Texas Desire

by Holly Castillo

  It was Olivia’s turn to chuckle. “Don’t you think that is a bit exaggerated?”

  “It’s how I feel.” He leaned down and she lifted her face to his, anticipating the sweet taste of his lips on hers. The kiss was gentle and light, not asking for anything from her, yet Olivia could feel the passion he held back.

  She pulled back slightly, looking up into his eyes, then her gaze roved over his cheeks, his slightly crooked nose, and his lips. This could be the last time she would ever see him again, depending on what happened on the morrow. She wanted his face branded into her brain, so that even when she was eighty or older she would remember him, and remember him exactly as he looked in that moment. The sun was beginning to set, casting unusual shadows across his face, and he had a thick beard growing, covering parts of his face.

  “What thoughts run through that mind of yours?”

  His voice rumbled against her body and she realized she’d been staring at him. “You look better without a beard,” she said, smiling.

  He feigned a shocked look on his face and began to try to tickle her neck with his beard, and he soon had her laughing so hard she could barely catch her breath. God, how long had it been since she had laughed like that? How long had it been since she had allowed any type of joy in her life? She had always thought it was disrespectful in the face of her parent’s death. But now... now it seemed right.

  Having finally regained some of her composure, she settled back into Cade’s arms. “So, what are your plans to rescue Bella? I don’t think they’ll just let us walk into the camp, do you?”

  Cade shook his head. “No, they won’t.” He sighed heavily and pulled her sideways so that she could face him. “I think... the absolute best plan is for you to stay here.”

  “What? Stay here? Why on earth would I do that? I can’t help you from here!”

  “And you won’t be in any danger here, either.”

  “Oh, no. You are not going to walk out on me, Cade. You know that I am just as invested in finding your daughter as you are.” She pulled away from him and turned, facing him, trying not to grind her teeth in frustration.

  Cade ran a hand down his face wearily. “I don’t want to fight with you about this, angel. We have no idea what we’re going into to try to get Bella. And you’ll certainly be noticed.”

  “You haven’t been paying attention to all of the information we’ve been getting. Santa Anna has women traveling with them to keep the men—satisfied. A woman in their camp won’t be an unusual thing.” She crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow, daring him to say something.

  “And what if they are only allowed in one part of the camp and you go waltzing into an area where you don’t belong? And what if you are spotted by one of the soldiers that has eaten at the cocina? There are too many things we don’t know enough about.” He shook his head at her.

  “That’s why we have to scout the camp before we enter. We’ll know what we need to do. You did say you were a spy for the Texians, didn’t you?” Olivia could feel her face getting flushed as her indignation grew.

  Cade reached out and caught her shoulders. “Angel, I can’t let anything happen to you. Between you and Bella, you are the two most important women in my life. I can’t lose you.”

  Olivia was momentarily stunned. He had just said she was one of the two most important women in his life. And that he couldn’t lose her. Did that mean he wanted a future with her? Did that mean—

  “Besides, if I don’t return you in one piece to your sisters, they will do far worse to me than the Mexican Army ever could,” he said with a lighthearted grin, unaware that he was crushing her heart with his attempt at lightening the feelings around them.

  “Cade, I want—I need to be able to help with Bella. I can’t stop here.”

  His fingers squeezed her upper arms almost painfully. “You aren’t listening to what I’m trying to tell you. It is too dangerous. I can’t let you go.”

  Olivia’s anger threatened to boil over. “You have no right to tell me what I can or can’t do. I’ve come this far, and I intend to see this through to the end.”

  “And it may very well be the end of you. Listen to me, Olivia!” He shook her slightly. “Listen to me! I’ve seen what these men are capable of. I’ve seen how they treat women, especially Texian sympathizers, and it is a terrible thing. I won’t be able to live with myself if something happens to you. All it takes is for them to find out you’re a Texian. And they’ll figure that out rather quick.”

  Olivia saw the genuine fear for her in his eyes and felt tears burning the backs of her eyes and her throat. He had already been through so much... had seen so much, things that no man should ever have to see. And she took hope from the concern in his eyes. Perhaps he truly did have feelings for her, but just didn’t know how to express it the right way.

  “Angel... please. You have to listen to me and stay here. I can’t protect both you and Bella at the same time.”

  Olivia bit back her retort that she didn’t need him to protect her and that she had been protecting herself for years. But, for the time being, she needed to pacify him, at least for a little while. He would see differently in the morning. She would make certain of it.

  She reached up and placed her hands on his face, lightly stroking his beard. “Alright. If that is what you need from me... then that is what we should do.” She did her best to seem defeated, to make him think she was disappointed, instead of inwardly plotting what she would really do.

  Chapter Twenty

  That night, unlike most of the other nights, had been warmer, and they had enjoyed lying together in the log, teasing each other with sweet kisses wherever they could find a bare piece of skin. But they were too exhausted to go very far, and fell asleep wrapped in each other’s embrace.

  Olivia knew something was wrong the moment she woke up. She was tense, and it felt as if there was a rock in the bottom of her stomach. She turned within the log and realized Cade was gone.

  She gasped, noticing the sun was already peeking through the trees and scrambled out of the log, praying with all her might that she would find him out there, warming up some of her leftover biscuits. But he was nowhere to be seen.

  Neither was his horse, his guns, his saddle, and his saddlebags. He had left her. The realization hurt... it stung so sharply she sat down hard on the ground. He had left her without even saying goodbye, knowing this could very well be the last time she would ever see him.

  Once he found Bella, she was certain he would return with her to East Texas to rebuild his ranch. She would never see him again. She clenched her hands into fists.

  No. She wouldn’t let him do that to her. She was going to get to tell him goodbye, she was going to get to see Bella and hold her and kiss her as she had imagined, and then—only then—would she be ready to say goodbye. He would not steal that from her.

  Quickly, she began to gather up her belongings and saddle her horse. She had planned all along that she would head to Harrisburg, ideally using a different path than Cade so he wouldn’t catch her again, and then help with the search for Bella.

  She wouldn’t be able to tolerate not knowing what had happened to that innocent girl, nor could she watch Cade put his life in unnecessary danger in order to save Bella when Olivia could help him.

  As soon as she had gathered up all of her belongings and loaded them in the saddlebags on the horse, she mounted and took off at a fast trot, heading just north of the direction Cade had taken. She would veer back onto the path once she was close enough to the camp and wouldn’t be at risk of Cade sending her back.

  Suddenly, she heard a noise coming from up ahead, and she hesitated, pulling her horse to a stop. It was voices. Male voices, speaking in Spanish.

  With her heart racing, she leaned low over the horse and urged it forward slowly, until she could just make out the two men. Their backs were to her, but she recognized the white uniform of the Mexican soldiers instantly.

  Slowly, quietly, she slid o
ff her horse and grabbed her rifle. She couldn’t shoot them outright—the sound would carry way too far. But she had to do something. Gripping the rifle tightly with sweaty palms, she advanced on them.

  The talk amongst each other was loud enough that neither one of them noticed her approach until she was almost upon them. One of the soldiers turned in surprise and she swung her rifle as hard as she could and heard the loud crack as it hit his head. He tumbled to the ground and began to roll down the slight incline she had just climbed, nearly taking her with him.

  But she dodged him at the last second as she swung her rifle again. But this soldier was already prepared for that attack and grabbed the butt of the gun before it struck him and gave her a terrifying smile. Using the rifle, he yanked her closer to him, speaking in a cooing voice to her in Spanish, saying things that were making the very tips of her ears turn red.

  He pulled her in closely and, as he tried to lean in to place his disgusting lips on her skin, she brought her pistol up that she had kept hidden in her skirts and struck him as hard as she could in the back of the head. The crack was an awful sound and he fell hard, tumbling down to join his partner on the ground.

  Olivia stood still for several minutes, trying to catch her breath and coming to terms with what she had just done. She had probably killed both of the men, considering the force she had hit them with, and the large bulges on their heads. Oh, dear God, she hadn’t wanted to kill anymore, but, it was as Cade had said—it was war.

  To be on the safe side, Olivia took vines that she found lying around and tied the men’s hands and feet, making sure there was no way for them to get free without having some help. And, given the condition they were going to be found in, Olivia doubted they would want to tell anyone what had happened even if they did survive.

  She hadn’t planned on the delay, and knew moved Cade closer to the encampment than she would like. She wanted to be with him when he first went into the camp. With determination, she mounted her horse again and took off at a fast trot, her eyes probing everything around her and trying to stay as close to the trail that he would have taken as possible without being detected.

  Everywhere she looked there were discarded items. Entire pieces of furniture, expensive pottery, even heirlooms, wasted by the roadside, abandoned by the Texians as they heard of Santa Anna’s approach. They feared for their livelihood and for their families but, in the end, they had made the choice that would allow them to flee certain death that much faster.

  The last report Cade and Olivia had gathered was that Houston’s men were headed towards Harrisburg, where it seemed they might actually finally engage with Santa Anna’s men, who had just arrived there the day before, furious at having lost the fleeing newly-founded Texian government that had traveled on even further.

  But with Houston approaching Harrisburg as well, there was a good chance battle was inevitable, and that meant sweet Bella could be caught in the crossfire. Olivia wasn’t the only one consumed by these thoughts. She could only imagine the pain Cade was going through, wondering if he had taken too long to heal, or if he had paused too many times along the journey, and could lose her before he even got close.

  Lost in her thoughts, Olivia wasn’t prepared when her horse stumbled and nearly fell to his forelegs, and she was pitched forward. She had no chance to grab the pommel of the saddle to catch herself and was tossed about, landing so hard on the muddy ground that she felt sharp leaves and twigs cut through her clothes and into her skin.

  But she had been prepared enough to keep her gun with her. Before her assailant was upon her she had her pistol out and cocked and aimed at his head. She couldn’t see his face as he was blocking the sunlight, but she didn’t care. She hadn’t come this far to lose everything now.

  Her finger tightened on the trigger before the gun was ripped from her hands and she was yanked to her feet, all in the same motion. “Give me that damned thing,” a familiar voice growled. “If you were going to kill me you would have already done it. I swear, woman, you test even the sanest man...” His voice trailed off as he turned to head back to his horse, tucked away behind thick shrubs where she wouldn’t have been able to see him.

  Or maybe she would have if she’d only been paying attention. “That’s a bit of a stretch, don’t you think? Referring to yourself as a ‘sane man?’”

  Cade turned to face her, leading his horse behind him. “Yes, yes, you’re right. I’m completely insane. And do you know who has made me insane? You! You! It’s as if you just want to go looking for trouble. You ride towards hostile territory with your head in the clouds, and you think I’m the one that’s insane?”

  Olivia could feel a fine trembling in her hands and clasped them together tightly so he wouldn’t see. “I told you all along that I intend to help you get Bella back.”

  “But not like this! Not like this. You have a home and people who love you dearly who expect you to return to them safely. You keep careening through these woods like this, and you’ll get caught and maimed and murdered in no time.”

  He is really angry. She grimaced inwardly. There was a small vein at the base of his neck that throbbed with each of his rapid heartbeats, and it was all because of her actions.

  “Let me help rescue Bella. Please, Cade. I must help.”

  “She is my daughter. This is my responsibility. And twice now you’ve demonstrated you have no idea how to sneak up on someone, let alone follow at a distance where you won’t be noticed. You’re a risk, Olivia. A risk I cannot and will not take.” He looked back to his horse and tightened the cinch and was about to mount when he turned back to her.

  “If you try to follow me, or if you even go on your own wayward trail, you will leave me with very few choices. And the one I like best is tying you to that horse and smacking its rear until it runs all the way back to the ferry.”

  Olivia placed her hands on her hips. “You may have me at a disadvantage when it comes to sneaking up on you, but I am not as inept as you think.” She turned from him and stomped over to her saddle bags and pulled out a bundle of white clothing. White Mexican Army uniforms.

  Cade froze, his eyes fixated on what she held.

  Then his eyes lifted to hers and she couldn’t tell if his anger had calmed slightly or escalated significantly. “Where. Did. You. Get. Those.” Each word was clipped and seemed forced from his lips.

  His anger had escalated. She almost wished she could put the garments back and that he could forget he ever saw them. But, she was an honest woman, so she would tell him the truth.

  She stood straight and tall, her usual stance when she wasn’t being disarmed by Cade. “I came across two sentries on my way. They weren’t facing me, and I was able to incapacitate them with my guns. Then I took their clothes and tied them up.”

  “You did what?” Cade exploded.

  Olivia lifted her chin. “You heard me. I took care of the threat and I gained us something to help us sneak through the camp.”

  Cade’s hands clenched and unclenched, and he was breathing harshly through his nose. Within two strides he was gripping her by the arms, hauling her up on her tiptoes so that she was nearly eye level with her. “I heard no gun shots. What did you do?”

  “I—well, I hit them. In the back of the head. With quite some force. I’m afraid I killed at least one of them.”

  He released her and took a step back, running a hand down his face, staring at her as if she were unlike any creature he had ever seen before. “You’re impossible,” he whispered, “absolutely impossible.”

  Olivia wasn’t sure what he meant by that, but she was in his arms again, yet this time he was kissing her, pressing his lips against hers in a way as though he wanted to claim her, to mark her as his forever. And she loved every second of it.

  When they broke apart, their lips were dewy and they stared at each other breathlessly.

  Finally, Olivia broke the silence. “So this means you’re taking me with you?”

  Cade knew he should
be angry. Olivia wasn’t supposed to be with him, and he would be much more comfortable easing up on Santa Anna’s camp thinking she was safe in the log he had left her in that morning.

  He should have known she would come after him. Hell, maybe he had even hoped she would come after him. Nothing felt normal anymore without her. Riding in silence he had felt as if he was missing something, something very important. And he had finally realized it was Olivia.

  For even when they rode in silence together, there was a connection, a warmth, a feeling. He’d been missing that all morning long. Until the hairs on the back of his neck had stood up and he knew that someone was trying to track him.

  He had rigged the trap to stumble the horse and pitch the rider, and his heart had nearly lurched into his throat when he had seen the black-haired beauty who was starting to become his world go flying in the air and hit the ground.

  But his fear over her being hurt was quickly outweighed by his indignation, and he had wanted to put her on her horse, smack it with his leather reins, and watch the horse race away to a safer place for Olivia. Why did she have to be so stubborn?

  Without turning his head, he observed her from the side. They had already changed into the white uniforms, and while his was a tad too tight on him, hers was loose, almost to the point of being baggy. But she still looked good. Even with her hair bunched up underneath the hat. He was surprised at how grateful she had been that the hat could pull down past her damaged ear. He knew it bothered her, but he hadn’t realized how much.

  Her smooth olive skin was exposed all along her neck and at the open collar, and his thoughts began to drift to some of their more intimate moments they had experienced together. He shifted in his saddle and forced himself to focus back on the camp ahead of them. The woman had such an incredible impact on him. He desired her with a ferocity he had never felt before.