.

  I grabbed the back of my shirt and pulled it off, discarding it somewhere over my shoulder. She sat up and kissed me, her breasts pushed against my chest, as she reached down and unbuttoned my pants, she reached her small hand into by boxers, grabbing me with
a firm grip and began to pull and tug on me.

  I pulled back and took the rest of my clothes off, immediately putting myself back between her spread legs, her desire glistening on her pink lips and her inner thighs. I took her hand and placed it back on my throbbing cock, squeezing a little harder than she had, letting her know what I liked.

  I let her touch me for a few minutes as I placed my finger on her slick pussy and slowly ran my fingers up and down, never quite touching her clit. I wanted to drive her crazy with need and from the feel of her pussy, she was wet and ready for my cock.

  I needed to taste her and make her come on my tongue before I allowed myself the pleasure of feeling her pussy wrapped around me. I worked my way down her body, kissing every spot I could before settling between her thighs.

  I ran my lips up her inner thigh, the smell of her like an aphrodisiac, urging me to taste and lick her wetness from her. I gently licked her from back to front, the tip of my tongue swirling around her hard clit.

  “You taste so fucking good.” I groaned as I licked and sucked on her hard bud, darting my tongue inside her pussy, trying to taste more and more of her.

  “Lucas” she moaned and writhed under me ministrations. “Please make me come. Please.”

  “Anything you want baby.” I replied before diving back in and working her faster and faster with my lips and tongue. I flicked her clit and gently pulled it into my mouth, working it over with a rapid strokes that had her tightening up and her back arching.

  I knew she was about to come and I couldn’t stop when she was this close. I forced my eyes to look at her as she tipped over the edge and screamed my name into the air.

  “Lucas! Oh my God! Lucas!” she chanted and shouted as her body convulsed under me.

  Maddie’s orgasm was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Her faced flushed, her breathing was rapid as she let the pleasure overflow from every pore of her body.

  I climbed her body and settled myself inside of legs, where I belonged. After tonight, there would be no doubt that Maddie was mine and I was hers.