Damarian (A Merman's Kiss Novel)

by Dee J. Stone

  I look into her eyes that are determined but full of pain and guilt. “What shall I do, Cassie?”

  She does not seem to know the answer any more than I do.

  ***

  I am not certain how I have managed to sleep when my heart is torn. Now that I have awoken, I am not certain I will able to sleep again. My head lies in Cassie’s lap and her hand strokes my hair. Periodically, her fingers sweep away my tears.

  “I cannot live solely on land, Cassie.” I sit up and weep into my hands. “I cannot. The sea is my home.”

  Cassie rubs my back. “I know. Will anyone from your family come to see you?”

  I feel my shoulders fall forward, as though they are broken as well as my heart. “One is not to associate with one who has been banished.”

  “Maybe Doria or Kiander—”

  “No.” I cry into my hands again as it finally dawns on me that I will never see anyone from my family again. Not my parents, not Kiander, Doria, Syd or Syndin. Not Zarya.

  I spend the next few minutes sobbing and releasing all the ache I feel in my heart. Cassie remains silent, soaking in my words and rubbing my back. When it seems I can no longer shed any more tears, I say, “Thank you, Cassie.” She has not grown frustrated with my behavior, but is supportive and comforting.

  “Do you want to do something?” she asks. “Maybe to take your mind off things?”

  “May we visit the sea?”

  Her eyes search mine. “Are you sure?”

  “Yes. Perhaps…” A painful swallow travels down my throat. “Perhaps…”

  She appears doubtful, but says, “Okay. Let’s go.”

  There are many humans on the beach. Cassie and I walk to a location devoid of any human. She sits down on the sand next to the tide and presses her legs to her chest. I hesitantly step closer to the shore and wait for the tide to wash over my toes.

  Nothing occurs. My legs can no longer support my body, and I plummet to the sand, my chest falling forward, my face crushed into the wet sand. The sea rolls over me, burying my face beneath its strength. I do not shift.

  The cool water—which I now realize is colder than I have ever felt it—feels good against my skin, but I do not receive the same nourishment and love as I did when I was a child of the sea. As though I no longer deserve it.

  Cassie’s cheek touches mine. “Come. Let’s go for smoothies. It might make you feel better.”

  I am not very aware of when Cassie brings me to the store and when Leah offers me that beverage I found very delicious. She attempts to converse with me, but I cannot hear anything, other than the anguished cries in my heart. But then she says the word, “Damian,” and I am hit with new-found pain.

  “Damian. That is who I shall be. Damian.” I once again weep into my hands.

  Leah taps my arm. “Hey, it’ll all be okay. Whatever you’re going through.”

  “It will not,” I mutter. “It will never be all right.”

  Cassie leaves for a few moments. Leah attempts to speak to me, to console me, but I can never be consoled. I am in too much pain to be thankful to both Cassie and Leah for trying to comfort me. I take the beverage and drink it. It is quite delicious, but I cannot enjoy it.

  When Cassie returns, I ask her if we can return the beach.

  “Okay,” she says. “If that’s what you want.”

  We sit down near the tide and watch it roll over our feet. “Never have I imagined Father betraying me so,” I say, my voice devoid of any emotion. “Never have I longed this much for the sea.”

  She touches my knee, her hand warm and soothing.

  “I feel ill. As if I may perish.”

  “I understand how heartbroken you are. I wish I could do something to help you.”

  I close an arm around her and tug her close to me. “You are the only light in my life. If not for you, I am not certain what shall become of me.”

  “What the hell?”

  I raise my eyes to the location of the voice and find former child of the sea, Kyler of the Emerald clan, gaping at us. He takes in my skin, the same color as Cassie’s, my less vibrant eyes, and my hair that is no longer a golden shade but a dull dark yellow.

  Kyler bows and lowers himself to his knees. “My king. What happened?” His eyes examine every inch of my face. “You are no longer…”

  Cassie says, “Kyle, this isn’t a good time—”

  “He’s banished?” His mouth falls open. “Who—”

  “Kyle, please,” Cassie implores.

  “Who will be the king?”

  “Kyle!”

  My eyes move to the sea as anger consumes me. That is all he is concerned with? That I will no longer be king? That is the manner in which every child of the sea has behaved. They have not seen me as an individual being with needs and desires. Only the heir to the crown.

  “Forgive me.” Kyler bows again before walking away.

  “I wish to leave,” I tell Cassie.

  She takes my hand and leads me out of the beach.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  I lie in bed in the room Cassie has given me. She sits by my side, offering me comforting words and asking if I am hungry. I cannot eat. I cannot sleep. I am not certain how I will bear the rest of my moons. “I am sentenced to live in the same manner as Kyler of the Emerald clan,” I say.

  “Kyle didn’t have me.” She lowers herself near me and stares into my eyes. “You have me, Damarian.”

  I look into her face, seeing how much love and concern she has for me. She has tolerated it all, my yells, my cries, my tears, my negative behavior. She did not grow upset or frustrated. She has shown nothing but love. I pull her to my chest. “Forgive me, Cassie. I am behaving like a fry. I understood the danger when I left the sea. I left so you and I could be together. You are the most vital one in my life.” I touch her hair. “I wish to be with you for all eternity. I shall learn to embrace my new life as a human, for you are part of it.”

  “I’m so sorry it has to be this way.”

  My lips journey over her skin. “It is all right. I shall learn to love this life. I shall learn to say goodbye to my family.”

  Uttering the words cause tears to fill my eyes, but I must be strong. If I spend the rest of my moons mourning the life I have lost, I will not be able to live the life I have chosen. A new life, with my sweet Cassie by my side. No longer will I have to worry about how she and I could spend eternity together. I will try to be the best mate possible, bring her as much happiness as I could, and ascertain that I am providing her with all that she needs.

  I will grieve and miss my family all my moons, but I have no choice but to accept the circumstances. Truthfully, I cannot feel guilty for this, for it is not my doing but Father’s. He is the one who has severed me from my family and my life in the sea. I must stop placing the blame on myself.

  ***

  My eyes open at the sound from downstairs. Cassie sits up and blinks. Someone is knocking on the door.

  “Stay here and go back to sleep,” Cassie says. She dresses into her shoes and leaves my room. I strain my ears to hear, but I do not hear anything. I suppose I must grow accustomed to this, for I shall never have my acute hearing again. I lie down and fold my hands underneath my head, staring at the ceiling. Thoughts of my current situation and how much pain it causes me crowd my mind, but I force them away. I do not want to spend the rest of my moons bitter and unhappy. I wish to be joyful and content.

  After some time has passed, I hear footsteps on the stairs. My eyes open to the sight of Kiander. I sit up. “Brother.”

  Kiander inclines his head. “Brother.”

  I stand and walk to him. As I take him in, I realize he appears different from the last time he was here. He skin is more luminous, his eyes more bright, and he stands more confidently. My eyes widen in shock. It cannot be…

  I lift my arms over my head, press them together, and lower my head. “My king.”

  Kiander lays his hands on my head. “At ease, Brother.” He tu
rns to Cassie, who stares at him with shock and confusion. “Where is Kyler of the Emerald clan?” he asks.

  She is too stunned to speak at first. “He’s at home. What’s going on?” She looks at me. “He’s the king?”

  “Brother, I do not understand.”

  “I have taken Princess Flora as my mate.”

  I merely stare at him in disbelief. “Kiander—”

  He raises his hand. “It is the duty I have taken. The crown is now on a Sapphire head. The clans are united.”

  I move closer to him as guilt overtakes me. “It was not your duty to take.”

  “I have accepted the responsibility. I have no reason not to take it.”

  When I glance at Cassie, I see she is still shocked, and guilty as well, but she appears relieved. I see the love for me gleaming in her eyes.

  I turn to Kiander. “My king. I apologize for any—”

  “It is all right. All is well. Come. Let us return to the sea.” He nods to Cassie. “Summon Kyler of the Emerald clan to rendezvous with us.”

  She communicates with the former child of the sea through the phone and informs us he will meet us at the beach.

  “Very well.” Kiander exits the room.

  I stare after him, uncertain of his true thoughts and feelings. He does not look upset or happy, but as king I suppose he does not wish to show what emotion he feels. Has he sacrificed his life for me? I hope not, for if he had, I will surely kill him.

  Cassie slides her hand into mine. “What’s he doing?”

  “I am not certain.”

  We descend the stairs and leave the house, where Kiander waits. He leads us to the beach, close to the shore. Another being makes his way into the beach—Kyler. He wears nothing but the rough pants called jeans. When he joins us, he, too, appears confused. Then he notices Kiander, and he quickly bows. “My king.”

  “Stand before me,” Kiander orders.

  We comply.

  He lifts his hands, touches his left one to my chest and his right one to Kyler’s. He closes his eyes. “As King Kiander of the children of the sea, I hereby grant you pardon of banishment. You may return to the sea.”

  As he removes his hands, I feel sharp pain all over my body and collapse onto the sand. The same painful sensation I felt that day in Cassie’s living room. Kyler is on the ground as well, and our bodies crash into each other’s as we howl in agony.

  Through the pain, I hear Cassie tell Kiander we must be in the sea. The next moment, I am being shoved into the water. At once, the familiar burning sensation surrounds me, and then I am once again a child of the sea.

  I cannot help but marvel at my tail, noticing just how beautiful it is. Cassie is in the water and swims toward me. I hurry to meet her, then gather her in my arms. Closing her limbs around me, she laughs as she kisses me. “You’re a merman.”

  “I am no longer a human,” I say, not able to believe it.

  Cassie glances at Kyler, who stares at his hands, feels his gills, and touches his emerald tail. He, too, appears as though he cannot believe what his eyes see.

  Kiander leaps into the ocean, and his tail protrudes out of the sea thirty seconds later. As king, his tail is more luminous and beautiful than any other child of the sea, save for Princess Flora. Kyler bows and thanks him profusely.

  “What happened?” Cassie asks me.

  “The king has the ability to pardon banishment. My brother has granted Kyler permission to return to the sea.”

  Kyler bows once again. “I am grateful, my king. You are most generous.”

  Kiander nods. “You have been absent for far too long. I am certain your family will be overjoyed to see you.”

  “As am I, my king.”

  Kiander focuses his attention on me. “As king of the children of the sea, I give you permission to travel freely from sea to land. My only requirement is that you be discreet.” He places his hand on my shoulder. “Welcome home, Brother.”

  I carefully lower Cassie into the water and take my brother in my arms. He appears taken aback by my gesture, for he does not understand what a hug is, but he does not push me away. “You will be a fair king, Brother. A revered king. A great king. I am extremely grateful for your kindness.”

  “I shall return to Eteria. Will you join me, Damarian?”

  I look at Cassie. She nods for me to go. I wish to see my family very much, and I must make peace with Father. “Shortly, Brother,” I inform Kiander. He nods and submerges under the water.

  “Cassie.” Kyler swims to us. “I’m so sorry for everything. For hurting you and threatening to tell everyone about Damarian’s secret. I was so sad. All I wanted was to return to the ocean.” His eyes move to me. “I’m sorry.”

  “It’s okay,” Cassie says. “I totally get it. I’m really happy for you.”

  He thanks us before diving into the sea.

  Only Cassie and I remain. She gazes into my eyes and I into hers. She has so much happiness for me. I lift my hand and caress her check.

  “Go home,” she says.

  “I must make peace with Father.” I lay my forehead against hers. “I shall return to you, Cassie.”

  “Even if you can’t return, it’s okay. I want you to be happy.”

  “I am happy when I am with you. I shall return.”

  She takes hold of the back of my head and brings my lips to hers. I put everything I feel into this kiss, showing her how much love I have for her and how I will return to her because I wish to spend every moment with her. I will seek Father and help him understand that this is the life I want to live and how much I wish for him to be part of it.

  When my lips lift off hers, I murmur, “I shall return to you, my love.”

  I kiss her one more time before disappearing under the waves.

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Kiander and Kyler wait for me, as well as six members of the Guard, including Morteran, and eight great white and hammerhead sharks, Fiske among them. He hurries to my side and inclines his head.

  Kiander nods to the Guards and sharks. “Now we may return to the colony.”

  They surround Kiander as we swim homeward. I squeeze through them so that I may swim by his side. “Brother.”

  “We will not speak until we reach the colony. As you know, the royal family is not allowed to leave Eteria. The queen and former king are slightly upset that I have left. But as you understand, I needed to.”

  I nod. “Thank you for all you have done, Kiander. I do not think I can ever repay you.”

  He shakes his head. “There is no need to repay me. I am the king of the children of the sea, and it is my duty to ascertain that every creature in the sea is both safe and happy.” He smiles. “And you are my brother.”

  We do not speak for the rest of the journey, for the Guards wish to bring the king home safely as quickly as possible. Kyler does not utter many words either, for he is too busy studying every inch of the sea, marveling at its beauty as though he is seeing it for the very first time. I cannot imagine how difficult it has been for him, banished for twenty-four moons. I do not think there is a more suited king than my brother.

  When we arrive at the colony at last, the Sentinels hurry to let the king and his companions pass. Fiske remains with them to continue his training.

  Kiander informs me I am to accompany him and the Guards to Eteria. We bid goodbye to Kyler, who appears both apprehensive and excited to return to the Emerald colony.

  As we pass the many children of the sea swimming about, they all turn to stare at us. At first, I assume they are looking at Kiander, their new king, but after a few minutes, it is apparent that they gawk at me. Is it due to the fact that I did not take the throne? They do not seem to have any ill feelings toward Kiander, but I cannot be certain.

  My brother’s eyes follow my gaze. “I regret to inform you that word about your travels to land and choosing a human as a mate has spread through all the clans.” He looks apologetic. “We could not withhold the truth after I took the throne
.”

  I am not certain what to make of this. Will I now be ostracized by my own race?

  As soon as we enter Eteria and near the palace, I notice something vastly different from the last time I visited. In addition to the hammerheads patrolling the area, there are many great white sharks as well. As there are bull, blue, and tiger sharks, though not in great numbers like the hammerheads and great whites.

  Some of the sharks that escorted us home part to the side while the others enter the palace with us. They swim off to patrol. We swim until we reach the room where the king and queen sit on their thrones. Once we near the entrance, a Violet announces, “His Royal Highness, King Kiander, and Damarian of the Sapphire clan.”

  Queen Flora, who sits on her throne with the former queen’s tiara on her head, straightens her shoulders. Floating next to her are her parents, the former king Palaemon and former queen Lamara, and two large hammerhead sharks. As soon as we near them, Kiander, the Guards, and I fall to the floor and lower our heads. Palaemon and Lamara bow before Kiander.

  Queen Flora lays her hands over her mate’s head, and he lifts it. “I am glad to see you are well,” she says with a loving smile. Her eyes move to me. “And I am glad to see you well as well.”

  I lower my head again. “Thank you, my queen.”

  Kiander rises off the floor and slides his hand into the queen’s. My eyes linger on them for a few moments. The gesture is quite surprising. It appears the king and queen are very much in love.

  Queen Flora lifts off her throne. “Please excuse us,” she says to her parents and the Guards. “We have much to discuss with Damarian.”

  Morteran leads the king and queen to the adjacent room. I hurry after them. The Violet Guard remains outside while the three of us settle on the stone. I cannot help but notice that my brother’s hand tightly claps his mate’s.

  Queen Flora follows my gaze. “I see you are confused.”

  I shake my head. “Not confused, Your Highness. Surprised.”

  She glances at Kiander and once again smiles lovingly. “You were correct, Damarian. There was indeed a male in the sea who would love me in the manner you love your human.”