Alpha

by Kim Faulks

  I jerked my gaze to X. She looked so fucking drawn, so damn shattered. One tiny nod of her head was all she gave. But it was enough. Damnit, it was enough.

  Gunny turned her head and I felt the weight of those black orbs. “And you…you want her? She’s yours. You deal with her. You fucking control her. Whatever lives she takes, it’s on you.”

  I nodded, mirroring X. “Deal, it’s a fucking deal.”

  “So let’s get to drinking and say good bye to our mate.” Gunny leaned in, punched my shoulder and winced. “Fuck, sorry…forgot you got shot.”

  I reached for my shoulder. “Some of us aren’t filled with a damn Dragon’s power you know. Speaking of Dragon, where is he?”

  “With Zadoc and Joslyn,” she answered, looking me straight in the eye. “I needed to be here and he needed to be there.”

  “Remember that time Stitch got so drunk he slow danced with a damn mop in the middle of the mess hall for a fucking hour?” Irwin muttered.

  The image took hold. I could still see him, lips puckered, fingers speared through the strings, murmuring sweet fucking nothings as if he was in love.

  A snigger broke out, then a laugh. I lifted my head catching the wide smiles and the shake of a head.

  “Wasn’t so bad,” Gunny growled.

  “Except it was in the middle of the day,” Ace chimed in.

  “And he was calling the mop Henrietta,” Irwin added. “After Staff Sergeant Henries.”

  “And he couldn’t dance for shit,” I ended.

  We all stared at each other with shit-eating grins that spread as the silence grew.

  Irwin was the first to break, bending over and howling with laugher. Ace followed and then Gunny.

  I sucked in a breath as the tremble took hold remembering how the entire fucking hall just stood and stared, and then I roared with laughter.

  5

  X

  Thunder cracked overhead, tearing me from a dreamless sleep. I blinked and stared into the dim light. A snore echoed from somewhere down the hall. The night came back to me, as did the one before.

  I rolled over and hissed as an ache tore along my chest. Careful fingers pressed between my breasts, wrenching a gasp free.

  Screaming won’t save you, bitch. Not this time.

  Be seeing you, X.

  My feet tangled in the blankets as I kicked. I didn’t want to come back here, didn’t want to put Alpha in danger—not after all he’d done. I glanced to the gold-colored diary on the dresser. The blank pages waited for me, all I needed was to write. Just one word…just one sentence.

  I closed my eyes. He defended me to the people he loved—he looked after me, protected me…and he deserved more.

  Be seeing you, X.

  I shoved aside the blankets and dropped my feet off the bed. Cuts and scratches were healing…slowly. No food slowed down the process. I was nothing more than weak…thunder cracked, I jolted with the sound.

  Weak.

  My feet hit the floor. I left behind warmth and safety and wrenched open the door. Empty bottles lay scattered on the ground.

  You’re not going to find that here, okay? Not with me. Alpha’s tender words came back with a roar.

  The hallway blurred. I stumbled for the kitchen. Deep snores echoed from the cracked open door. My steps stilled. I lifted my hand and pressed my fingers to the wood. He was kind and good, as good as a man I used to know. A man who smiled and held me….dance little wolf…dance.

  Alpha lay on his back, bare chested, eyes closed. I wanted to step inside his room. I wanted to see this man, see what goodness really looked like. I wanted to touch him, feel the warmth of his skin and the strength of his arms.

  I wanted more than he could give…and more than I had a right to ask.

  Weak.

  A flash of lightning ripped through his room. Here was a mortal ready to risk it all for the ones he cared about—I turned and headed for the back door. We were worlds apart…and yet he was the one worth dying for…he was the one worth fighting for.

  I hit the door and stumbled down the stairs, leaving the house behind and made for the trees. There was more green here than I’d ever seen, crowding all these houses front and back. I wanted to run and keep on running—and I would have but for one thing…

  Alpha.

  He was good. He was so damn good.

  Say one fucking word to your boyfriend and I’ll come for you…

  Diamond and the others would come anyway. It was who they were—it was what they did. They’d come and they’d kill. I stumbled for the tree line as the rain pelted down.

  Heavy drops smacked my face and ran down my scalp. They’d kill…just like they killed before.

  Dance little wolf…dance.

  I shook my head and dropped to my knees.

  Dance…

  “Leave me alone…please leave me alone.”

  Kind brown eyes filled my mind as I sank my fingers into the mud. Grandfather was here, just as clear as all those years ago. I pulled away, but the memory cornered me and closed in.

  Dance little wolf.

  Anger tore from my lips like the jagged wound of lightning across the sky. “What do you want from me!”

  Dirt crammed under my nails as I raked the ground. My wolf neared, teeth bared, ready to fight. “Stay away from me! Stay away…just stay away.”

  Be seeing you, X.

  A flicker of my past echoed…dance little wolf.

  The wolf stepped closer and with the beast came the heavy throb of a tribal drum.

  Orange flames flickered in my mind, dragging me back to the night when my people danced around the fire. Men and boys moved as one…a strength dance, a fighters’ dance…but the beauty was the women…it was all about the hands. Sweeping movements, drawing up and over, so seamless like the wind…there was no stopping them…

  Dance little wolf…dance.

  My fingers twitched, aching to resurrect the movements now…my palm longed to feel the bite of steel and the softness of leather.

  Dance little wolf…dance.

  I dragged my fingers from the sodden earth and stood on trembling legs. The memory of my people took hold. A quake ripped through my chest. The boom resonated, filling every dark corner of my mind.

  My wolf neared, dark lips curled, eyes glowing like the full moon on a starless night. I shoved myself up from the ground and stumbled forward. Branches poked and prodded as I speared through.

  My fingers skimmed branches, bending, testing, searching, finding what I needed. The snap of the wood resounded. I tore the branch free and closed my fist. The weight was perfect for my strength, soon I’d need a new one…but for now…for now I only needed to…

  Dance…

  I tracked my trail back to the clearing at the rear of the house. Raindrops pelted down, battering against my head as I stumbled into the open space. My ancestors were so close now. The throb of their drums resonated, spilling into my hands. The beautiful woman smiled at me as she danced. I clung to this memory, letting my hands fall and rise. Sweeping over my head only to cut the air.

  Dance little wolf. My grandfather whispered. Warmth spread. My soul soared higher than an eagle, cutting through the winds until my arms ached with the movements. I was weak, like a wolf learning to walk for the very first time.

  But I would grow strong. I would not stop.

  My legs trembled, knees locked into place. I clenched the stick, twirling over my head and back down, movement after movement, over and over until I could no longer feel my arms…and I could no longer think—I could only feel.

  Scattered bodies surged to the surface. My people, hacked, bleeding, screaming. They lay in clumps on the ground, still huddled around the campfire with vacant stares and ended dreams.

  My people were murdered in the middle of the night by a pack of wolves. They were my kind, but they were not. Just like Helen, the wolf who took me in. They came like the bloodthirsty animals they were, howling and attacking with such savagery that we had
no hope of escape.

  Run little wolf…run and don’t look back.

  I could still feel the shove my grandfather gave me as they descended.

  Run…

  I ran until the dark familiar landscape was nothing more than a blur, trees splattered the mountain range, cutting the moon from my sight. I tried to surge forward, but the screams of my people held me back.

  There you are, the monster growled, and the past came to life.

  I spun on that mountain, stumbled and fell into the hard, pebbled rocks…the same ones I played with only days before.

  The shifter rose from the darkness as though the shadows gave birth to a monster.

  I knew you’d run, he growled and reached for me. You’re a fighter, aren’t you? What’s your name?

  I shook my head…my name lingered on the tip of my tongue. He moved closer, barely scattering the stones as he reached for me. Cruel fingers dug into the flesh of my arms, gouging muscle into bone.

  His fingers found my head, skimming down my hair. He brushed the strands over the front of my shoulder and down my chest. The whites of his eyes shone in the dark. The screams of my people were silent now…

  Gonna be some fun times ahead with you and me. His fingers skimmed my shoulders, moving lower, finding the parts of me that made me whimper with fear.

  No name? He murmured and dragged me closer. His heavy hand reached under my shirt. Cloth tore, the sound carried into the open night. Tears slipped down my eyes. Fight, the voice of my grandfather came to me. Fight little wolf…remember our dance.

  I clenched my fist and swung. My hands cut through the air, finding soft flesh. A grunt echoed. Claws sprang from my fingers. I spun, raised my hands and lunged. But the monster was too fast, grasping my wrists and driving me backwards. I kicked and screamed, shaking with rage and pain.

  That's the way, fight…I love it when they fight. The monster threw his head backwards and howled into the starless night sky.

  He dragged me, kicking and screaming, back toward the camp and all the while, he chuckled. What’s your name?

  A stillness settled deep, silencing the child in me. My soul turned quiet, as though I had none at all. I clamped my mouth closed. This monster would take…I knew that now. He’d take and take until there was nothing left…but a name.

  He couldn’t take that from me…

  No name? Then I’ll call you, X…and you can call me Diamond.

  That memory flooded me as I gripped the stick. Heavy drops splattered my eyes, blurring the trees. I didn’t need to see…I didn't need to do anything but feel.

  No name…no family…

  The squeal of hinges ripped me from that thought, still I never stopped the dance, bringing the stick down until a width of a blade of grass was all that stood between the end and the earth. I swept high cutting across and then down.

  I could feel Alpha’s gaze like a warm hand on my shoulder, just as I felt the spirit of my people in my veins.

  A howl cracked through my head. I stilled the movement, cocked my head and listened. But the piercing sound was for me…and me alone.

  My wolf raised her snout to the sky and howled. The solemn sound carried until I felt the hum deep. I smashed my lips together and returned to the stance my grandfather taught me. The corners of my mouth curled and those tribal drums resonated with every thud inside my chest.

  They were not gone…I’d not lost a thing.

  All I had to do was remember…

  6

  Alpha

  Footsteps echoed down the hall behind me. I knew the gait, knew his scent—Cool Water by Davidoff hit me like a blast.

  “What the hell?”

  I didn’t need to turn my head. Ace saw the same thing I did. The waif moved like a dancer, bending and swaying, dragging that stick over her head only to slice the ground. I narrowed my gaze, watching when the movement would come again. The grass never moved as she swept the end low. Not one blade moved—not even a damn whisper.

  “Jesus. How long she been out there?”

  I shrugged. “Don’t know, she was there when I woke up, doing the same damn thing over and over.”

  “You think she…you know, lost her mind?

  She turned at the waist, never moving her solid stance and swept her hands through the air, twirling in a dynamic sequence over and over, until the dance changed and she moved onto another.

  She speared her hands out from her waist, clasped the air in front, and brought it under. I could stand here mesmerized for hours…I had stood here mesmerized for hours. “I don’t know. But if that’s what losing your mind feels like, then I’m all fucking for it.”

  “Is she…smiling?”

  Something in my chest soared. I nodded. “Yeah, I think she is.”

  “She’s not like the others, brother. She’s different, and not in a good way.”

  I didn’t need him to tell me that. I opened my mouth and tested my jaw. The kid was fucking scary, like lock your bedroom door at night scary. But there was something about her, something I’d felt since I picked her up from the floor in that building.

  I’d kill a hundred men before I let one make me a slave.

  Her warning still echoed inside my head. I stared at her movements, what once was awkward now flowed like a river. She wouldn’t kill…I wouldn’t let her.

  “She stays here, Ace. She stays here and she loses her mind. She loses the thing until she finds it again. She’ll hurt and then she’ll heal, and maybe she can teach me to do the same.”

  “Just don’t get too close. They’re not like us, they could be here one minute and gone the next.”

  I clenched my jaw and the ache bit deep. I didn’t need Ace to tell me that. I didn’t need him to tell me a damn thing.

  “Having trouble with the kids again?”

  I jerked my head toward him. “Why?”

  “Your gate was closed, wasn’t closed last night when we left.”

  The room seemed to close in. First the file, and now the gate. Someone wanted my attention…and they damn well had it. “Must be the kids,” I muttered and turned back to X.

  “Piss on your lawn, mark your territory. That’ll keep the little vermin away.”

  I forced a smile and nodded. “Yeah, might do that. You heading out?”

  The glimmer of laughter died in his eyes. “Felix and Jayde are coming with us this time. See if they can pick up the track where we lost it.”

  Any other day guilt and helplessness would’ve torn me in two, but not today. X’s movements slowed, she was tiring. Still she never stopped dancing.

  We were fighting the same war…just on different sides. I turned my head to the cupboard where I stashed the file. It was only a matter of time before we closed in.

  “Be careful out there,” I muttered and turned to my best friend. “Watch your damn back.”

  Ace nodded and raised his hand. The slap of our palms stung, and he was gone striding down the hallway. Our squad of five had slowly drifted away, as though Stitch had been our tether and we were now adrift, floating in different directions.

  I covered the kitchen in long strides and yanked open the door. The black binder waited in the corner, the end creased, pages exposed. Whoever left this for me wanted me to know they weren’t far away.

  They weren't here to kill me…so what the hell was in this folder they were so desperate for me to know?

  Soft grunts echoed from outside. X was tiring, slowing but not stopping. I pulled the folder free and made for the table. My damn hands shook as I opened the cover and stared at the pages. The first one was a newspaper clipping from twenty years ago when the President’s National Advisor Nick King went missing.

  I remembered the day, clear as any other. It was the same day they pulled my father’s car from the river. One man went missing, another died. Every moment burned into my memory.

  The slow walk home from school.

  The cars lined along the street outside my home.

  My mom
waiting on the front steps clutching a sodden handkerchief. Her eyes red from crying. I was only eight—I leaned back in the chair—eight years old and fatherless.

  I turned over the article and stared at data sheets. I’d seen ones like this before in the cave where we found the tortured shifters. Names, blood types, medical information, pages and pages of data along with a list of compounds. I scanned the details. None were familiar.

  There was nothing else. I turned back to the clipping. The date was a neon fucking light in my eyes. I focused on the arrogant stare, the title clipped and to the point.

  Presidential Senior Advisor Missing at the Height of New Corruption Allegations.

  I fumbled for my phone and slid my thumb across the screen and punched in the guy’s name. Nick King…the hits were outdated, looked like there’d been nothing for the last fifteen years. At first, there were the usual conspiracy theories he was murdered by his own people, killed by an assassin, and the last one was that he was still alive.

  Alive and in hiding…waiting for the right moment to show his face to the world.

  And for the right reason.

  So was this the reason?

  Was Nick King tied up in this shifter war?

  What was twenty years to these beings? My mind drifted to the Dragons, cut off from reality. How did they not see what was under their very noses?

  It was simple, they didn’t want to.

  If I had the opportunity to live my life in peaceful slumber, would I do it?

  Ten years would feel like the blink of an eye to them, one hundred years might be a nice break…a thousand?

  Jesus. I shook my head and pushed away from the table. My life seemed so damn fleeting. Just a drop in the fucking ocean. The harsh wheeze of jagged breaths pulled my focus outside.

  Ten years could feel like nothing, or forever—depending on where you were—like in Hell for instance.

  Nothing you want…nothing you want…no more, please no more.